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Old 05-28-2009, 09:00 AM   #21
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When my kids were small I bought a backyard pool and started the installation. The grass being ripped out was a dead give a way and my neighbor approached me and said he didn't want the filter near his house because of the noise. Filters are actually pretty quite but I obliged and put the filter on the opposite side of the pool. About a week later I get a certified letter from his attorney stating that pools require a permit, That I hadn't obtained one, and that I would need to remove the pool. What appeared to be a copy of the city ordinance was included and sure enough according to the ordinance I had violated the rules. Since pools are pretty common in the area and none of my other neighbors had obtained a permit I do a little research and find the official copy of the ordinace for pools. It reads exactly the same as the one in the letter exceapt the one mailed to me was missing the first sentence which read,"All pools above four feet must conform to the following etc. etc. My four foot pool is now in full compliance and he probably stole some attorney's letterhead and conveinantly left out the first sentence. That pool lasted fifteen years where I encouraged my children to use the pool screaming and splashing as loud as possible. He never once opened a window in the summer, just ran the air for fifteen years.
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Old 05-28-2009, 09:10 AM   #22
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...That pool lasted fifteen years where I encouraged my children to use the pool screaming and splashing as loud as possible. He never once opened a window in the summer, just ran the air for fifteen years.
Ooooooohhhh, we think alike. On the opposite side of the Pine Tree massacre scene...
I had a neighbor (renters) whose teenage kid and friends loved to play rap and headbanger music at very high volume when the parents were gone, which was most of the time.
So, being the schemer and plotter that I am, I arranged to have my outdoor porch Bose speakers cranking out Beethoven, Tchaikovsky, and definitely some Pavarotti opera highlights whenever the parents were home and they were all outside on their back patio.
The parents asked me about my classical music volume one time. I pretty much told them if I had to listen to their kid's rap music, then they ALL had to listen to my classical.
Guess what problem stopped ?

This family was eventually evicted for non-payment of rent. I found out later they destroyed the inside of the house. Current owners are having it all torn out and redone as I type this.
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Old 05-28-2009, 10:42 AM   #23
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I guess I'll add my neighborhood story to the list.
My son plays drums in a small time school buddy type rock band.
They normally play/practice in a room I built for them in my garage. Never had a complaint.
The group decided to play at a community fund raiser for cancer patients.
Which I thought was a great thing to do.
The show/event was to be held outside at a high school football stadium. So the band wanted to do a good practice session out side to adjust there sound equipment for an out door setting, which I approved to be done in my driveway entering the garage. During the day no less around noon.
Well somebody in the neighborhood didn't like the idea to much. The wife and I were at work at the time this all went down. When wife gets home the police are basically waiting in our driveway. The male and female police officers start questioning her (my wife) about some car load of teenagers mooning the city councilman that lives in our hood. Which the wife has no knowledge of. By this time a nosy neighbor is on the scene but actually helps us out by telling the police my son had not left the house. Which cleared him, Thank God !!! I can't imagine any of the band members doing such a thing as they left my neighborhood, can you ?
Turns out the council member had come down to my place by himself and personally made the guys stop playing loud music because somebody in the hood had called him and complained. Instead of calling the police as he should have. Anyway, as the other band members left my home they saw the councilman in his yard and one of them decided to show their a$$ to him literally.
The two police officers couldn't even keep a straight face while they talked to my wife about it .
I saw and spoke to the male officer a night or two later. I mentioned that for the right price I could probably get the boys to moon the mayor if they were interested. Of course he just smiled and had no comment.
Hope I was able to convey the story good enough for you folks to get a laugh. But we definitely cracked up about it.
I did tell the guilty young man, if he decided to show his a$$ anytime in the future, to please do it in his own neighborhood though.
Hope you enjoyed,
Steve
PS. I called City Hall and let the police department know they would be practicing the next day. Informed them it was for the community fund raiser. They told me it would be just fine because the noise ordinance didn't start until 8:00 pm. I was there the next day and had them turn it up extra loud. When the police showed up I told them I had cleared it with city hall. He told me he didn't see anything wrong with what they were doing. Listened to them play a song or two and left.
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Old 05-28-2009, 10:51 AM   #24
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Great story!
I felt sorry for the cops trying their darnedest to be serious about this whole thing.
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Old 05-28-2009, 10:59 AM   #25
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Great story!
I felt sorry for the cops trying their darnedest to be serious about this whole thing.

I could just picture us sitting in court.
The lawyer asking the councilman.
Now just exactly what did you see, Mr. Councilman
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Old 05-28-2009, 11:01 AM   #26
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I could just picture us sitting in court.
The lawer asking the councilman.
Now just exactly what did you see, Mr. Councilman
The "Tallywacker" scene in the Principal's office from the movie Porky's just popped into my head.
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Old 05-28-2009, 11:10 AM   #27
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I could just picture us sitting in court.
The lawyer asking the councilman.
Now just exactly what did you see, Mr. Councilman
Patient sees "sex" in every inkblot and says, "you're the one drawing the dirty pictures." At 1:30:

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Old 05-28-2009, 12:23 PM   #28
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One of our neighbors is a new owner (bought in 2006 ... right at the peak). Decided to spend 13k clear cutting what he thought was his lot. THEN the surveyor was hired only to find out NONE of the 30-40 mature trees were his.

We actually made out on the deal ... a dead basswood alone would have cost me 3k to remove. We never knew where line was. Always wanted a fence. So I told him "It's spilt milk, leave me the cord wood." He was planning to sell the cord wood ... now it's mine. And DW put a fence on the line he paid to survey. We're all set.

No so lucky with the guy on the other side ... he sued. 3 years later the liability company settles. Now his fence is going up and it cuts down this fools driveway. These guys can't stand each other (something I've managed to avoid).
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Old 05-28-2009, 05:10 PM   #29
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I had one of these irritating next door neighbors too. It was just constantly something he was griping and complaining about, never to me, always made a point to aproach the wife when I wasnt home and berated her to no end. Made life absolutely miserable for my whole family.

Our houses were fairly close together, had no garages, and the edge of his short driveway was right at our property line. I tried to be the better person and turned the other cheek as long as I could until I couldnt take it anymore.

Bought a bunch of bird houses from a state agency for a rare and endangered species of bird, and erected them the entire length of his driveway just on my side of the property line. Of course the entry hole to the bird houses faced his driveway. And I attracted a LOT of birds (I mean a LOT) with the feeders I kept full near the bird houses.

Ever felt like your car was a magnet for bird droppings? You havent seen nothing compared to the mess these birds made for this guy and his car EVERY single day. This guy was washing his car every other day in a losing battle to keep the bird dirt from covering his car. It probably really griped him when he continually received the many thank you letters that the state accidentally sent to his address on a regular basis for helping to provide shelter to these birds.
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Old 05-28-2009, 05:29 PM   #30
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...Bought a bunch of bird houses from a state agency for a rare and endangered species of bird, and erected them the entire length of his driveway just on my side of the property line. Of course the entry hole to the bird houses faced his driveway. And I attracted a LOT of birds (I mean a LOT) with the feeders I kept full near the bird houses.

Ever felt like your car was a magnet for bird droppings? You havent seen nothing compared to the mess these birds made for this guy and his car EVERY single day. This guy was washing his car every other day in a losing battle to keep the bird dirt from covering his car. It probably really griped him when he continually received the many thank you letters that the state accidentally sent to his address on a regular basis for helping to provide shelter to these birds.
This is an award winner.
I have pretty good neighbors now, but I'm tucking this one in my back pocket for future reference. I have a wooden stockade fence that the young couple next door has started a habit of leaning their junk up against. The fence is not on the property line and there is 24 inches of maintenance room for me to use.
When their house is done being re-sided, I will move their stuff over next to their garage. A real project I need to do is powerwash the fence in prep for staining, and I will put several WET PAINT signs on my fence. I may forget to take the signs down. Oops!
It rains enough here so they will never know if it's really wet from stain or wet from rain. This could go on for months.

The birdboxes would be plan B if they start leaning their junk up against the fence again.
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Old 05-28-2009, 06:34 PM   #31
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Say Whiplash, a darn good idea.

What was that endangered bird? Would they thrive in SW PA. You gave me a splendid idea.
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Old 05-28-2009, 09:44 PM   #32
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Say Whiplash, a darn good idea.

What was that endangered bird? Would they thrive in SW PA. You gave me a splendid idea.

This was quite a while ago not sure I really remember accuarately. Baywick Wren is what I think it was.

The recomendation was to put the bird houses at a height of 5 to 15 feet. Putting them near the upper height limit helped deter my neighbor from any effective counter-measures. Also, it was recomended that I take measures to ensure that the birdhouses werent used by common wrens or other non-threatened species, which I disregarded. I was happy to have any, and as many, birds of any species as I could get in the birdhouses.
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Old 05-28-2009, 09:55 PM   #33
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Whenever I need cheering up, I go to this forum and read about "Home Disasters" Home Disasters - GardenWeb . I'm always particularly horrified by the "Neighbor from Hell" posts and the amount of crap some people have to deal with. Thankfully, all our neighbors are the "wave and mind my own beeswax" types.
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Old 05-29-2009, 05:14 AM   #34
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Thanks Whiplash. Seems there are a dozen or so endangered winged creatures in our area, some large some small, as listed by the conservation department DCNR. Now just need to make a proper selection. Got to save them birds.
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Old 05-29-2009, 06:39 AM   #35
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Thanks Whiplash. Seems there are a dozen or so endangered winged creatures in our area, some large some small, as listed by the conservation department DCNR. Now just need to make a proper selection. Got to save them birds.
There's a sinister plot afoot here...PLEASE keep us posted.
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Old 05-29-2009, 06:53 AM   #36
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But of course. First we'll see what sort of fence goes up, then look at the endangered bird population see which is most in need. Then get the the optimal bird house size with just the right size entryway, place said bird adobes at just the right height and orientation.

See, we have three car garage, holds all of our wheels. Our meticulous neighbor has 4 vehicles religiously washed twice a week and waxed weekly. And no garage.

We aim to please.
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Old 05-29-2009, 10:37 PM   #37
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We aim to please.
Or rather, the birds will aim where they please...
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Old 05-30-2009, 09:05 AM   #38
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Funny. Most here complain to having bad neighbors, but nobody admits to being a bad neighbor. Is this the Lake Wobegon of neighbors, or are all really above average? I'm pretty sure we could qualify on both counts. Things often depend on one's point of view.

HFWR has the right though - bad neighbors are a sure sign of insufficient sharing of alcoholic beverages.
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Old 05-30-2009, 09:36 AM   #39
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I'm sure in my perfectionist neighbor's opinion we are the Beverly Hillbillies' uncouth cousins. On the other side, the lumberjack thinks, finally some people with kindred spirits and common sense (or so he says).

The PO was also a perfectionist. Unfortunately the stuff I had to fix proved he did not know function from form, or what functional needs must be met first, before making it look perfect.

At the time of initial look DW gave away substantial negotiating power by upon entering, started arranging the furniture, discussing drapery and gushing about the wonderful kitchen. In spite of me not five minutes before getting to the house saying: even if it is the best thing you ever seen, don't say it, just be non-committal. Excitement costs money. Well, I lost that one.
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Old 05-30-2009, 08:19 PM   #40
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The WET PAINT signs were purchased today. See post #30.
All I have to do is relocate their junk away from the fence back onto their property, mow a path for myself, trim the grass next to the fence, then do some powerwashing. Maybe I'll spill a little stain on the ground, staple the signs to the fence, and we're off to the races.
It's going to be rainy off and on this week, so I'm all set. The first nice day, the signs are going up. I may lean a long handled paintroller covered with plastic up against the fence where they can see it. Like I forgot to bring it in when I was "done" staining. <snicker>
In case anyone is wondering, I will remain on my property at all times. The encroachment (storing junk leaning against my fence) is occuring from their end.
This will be the ultimate gentle and peaceful but effective psyche-out.
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