Facebook invitations to your party

[Nords]

All my neighbors know that I'm not a stickler for etiquette, but this still seems awkward. This was put up at 9 AM today by one of our Nords family friends:

Quote:

"We are having our annual Neighborhood Block Party today. Please stop by if you can 4:00PM to ?"

I've been to his house a few times, and it's always been good. Great food. We'd enjoy ourselves. His rules are that he does all the work and we're not expected to bring anything but our charming selves.

I enjoy it when one of my friends posts "We're at Starbucks, come over and join us" or "Are you at the football game? We're in this section." It's joining in an event that you're already planning to attend, or at least in a public place.

Putting out an e-mail invitation, let alone actual snail mail, can be painful labor compared to a 30-second Facebook post. So I can understand the attractiveness of using FB to bring everyone over to your place.

But FB's privacy settings are so confusing and ever-changing, and enough people have screwed them up over the years, that we fear ringing our friend's doorbell to be greeted with "Oh! You! Why, you're here! Um.... come on in! Yeah, that's it!"

Luckily there aren't any FB receipts or RSVPs, and he can't tell whether or not I've actually read his invitation. Not as far as I can tell, anyway...

[W2R]

I'd go ahead and attend if you want to, and pretend you hadn't read it if you didn't want to go.

Surely if he is putting the invitation on Facebook, that would imply that he will have plenty of sodas, snacks, and so on, no matter how many people show up.

Still, maybe you could bring something. You could call and ask what he needs, or just show up with some 2 liter bottles of soft drinks or something.

Seems to me the whole thing is intended to be pretty informal and friendly.

[JPatrick]

As clumsy as I am with facebook, if I put an invite out to the block I'd probably end up with half the city of Honolulu getting it.

Maybe your block does this kind of commo all the time, but I'd be inclined to call the sender and say..hey I got your invite and I sure hope everyone else did considering some of these folks don't always check their facebook page.
That would be my plan if you want the gig to be a success.
Otherwise, you have a clear excuse to miss it.

[Sandhog]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nords Luckily there aren't any FB receipts or RSVPs, and he can't tell whether or not I've actually read his invitation. Not as far as I can tell, anyway...

Actually, there is. A friend called and said she sent her birthday party through FB. I haven't been on the FB since the tax time since my accountant is on FB and I couldn't find his information other than through FB. And when you click on the "Events" there is/are invitation(s) with RSVP. Once you have read the invitation, sender knows you have open the invitation even you don't respond. Also, depends on open invitation or private, my understanding is that only the invitees could see the and respond to the event.

So much time wasted on none productive web sites. Other than ER.org, I don't spend much time on others since it's meaningless.

[obgyn65]

I agree with W2R.

Quote:

Originally Posted by W2R I'd go ahead and attend if you want to, and pretend you hadn't read it if you didn't want to go. (...) Seems to me the whole thing is intended to be pretty informal and friendly.

[Amethyst]

If somebody put up an invitation on FB, I wouldn't see it unless they posted it specifically to my "wall."

The site's functionality must have changed in the past 2 weeks, since I used to see other people's posts to their own "walls," but no longer do. Now, I must visit each contact's site individually to see what they are posting. It's a big step downward, and I find myself less inclined to look at FB.

Amethyst

[East Texas]

We're having a communications issue with some of the young 'uns in the family. They used call us and / or send us emails with an occasional picture. It was nice, friendly, and personal. Now they'e instructed the entire family to read their FB if we want to know what they're doing these days. This pretty much relegates us to the category of "acquaintances" instead of family since everyone would get the same information.

We're probably the only ones without a FB page... don't care... what's on the internet stays on the internet and our private business is just that - private.

[Sarah in SC]

I think it sounds like he forgot to send out notices about the party and the FB option seemed to be the fastest way to put the word out there.
I'd go if you usually do, and want to. But FB has made it much easier to issue invitations and also ignore them, as you wish. Compared to more formal avenues of correspondence, it is less painful to just click a "maybe" and leave it at that for stuff you may or may not attend.

[donheff]

Where do you live Nords, some weird block where everybody joins Facebook and friends each other? I would think FB would be a lousy method for most people to announce a block party. Maybe two neighbors would learn about it. So, if you are a FB friend of this guy do you consider yourself invited even though you are not on the block?

[FreeAtLast]

It is a block party. They are just trying to contact as many people as possible with the little time they have in preparing for the party. Perhaps they could not get in touch with you.

Go and have fun.

Good friends used to call and invite us to their home for gatherings. Now since she got an Iphone I often get a text. The message has not changed just the method of delivery.

[rescueme]

Quote:

Originally Posted by East Texas We're probably the only ones without a FB page... don't care... what's on the internet stays on the internet and our private business is just that - private.

No, you're not ...

DW was "suckered" to join FB to see some pictures of a women she met on one of our trips, and started getting all kinds of "invites" from folks in Europe (where my four grandparents came from) since she has the same surname.

It's fine for those that have friends and family; I understand that draw.

For us, it was a PIA. I finally got her name off of FB (took two weeks); I never had a presence there.

I'm with you (being a very private person). Anyway, my life is so dull, you would not be interested in my "wall" ...

[Nords]

I don't particularly care for the huge time suck that FB can become, let alone the sloppy programming, but it's the only way to keep in touch with our daughter. She just spent the weekend with her grandparents and posted over 100 photos of their activities. That would never happen on any other communications network, including sitting in her dorm room with a laptop to show the photos. It would never occur to her grandparents to share it with their daughter, either.

Last month our daughter learned Navy sailing, and it turns out that she enjoys it. Another 100+ photos that we never would've seen, including hilarious commentary of someone discovering that Navy sailing is fun. A woman in her unit was commissioned last month and is stationed in Pearl Harbor. That ceremony and those details went on FB, or otherwise it would've been another connection we would've missed. And so on...

The harshest reality FB has taught me is that I shouldn't look at the latest photos of my high-school hot-chick classmates. Talk about destroying a bunch of cherished fantasies memories. Some have aged well, and a few have aged very very well, but the majority have really have let themselves go. I'll never attend a high school or college reunion again. The people I care about I'll just visit on my own, or we'll get together on their next trip here.

Quote:

Originally Posted by donheff Where do you live Nords, some weird block where everybody joins Facebook and friends each other? I would think FB would be a lousy method for most people to announce a block party. Maybe two neighbors would learn about it. So, if you are a FB friend of this guy do you consider yourself invited even though you are not on the block?

That's my thought too, but I don't want to come across as a curmudgeon.

He's a shipmate and he's back after a long absence, so perhaps he and his family got overwhelmed with the details of sending invitations by other means.

My vocabulary was imprecise. It turns out that it wasn't a "FB invitation" but rather a post on FB that invited people to his party. So maybe he can control who sees that post through various groups, or maybe he really did invite his entire friends list. Frankly I'd be terrified to put out an invitation on FB because even if I thought I understood who'd be seeing it, I still wouldn't trust a FB feature to work the same tomorrow as it does today.

But perhaps FB has encouraged a much more casual approach toward getting together, just as cell phones have "reduced" the need to plan ahead.

We didn't go. Doesn't feel comfortable. No big deal, and the subject will probably never come up. We'll get together some other time, some other way.

[donheff]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nords We didn't go. Doesn't feel comfortable. No big deal, and the subject will probably never come up. We'll get together some other time, some other way.

Pretty cold. You are probably his only Facebook friend on the block and you don't even show up. Dogs and burgers going to waste. Maybe you can wander by now and apologize for being otherwise committed and see if there are any left over beers to claim.

[East Texas]

Quote:

Originally Posted by FreeAtLast It is a block party. They are just trying to contact as many people as possible with the little time they have in preparing for the party. Perhaps they could not get in touch with you.

Unless Nords lives on the biggest block in the world, whatever happened to the old fashioned way of knocking on doors and personally inviting people (or assigning that task to other neighbors)? Stick a flyer in their door if they're not home.

We asked neighbors to ask their neighbors the one time we did a last minute gathering when we lived in the MegaCity. They all showed up, plus anyone who happened to be in the neighborhood at the time. The realtors showing houses two blocks over even dropped by.

[East Texas]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nords I don't particularly care for the huge time suck that FB can become, let alone the sloppy programming, but it's the only way to keep in touch with our daughter. She just spent the weekend with her grandparents and posted over 100 photos of their activities. That would never happen on any other communications network, including sitting in her dorm room with a laptop to show the photos. It would never occur to her grandparents to share it with their daughter, either. Last month our daughter learned Navy sailing, and it turns out that she enjoys it. Another 100+ photos that we never would've seen, including hilarious commentary of someone discovering that Navy sailing is fun. A woman in her unit was commissioned last month and is stationed in Pearl Harbor. That ceremony and those details went on FB, or otherwise it would've been another connection we would've missed. And so on...

Our D-I-L sends links to some of their vacation photos on her FB. We don't have to join to look at them.

Quote:

see if there are any left over beers to claim...

Dang it... now I'm worried about all those little lonely cold beers with no place to go.....