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A Father's Love
Old 11-27-2012, 02:25 PM   #1
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A Father's Love

Do you sometimes feel inclined to send a letter like this. I don't have grown children yet but I can certainly see how disappointmens can break a parents heart.

'I am bitterly, bitterly disappointed': retired naval officer's email to children in full - Telegraph
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Old 11-27-2012, 02:29 PM   #2
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Do you sometimes feel inclined to send a letter like this.
Thankfully no.
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Old 11-27-2012, 02:30 PM   #3
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His kids are in their late 30's, one is 40. Isn't he a bit late?
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Old 11-27-2012, 02:36 PM   #4
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My kids are still in school... so there's time for me to get his state of mind.

My dad, under similar circumstances, would have written a similar letter. (And did... to a sibling.)
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Old 11-27-2012, 02:47 PM   #5
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Maybe he bears some responsibility for bringing up three kids with such poor values.
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Old 11-27-2012, 02:50 PM   #6
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The truth often hurts...

And get off my lawn!
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Old 11-27-2012, 02:56 PM   #7
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The letter was written by a retired nuclear submarine captain. Hmmm, aren't there a bunch if retired submariners here? I'm not saying a word more 'bout this.
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Old 11-27-2012, 03:04 PM   #8
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He sounds like a complete d***head.
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Old 11-27-2012, 03:25 PM   #9
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He sounds like a complete d***head.
Yep. ...IMO not so much for venting his feelings, but enabling his message to his children to be read by anyone/everyone.
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Old 11-27-2012, 03:27 PM   #10
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His kids are in their late 30's, one is 40. Isn't he a bit late?

Sounds to me like he is telling them to stop whining to their mother for their bad decisions....

It is not always the parents fault their kids make bad or stupid decisions.... everybody has their own personalities.... not all driven by how they were brought up....
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Old 11-27-2012, 03:29 PM   #11
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So everyone else is expected to live their lives according to his wishes? What a douchebag.
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Old 11-27-2012, 03:37 PM   #12
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His kids are in their late 30's, one is 40. Isn't he a bit late?

Sounds to me like he is telling them to stop whining to their mother for their bad decisions....

It is not always the parents fault their kids make bad or stupid decisions.... everybody has their own personalities.... not all driven by how they were brought up....
My only point was that if the children were not making good choices that would have been evident much earlier. With stories like this we know only what we read in the media (very little and one-dimensional), and then leap to judge.

Welcome to another episode of "Trial by Media"
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Old 11-27-2012, 03:40 PM   #13
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From a story linked to the article, the 40 year old daughter defends him and says it was the kick up the backside she needed (love those Brits).

I can read between the lines in his email that the mom was no doubt distraught after a gathering and the email was dad's solution. As if the 35+ y/o kids are living their lives to either hurt or bless the folks so they can brag about them to their friends (get over it, mom and dad). Wonder which kid passed it on and to whom (no doubt one of the copulating partners dad refers to) so it went viral. I see a movie based on these parents and their slacker kids.
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Old 11-27-2012, 03:40 PM   #14
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Sounds to me like he is telling them to stop whining to their mother for their bad decisions....

It is not always the parents fault their kids make bad or stupid decisions.... everybody has their own personalities.... not all driven by how they were brought up....
Agreed. The same home can raise vastly different children. There's an element of nature that's sometimes nuture cannot cancel.
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Old 11-27-2012, 03:45 PM   #15
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I see a movie based on these parents and their slacker kids.
Rocket Gibraltar Rocket Gibraltar (1988) - IMDb
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An old patriarch unites for his birthday all members of his family. But the group of people is full of personal and social problems.
An excellent film.
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Old 11-27-2012, 03:47 PM   #16
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A totally self indulgent idiot, who did not deserve to have children.

I write my kids letters to tell them how proud I am of them, and how much I appreciate being their father. I think this would be true even if they were not as successful as they are, and not as unfailingly considerate of their parents. Grown children prove that a chain of good things happened. Plenty of opportunities to get snuffed before adulthood.

And blaming them for divorces is idiotic. He just shot himself in the foot. Being critical of adult children is like telling a woman you are dating that she should change her lipstick shade. It can't help, and it will very likely hurt. Adults are not compelled to like you, just because you are their father or mother.

Ha
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Old 11-27-2012, 03:50 PM   #17
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I do not have problems like the writer of the article has. No would I write something like that. But I do understand to some extent. Children and Adult children will do what they will in spite of how they were raised or taught. Often their children will suffer and its left up to the Grandparents to deal with it.
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Old 11-27-2012, 06:18 PM   #18
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From a story linked to the article, the 40 year old daughter defends him and says it was the kick up the backside she needed (love those Brits).

I can read between the lines in his email that the mom was no doubt distraught after a gathering and the email was dad's solution. As if the 35+ y/o kids are living their lives to either hurt or bless the folks so they can brag about them to their friends (get over it, mom and dad). Wonder which kid passed it on and to whom (no doubt one of the copulating partners dad refers to) so it went viral. I see a movie based on these parents and their slacker kids.
This was my thought too - the mom was upset over the kids latest problems.

Having had a sibling who kept coming back for emergency bailouts (financial) well into his forties... But never took responsibility for the messes he got in... I get where a parent can say "enough".

I didn't agree with my dad's handling of things - but I understood how he got there.
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Old 11-27-2012, 06:21 PM   #19
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Rocket Gibraltar Rocket Gibraltar (1988) - IMDb
An excellent film.
An old patriarch unites for his birthday all members of his family. But the group of people is full of personal and social problems. There was a Twilight Zone episode like this. It ended badly for the children.
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Old 11-27-2012, 06:27 PM   #20
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An old patriarch unites for his birthday all members of his family. But the group of people is full of personal and social problems. There was a Twilight Zone episode like this. It ended badly for the children.
Was this the one with the masks?
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