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07-05-2014, 01:09 PM
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#1
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 1,525
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ER limericks
A few years back there was a ER haiku thread.
http://www.early-retirement.org/foru...ers-47371.html
Time to mix it up a bit...
A refresher on the format:
- Five lines.
- The first line usually describes a person & place (or situation).
- Lines 1, 2 and 5 end with a rhyme.
- Lines 3 and 4 end with a different rhyme.
- The "rhythm" of the poem is such that it can be recited with a 3 - 3 - 2 - 2 - 3 beat.
Here a couple to start. (Say the second one with a British accent.) Jane was planning her resignation
She came to this site asking "Inflation?"
"COLA's will shine"
"Stocks will be fine"
"Bonds are OK, but watch the duration"
Chained at his desk sits Harry
Stuck because retirement seems scary
There's plenty of treasure
He's ready for leisure
Dear wife is the one who is wary
Hopefully the mods won't have to intervene...
__________________
No doubt a continuous prosperity, though spendthrift, is preferable to an economy thriftily moral, though lean. Nevertheless, that prosperity would seem more soundly shored if, by a saving grace, more of us had the grace to save.
Life Magazine editorial, 1956
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07-05-2014, 01:18 PM
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#2
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Texas: No Country for Old Men
Posts: 50,021
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If Htown Harry had his way
We'd all write limericks, come what may
He'd have us spend time
Coming up with rhyme
Giving ER's something to do all day
__________________
Numbers is hard
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07-05-2014, 01:31 PM
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#3
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 1,525
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How appropriate that you are the first to reply, REWahoo. One of your posts was my inspiration.
http://www.early-retirement.org/foru...ml#post1467870
 Quote:
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In my youth I dreamed of dating a girl from Forney named Kate.
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I got this far with a reply, but decided that completing the poem might get me a special award from the moderators.
Wahoo sits retired in the hills
Reminiscing of Kate and her thrills...
__________________
No doubt a continuous prosperity, though spendthrift, is preferable to an economy thriftily moral, though lean. Nevertheless, that prosperity would seem more soundly shored if, by a saving grace, more of us had the grace to save.
Life Magazine editorial, 1956
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07-05-2014, 01:34 PM
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#4
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Texas: No Country for Old Men
Posts: 50,021
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You might get away with it if you posted on the joke thread... 
__________________
Numbers is hard
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07-05-2014, 01:59 PM
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#5
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Administrator
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Chicagoland
Posts: 40,699
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There once was a girl from Forney
She made all the boys super ... o wait, the theme is ER.
Sorry.
ER Forum ‘s a place to make friends
They help figure the means to our ends
Good advice they relay
Spending must be delayed
On that the SWR depends
__________________
In economics, things take longer to happen than you think they will, and then they happen faster than you thought they could.”
― Rudiger Dornbusch
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07-05-2014, 02:24 PM
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#6
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Moderator
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Flyover country
Posts: 25,342
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ERs shun the variable annuity
For income in perpetuity,
'Cause the costs and the fees
Bring strong men to their knees
And buyer's remorse isn't pretty.
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07-05-2014, 02:26 PM
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#7
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 1,525
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MichaelB
There once was a girl from Forney...
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Now I feel safer. 
The tart lived her ER down by the station
Two men kept her pleased, providing a life of elation
Mr. Stock was the young 'un
Mr. Bond was the slow one
The secret, she claimed...allocation
__________________
No doubt a continuous prosperity, though spendthrift, is preferable to an economy thriftily moral, though lean. Nevertheless, that prosperity would seem more soundly shored if, by a saving grace, more of us had the grace to save.
Life Magazine editorial, 1956
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07-05-2014, 03:08 PM
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#8
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Dryer sheet aficionado
Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 35
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A frugal young man from Nantucket
Put all his wealth in a bucket
He said with a smile
As he built up his pile
I'm LBYM'ing to take this job and chuck it.
someone was going to try to get this rhyme in.....I thought I'd try it.
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07-05-2014, 05:56 PM
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#9
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: North Bay
Posts: 1,251
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In a forum for retirement wannabes,
And financially independent gonnabes,
Networth polls always question,
Do I count real estate or pension,
Social security, annuity, or none o' these?
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07-05-2014, 05:58 PM
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#10
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Recycles dryer sheets
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 105
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Oh how I want to retire
My long term goal, to FIRE
I'm sick of my job,
Would rather sit like a blob
Any day now, my replacement they'll hire.
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07-05-2014, 06:12 PM
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#11
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Moderator Emeritus
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: New Orleans
Posts: 47,498
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She wasn't a poet, you see;
She just watched the markets, when free.
The Dow soared up higher
Her thoughts were of FIRE!
She couldn't help posting it, "Wheee!!!"
__________________
Already we are boldly launched upon the deep; but soon we shall be lost in its unshored, harbourless immensities. - - H. Melville, 1851.
Happily retired since 2009, at age 61. Best years of my life by far!
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07-05-2014, 06:15 PM
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#12
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 2,115
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To avoid being a wage slave
We all try to save save save
But the market can have other intent
And our money can soon be all spent
Still FIRE is what we all crave
Sent from my iPhone using Early Retirement Forum
__________________
“Of all the paths you take in life, make sure a few of them are dirt.” John Muir
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07-05-2014, 06:15 PM
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#13
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Western US
Posts: 1,213
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The quest for early retirement
Is hastened by miserly inspirement
They'll say you are crazy
Without work, fat and lazy
Proper vision is an important requirement
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07-05-2014, 06:22 PM
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#14
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: North Bay
Posts: 1,251
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Htown Harry
Wahoo sits retired in the hills
Reminiscing of Kate and her thrills...
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What he thinks about most,
Is those nights at the coast,
When she showed him her LBYM skills.
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07-05-2014, 07:19 PM
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#15
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: North Bay
Posts: 1,251
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Htown Harry
Wahoo sits retired in the hills
Reminiscing of Kate and her thrills...
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Recalling her financial gyrations,
And her asset allocations,
And wishing he'd been named in her will.
or
Oh she had the looks,
But when he saw her books,
All he found were some overdue bills.
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07-05-2014, 07:35 PM
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#16
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Texas: No Country for Old Men
Posts: 50,021
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OK, I'll take a shot at it:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Htown Harry
Wahoo sits retired in the hills
Reminiscing of Kate and her thrills...
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"My returns are first rate,"
said sweet Forney Kate,
"and Wellesley will pay all the bills!"
__________________
Numbers is hard
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07-05-2014, 08:50 PM
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#17
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 2,115
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ER limericks
Please tell me if I'm able to quit
With my work I don't give a spit
How can I not have enough
To do OMY mighty tough
I'll FIRE anyway cause I don't give a darn
Sent from my iPhone using Early Retirement Forum
__________________
“Of all the paths you take in life, make sure a few of them are dirt.” John Muir
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07-05-2014, 09:53 PM
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#18
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 1,525
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Shrink your house, that's the adage
Declutter it, too, get rid of the baggage
Track your receipts
Recycle those sheets
Then hope for RIF with a real nice package
__________________
No doubt a continuous prosperity, though spendthrift, is preferable to an economy thriftily moral, though lean. Nevertheless, that prosperity would seem more soundly shored if, by a saving grace, more of us had the grace to save.
Life Magazine editorial, 1956
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07-06-2014, 11:54 AM
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#19
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 1,085
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There once was a young man named Myer
Who thought of his job with much ire
He learned from this site
Saving money alright
And now he is able to FIRE!
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07-08-2014, 10:25 AM
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#20
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: yonder
Posts: 2,851
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Quote:
Originally Posted by W2R
She wasn't a poet, you see;
She just watched the markets, when free.
The Dow soared up higher
Her thoughts were of FIRE!
She couldn't help posting it, "Wheee!!!"
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She wasn't a poet, you see;
She just watched the markets, when free.
When the Dow soared higher
My thoughts became dire
Because I knew she couldn't help posting it, "Wheee!!!"
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