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For what it is worth on a chilly Sunday morning.
Old 01-07-2018, 07:38 AM   #1
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For what it is worth on a chilly Sunday morning.

A copy and paste job.

Many of us are between 65 and death, i.e. old. My friend Alan S Bame sent me this excellent list for aging . . . and I have to agree it's good advice to follow. I'm particularly interested in tune with #19.

1. Itís time to use the money you saved up. Use it and enjoy it. Donít just keep it for those who may have no notion of the sacrifices you made to get it. Remember there is nothing more dangerous than a son or daughter-in-law with big ideas for your hard-earned capital. Warning: This is also a bad time for investments, even if it seems wonderful or fool-proof. They only bring problems and worries. This is a time for you to enjoy some peace and quiet.

2. Stop worrying about the financial situation of your children and grandchildren, and donít feel bad spending your money on yourself. Youíve taken care of them for many years, and youíve taught them what you could. You gave them an education, food, shelter and support. The responsibility is now theirs to earn their own money.

3. Keep a healthy life, without great physical effort. Do moderate exercise (like walking every day), eat well and get your sleep. Itís easy to become sick, and it gets harder to remain healthy. That is why you need to keep yourself in good shape and be aware of your medical and physical needs. Keep in touch with your doctor, do tests even when youíre feeling well. Stay informed.

4. Always buy the best, most beautiful items for your significant other. The key goal is to enjoy your money with your partner. One day one of you will miss the other, and the money will not provide any comfort then, enjoy it together.

5. Donít stress over the little things. Youíve already overcome so much in your life. You have good memories and bad ones, but the important thing is the present. Donít let the past drag you down and donít let the future frighten you. Feel good in the now. Small issues will soon be forgotten.

6. Regardless of age, always keep love alive. Love your partner, love life, love your family, love your neighbor and remember: ďA man is not old as long as he has intelligence and affection.Ē

7. Be proud, both inside and out. Donít stop going to your hair salon or barber, do your nails, go to the dermatologist and the dentist, keep your perfumes and creams well stocked. When you are well-maintained on the outside, it seeps in, making you feel proud and strong.

8. Donít lose sight of fashion trends for your age, but keep your own sense of style. Thereís nothing worse than an older person trying to wear the current fashion among youngsters. Youíve developed your own sense of what looks good on you Ė keep it and be proud of it. Itís part of who you are.

9. ALWAYS stay up-to-date. Read newspapers, watch the news. Go online and read what people are saying. Make sure you have an active email account and try to use some of those social networks. Youíll be surprised what old friends youíll meet. Keeping in touch with what is going on and with the people you know is important at any age.

10. Respect the younger generation and their opinions. They may not have the same ideals as you, but they are the future, and will take the world in their direction. Give advice, not criticism, and try to remind them that yesterdayís wisdom still applies today.

11. Never use the phrase: ďIn my time.Ē Your time is now. As long as youíre alive, you are part of this time. You may have been younger, but you are still you now, having fun and enjoying life.

12. Some people embrace their golden years, while others become bitter and surly. Life is too short to waste your days on the latter. Spend your time with positive, cheerful people, itíll rub off on you and your days will seem that much better. Spending your time with bitter people will make you older and harder to be around.

13. Do not surrender to the temptation of living with your children or grandchildren (if you have a financial choice, that is). Sure, being surrounded by family sounds great, but we all need our privacy. They need theirs and you need yours. If youíve lost your partner (our deepest condolences), then find a person to move in with you and help out. Even then, do so only if you feel you really need the help or do not want to live alone.

14. Donít abandon your hobbies. If you donít have any, make new ones. You can travel, hike, cook, read, dance. You can adopt a cat or a dog, grow a garden, play cards, checkers, chess, dominoes, golf. You can paint, volunteer or just collect certain items. Find something you like and spend some real time having fun with it.

15. Even if you donít feel like it, try to accept invitations. Baptisms, graduations, birthdays, weddings, conferences. Try to go. Get out of the house, meet people you havenít seen in a while, experience something new (or something old). But donít get upset when youíre not invited. Some events are limited by resources, and not everyone can be hosted. The important thing is to leave the house from time to time. Go to museums, go walk through a field. Get out there.

16. Be a conversationalist. Talk less and listen more. Some people go on and on about the past, not caring if their listeners are really interested. Thatís a great way of reducing their desire to speak with you. Listen first and answer questions, but donít go off into long stories unless asked to. Speak in courteous tones and try not to complain or criticize too much unless you really need to. Try to accept situations as they are. Everyone is going through the same things, and people have a low tolerance for hearing complaints. Always find some good things to say as well.

17. Pain and discomfort go hand in hand with getting older. Try not to dwell on them but accept them as a part of the cycle of life weíre all going through. Try to minimize them in your mind. They are not who you are, they are something that life added to you. If they become your entire focus, you lose sight of the person you used to be.

18. If youíve been offended by someone Ė forgive them. If youíve offended someone - apologize. Donít drag around resentment with you. It only serves to make you sad and bitter. It doesnít matter who was right. Someone once said: ďHolding a grudge is like taking poison and expecting the other person to die.Ē Donít take that poison. Forgive, forget and move on with your life.

19. If you have a strong belief, savor it. But donít waste your time trying to convince others. They will make their own choices no matter what you tell them, and it will only bring you frustration. Live your faith and set an example. Live true to your beliefs and let that memory sway them.

20. Laugh. Laugh A LOT. Laugh at everything. Remember, you are one of the lucky ones. You managed to have a life, a long one. Many never get to this age, never get to experience a full life. But you did. So whatís not to laugh about? Find the humor in your situation.

21. Take no notice of what others say about you and even less notice of what they might be thinking. Theyíll do it anyway, and you should have pride in yourself and what youíve achieved. Let them talk and donít worry. They have no idea about your history, your memories and the life youíve lived so far. Thereís still much to be written, so get busy writing and donít waste time thinking about what others might think. Now is the time to be at rest, at peace and as happy as you can be!

AND, as Alan's message suggests. REMEMBER: ďLife is too short to drink bad wine.Ē Or, in my case, bad Arnold Palmer.
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Old 01-07-2018, 07:45 AM   #2
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Great list, really enjoyed it, many things to think about. Does this list mean I can quit trying to lose these doggone 10 pounds I have been trying to lose forever?
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Old 01-07-2018, 07:48 AM   #3
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Well put. Thanks for posting.
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Old 01-07-2018, 07:53 AM   #4
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Reflects my views pretty much although I would think vigorous exercise (3) is better if you can still do it. As in most of these lists they reflect the personal view of the author and should not be considered “universal truths”. Easy to say, often very hard to implement.
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Old 01-07-2018, 07:54 AM   #5
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I sent this to my 79 year old Dad, who I have been telling to spend his money rather than hold on to it lately. A lot of "step-children" who will blow what he has saved/created in life for things that are gone in a year or less.

Thanks!
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Old 01-07-2018, 08:07 AM   #6
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What's his position on a SWR?
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Old 01-07-2018, 10:23 AM   #7
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Great post. Thanks.
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Old 01-07-2018, 10:39 AM   #8
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Who are Charles Grimes and Steve Korker? I was looking for attribution and found these people.
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Old 01-07-2018, 10:54 AM   #9
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I agree with some of these. Others, not so much.

Quote:
Originally Posted by frayne View Post
Many of us are between 65 and death, i.e. old.
Is that your definition of old? I'm 63 and don't think of myself as near old at all. Perhaps that will change at 65, but I doubt it. I believe that "old" is a state of mind, not a number.

Quote:
1. Warning: This is also a bad time for investments, even if it seems wonderful or fool-proof. They only bring problems and worries.
I can't agree with that at all.

Quote:
2. Stop worrying about the financial situation of your children and grandchildren, and don’t feel bad spending your money on yourself. You’ve taken care of them for many years, and you’ve taught them what you could. You gave them an education, food, shelter and support. The responsibility is now theirs to earn their own money.
I will always worry about my children and grandchildren. And I can always teach them more. We will spend our money on ourselves mostly.

Quote:
4. Always buy the best, most beautiful items for your significant other. The key goal is to enjoy your money with your partner. One day one of you will miss the other, and the money will not provide any comfort then, enjoy it together.
No matter what you buy, no matter what you spend, you could have spent more on something closer to "the best, most beautiful".

My wife and I can easily enjoy our life without spending extra money on "the best". IMHO, the key to life is learning what "good enough" means to you. Otherwise, you will always feel that you are missing out by not getting something even better.
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Old 01-07-2018, 10:55 AM   #10
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Good list; food for thought.

I too am curious who the original author is.
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Old 01-07-2018, 01:21 PM   #11
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I don't think everyone should take every item literally as we are all different but I do think the author's main message on the whole was pretty good and we all need to get out and enjoy life.
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Old 01-07-2018, 01:47 PM   #12
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Great Post !
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Old 01-07-2018, 03:21 PM   #13
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Thanks for sharing.
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Old 01-07-2018, 03:34 PM   #14
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Wonderful list, but I do have a problem with the definition of old as well. Mine comes from my grandmother. After she moved into an assisted living apartment she told me that she was getting old. She was 93 yo at the time...
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Old 01-07-2018, 03:48 PM   #15
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Great post, thank you!
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Old 01-07-2018, 03:50 PM   #16
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Nice list. Agree with the general idea. Relax, enjoy life and be happy.
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Old 01-07-2018, 03:51 PM   #17
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What I learned

Quote:
Originally Posted by joeea View Post

I'm 63 and don't think of myself as near old at all.
When I was a kid, the oldest person I knew was my grandmother. From my earliest recollection circa 1964, when she would have been in her early 60s, she was a bent, frail creature who better not go outside during a strong wind. My conclusion at age 5 was that once you hit 60, you were so old you would be lucky to be this side of the dirt.

Fast forwarding five decades, and today I observe 70-year-olds climbing Mt Everest and people in their 80s running marathons. (Neither of those will be me, BTW.) These days, people aren't just living longer, they are robust a lot longer than ever.

In 1963, yeah, 63 was old. In 2018, 63 isn't old at all.

Quote:
Originally Posted by joeea View Post

I will always worry about my children and grandchildren.
It won't matter if your children HAVE grandchildren. You'll never stop worrying about them. You could hit 125, and your kids will be 100, you'll still worry about them. My anecdote about this revelation will take a long time to type, so I'll spare you having to read it. Just trust me.
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Old 01-07-2018, 04:43 PM   #18
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A well rounded list of considerations. Thanks OP. No desire to nitpick.
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Old 01-07-2018, 05:25 PM   #19
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Old 01-07-2018, 05:41 PM   #20
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I like it. A lot of good attitude to have.

About 65 being old, heck I am 61 and I feel old. Just come down from the roof, and I am not as surefooted as I was 10 years ago. Not at all overweight (BMI of 23.5), but I am way past my prime. Plantar fasciitis is coming back too. Darn!

But a lot of people are doing worse, health wise or financial wise. I cannot complain.
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