Engagement rings - Ladies especially reply please

[Trek]

I know I'm a bit younger than most here so this is something coming up for me. But I bet there is a wealth of knowledge on this board I can draw from.

I've been in the States over the holidays but going back to Estonia the first of Feb. My girlfriend (Estonian) and I have our one year anniversary Feb. 13th and I'd like to present her with a question and a ring.

I know her ring size, but I know a lot of couples now go shopping together for an engagement ring, something the girl will like. Am I too "old school" to buy the ring in advance and do the knee drop thing with it? I'd like to surprise her.

I know all about diamonds so far as quality goes, but what about shape? I tend to like the Princess cut as opposed to the traditional round cut. Opinions?

And no, I'm not doing this for residency, though some will question (FYI: Residence with a spouse still requires a 6 month income certification and 1 month waiting period for marriage after application for marriage is approved).

It's all for love!

Any other comments are welcome!

[cute fuzzy bunny]

We went with the asscher cut...something you dont see every day. You can find better prices on the princess and round cuts as they're a lot more common, but its not a big difference.

Went with bluenile.com and couldnt have been more pleased with them. Pick a stone from a huge wholesale inventory with your specifications, pick a mounting, pick a size, get it by overnight delivery. Great price, nice ring. Not sure if they deliver to estonia though...

Only problem with going with the asscher cut was I had to get her a set of matching asscher cut earrings last year to go with the ring...

[Trek]

Quote:

Originally Posted by El Guapo We went with the asscher cut...something you dont see every day. You can find better prices on the princess and round cuts as they're a lot more common, but its not a big difference. Went with bluenile.com and couldnt have been more pleased with them. Pick a stone from a huge wholesale inventory with your specifications, pick a mounting, pick a size, get it by overnight delivery. Great price, nice ring. Not sure if they deliver to estonia though... Only problem with going with the asscher cut was I had to get her a set of matching asscher cut earrings last year to go with the ring...

I'm glad to hear you were happy with Bluenile.com. That is who I was thinking of buying through. I'm still in FL till Feb so I can have it delivered here, no prob.

[VoyT]

When DH decided to pop the question, he wisely decided that I might like to pick my own ring. So he bought a ring set with opal stones to present (and yep, he did get down on one knee)...

[Trek]

Quote:

Originally Posted by VoyT When DH decided to pop the question, he wisely decided that I might like to pick my own ring. So he bought a ring set with opal stones to present (and yep, he did get down on one knee)...

Please elaborate. What exactly did he present? Was it the equivalent of a promise ring? Not sure what you present other than the actual engagement ring?

And had he "not wisely" provided you with a ring he picked out, would you have changed the answer?

[bbbamI]

I think it's fine to get her engagement ring and surprise her...and yes, pick the shape yourself. I think it will mean more to her if you do. If she's a "romantic" type of girl, by all means do the one knee thing.

If you're excited about picking the ring out yourself, but are still nervous about her not having an opinion on the choice, you could get the engagement ring, and later the both of you could pick out a wedding band. I wore my engagement ring and later on got a ring guard. They look beautiful together.

Warning.....All of the above written by a woman that got married at 19. 30 years ago!

[Cattusbabe]

DH and I picked out our rings together. Don't laugh we bought CZs. Yep, we sat there with a Diamond Essence Catalog and picked them out. I love my rings. We went whole hog and bought killers (6C tw).

No one can tell (of course most people would not know a real stone if it hit them) and the money we saved is part of the reason we were able to FIRE when we did.

We did not do the on the knee bit. At our age (very middle age) we thought that was kid stuff so we skipped it. He asked me just after we attended Meeting (we're Quaker), standing outside of the Meeting house. We married at the same place 18 months later. Best thing that ever happened to me. I hope you and your lady find as much happiness together as we have and have a long and fruitful life.

[Khan]

Total waste of money pimped by the diamond industry.

[J-Lu]

Does she have a friend that you can confide in to try to get an idea of what she likes? If not, and if you really want to surprise her, I'd go with something very traditional like a solitaire. Don't get too fancy. Princess cuts are very popular right now, as is platinum or white gold for the band. Of course, round cuts will never go out of style either - that is what I have.

[Nords]

Quote:

Originally Posted by J-Lu Does she have a friend that you can confide in to try to get an idea of what she likes?

Good luck with keeping that secret!

Can you buy from a store that's willing to upgrade if she wants to shop together?

I favor the quality togetherness shopping time. Spouse and I picked out a combined engagement/wedding ring that took up less finger space (except for the glittery rock part). But then we were sorta in a hurry... no, no, not that, we only had a week before my next deployment.

[Martha]

What is typically done in Estonia?

[cute fuzzy bunny]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trek I'm glad to hear you were happy with Bluenile.com. That is who I was thinking of buying through. I'm still in FL till Feb so I can have it delivered here, no prob.

Very pleased with them, and if you dont like it or want something else, you can return it for a full refund or exchange for 30 days. So you can give her something you picked and if she wants it to be different, she can get that.

We followed on and bought our wedding rings and my wifes earrings from them. Their prices were comparable or superior to other well regarded jewelers and far cheaper than retail. They are exceptionally explicit in their descriptions of the stones, scans of the certificates are available, etc.

There are often coupons for a decent little discount from them on fatwallet.com. A 10% off offer seems to crop up every month or two.

And yeah, the diamond thing is pure marketing and there sure is a lot of bad news behind the whole industry. But my wifes only asked me for two things in seven years...a nice engagement ring and a lexus.

[laurence]

I agree with the comment on Blue Nile....and the comment that the price of diamonds is artificially inflated by a thuggish cartel.

I would suggest you get a minimum of smaller stones to accompany the solitaire. I went overboard and it makes the big stone you spent so much on look smaller...

[Caroline]

What Khan said. Diamonds are worthless once you buy them -- better to get CZ since nobody can tell the difference anyway.

Yes, there's the romance, etc. etc.... but I'd at least ASK your future bride what she thinks first. She might be more interested in the down payment on a house, or a fabulous honeymoon, or...?

[bright eyed]

we just went through this too - congrats!

you can find all the infoyou need at pricescope.com you can even post the diamond you are considering and folks will chime in on whether it's a good one or not.

most of them will suggest goodoldgold.com or whiteflash.com both of those merchants will give you way more information than bluenile who only gives you the specs. the other two will send pics and even let you see the diamond before purchasing.

you can purchase the diamond, then figure out what setting she likes after the proposal. if you don't know what she likes, you can get a basic setting and let her decide that later.

other benefit of online is that you don't pay tax.

i also have an asscher cut and i love love love it! both those websites above have examples of all the fancy cuts.

if i recall - you already FIRED in estonia - so it sounds like you are sure to make a good purchase within your budget. with the internet, it's easier to compare prices etc. prices do go dramatically up or down depending on whether you want size, color etc.

[Nords]

Quote:

Originally Posted by bright eyed i also have an asscher cut

Who dreams up these technical descriptions-- "Beavis & Butthead Marketing, Inc."?!?

[cute fuzzy bunny]

Even funnier, it was invented by the Asscher Brothers.

Good thing they were born a century before B&B hit the streets.

[VoyT]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trek Please elaborate. What exactly did he present? Was it the equivalent of a promise ring? Not sure what you present other than the actual engagement ring? And had he "not wisely" provided you with a ring he picked out, would you have changed the answer?

No, LOL, I would not have changed the answer. I say wisely, because he knew zip about jewelry. And what I liked, he probably hadn't thought of. (I have one of those combination sets, rather than a separate band and engagement ring.)
The proposal .. he presented me with box .. inside was the ring and a note that read something like, "To be replaced, if ...." Followed by the question.

[sgeeeee]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Khan Total waste of money pimped by the diamond industry.

This is what I think, but I've come to recognize that most people look at me like I'm from another planet if I say so. DW would be insulted if I spent money on a diamond.

Don't listen to me, Trek. Put your heart into it, and good luck.

[Moemg]

Women will pretend that they don't want a diamond but most of us do .We want a one to two carat diamond .So go for it she will be thrilled even if she says you shouldn't have .
She means "Wait till my friends see this ".