Child-free study: FYI

[CuppaJoe]

....

If you don't have kids, who's going to mow the grass when you are lazy?

The apt. bldg. maintenance staff.

 

[ziggy29]

The apt. bldg. maintenance staff.

Uh-oh. Here comes "rent versus own" now....

 

[scrabbler1]

My route to ER was this: No kids, no debts. I knew since I was 20 years old I never wanted any kids of my own. But I like doing volunteer work with kids, especially when I get to "give them back" to their parents when I am done putting smiles on their faces.

Nearly 1 in 5 now? I hope this trend continues to 1 in 4, 1 in 3......the stigma is fading fast.

And in my co-op apartment complex (own my apartment outright - no debts), the building's maintenance staff and their outside contractors cut the grass and do all the other grounds maintenance work.

 

[FUEGO]

You people have to pay building maintenance staff to mow grass? That's what kids are for.

 

[Khan]

I didn't like kids when I was one. Never wanted or had any. Have lived with varying amounts of cats (down to 1).
Have been told I'm 'selfish' for not reproducing. I'm sure the world is poorer for one less messed up kid.

 

[Purron]

Have been told I'm 'selfish' for not reproducing.

Many years ago, someone told me the same thing. Sometimes people choose to have children for selfish reasons. Sometimes people choose not to for unselfish reasons. Vice versa on both.

Oh, and some people think retiring early is selfish too:

http://www.early-retirement.org/forums/f29/proposition-early-retirement-is-selfish-31851.html

 

[travelover]

Many years ago, someone told me the same thing. Sometimes people choose to have children for selfish reasons. Sometimes people choose not to for unselfish reasons. Vice versa on both.

Oh, and some people think retiring early is selfish too:

http://www.early-retirement.org/forums/f29/proposition-early-retirement-is-selfish-31851.html

I'm [-]selfish[/-] doomed. I retired early and have no kids!

 

[haha]

I just made a poll on this. http://www.early-retirement.org/forums/f27/kids-or-not-50863.html#post951550

 

[Westernskies]

Forgot to have kids, never saw it as a big deal, or felt any real "stigma" over not having them. Have heard a few snarky comments around "no kids, no bills" or "they have lots of time, they don't have kids" but always just considered the source- usually these comments come fromm the same folks who don't LBYM and are in hock up to their necks playing keep up with the Jones. It wouldn't have made any difference to their finances, they would be in the same position, with or without kids, IMO. As for their time, that is the choice they made...

 

[Khan]

Many years ago, someone told me the same thing. Sometimes people choose to have children for selfish reasons. Sometimes people choose not to for unselfish reasons. Vice versa on both.

Oh, and some people think retiring early is selfish too:

http://www.early-retirement.org/forums/f29/proposition-early-retirement-is-selfish-31851.html

Oh yes. I have been condemned for being childfree & RE & not religious.

 

[brewer12345]

Any comments from the "quiverfull" crowd?

 

[scrabbler1]

Oh yes. I have been condemned for being childfree & RE & not religious.

I have been bingoed (sometimes) for being childfree.

I have been envied for being retired at age 45.

I have been treated indifferently (thankfully) for being an atheist.

 

[Leonidas]

Any comments from the "quiverfull" crowd?

Not me, I have better ways to waste time. Besides, all I keep thinking about is the opening scenes from Idiocracy - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

YouTube - Clip

I wouldn't condemn anyone for their reproductive choice - as long as they keep it in the human family and it's not otherwise illegal, go for whatever you want. Or stay away from whatever you don't want. Except those people who got sterilized so they could "reduce their carbon footprint".

 

[ziggy29]

I have been treated indifferently (thankfully) for being an atheist.

Although I am an unabashed and unashamed Christian, and although I know some folks "of the faith" think it's my responsibility to [-]whack the Bible over everyone's head[/-] "convert" or preach it from the rooftops to everyone else, I can't and won't do that. I will happily share with those who ask, with those who are exploring and curious, with those whom I know to be receptive to listening... but I cringe every time I see someone aggressively trying to put their religion on others whether they want it or not. I'm tired of putting up with the reputation that brings. Some of these people need to read a little more of the gospels and a little less on the Old Testament vengeance and judgmentalism.

That concludes this threadjacking. Back to the original idea... I was pleasantly surprised when we moved to a small, conservative and fairly religious town that the attitude toward us not having children is mostly a non-issue, and at most a curiosity.

 

[Purron]

Oh yes. I have been condemned for being childfree & RE & not religious.

You offered to donate your bone marrow to someone you don't know, are in the 20 gallon club for blood donations and are kind to animals. The world could use more people like you.

 

[ziggy29]

You offered to donate your bone marrow to someone you don't know, are in the 20 gallon club for blood donations and are kind to animals. The world could use more people like you.

Sometimes we get so wrapped up in labels and pigeonholing that we forget that just being a good person is vastly underrated.

 

[Khan]

Sometimes we get so wrapped up in labels and pigeonholing that we forget that just being a good person is vastly underrated.

Something like that

 

[Gumby]

Last Sunday at church, the conversation went something like this:

Gumby -- "Happy Father's Day, Chuck"

Chuck (the 30 something dad of two very nice young daughters) -- "Happy Fath . . . you two have kids right?"

Gumby -- "Nope"

Chuck -- "I'm sorry"

Gumby -- "I'm not"


It just sort of ended up that we never had any kids. When we first got married we assumed we would have them, but we never got around to it. I am happy with my life the way it is now and I'm pleased when others are happy with their own lives. Based on my observation, young Chuck is a great dad who enjoys his family immensely. He is precisely the sort of guy who should be a dad.

 

[travelover]

The only time I really felt a chill when I revealed that I was kid-less was when I spent a little time in Kenya. I guess that in their culture childless people are not respected.

 

[kumquat]

Shouldn't this be a WTFC thread?

People who want kids are probably happier with them. People who don't want them are probably happier without them. The only downside I can see is for the kids who have parents who don't want them.

The only time we joked about regrets over having them was the timing. Many of our friends got married "because they had to". We were in our 30's when ours arrived and those friends didn't need to change diapers, find babysitters or do any of the less appealing parental tasks.

Disclaimer: We have one of each. I'd probably be just as happy if we had none, but I've really liked them since they arrived.

 

[bbbamI]

Last Sunday at church, the conversation went something like this:

Gumby -- "Happy Father's Day, Chuck"

Chuck (the 30 something dad of two very nice young daughters) -- "Happy Fath . . . you two have kids right?"

Gumby -- "Nope"

Chuck -- "I'm sorry"

Gumby -- "I'm not"


It just sort of ended up that we never had any kids. When we first got married we assumed we would have them, but we never got around to it. I am happy with my life the way it is now and I'm pleased when others are happy with their own lives. Based on my observation, young Chuck is a great dad who enjoys his family immensely. He is precisely the sort of guy who should be a dad.

Mmmm, hmmm..for years I've been asked when I'm going to have children. They just knew I'd change my mind. Finally the folks that know me realized I was not going to be a mom and the sad faces disappeared.

Now, people that don't know me ask if I have grandchildren.

....btw...congrats to the people that choose to have, adopt or foster a child/children.

 

[mh]

Here's my newest dog that found me on the road a month or so ago--her name is Biscuit and she looks, well, as best I can describe it, she's like a miniature Border Collie, even though no such thing exists. I've had suggestions of Pom and Papillon and some other guesses, but who knows. She's 14 lbs and adorable!

Maximum cuteness !

 

[Walt34]

YouTube - Clip

Suspicions confirmed.

When I first started with the police department there was one "problem area" near a beer & wine store where the young'uns would congregate to drink beer. Later some of them started showing up with babies on their hips, some of those, no doubt, conceived in that same parking lot. And then those kids started having their social life drinking beer in the parking lot.

Apparently Darwinian rules have been modified by civilization....

 

[Bestwifeever]

I love that movie, dumb as it might be. Like Vonnegut's Player Piano, it might predict the future.

But interestingly, the study above shows more highly educated women are more likely today to have children than they were 30 years ago (of course, as at the end of Idiocracy, they are probably having only one or two vs. the great unwashed having half a dozen):

...A very small group — the most highly educated — is bucking that trend.
In 2008, 9% of women in the USA had a master's, doctorate or professional degree; of that group, 24% had not had children, down from 31% of the same group in 1994, the Pew analysis reports today.

"The most educated women are still the most likely to be childless," says report co-author D'Vera Cohn. "It's just that the rates have come down."

 

[kramer]

I like to play games with kids and actually engage with them (I guess because I don't spend much time with kids), and I have had multiple people approach me and tell me I would be a good father. Girlfriends have said the same thing. I am now 44 and single and childless.

When I was in my 30s, I interviewed a number of people about their experiences with kids. Why did they choose to have them, were they happy, any regrets, etc. I didn't really encounter anyone with regrets. But nothing they ever said really made me change my mind. I thought that when I met someone I really loved that my mind would change about it and I would want to have kids with that person, but that simply was not the case.

That being said, I find the thought of having children downright scary. And the thought of taking care of a baby I can't even imagine.

It's the main reason I never married. Also, most women want kids. So not only do you have less of a reason to get married, but the potential population of mates understandably discounts you when you don't want to reproduce with them.

However, I am so happy that many folks do like to have kids. I think an aging society and especially a decreasing population are negative trends. I honestly wish I was not contributing to it.