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What would Mega Corp Do If I Just Stopped Going To Work?
Old 02-04-2010, 01:31 PM   #1
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What would Mega Corp Do If I Just Stopped Going To Work?

This idea had not even crossed my mind, but a few people I know suggested it.

Here's the scenario, I have worked for Mega Corp for 13 years (since its inception), moving to middle management and getting great performance evaluations every year (one but a few weeks ago) and reaching all personal goals set in these. I have decided to retire at the end of April this year but have not communicated this to my superiors yet.

Typically, I have received bonuses and stock grants yearly that equate to about 20% of my gross. In the last two years I (or anyone) has received merit increases and promised that the new stock program would make up for it. Well my stock grants received last week equaled .3% (yes .3 not 3%) vested over 3 years!? Meanwhile the new CEO got 800,000 shares as did the rest of upper management on a sliding scale. This has infuriated everyone and taken as an insult. We (me and staff) have worked hard with very little resources to keep things running smoothly over the last few years and as per the memo, "These grants are intended as a reward for your hard work"!? The only possible reasoning behind this is either stupidity (I know these people and they are not stupid) or likelier is to cause further attrition that the company will not have to pay for (making people quit, without severance). I have formerly expressed this to management and they have been eerily silent on the mater.

So now I'm ticked off and thinking of doing just that...stop showing up at work.

Have you experienced this and or what do you believe will happen? I think it might be fun!

E86S54
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Old 02-04-2010, 01:45 PM   #2
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This thread reminds me of a story - Who knows if it's true - but I like the story...

I had a friend who formerly worked at Honeywell. The story is - from the friend, is that management was bad so people were leaving right and left for other jobs. One guy decided to take another job and not formerly quit the Honeywell job. he just didn't show up any longer. He also changed his phone number. His paychecks were posted automatically to his bank account.

Well it took Honeywell 2 or 3 months to figure out that the guy wasn't there anymore and to terminate him. The story is, is that he was able to keep all those extra checks.
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Old 02-04-2010, 01:55 PM   #3
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MasterBlaster,

Yeah...I would get fired eventually. But I believe that if this made it to court, it would be apparent that something went wrong in the course of a few weeks after 13 years as a stellar employee.

If I just got fired and nothing...well that's what I was planning anyway.

E86S54
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Old 02-04-2010, 01:57 PM   #4
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One guy decided to take another job and not formerly quit the Honeywell job. he just didn't show up any longer. He also changed his phone number. His paychecks were posted automatically to his bank account.

Well it took Honeywell 2 or 3 months to figure out that the guy wasn't there anymore and to terminate him. The story is, is that he was able to keep all those extra checks.
Heh. At a company I worked for a while back, we had an employee who was generally considered a 'bad hire', close to the Dilbert strip's 'Wally'.



The hiring manager wanted him after interviewing, although no other interviewer did, so he was hired. (Cue Pointy Haired Boss...) This fellow 'went missing' after a few months, but his manager worked remotely and didn't actually notice for a while. (Yeah. That's another fun story.) Eventually attempts were made to track him down and tell him he was fired, but as I recall he collected some paychecks while informally inactive.
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Old 02-04-2010, 02:08 PM   #5
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Well I am not particularly proud of this but. My last 4 months I basically retired in place, surfed the internet, visited with old colleagues, took long lunches and came in late. I think Wally would have been proud. Not bad training for ER

I had come back from my 2nd sabbatical in Nov. my old manager offered me a crap position (something that wasn't supposed to happen after a sabbatical.) My new manager/old friend was nice about it, and I did tell her to make sure to give my stock options and raise to her staff when it came time for performance reviews.
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Old 02-04-2010, 02:35 PM   #6
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Yeah...I would get fired eventually. But I believe that if this made it to court, it would be apparent that something went wrong in the course of a few weeks after 13 years as a stellar employee.
Abandoning your position is certainly grounds for dismissal, regardless of your past excellent performance.

In any case, you no doubt have better things to do than engage in wrongful dismissal litigation. 'Retiring in place' is a better option, although not the most honourable one.

If your employer offers sabbaticals, it doesn't sound all that bad. Certainly that is a perquisite that many employees would like to have.

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Eventually attempts were made to track him down and tell him he was fired, but as I recall he collected some paychecks while informally inactive.
Pretty much the same thing happened to my namesake in the movie Office Space (Bob Porter: "I looked into it more deeply and I found that apparently what happened is that he was laid off five years ago and no one ever told him about it; but through some kind of glitch in the payroll department, he still gets a paycheck").
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Old 02-04-2010, 05:15 PM   #7
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I guess you can show up for work physically but not be productive . Kind of like that short-lived TV show "Working" (with Fred Savage) or some of the characters in "The Office"
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Old 02-04-2010, 05:45 PM   #8
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When I left my government job for mega-corp 25 years ago, I held a poll "If I didn't formally quit, how many (monthly) paychecks would I get before someone realized I was gone?" The winner was 5.
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Old 02-04-2010, 06:29 PM   #9
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So now I'm ticked off and thinking of doing just that...stop showing up at work.

Have you experienced this and or what do you believe will happen? I think it might be fun!

E86S54
Hmmm . . . so this would be a productive use of your time, notwithstanding you would continue to irritate the aggravation you already feel?

It won't work, you know. There is no way to "get back at them," or "prove a point." Vote with your feet at the appropriate time, and exit as a professional. Leave the small-minded shenanigans to folks with a lower set of standards.

-- Rita
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Old 02-04-2010, 06:58 PM   #10
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You might have to return to the professional world one day and right now Mega Corp would be able to highly recommend you based on your past work performance. It would be unfortunate IMO to burn that bridge by playing silly games that are, in the end, unlikely to change management at all.
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Old 02-04-2010, 08:47 PM   #11
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This thread reminds me of a story - Who knows if it's true - but I like the story...

I had a friend who formerly worked at Honeywell. The story is - from the friend, is that management was bad so people were leaving right and left for other jobs. One guy decided to take another job and not formerly quit the Honeywell job. he just didn't show up any longer. He also changed his phone number. His paychecks were posted automatically to his bank account.

Well it took Honeywell 2 or 3 months to figure out that the guy wasn't there anymore and to terminate him. The story is, is that he was able to keep all those extra checks.
Or, it could work out really badly, like it did for this guy.

Daily Herald | Cops: Palatine man took almost $500,000 in pay for job he never had
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Old 02-04-2010, 09:01 PM   #12
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At my Megacorp we had a pretty interesting case. I was working in network security, and one of my coworkers (young guy, decent but no work ethic) was suspected of downloading porn during his late shift. This was just after one of our regularly scheduled mega mergers, and we had new management. They were totally incompetent, eventually causing me to leave a job I loved. But in the case of the coworker, they confiscated his PC and told him to go home until they got in touch with him. Then they proceeded to totally screw up the forensics and evidence chain processes, and couldn't prove anything. So anyway, after 9 months!!! with pay, they contacted him to come in for a meeting. He'd been working at a new job for 8 months by then, so he didn't show. So they fired him and he got another month of severence pay! I met him for drinks a few weeks later after work. We laughed so hard. It was totally cathartic.
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Old 02-04-2010, 10:05 PM   #13
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So now I'm ticked off and thinking of doing just that...stop showing up at work.
Have you experienced this and or what do you believe will happen? I think it might be fun!
In the Navy it's called the ROADS program-- Retired On Active Duty Service. You hope they'll be "on temporary assignment" or "at medical" or "at personnel" or "at a retirement seminar"... anything but "at work" keeping everyone else from getting anything done.

Spouse had a command with a pointy-haired leader who was kept on travel and temporary duty for 23 out of 26 weeks. It cost the command a lot of money that they didn't really have, but they felt they'd wasted far less this way.

It also turned out that his spouse was quite happy to have him on the road too...
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Old 02-04-2010, 10:52 PM   #14
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Generally, a disproprotionately and unjustifiably small bonus is either a message that management does not want you around or that management is totally incompetent. Either way its not a good sign.

I would be careful about burning bridges on the way out. At some point you may want a reference from these people. Also, depending on the size and nature of the industry, you will not want people bad mouthing you after you have left. If you are going to stop putting in 100% at work, I would go with the retire in place approach rather than simply walk out and see how long it takes them to notice approach. Use your sick days, two hour lunches, surf the net etc - it is a lot harder to fire people for this than for simply not showing up.

Make sure you have copies of all the appriasals etc at home before you do anything. You should also make file notes of any relevant discussions.
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Old 02-04-2010, 11:16 PM   #15
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If I were going to quit and burn bridges, a no-holds-barred resignation letter, addressed to key people and saying everything I couldn't say during employment, would be a lot more satisfying than just disappearing.
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Old 02-05-2010, 04:02 AM   #16
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If I were going to quit and burn bridges, a no-holds-barred resignation letter, addressed to key people and saying everything I couldn't say during employment, would be a lot more satisfying than just disappearing.
An even safer course is to write said letter and post it on this forum. Cheaper than therapy and less risky than giving it to your former employer.
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Old 02-05-2010, 07:06 AM   #17
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I once worked where I, and 2 other co-workers were disregarded for a promotion that was given to an outsider that we then had to train. Within a couple months all three of us left. (I had worked there 13 years) This left management in a real predicament as the individual brought from outside was left by himself to run everything.

BUT we all had jobs to go to -- we did not quit and then look for work. Although two of us took temporary positions before later finding permanent ones.

So if you can find something elsse, or if you do not need an income then follow your heart. Let me tell you it felt good to all walk in and turn in our resignations.
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Old 02-05-2010, 07:37 AM   #18
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Thanks all. I don't think it is in me to just stop showing up...I was rather musing about the problems it would cause. Unfortunately my direct boss is a long time coworker and a good guy. He is just as ticked as I am

I have been showing up in body only for a while now as my retirement (or sabbatical) is imminent. Unfortunately the only ones that will actually feel my leave (in the form of experience and knowledge going out the door) will be my employees

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Old 02-05-2010, 08:00 AM   #19
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I have been showing up in body
That's a great phrase. I have to remember that one.
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Old 02-05-2010, 09:38 AM   #20
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I vote to just retire in place. Become a master of excuses. About half the folks where I work now have. It's kind of relaxing. It is a little annoying and inconvenient when the bossman bugs you to actually do something, but c'est la vie. I spend a lot of time setting up networking lunches, going to said networking lunches (often 2+ hours), job searching and applying, polishing resume, networking through email and social media, and just generally screwing around. Enough gets done where I don't get too much blowback.
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