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View Poll Results: Do you or do you not have children? Poll
Never wanted kids, have no kids 59 37.82%
Never wanted kids, but, surprise! had kids 2 1.28%
Wanted kids and had one 23 14.74%
Wanted kids and had two 48 30.77%
Wanted kids and had three 15 9.62%
Wanted kids..but had too many (over 3)! 4 2.56%
No kids of my own but mate did have young (-18) kids 1 0.64%
No kids of my own and mate's kids are out of the house 4 2.56%
Multiple Choice Poll. Voters: 156. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 02-27-2008, 08:16 PM   #41
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No children here. We waffled back and forth for a while in our 30's, but eventually decided it wasn't right for us.
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Old 02-27-2008, 08:20 PM   #42
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We have one child, 19 months old. If it were up to me we'd have one more. If it were up to the wife we'd have two or four or five more. I guess we'll have to see who wins out in that one. God, I hope it's me.
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Old 02-27-2008, 08:52 PM   #43
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No kids, didn't want any. Was afraid I'd get one like me.
I didn't have kids for the same reason, albeit my wife would have made a great mom.
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Old 02-27-2008, 08:53 PM   #44
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Was afraid I'd get one like me.
That's what happened to us. Even worse, we got the female version of me.

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Old 02-27-2008, 09:32 PM   #45
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As a child-free individual I am surprised by the number of other individuals who responded as I did. It seems in my "real" life that there are few other individuals who have made a similar decision. Fortunately, I'm finally reaching the age where people no longer try to convince me that I'll change my mind.

Although I can't recall a time when I ever wanted to be a parent my specific reasons for not wanting to procreate have changed over the years. Finances were never really the primary motivating factor but I must admit that when I listen to friends bemoan the cost of day care/braces/college/etc. I'm rather glad that my extra money is going towards retirement.
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Old 02-27-2008, 09:41 PM   #46
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Yeah, red, we may outnumber them in this crowd, but certainly not at the Wal-Mart!
Older you get, the less people hassle you about it. Even had a friend with three tell me this past weekend that she admired me for "not just having kids to do what everyone else was doing"!
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Old 02-27-2008, 09:44 PM   #47
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As a child-free individual I am surprised by the number of other individuals who responded as I did. It seems in my "real" life that there are few other individuals who have made a similar decision. Fortunately, I'm finally reaching the age where people no longer try to convince me that I'll change my mind.

Although I can't recall a time when I ever wanted to be a parent my specific reasons for not wanting to procreate have changed over the years. Finances were never really the primary motivating factor but I must admit that when I listen to friends bemoan the cost of day care/braces/college/etc. I'm rather glad that my extra money is going towards retirement.
The high percentage of responders who don't have children is a pleasant surprise. I grew up in a society where not having children was viewed as "selfish" so this is refreshing. My motives are not financial. I like kids in small doses but am always glad when they leave.

One of my work colleagues has several children from two failed marriages, one of which involved bankruptcy. She believes she can never retire.
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Old 02-27-2008, 09:53 PM   #48
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The high percentage of responders who don't have children is a pleasant surprise. I grew up in a society where not having children was viewed as "selfish" so this is refreshing. My motives are not financial. I like kids in small doses but am always glad when they leave.

One of my work colleagues has several children from two failed marriages, one of which involved bankruptcy. She believes she can never retire.
The main reason why I didn't want children was because I am selfish. I have enough to go around for my spouse and myself. Im one of those people who will admit. " Hey I would probably make a sucky parent" My nieces and nephews,god children are all awesome though
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Old 02-27-2008, 11:49 PM   #49
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Older you get, the less people hassle you about it.
In our case, it seems like the older we get, and the farther we get from the time consuming responsibilities and enormous expenses of raising the family, the more our child-free friends are inviting us back into their lives. We're no longer the couple who arrives at the dinner party with an infant and a diaper bag, who can't join the old gang on a cruise because those dollars are going into a college fund, who is inappropriately preoccupied by child caused worries at social events, who can't go out and party on a weekday night because we'll be up at dawn with the kids, etc!

We'll never catch up financially with our child-free friends, but as empty nesters it's nice to have the time to get invited back into the social relationships and activities again.
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Old 02-28-2008, 01:14 AM   #50
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Actually, I think that having a child contributed greatly to my FIRE. Saved a little while she was young but not that much, since she cost a lot, what with paid coaches, stylish clothes, and all the things that a daughter requires ( I believe that boys are much cheaper to raise). Anyway, once she left the nest, we suddenly found a lot of paycheck left at the end of the month, and put that in the retirement fund. Smart investing, and lifetime of living within the paycheck at that time, produced a rapidly growing nest egg, that allowed for FIRE. Wonder if having grandkids will have a similar multiplier effect?
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Old 02-28-2008, 07:12 AM   #51
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As a child-free individual I am surprised by the number of other individuals who responded as I did. It seems in my "real" life that there are few other individuals who have made a similar decision. Fortunately, I'm finally reaching the age where people no longer try to convince me that I'll change my mind.
I agree, it's getting easier as I get older. People are still surprised that we don't have kids. However, I've also noticed I am getting pressured less by others to change my mind.

We had few friends without kids for a while, and I'll admit it was really, really lonely. Seemed none of our friends (with kids) had time to go out to dinner, etc. I found a social group specifically for people who haven't had kids (either by choice or b/c you couldn't have children), and it was awesome. We made so many great friends! We have since moved from the area but have remained friends with several couples and still get together with them at least once a year. I still maintain email contact with my best friend on a daily basis. We have agreed that if we end up alone without our husbands or family someday that we will work out arrangements to live near each other and generally try to take care of each other.
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Old 02-28-2008, 07:26 AM   #52
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Children were definetely my motivator to save. When I realized I was totally responsible for two tiny children I got my act together and started saving .
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Old 02-28-2008, 08:00 AM   #53
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Wanted 3, had 2, third never came along. We have a son and a daugther. As much as I am looking forward to FIRE, I would not trade them for ANYTHING in the world, including FIRE. Son is 20 and is a missionary, daughter is 16.

Last nite at an awards ceremony at her school, DD came and wrapped her arms around me and snuggled for a brief moment right in front of her friends, almost as if to say to her friends, "look, this is my dad, and I love him". These are the moments that are precious. I know some teens don't get along with their folks, and some folks don't get along with their teens. Sometimes when I see things written about how rough the teenage years were for the parents, I wonder what we must have done differently, or why we have been so blessed to not have such problems. Perhaps I should be looking for some wood to knock right about now...

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Old 02-28-2008, 08:29 AM   #54
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Wanted one kid, had twins. I think I will keep both. They are now 11.
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Old 02-28-2008, 08:49 AM   #55
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Have four; all grown, gone and married. Four grandkids who make it all worth the ride.
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Old 02-28-2008, 08:55 AM   #56
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No one yet admitting to a surprise kid they didn't want...must mean the buyer's regret fades with time! LOL!
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I'm sure most are sincere when they say it, but I've known a few parents who will quietly and secretly admit they wish they didn't have any (even if they do love their children). In this child-centered society where everything is sold as being "for the children," saying you wish you didn't have the kids you have is tantamount to kicking puppies and could get CPS at your door, or so it seems.
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Old 02-28-2008, 09:05 AM   #57
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I'm sure most are sincere when they say it, but I've known a few parents who will quietly and secretly admit they wish they didn't have any (even if they do love their children).
You've been talking to Britney Spears mom, haven't you?
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Old 02-28-2008, 09:14 AM   #58
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Oh, meant to say SORRY to those that wanted kids and just have not had them. WHY I would forget that category, I have no idea, since I have a cousin who is 40 and just married a younger stud to have kids...but nothing after 3-1/2 years. I think she is starting to panic now.
How could I have forgotten that category? Mea culpa.
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Old 02-28-2008, 11:25 AM   #59
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Similar to Caroline, my life hasn't led down that path. Granted, I was leaning toward not having kids, but with the right guy, I would have had one or two. But college, the CFA exams, a failed marriage, and few long term relationships that didn't end in marriage, and now I am almost 39. No kids for me.

I love being an aunt to my sister's two adopted daughters, and an "honorary" aunt to several of my good friends' kids.
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Old 02-28-2008, 12:13 PM   #60
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Another child-free person here, although I've been married 30 years. We wanted to wait until we were emotionally and finacially ready and by the time that came, we realized we were happy with our lives as they were. Never regretted the decision (although I wish I han't waited until I as 40 to get my first cat!).
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