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ER and impression on kids
Old 07-06-2017, 09:28 PM   #1
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ER and impression on kids

My daughter is 6 yrs old. I've had a profitable business career and am 43. I envision the ability to retire in 2-3 yrs. I only have one kid. My wife is not actively working and is doing music and teaching gym classes.

I would like to have the flexibility of ER; volunteer, garden, travel. My skills don't easily lend to consulting.

I wonder how the fact that both parents don't "work" impresses on your kid. Will her motivation and self esteem be impacted? I want her to excel and develop her own interests. Does anyone have insights on the impact on your family?
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Old 07-06-2017, 09:33 PM   #2
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My daughter is 6 yrs old. I've had a profitable business career and am 43. I envision the ability to retire in 2-3 yrs. I only have one kid. My wife is not actively working and is doing music and teaching gym classes.

I would like to have the flexibility of ER; volunteer, garden, travel. My skills don't easily lend to consulting.

I wonder how the fact that both parents don't "work" impresses on your kid. Will her motivation and self esteem be impacted? I want her to excel and develop her own interests. Does anyone have insights on the impact on your family?
I retired when my older son was about 7-8 and the younger one 2. Both of them are married, have very successful careers and are skilled sportsmen. So although I sometimes worried about what you are saying, it was clearly ok.

Ha
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Old 07-07-2017, 12:13 AM   #3
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Mine were 13 and 10 when I wrapped up my career, and I had the same concerns at the time. Have been lots of conversations about spending and making sure you get good value for the money. After I had them do the budget for a trip to Disney World, they vetoed the trip - thought it was a lot of money (in absolute terms) and not a good value.

The now 16 year old busted it to find a job to fit in with her other summer commitments. Took her to the bank today to open a checking account so she could pay for gas in the car and insurance

I think the key is constantly, but subtly, reinforce that work=money, which leads to more choices.
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Old 07-07-2017, 06:09 AM   #4
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After I had them do the budget for a trip to Disney World, they vetoed the trip - thought it was a lot of money (in absolute terms) and not a good value.

I think the key is constantly, but subtly, reinforce that work=money, which leads to more choices.
What an education they are getting! Kudos to you.

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Old 07-07-2017, 07:09 AM   #5
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I retired from my career job when the boys were 1 and 3 years old.

However, we have never completely stopped working, just do it on our terms now. I work 3 months per year at an accounting office in the winter. My wife works as a substitute in the school system and as manager of a frozen treat stand for six months.

Boys are now 18 and 20, both have checking accounts, credit card in their names, Roth IRA (with bank of dad doing a match). Each started earning money referring youth soccer at age 13, both have had summer jobs for last four years. "Going to work" is heard regularly in our house.
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Old 07-07-2017, 07:16 AM   #6
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My Dad retired early at a much later age- he was in his mid-50s and we were all out of the house. It was still a powerful lesson. Corporate politics turned ugly and he and Mom had the resources to walk away and retire to Myrtle Beach. I learned that jobs aren't always there for as long as you want them, industries go sour (he was in the steel business) and it's good to have a cushion so you have options. I retired at 61, also after encountering toxic politics. Of my 4 siblings, one retired at 58 (frugal living, great pension), one is considering it (age 57, loves his work but it's wearing him out, probably is the richest of all of us), the 63-year old isn't interested in retiring and I'm not sure about my 62-year old sister. She's a doctor but they've poured a lot into propping up their daughters and live pretty high off the hog.

I think Mom and Dad's savings habits and work ethic rubbed off on all of us to one degree or another. Kids just need to know that if you want to have the luxury of quitting paid employment earlier than the rest of the population,you have to work for it.
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Old 07-07-2017, 02:40 PM   #7
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My son saw me work more than all his friends dads were. I attended maybe a handful of ballgames, missed 75% of the holidays. I dont think he ever saw me as a person. When he saw me on the Friday before Fathers day, he told me "thanks Pop". I thought he was talking about the meal we went out for that I snatched up the bill. The bride says she thinks he was thanking me for just being me. Based on the little bit of information you gave I would say just do what you think is right, they will grow up just fine. You sound like an awesome role model.
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Old 07-07-2017, 03:26 PM   #8
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My Dad's health forced him to retire at age 54. They were fine as he had a good pension, got SSDI, paid for home and savings. I decided that one day I would also have a pension. All of us kids were out of the house. It just showed us that you can't plan out your life because bad things happen. All 3 of us are fine.
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Old 07-08-2017, 09:56 AM   #9
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I think the best thing parents can do for their kids is spend time with them. ER would enable you to be more present in their lives which would be a huge gift. I would encourage you to do so when you're financially ready.
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