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Old 10-04-2010, 10:00 PM   #21
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DH is only 2.5 years older than me so I can't really relate. However, I have to agree with the other posters that these days, most men in their early twenties are very immature.

My only word of caution to your DD is to make sure that she and her boyfriend are on the same page regarding what they want from this relationship long-term, etc. In my extended family, there have been a few marriages where the man has been 10+ years older and 1) either the marriage lasted only for the sake of the children (and now that the kids are grown up and on their own, both husband and wife have grown apart and are pretty much living in the same house but separate lives); or 2) the wife felt pressured to have kids right away because the husband was pushing 40, etc. Three kids later and the wife wants a divorce because she felt she was cheated out of her youth, etc. While her friends were living the single life and establishing careers, dating, etc., she had three kids before she was 30 and resented the husband. Did not end well....

Just my two cents

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Old 10-05-2010, 12:38 AM   #22
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Just had a niece do the same thing.... but they got married a few months ago.... so no long term info on that...

My sister was 16 when she met her DH... he was separated with two kids and 22... both are retiring this year... sis is 54 and he 60... had two kids of their own...

My wife is 11 years younger... a few bumps in the road at the beginning, but things have worked themselves out.... been married two years... for me, first marriage so that could be some of the problems

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Old 10-05-2010, 08:23 AM   #23
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Sounds like a hunk to me!

Brother has finally married his girlfriend of long standing. He is 12 years her senior. They've decided to start a family.

Retired since summer 1999.
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Old 10-05-2010, 09:40 AM   #24
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My parents were 12 years apart, married when my Mom was 19, Dad 31. They stayed married for 42 years until the passing of my Dad. They had a wonderful marriage.
"If it didn't have bones in it, it wouldn't be crunchy now, would it?" -M. Python

Age 50, DW is 54, 1.4M split 25 Stock, 40 Mutual Funds, 25 Bonds, 5 Commodities, 5 REIT. Own Home, no debts.
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Old 10-05-2010, 09:47 AM   #25
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I have always dated older men so I understand her point of view. BUT,,,, Married one 13 years older after knowing him for 6 months....bad idea He rushed me into marriage because he was afraid I might change my mind...duh..... Make sure they spend plenty of time before making any long term decisions. Dated a Vietnam Veteran very early on and broke it off about 6 months into the relationship. Didn't know what PTSD was at the time but know now that he had it bad. Again, don't rush. Finally this time I married a man 9 years older than me. Best decision I ever made. We have been together 21 years now but only married for 4. Made really sure that I knew this one!

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.<br />-Robert A. Heinlein
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Old 10-05-2010, 11:41 AM   #26
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Looking at the title, she could have been dating a 12 year old... count your blessings T-Al!

Anyway, DW and I are just over a year apart - but there are certainly more important things in a relationship, and I know a few happy couples with a 10 year delta. She probably needs to proceed with just a small extra bit of caution - there is just a big difference in life experiences between the two, but it's just that, a difference, not good or bad.

As you know, all you can do is trust her and listen for any clues one way or the other.

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Old 10-05-2010, 12:27 PM   #27
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10 years diffenence is all in the age. An 18 year old dating an 8 year old, well, enough said! However, no one would blink an eye at a 72 year old and a 62 year old. There are, I would think, a lot more things to worry about. Religion, financial since, debt, spending habits, desire for kids, ability to be away from family, ability to cope with spouse being gone. Good thing he is a 32 year old Major with most likely less than 10 years to go in the service, and as noted on this board, Military Retirees do all right in FIRE.
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Old 10-05-2010, 09:38 PM   #28
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Originally Posted by Khan View Post
A todos los amantes del mundo. No importa el color de su piel, la pasion es universal.

La tavola e il letto non hanno restrizioni.
Any day your on this side of the grass is a good day.
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Old 10-06-2010, 06:35 AM   #29
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Im almost 9 years older than my wife. And we got married 6 years ago. I look much older than her.
I get by with a little help from my friends....ta ta ta ta ta...
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Old 10-06-2010, 09:16 AM   #30
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I hate to admit this, but I don't think age matters until you get old. I've been happily married for 40 years and DH is 4.5 years older. I'm 63 and if I were out looking for a husband today, I'd never look at anyone over 55. I hope I never have to be looking, but if I did.........

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