Join Early Retirement Today
Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Old 01-29-2014, 04:39 PM   #21
Recycles dryer sheets
 
Join Date: Dec 2009
Posts: 348
Seconding the suggestion for taking an adult education class. I enrolled in an evening class at the local highschool; welding. No better ice breaker than to have your shirt tails on fire. Met a really nice bunch of guys who seemed sincerely concerned for my well being
__________________

__________________
zedd is offline   Reply With Quote
Join the #1 Early Retirement and Financial Independence Forum Today - It's Totally Free!

Are you planning to be financially independent as early as possible so you can live life on your own terms? Discuss successful investing strategies, asset allocation models, tax strategies and other related topics in our online forum community. Our members range from young folks just starting their journey to financial independence, military retirees and even multimillionaires. No matter where you fit in you'll find that Early-Retirement.org is a great community to join. Best of all it's totally FREE!

You are currently viewing our boards as a guest so you have limited access to our community. Please take the time to register and you will gain a lot of great new features including; the ability to participate in discussions, network with our members, see fewer ads, upload photographs, create a retirement blog, send private messages and so much, much more!

Old 01-29-2014, 06:22 PM   #22
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Katsmeow's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 3,395
This is actually an issue for me that I have yet to solve. I am definitely an introvert (INTJ, very strong on the I). However, I do like having some social contact although I like it in relatively small doses with relatively small groups.

Back when I was working full-time I got most of my social contact at work, in addition to my husband who I consider my best friend. DH retired almost 4 years ago and is basically fine with having social contact with me, our kids who are at home and occasional contact with people he knew from work or family. But, really most of the contact he has from people outside of our house is initiated by them.

I semi-retired when he retired and since middle of last year I've worked entirely from home. I've realized increasingly the past few months that I'm not having enough social contact to suit me. I like my contact with my husband and kids but would love to have some outside friends. How to find those friends is a little perplexing to me as an introvert.

We live in a nice area, but most of the people in this area are different enough from me that it makes me not that easy. For instance, this is an area where many people are very religious and I'm not. I feel somewhat isolated in that my views on things are just not typical of "most" people in this area.
__________________

__________________
Katsmeow is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-29-2014, 08:16 PM   #23
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
haha's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Hooverville
Posts: 22,382
Quote:
Originally Posted by Moemg View Post
Nice Fantasy but in reality most women would not appreciate the friendships unless the other woman was a relative , 90 or did not like men. IMO!
So that's what caused my divorce! Narrow minded ladies.

Ha
__________________
"As a general rule, the more dangerous or inappropriate a conversation, the more interesting it is."-Scott Adams
haha is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-29-2014, 09:53 PM   #24
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Major Tom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: SF East Bay
Posts: 3,129
Quote:
Originally Posted by haha View Post
I think if someone is not having sex or intending to have sex with outsiders, they should be able to have whatever friends they want.
Ha
All the women I have been involved with have had very good instincts as to whether my friendships with other women were genuinely platonic, or had the potential to develop into something more. In some cases, they could tell the other woman was interested in something more even when my primitive self was convinced otherwise. However, whenever I've had a purely platonic friendship with a woman, my partner at the time recognized this and relaxed, realizing it wasn't a threat.

Women can sense these things, even when us dumb guys can't. On the other hand, if your partner is insecure, or you are giving him/her reason to feel insecure, all bets are off.
__________________
ER, for all intents and purposes. Part-time income <5% of annual expenditure.
Major Tom is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-29-2014, 10:17 PM   #25
Dryer sheet aficionado
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 34
Move to a retirement community, hiking club, softball teams, golf leagues, photography club, poker club, dance, and another 20/40 I can't think of.

On top of that there are any number of opportunities of volunteering in any community.

Don't let being an introvert prevent you from retiring.

One quote that helped me retire was "you don't want to be the richest person in the cemetery"
__________________
chas57006 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-30-2014, 12:11 AM   #26
Recycles dryer sheets
 
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Lafayette
Posts: 267
I second the recommendation for Meetup. I recently joined a hiking group in my area. You can be as sociable as you want in the group. Or just enjoy the hiking.

The first Meetup group I joined was about 10 years ago--The East Bay English Bulldog Owners Group. What a hoot--20 bulldogs running around. When I moved to San Francisco, I joined the bulldog group there.

When I was working a lot in Paris, I joined the Paris Walkers' United Meetup group. They're all over!

The groups provide social interaction with very little commitment. You can decide how much socializing you want to do with the other members.

Taking classes is another way to find friends, but as others have said, it does take time to develop relationships. I have made friends in my ballet classes, but over a period of 1 to 2 years. The shared experience (adults trying to be graceful) generates some bonding! I'm not saying I see these people all the time outside of class (or the meetup activities), but I do enjoy the time I spend with them.
__________________
gardenfun is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-30-2014, 08:08 AM   #27
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
travelover's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 9,878
Quote:
Originally Posted by travelover View Post
Plus 2 on Meetup, .........
Quote:
Originally Posted by gardenfun View Post
I second the recommendation for Meetup. ..........

Hey, no cutting in line.
__________________
Yes, I have achieved work / life balance.
travelover is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-30-2014, 10:24 AM   #28
Recycles dryer sheets
 
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Lafayette
Posts: 267
Quote:
Originally Posted by travelover View Post
Hey, no cutting in line.
Sorry, travelover, forgot Roberts Rules of Order!
__________________
gardenfun is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-30-2014, 10:27 AM   #29
Full time employment: Posting here.
Calico's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 921
Quote:
Originally Posted by zedd View Post
Seconding the suggestion for taking an adult education class. I enrolled in an evening class at the local highschool; welding. No better ice breaker than to have your shirt tails on fire. Met a really nice bunch of guys who seemed sincerely concerned for my well being


I was drinking diet coke when I read your post. You owe me a keyboard!
__________________

__________________
Calico is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
early retirement, introvert, loneliness, relocating


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Poll:Are you an Introvert or an Extrovert Keim FIRE and Money 127 08-25-2013 10:32 AM
As an introvert, this scares me. Ally Other topics 23 03-08-2012 11:32 AM
Frugal-yet-fun vacation ideas: need ideas from vagabonds OKLibrarian Other topics 23 04-12-2007 09:16 AM
Friends who love their work John Galt Other topics 15 01-04-2005 07:31 AM
Ideas, suggestions on portfolio after retiring Toejam Other topics 19 02-01-2004 10:38 AM

 

 
All times are GMT -6. The time now is 07:26 AM.
 
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.