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Very strange feeling
Old 03-13-2018, 07:54 PM   #1
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Very strange feeling

56 yrs old, FIRE for a couple months. Today was at the post-office getting my passport renewed. One of the questions the PO employee asked in order to complete one of my forms was my "where do you work?". I've been asked this question a million times while working for the same mega corp for 25 yrs, so it was super strange to say "retired". A bit of me felt anxious/insecure/guilty to say retired (= i am not working). I was surprised to have this feeling as FIRE
has been something I've worked for for so long, but understandable as I've I been conditioned to 'be working' for most my life and am at an age where most are working. This was a good reminder to say 'retired' with pride next time i am asked where i work.
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Old 03-13-2018, 08:20 PM   #2
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56 yrs old, FIRE for a couple months. Today was at the post-office getting my passport renewed. One of the questions the PO employee asked in order to complete one of my forms was my "where do you work?". I've been asked this question a million times while working for the same mega corp for 25 yrs, so it was super strange to say "retired". A bit of me felt anxious/insecure/guilty to say retired (= i am not working). I was surprised to have this feeling as FIRE
has been something I've worked for for so long, but understandable as I've I been conditioned to 'be working' for most my life and am at an age where most are working. This was a good reminder to say 'retired' with pride next time i am asked where i work.
Been retired under a year. Have to admit I do love saying I am retired. However, if there is an elderly person providing a retail service to me, I am conscious not to say anything.
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Old 03-14-2018, 09:26 AM   #3
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Here's another uncomfortable feeling: when friends and relatives mention w*rk.

It can be offhand, like "I'm so glad Monday is a holiday, I have the day off." Or they might be complaining about how they can't get anything done because of their w*rk schedule.

Sometimes, I make a joke of it. "I have that day off, too!"

But there are times when saying ANYthing can be interpreted as gloating, or as a put-down to the w*rking stiffs. I certainly don't want to offend anyone, or act superior to anyone. Hey, if they saw my pension check, there'd be NO jealousy. But I find I still have to be careful.
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Old 03-14-2018, 03:33 PM   #4
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I understand. I retired at 55 and for decades I always replied with "I am a ______." Now I'm getting comfortable saying "I was a ______, now I'm retired"
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Old 03-14-2018, 03:38 PM   #5
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"I am self-employed"
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Old 03-14-2018, 03:39 PM   #6
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I understand. I retired at 55 and for decades I always replied with "I am a ______." Now I'm getting comfortable saying "I was a ______, now I'm retired"
You can tell you have really arrived when you no longer feel the need to say the "I was a ______" part.
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Old 03-14-2018, 03:47 PM   #7
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Not really an issue since I'm 60. But, like others, when chatting with my elders working at Home Depot, I'm "between jobs."
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Old 03-14-2018, 03:48 PM   #8
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You can tell you have really arrived when you no longer feel the need to say the "I was a ______" part.
I arrived the day I retired.
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Old 03-14-2018, 05:04 PM   #9
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I tell people I can't wait until Friday, when I get the day off from swim practice and pickleball.
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Old 03-14-2018, 05:15 PM   #10
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I've mentioned it before, but DW suggested that I tell people that I am a private money manager. I like it!
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Old 03-14-2018, 05:38 PM   #11
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I've mentioned it before, but DW suggested that I tell people that I am a private money manager. I like it!
My wife is also suggesting I obscure my retirement status.
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Old 03-14-2018, 07:04 PM   #12
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I've mentioned it before, but DW suggested that I tell people that I am a private money manager. I like it!
My DW suggested I tell people that I'm unemployed so as to explain the way I dress.
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Old 03-14-2018, 07:40 PM   #13
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I arrived the day I retired.
Amen.
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Old 03-14-2018, 08:19 PM   #14
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My answer is and has always been "retired"

I don't tell lies and I could care less what people think of me for telling the truth.

If you don't want to hear the answer, don't ask the question.
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Old 03-15-2018, 07:13 AM   #15
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RobbieB, I admire your approach.
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Old 03-15-2018, 07:19 AM   #16
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I tell people I can't wait until Friday, when I get the day off from swim practice and pickleball.
I like that and will use that response! LOL
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Old 03-15-2018, 07:28 AM   #17
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I sold my business last year but have a payout going out 4 more years under a consulting contract/stock purchase agreement which simply requires me to be "available" for consultation.

When asked the question I still say I am employed by the company even though I work (telephone calls) less than an hour per week.

I guess I am not comfortable with the label either.

Hard to teach a 58 year old dog new tricks.

+1 on "My DW suggested I tell people that I'm unemployed so as to explain the way I dress." She doesn't like my cargo pants and sweatshirts....
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Old 03-15-2018, 07:37 AM   #18
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... it was super strange to say "retired". A bit of me felt anxious/insecure/guilty to say retired (= i am not working). I was surprised to have this feeling as FIRE
has been something I've worked for for so long, but understandable as I've I been conditioned to 'be working' for most my life and am at an age where most are working. This was a good reminder to say 'retired' with pride next time i am asked where i work.
Don't worry, you will get used to it pretty quick!

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But there are times when saying ANYthing can be interpreted as gloating, or as a put-down to the w*rking stiffs. I certainly don't want to offend anyone, or act superior to anyone. Hey, if they saw my pension check, there'd be NO jealousy. But I find I still have to be careful.
+1. I have always been careful to "know my audience" when making comments about being retired. At this point, I really don't say much of anything to anyone...they are simply all too sensitive. I have made it a point to NEVER gloat, but my retirement status will come up in conversation on occasion, and I am obliged to confirm that being retired is pretty damn awesome. I am sorry that there are so many haters out there!
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Old 03-15-2018, 01:00 PM   #19
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Not certain why the need to hide the fact that one is retired? It is never about gloating. It is about being factual.
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Old 03-15-2018, 01:10 PM   #20
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I haven't run into any haters yet. And it's not that I'd hide anything.

But timing is everything. It's easy for someone who's had a hard day to mistake an offhand comment as gloating or, worse, judging. I don't want to bring anyone down, so I've learned when it's OK to bring up the fact that *I* didn't have to work today, and when it's not.
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