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Old 01-02-2017, 09:12 AM   #81
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Frugal, it seems that you do have several paths to consider, since you say you are in a position to retire "now" if BF would join you. I take it that marrying BF now and downsizing now are not an option (whether you are working PT or not). But you sound so ready to go - and it does not seem a position where mind games would work for you (unlike me) - because you are so far from the goal. Can you cut your years in half - that would make it much more bearable. Can you cut your active years in half and THEN transition to the lower paying, fewer hours option - and view that as your pre-retirement planning stage? You said you had weekends free, mostly. Is there a way to make them freer? Household cleaning help once every two weeks? Carve out a two hour special space for getting outdoors (my regular nostrum) or pursuing a special interest - maybe researching your annual vacation - once a weekend? Good luck!


Thank you! I'll keep you posted. I'm just lucky to be in this position at all. Many will never have the option to retire early, if at all. Happy New Year.
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Old 01-07-2017, 02:22 PM   #82
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Does anyone have a recommendation for a book(s) that help train yourself?
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Old 01-07-2017, 02:25 PM   #83
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Does anyone have a recommendation for a book(s) that help train yourself?
The Ultimate Bar Book: The Comprehensive Guide to Over 1,000 Cocktails
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Old 01-07-2017, 03:59 PM   #84
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I found "Slowing Down to the Speed of Life" very helpful, but the helpful ideas are buried in lots of psychobabble.
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Old 01-07-2017, 08:08 PM   #85
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Good one. Maybe it will help.
I'm one who has also decided to wait through an additional year to ER and at times find it difficult to focus on work, especially on Monday mornings after re-running retirement calculations over the weekend (still searching for the missing piece that will confirm that I can go ahead of schedule). But Monday morning after things start getting involved you somehow melt back into the old work routine like before. When time permits, I have started to do little things "under the radar" in preparation for the end like taking home some small personal items, cleaning out some older files and emails. I have also made small reminder notes to myself like the little BS bucket on my whiteboard and the milestone indicators on my calendar as I get through one more quarter. Nobody else knows what these things mean but it seems to help me deal with it in some strange way.
I had replaced the previous boss when he retired and he pretty much just "checked out" a year before he was gone and folks still talk about how he was totally disengaged for that period. I totally understand how stressful things get and how easy it would be to do that, but I told myself I don't want to leave that way. I believe my regional people still need a responsible advocate to keep things moving in the right direction because they are much younger and will be there awhile yet.
So my plan is to stay under the radar until about July, then tell my people about it first. Between now and then I will just try to maintain a good attitude and treat my people well, getting satisfaction from knowing this is the last time I will have to prepare a budget, conduct employee evaluations, etc, and knowing I have better things ahead.
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Old 01-07-2017, 08:56 PM   #86
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I am so surprised to see so many pre-retirees are dealing wi the same situation as mine. I work for a community bank where the CEO just announced his retirement. Although he told the board that he will work until the end of 2017 he has really already left in his mind and rarely comes to work.

The younger staff members are now wondering where their careers stand, etc.

I am close to retirement at 64 but still have about a year to go. Really tough seeing the worry on the staff's faces.


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Old 01-11-2017, 04:00 PM   #87
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I found that doing some daydreaming during meetings about what I would most likely be doing at that time and on that day of the week once I am retired had almost medicinal properties. Looking around the room at the guy whose leg under the table is vibrating from stress a hundred times a minute, the woman who keeps yawning from overwork and fatigue, and others who have seemingly resigned themselves to a really long string of crappy days, and thinking, "soon this too shall pass and I will escape to the land of my dreams" saved me often.

When I got to only one year left, then I had fun reminding myself of things like, this is the last annual review and planning meeting, the last holiday party, or the last staff evals I had to do, etc. were fantastic motivators to stay the course until the goal was reached.

On a more practical level I installed an IOS app that let me count down the days until my major event (FIRE). As significant numbers (e.g., 365 or 200, then 100) arrived, my wife and I would go out for a special dinner or a nice drink together and I would snap a photo of us. I would use this as the cover photo for the app, changing it only when the next milestone arose. This helped enormously, because sometimes I would just glance at the app at work, note the days left, and then walk around for 10 minutes smiling "baby wide" to the puzzlement of many.

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Old 01-12-2017, 09:24 AM   #88
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I work for a community bank where the CEO just announced his retirement. Although he told the board that he will work remain on the payroll until the end of 2017 he has really already left in his mind and rarely comes to work.
Fixed!

It's funny how when mid or low ranked employees put in less than a 100% effort at work they are "stealing time", but it is quite acceptable when a CEO does it. Related question: if sky-high pay for CEOs is warranted by the exhaustive nature of their employment, how is it that so many find the time to serve on other corporations' boards?
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Old 01-12-2017, 09:44 AM   #89
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Fixed!

It's funny how when mid or low ranked employees put in less than a 100% effort at work they are "stealing time", but it is quite acceptable when a CEO does it. Related question: if sky-high pay for CEOs is warranted by the exhaustive nature of their employment, how is it that so many find the time to serve on other corporations' boards?
IMO, "sky high pay" is warranted based on the rarity of their ability/education/experience combination coupled with the level of responsibility associated with the position they are in, not their number of hours needed to be worked.
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Old 01-12-2017, 11:46 AM   #90
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IMO, "sky high pay" is warranted based on the rarity of their ability/education/experience combination coupled with the level of responsibility associated with the position they are in, not their number of hours needed to be worked.
IMO, "sky high pay" has absolutely nothing to do with being in a position to fire the people who decide one's compensation. No correlation there at all. Uh uh.
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Old 01-12-2017, 12:10 PM   #91
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IMO, "sky high pay" is warranted based on the rarity of their ability/education/experience combination coupled with the level of responsibility associated with the position they are in, not their number of hours needed to be worked.
I don't want to high jack the thread, but will briefly respond:

1) There is nothing particularly rare about the typical CEO's ability, education or experience. There are plenty of able, hardworking, and seasoned business executives available (both with and without MBAs);

2) The average CEO has less personal responsibility / accountability than the average employee:

(i) CEOs have at least one year's 'honeymoon period' following their appointment, during which they can blame everything on their immediate predecessors. And during this period, boards are very reluctant to fire a CEO lest they look incompetent for picking the wrong person;

(ii) CEOs are able to more or less plausibly blame their companies' poor performance on various factors outside their control, e.g. the economy, government regulation, social activists, labour unrest, etc. etc.;

(iiii) finally, CEOs invariably have employment contracts that guarantee them massive 'golden handshakes' if they are dismissed for poor performance.
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Old 01-12-2017, 02:48 PM   #92
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The company I worked for asked me to give them one year notice when I decided to retire. I had no problem with that and that is what I did give. So I had one year to think about a lot of things and had a lot of time to plan for my future. It also was a long time to stay motivated but the time went fast and I did a lot of work with the guy that took my job. Stay focused and clean up some of the things you know that has to get done and don't start any big projects.
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Old 01-13-2017, 06:45 AM   #93
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Originally Posted by tcaron20 View Post
I am so surprised to see so many pre-retirees are dealing wi the same situation as mine. I work for a community bank where the CEO just announced his retirement. Although he told the board that he will work until the end of 2017 he has really already left in his mind and rarely comes to work.

The younger staff members are now wondering where their careers stand, etc.

I am close to retirement at 64 but still have about a year to go. Really tough seeing the worry on the staff's faces.


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This is an actual sentence in an email going around my office, which has folks chuckling:

"We are happy to announce that Jack _____, our Vice President of Investments, is retiring. We know many of you have enjoyed getting to know Jack during his time here and join us in wishing him well."
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Old 01-16-2017, 09:01 PM   #94
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I don't want to high jack the thread, but will briefly respond:

1) There is nothing particularly rare about the typical CEO's ability, education or experience. There are plenty of able, hardworking, and seasoned business executives available (both with and without MBAs);

2) The average CEO has less personal responsibility / accountability than the average employee:

(i) CEOs have at least one year's 'honeymoon period' following their appointment, during which they can blame everything on their immediate predecessors. And during this period, boards are very reluctant to fire a CEO lest they look incompetent for picking the wrong person;

(ii) CEOs are able to more or less plausibly blame their companies' poor performance on various factors outside their control, e.g. the economy, government regulation, social activists, labour unrest, etc. etc.;

(iiii) finally, CEOs invariably have employment contracts that guarantee them massive 'golden handshakes' if they are dismissed for poor performance.


Bravo! Couldn't have said it better
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Old 01-22-2017, 04:32 PM   #95
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Although the REWahoo recommend "Ultimate Bar Book" may help, I'm afraid that when I get to the end of 1,000 drinks, that may not be enough.

So using the DuckDuckGo search engine, I found a free PDF copy of the ugeauxgirl recommended book "Slowing Down to the Speed of Life". It's a decent book that I think may help. Thanks ugeauxgirl! The book seems to have a tone of using mindfulness. That led me to the book "Full Catastrophe Living" which has much more detail about mindfulness and training yourself to deal with stress. Got a lot left to read.

Now let me mix up a drink and turn the page.
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Old 01-22-2017, 07:41 PM   #96
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Although the REWahoo recommend "Ultimate Bar Book" may help, I'm afraid that when I get to the end of 1,000 drinks, that may not be enough.

So using the DuckDuckGo search engine, I found a free PDF copy of the ugeauxgirl recommended book "Slowing Down to the Speed of Life". It's a decent book that I think may help. Thanks ugeauxgirl! The book seems to have a tone of using mindfulness. That led me to the book "Full Catastrophe Living" which has much more detail about mindfulness and training yourself to deal with stress. Got a lot left to read.

Now let me mix up a drink and turn the page.


Love it! I'm goanna find that book. Glasses up!!
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Old 01-22-2017, 08:00 PM   #97
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Bravo! Couldn't have said it better
Popular, but uniformed opinion.
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Old 01-27-2017, 11:13 AM   #98
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Although the REWahoo recommend "Ultimate Bar Book" may help, I'm afraid that when I get to the end of 1,000 drinks, that may not be enough.

So using the DuckDuckGo search engine, I found a free PDF copy of the ugeauxgirl recommended book "Slowing Down to the Speed of Life". It's a decent book that I think may help. Thanks ugeauxgirl! The book seems to have a tone of using mindfulness. That led me to the book "Full Catastrophe Living" which has much more detail about mindfulness and training yourself to deal with stress. Got a lot left to read.

Now let me mix up a drink and turn the page.
Insight Timer (app) was a big help to me too- I have ADHD which makes it really hard to meditate, but starting with guided meditations on the free app really helped. I really tried to read "Full Catastrophe Living" but could not get through it.
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Old 02-07-2017, 11:32 PM   #99
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This is great topic and thread - especially since I am aiming towards retiring at the end of 2019 when I will be 60 years old and my wife will be 58. She is already retired.

The posts here are all good and I agree with so much that has been said - it really helps to know that I am not unusual to be thinking of FIRE alot and am so ready to be free to live life as my wife and I choose.

This has really hit home the last couple of years as most of the men I have worked with the last 40 years have already retired. And unfortunately the last 3 or 4 years quite a few have had serious medical issues - the life changing kind, or have passed away.

I work for mega oil corp, and we live overseas. Job is very high stress, around the clock tied to cell phones and pooters and the oilfield is 24/7 so every day is a work day. I have done it all my life and the oilfield has been good to us - but it is all consuming - especially overseas living in a compound that we cannot leave due to security issues.

One work friend / colleague who was planning to retire this year - just had a serious life changing medical / health issue. That really hit home to me.

And just yesterday, I was trying to contact a colleague to consult on a technical issue who I worked with for years in another countries affiliate and was sad to hear he had passed away.

And there's several more who have died right in the home stretch.

For my wife and I - we are just being patient. We know that it is not too far off that we will be living on the lake and we can be fishing, hunting, gardening, family time, ......all the good stuff .....

Thanks to this forum for all of the good advice and for having a place to visit and read/share with other folks who are at similar stages of life and career.
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Old 02-08-2017, 08:59 AM   #100
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This is great topic and thread - especially since I am aiming towards retiring at the end of 2019 when I will be 60 years old and my wife will be 58. She is already retired.

The posts here are all good and I agree with so much that has been said - it really helps to know that I am not unusual to be thinking of FIRE alot and am so ready to be free to live life as my wife and I choose.

This has really hit home the last couple of years as most of the men I have worked with the last 40 years have already retired. And unfortunately the last 3 or 4 years quite a few have had serious medical issues - the life changing kind, or have passed away.

I work for mega oil corp, and we live overseas. Job is very high stress, around the clock tied to cell phones and pooters and the oilfield is 24/7 so every day is a work day. I have done it all my life and the oilfield has been good to us - but it is all consuming - especially overseas living in a compound that we cannot leave due to security issues.

One work friend / colleague who was planning to retire this year - just had a serious life changing medical / health issue. That really hit home to me.

And just yesterday, I was trying to contact a colleague to consult on a technical issue who I worked with for years in another countries affiliate and was sad to hear he had passed away.

And there's several more who have died right in the home stretch.

For my wife and I - we are just being patient. We know that it is not too far off that we will be living on the lake and we can be fishing, hunting, gardening, family time, ......all the good stuff .....

Thanks to this forum for all of the good advice and for having a place to visit and read/share with other folks who are at similar stages of life and career.


You are so close! Eyes on the prize! I just loaded my retirement countdown app on my phone this week. Am really enjoying taking a peak at it this morning. You are so right about illness and death sending home the message that we don't have forever, and tomorrow isn't promised. I've lost 2 family members and a friend since New Years.

Best of luck to you and your wife! You are on the home stretch.
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