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Old 10-09-2017, 11:20 AM   #41
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Perhaps your sister's husband felt a "vibe" that he was not welcome at family functions.

You can never get fully into other relationships. What something looks like from the outside is not always so. Dynamics are hard to read. You offered help. They declined. I'd drop the issue.

Plenty of students get into Harvard & Ivies from public schools
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Old 10-09-2017, 12:10 PM   #42
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Is your niece's father in her life?

Consider: https://www.fidelity.com/managed-acc...trust-services
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Old 10-09-2017, 12:17 PM   #43
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Online, there are many articles saying banks or attorneys can be hired to be executor. However, when I tried calling a few attorneys and banks, they all say they don't do that.
If anyone knows a link or site to find a way to hire an executor, that would be helpful.
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Old 10-09-2017, 12:23 PM   #44
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Make an appointment with a Fidelity representative and explore their services.
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Old 10-09-2017, 12:47 PM   #45
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If you really want to give most to you niece that is a minor and I'll assume that you don't want all the inheritance being public, I would suggest talking with an estate/elder law lawyer. You likely need a living trust to set things up while your alive and have it convert to an irrevocable trust upon your death. You could move your house (if you have one) into the trust now and it could be disposed of after your death. Your investment accounts could be TOD to your trust and IRA have the beneficiary designations go to the trust (this part may not be the best tax planning). This way few assets would pass by will/probate. This way if your niece is still a minor at your passing, your trust can control the distribution over time in a manor you specify.

I would search trust services on google. I did that here and a few local banks came up and some financial advisory firm... all that are well known for that service. You would have to find something either near you or your niece.
I'm in the middle of re-planning our estate plan. Find a good lawyer and take some time reading on estate planning.
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Old 10-09-2017, 01:02 PM   #46
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I think what I'll do is this:
Tomorrow when banks open, call a local branch of one I deal with already, and see about going in to talk about using them as trustee.

As for executor, my mother could do it for a few years, but she is older and likely to either die or get Alzheimer's within 5-10 years, if not sooner. We both have the double risk factor gene, where we all will likely get Alzhemiers in our 70's or 80's, if a cure or vaccine is not found. Maybe not, but chances are greater than 60 percent based on genes.

I have a distantly related responsible cousin in her 50's who might be willing to serve as a backup if my mother became incapacitated or died before I did.

I could ask her, though I'm not sure if she'd say yes or not.

First I am going to see what the bank has to say about what's involved with them being a trustee.

After about 25 years, I'd likely change the executor to be my niece, as she'd be in her late 30's by then.

I could keep the bank the trustee at that time.

My distant cousin actually lives 2 miles from me with her family, though we don't see each other too often as she's busy with her teenage sons and husband. He always seemed to be responsible, and she runs the house, not him. So I'd feel comfortable she'd do what I wanted if she agreed to the job as executor.

I think if I named my mother as first executor, and she knew she'd only need to step in if my mother could not do it, she might be more likely to accept.
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Old 10-09-2017, 02:43 PM   #47
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... As for executor, my mother could do it for a few years ...
The executor's job is to gather assets and distribute them as instructed in the will, including whatever assets you might be putting into a trust. When that is done, the executor's job is done. So, a few months max. Often faster.

Please get thee to a good lawyer; you are overthinking a lot of this.
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Old 10-09-2017, 02:51 PM   #48
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The executor's job is to gather assets and distribute them as instructed in the will, including whatever assets you might be putting into a trust. When that is done, the executor's job is done. So, a few months max. Often faster.

Please get thee to a good lawyer; you are overthinking a lot of this.


There is also filing a final tax return, probating the will, selling assets, settling disputes between beneficiaries...can last a year or more.
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Old 10-09-2017, 02:58 PM   #49
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Please get thee to a good lawyer; you are overthinking a lot of this.
+1
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Old 10-09-2017, 04:53 PM   #50
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Here is what I recommend. Go to an estate attorney an create a revocable living trust, you as grantor trustee and another person you trust as reserve trustee. In that trust you designate how it's assets will be disbursed after your death, even described how the trust assets should be managed after your death. You can name the trust as the beneficiary of your IRAs. Change the title of all your other significant assets to the name of the trust.

Personally I have more confidence in Fidelity's trust management services than that of a bank. I have met bank trust managers, they are nice honest people but they are subject to the bank's investment priorities. Have you ever been solicited by your bank to invest in one of their products? I listened to one try to sell me and demurred.

A revocable living trust becomes irrevocable once the last grantor trustee has died. If that happened before you were required to withdraw MRD's it all becomes taxable income TO THE TRUST the year that you die. Roth $ gross value isn't taxable at the time of your passing, don't know if it remains a roth when managed by a trust. Otherwise the trust, I believe, can continue to grow subject to the MRD schedule in place. Keep in mind the fact that as long as your trust has assets someone will need to file a tax return for that entity and pay taxes on that income [been there, done that]. One of the advantages of the likes of Fidelity is they have a lot of experience with that stuff.
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Old 10-09-2017, 07:22 PM   #51
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How much does a trustee bank (such as Fidelity or Bank of America, etc) charge, typically?
Is it an annual fee or is it paid upon opening the account, or upon death, or both?

The only assets I want to put in the trust are possibly my house (worth under $200k) and $400K of my Roth and non-IRA investments. I want to do this by designating the trust as beneficiary.

I don't want anything done to the trust unless I die which may not happen for 40 or more years.
If there is a large annual fee I'm wondering if it's worth doing.

I've been reading online seeing these huge yearly fees for trustees, and I don't know if that's right or not.

A lot charge a percentage of assets under management. However, if I change what I put in the trust from year to year, as my assets grow or I take some out of the trust, how will they know what to charge?
I often open new accounts to move money around - then want to designate the trust as beneficiary - so would I need to notify the trust each time I open a new account so they can add more fees?

Edit: The attorney said the trust would be a revocable spendthrift trust.
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Old 10-09-2017, 07:37 PM   #52
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^ I think the trustee fees are a percentage of assets, but the fees start when you die, not between now and then. Also, the fees would end when the trust is done, which would be whenever your last payout to your niece happens. If your last payout to your now-13-year-old niece is when she is 40, then if you live another 27 years or so your trust won't be in existence for more than a year or so.
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Old 10-09-2017, 08:24 PM   #53
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Thanks. If that's the case than it's worth it.

I am anxious to get this done properly.

Just wrote out instructions for the executor for my dogs, so they will know who to call who will take care of them. Several rescue folks I work with would, yet if my executor was not aware of that, they might end up going to the pound! They are trained therapy dogs (for visiting sick kids and hospitals - they are not the kind who are allowed on planes or supermarkets). There are several people who know and love them, who would love to have them. My mother and cousin have not seen them work (no extra visitors or photos are allowed dealing with patients on therapy visits), and are not aware how much they are loved by many other people, not just by me.

So much I need to write out, and my old will has some of it already - but I need to go over it all to be sure it's still correct.

I can't wait to meet with the bank, hopefully tomorrow, to discuss hiring them as a trustee - if fees are reasonable.

I really appreciate this forum, and huge response I've gotten.
It has helped immensely.
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Old 10-09-2017, 09:41 PM   #54
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I'd get a living trust, prepared by an experienced estate attorney, name a few (in order) younger licensed professional fiduciaries as trustee, with a bank named last as a back-stop just in case it goes that far. An experienced attorney is key so the language in the trust is customized to make sure your sister, and thus her husband, don't get access.
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Old 10-10-2017, 12:35 AM   #55
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Don't find some form on the internet to create a trust or do your will. Consult with a competent attorney who does that kind of work on a regular basis. I am an attorney myself and I even took Wills and Estates when I was in law school. Even so, when I was getting my own will done I had it done by a lawyer who regularly does that kind of work (I do not) and relied on that advice.

If I was in your situation, I would probably find a bank trustee. There are many situations where I might not want to do that, but the situation you describe is one where a bank trustee would seem to be worth looking at.

That said -- the laws regarding wills and estates and trusts varies from state to state. A good wills and estates lawyer should be able to advise you on this and whether a bank trustee is your best option given your goals and situation. If that lawyer thinks a bank trustee is right for your situation, that lawyer may be able to suggest several bank trustees that he or she recommends. You could then look into each one. There may be other options as well. This is a situation to get right and where you should get advice from someone who actually has expertise in this area in your state.
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Old 10-10-2017, 01:52 AM   #56
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Yes, I agree, I am willing to pay an attorney if I know they'll do a good job.

Hopefully nothing will happen to me between now and the time I get the trust in place. Doubt it unless it were a freak accident.

I know I may change my mind later when niece is 18 or older, no way of knowing that of course now. Just as, when I did my will a few years ago (when I had fewer assets), I had no way of knowing I'd want to take my sister off the will. I don't hate my sister, I just think she's very misguided with a lot of things, and don't want her having my money.

After an incident last night with my sister at my niece's birthday dinner, it set off a panic in my mind that I must change this now. Several things have been going on over the past few years leading up to this, and I've tried to overlook/ignore many things, but last night was the straw that broke the camel's back. It made me realize how much control my sister has given up over her finances/well being to her husband over the years. I really don't know him well (I have tried to get to know him over the past 10 yrs, but he purposely stays away from most family events and travels often) nor do I trust him based on the little I know about him.

Not how she used to be/feel with her first few years of marriage or her last marriage (to my niece's father long ago), but she's changed. Her choice.

I am really glad this happened, sad and upsetting as it was, so at least I know to make changes, and no longer have my head in the sand about the reality that she should not be on the will or named as beneficiary anymore.
It's appears you're very leery of BIL. Leery enough that you're concerned for your safety when they find out sister is no longer executor or beneficiary?

Be careful, or perhaps I've watched too much "Forensic Files".
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Old 10-10-2017, 03:45 AM   #57
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I would not want any 18 YO to have control of so much money all at once...


I would put in a trust and let them live off of the income of the trust until they reach a certain age, say 30 and let them get half... then the rest after they turn 40.... this will give them some time to get smarter about money...
Years ago I knew an attorney whose parents died when he was 16. He received 1/3 of the estate at age 18. Blew it all. He was to receive another 1/3 upon graduation from college, so he went back to college. The final 1/3 was released at age 30. In his 40's, he said he had spent the early 2/3, but could point out each dollar received at age 30. All had been invested wisely due in part to his earlier poor judgement.
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Old 10-10-2017, 05:10 AM   #58
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$1000 sounds like a bargain. We went with the best-known estate law office in our area (also recommended by people we know). We are paying a flat fee of $3600 for wills, MPOA's, DPOA's, detailed end-of-life instructions in accordance with MD law (each state does things a little differently), and multiple meetings with different partners in the firm (they want you to Get To Know Their Team, but of course it's also b/c the principal partner charges more, so they throw junior partners in the mix...fortunately, we've liked the junior partners).

We are going back soon for a 3rd meeting. Each meeting results in some updates/changes to the documents, as we continue reading and thinking through them - as Riane says, it's a thick stack. With hourly fees of $400, I am glad we went with the flat-fee option. I am sure we will be over 9 hours by the time everything is done.

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Our living will spells out every thing. The details do not leave question to anything including our death wishes, beneficiaries, power of attorney, medical issues, on and on. It's a pretty thick book.

Word of mouth about the attorney to use was important to us. We asked a lot of people for references. The cost for ours was $1000, but we can rest assure our wishes will be carried out and if one of us is left behind, well that's what a living will is...for the living. Our trustees have copies and know where everything important is.
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Old 10-10-2017, 09:38 AM   #59
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Paying a bank trustee only occurs if you have them manage your trust, which typically doesnít happen until you die, or you and a spouse die. Itís also not always wise to transfer your assets into a trust immediately. Get an attorney to help you with that. When we had a lower net worth we had our assets in a joint trust, but now that our assets have grown close to the estate tax threshold, she had us move all our assets to JWROS. Partly because of some law changes and court decisions. Our trust wonít be funded until the first of us dies. We also have a special trust for retirement accounts. You donít want to intermingle the two. Get a good attorney in your state. Decide on the bank or trust company that will manage the trust after your death. Donít sign over your assets for them to manage yet. Discuss all this with your lawyer. The trust bank will have some wording theyíll want to see in the trust, but listen to your lawyer first.
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Old 10-10-2017, 09:43 AM   #60
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Originally Posted by workburnout View Post
How much does a trustee bank (such as Fidelity or Bank of America, etc) charge, typically?
Is it an annual fee or is it paid upon opening the account, or upon death, or both?

The only assets I want to put in the trust are possibly my house (worth under $200k) and $400K of my Roth and non-IRA investments. I want to do this by designating the trust as beneficiary.

I don't want anything done to the trust unless I die which may not happen for 40 or more years.
If there is a large annual fee I'm wondering if it's worth doing.

I've been reading online seeing these huge yearly fees for trustees, and I don't know if that's right or not.

A lot charge a percentage of assets under management. However, if I change what I put in the trust from year to year, as my assets grow or I take some out of the trust, how will they know what to charge?
I often open new accounts to move money around - then want to designate the trust as beneficiary - so would I need to notify the trust each time I open a new account so they can add more fees?

Edit: The attorney said the trust would be a revocable spendthrift trust.
As many people have said (self included), you really, really, really need to see an attorney who specializes in estate planning and not rely on SGOTI for this stuff.
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