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Favorite Phrases Your Dad/Mom Used on You.........
Old 05-30-2007, 03:07 PM   #1
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Favorite Phrases Your Dad/Mom Used on You.........

Here's a few of my "favorites":

Compared to your latest decisions, that box of rocks over there is lookin' pretty smart right about now...........

Who kidnapped my son, and left me this creature from outer space?

Keep that up, and your name will be MUD!!

I hope you have kids that give you as big as headache as you give me...........

Just a few timeless quotes...........

Funny, when I was 17 I thought my old man was the stupidest man on earth, and now every year I look at him like he's Einstein...........
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Old 05-30-2007, 03:17 PM   #2
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Unfortunately- one quote sticks in my mind-

"if you want it-
you need it-
if you need it-
buy it.
You only live once and you cant take your money with you"

Sigh... I wish I was kidding. Im planning for the day I have to take care of him.
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Old 05-30-2007, 03:38 PM   #3
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Stop running around like a fart in a whirlwind...

I'll jerk a knot in your tail...

"Until I was eight years old, I thought my name was Jesus Christ." Bill Cosby
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Old 05-30-2007, 03:53 PM   #4
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"I have had the meat!"

No idea what he thought it meant, but it was Dad's exclamation when he had had enough and was about to fly off the handle.
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Old 05-30-2007, 04:09 PM   #5
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"Eat you beans. There are starving children in Armenia..."

I never knew where Armenia was, nor did I ever read about their plight in the local newspaper, yet every day the same worn-out warning about Armenian children!!

I suppose that we kids were supposed to be grateful for our full plates of great chow (we were) but...if we did not eat it, would Mom really have it sent to Armenia?
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Old 05-30-2007, 04:47 PM   #6
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When I would ask for something my Dad would say:

Close your eyes and what do you see. I'd say nothing and he'd say.
That's what your getting.
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Old 05-30-2007, 04:48 PM   #7
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By my mom: "My aching back!"

Always used that if I screwed up or did something she didn't agree with. In fact she still says it.
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Old 05-30-2007, 04:51 PM   #8
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dad would both mutter and exclaim:

"Bunch of mental midgets around here..."

because he was the only one who knew the right way to do everything and we never did exactly as instructed because we could care less...
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Old 05-30-2007, 05:25 PM   #9
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The one I heard most often went like this:
Me- Dad can I want to go to the fair
Dad- Do you have some fair money?

I eventually started washing cars, pulling weeds, cutting grass, etc so I could say "Why yes I do sir"
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Old 05-30-2007, 05:33 PM   #10
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From my father-in-law:
You can't enlighten the unconscious.

Any idiot can pay full price!
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Old 05-30-2007, 05:50 PM   #11
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Mom - "Don't throw that away, it might be worth something someday"
alternatively - "Don't throw that away, it might be a collector's item someday"
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Old 05-30-2007, 06:02 PM   #12
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Mom _Wait till your father comes home !

Mom- You'd be crying with an ice cream cone in your hand ??
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Old 05-30-2007, 06:21 PM   #13
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externally, my mother was the eternal optimist, power of positive thinker extraordinaire. she'd say stuff like "fantastic!", "isn't this great!" and "that was the best meal, dessert, vacation, (______fill in the blank) i ever had!"

if we didn't have so many surviving, well, to be polite, traditionalists, i was going to put on mom's tombstone "that was the best life i ever had!"
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Old 05-30-2007, 06:32 PM   #14
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My Mom -- "count your blessings" - heard this alot and found it very annoying - still hear it alot....and have to agree.

My Dad "a bird in the hand...." he was right

Dad - "you are only as good as your last performance"....very megacorp...

Both Mom and Dad - "OK -- you don't have to buckle down and study more....you can make a living off the sweat on your brow" -- this one scared the cr*p out of me

When I was graduating from college I said- "man, next thing you know I'll be old"! My Mom said "consider the alternative"

Dad - if you are the BEST at ANYTHING you will be successful--I could always come up w/ some smart a$$ example of how that hypothysis was wrong!
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Old 05-30-2007, 06:58 PM   #15
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Mom:
Were you brought up in a barn?

It's all a matter of whose tail is caught in the door.

(Response to: why did you do that?)
To make little boys ask questions.

(Response to: his parents let him...)
Call them up, we'll see if you can live there.

(Response to: if...)
If you had a square @ss you could make bricks.

I hope your children are just as rotten as you are.
(I didn't have any.)

Use it up.
Wear it out.
Make it do.
Do without.

Dad:
Merry Christmas!
(used year round as an expletive so as not to swear in front of us)
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Old 05-30-2007, 07:15 PM   #16
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Wait till your father gets home

**** in one hand, want in the other ( when we would ask for something they didn't think we needed)

Your face is going to stick like that.

Uglier than a cart load of assholes. (moms favorite)

Of course the - don't do that you'll put your/someones eye out.

I told you not to do that, someone would get hurt (as we went crying to her)

Don't you know kids are starving in China (we offered to mail the leftovers)

I'm sure there are a LOT more I can't think of at the moment.
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Did I miss it?
Old 05-30-2007, 07:24 PM   #17
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Did I miss it?

If you don't have something nice to say -- don't say anything at all!
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Old 05-30-2007, 07:25 PM   #18
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Instead of writing them all out, I'll just suggest that you watch reruns of "All In The Family" and listen to Archie.......They modeled him after my Dad! So most of his phrases don't bear repeating in public places (or forums).
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Old 05-30-2007, 07:29 PM   #19
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Nobody else got my favourite (as I did something only a teenager can do) "You got your mother's brains, boy"
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Old 05-30-2007, 10:13 PM   #20
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Mom...."Ask your father."

Dad....."Ask your mother."

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