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Old 02-07-2012, 12:19 PM   #241
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Ah, the road ahead!
Sounds good.

You: stiff upper lip
Him: quivering lower lip
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Old 02-07-2012, 01:24 PM   #242
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Did you say he was going to counseling? Is he still going?
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Old 02-07-2012, 01:39 PM   #243
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Did you say he was going to counseling? Is he still going?
Yes, he's been going every week for the past 8 weeks or so, and his therapist ramped him up to 2 sessions this week and possibly for the foreseeable future. It's really been helping him and he wishes he would have gone years ago.
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Old 02-07-2012, 02:35 PM   #244
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They have rented an apartment together and were supposed to move in Feb 4. He rented a U-Haul and moved her into their apartment, then he came to our house to get his stuff. However, he couldn't do it, as he said that he never loved her, still loves me, finally realized the full impact of what he did, wants to reconcile, can't stop thinking of me, is only happy and clear-headed when I'm around, etc. I told him the choice was no longer his, but he still decided not to move his stuff out. So now they're living together, but he was supposed to bring our bed and TV, so maybe they're sleeping on the floor? Who knows, but he told me his mistress is pretty angry at him right now for not following through. She may be beginning to recognize the "prize" she "won" At least I get a little more time on the Tempurpedic instead of an air mattress!

LOL... it sounds so much like the guy who wants what he is not supposed to have or can not have.... once he gets it... move on to the next thing you want to have...

I think the GF is now learning that being a mistress is different than being a wife or live in partner... because that leaves an opening for someone else to fill...

You are better off without the drama.... as my DW tells me all the time "I want to enjoy life".... you should too....
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Old 02-07-2012, 02:48 PM   #245
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...If all goes well, I should only have to see him two more times -- the day of our divorce, and the day we sell the house....
Do you even have to be there for both of those--can the lawyers just handle these? I mean, it might be too hard for you to stifle the urge to dance around the table and tell him to kiss your grits!

Good luck on the new employment search!
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Old 02-07-2012, 03:11 PM   #246
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Glad to hear you are doing well and continuing to work on your goals. I think you are on a positive path for the future. Good for you!
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Old 02-07-2012, 03:17 PM   #247
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I think you should give him your sessions with the counselor, he needs all the help he can get. Sounds like you have it together at this point, good for you.
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Old 02-07-2012, 03:31 PM   #248
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Thanks for the update Marathoner. Sounds like you have things very much under control which is great.
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Old 02-07-2012, 03:37 PM   #249
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Thanks for the update Marathoner. Sounds like you have things very much under control which is great.
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Old 02-07-2012, 04:19 PM   #250
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Sounds like things are progressing really well. Glad you have rediscovered that spending time with your friends makes you happy.

Good luck with the rest of the divorce, and the job hunt.
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Old 02-07-2012, 06:29 PM   #251
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Congratulations on taking control of your life. Thank your lucky stars that you don't have children together.

Your description of your soon to be former husband reminded me of a former suitor. I thought 'There but for the grace of God would have gone I.'
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Old 02-07-2012, 09:26 PM   #252
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He was emotionally abusive. I always thought he was joking, so I didn't think I took him seriously, but since this has happened and I am no longer walking on eggshells, I realize I must have internalized some of his abuse. My therapist told me I'm such a "glass half full" person that if I were in a concentration camp, I'd be rationalizing why it wasn't so bad, so I need to work on recognizing red flags to make sure I don't get involved in such a bad relationship again!
Coming from someone who was engaged to a woman who had some equally bad, severely negative traits, I can completely relate with the "walking on eggshells" and "rationalizing why ______ isn't so bad".

Congrats on your awakening! Enjoy life again...and remember that you don't deserve to be in a relationship with someone that puts you through that again (took me two engagements to finally wise up. ).
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Old 02-07-2012, 09:52 PM   #253
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Sounds like things are progressing really well. Glad you have rediscovered that spending time with your friends makes you happy.

Good luck with the rest of the divorce, and the job hunt.

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Old 02-07-2012, 10:26 PM   #254
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Thanks for sharing your update. I'm glad that things are working out well for you. I hope the time goes quickly until the divorce and sale of your home is finalized.
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Old 02-07-2012, 11:27 PM   #255
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Old 02-08-2012, 12:13 AM   #256
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Old 02-08-2012, 12:43 AM   #257
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Old 02-08-2012, 08:14 AM   #258
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Old 02-08-2012, 09:13 AM   #259
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Old 02-08-2012, 09:26 AM   #260
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