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Old 06-15-2008, 09:39 PM   #161
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It's not the heat, it's the stupidity .

The board's civility level fluctuates or cycles. Probably one or two malignant messages bring out a piling-on effect. If we over-moderate at the early stages, it inhibits what might be good stuff to come. If we wait too long, well...

Nature of the beast.
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Old 06-16-2008, 08:07 AM   #162
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dex View Post
I'm surprised at some of the postings here also. There can be a million post asking "Do I have enough to retire." or "Should I pay off my mortgage" and there will be many well thought out replies.

TheFed; opens himself up to a group of older people (yes, I knew theFed was on the younger side from his previous posts and he is trying to change his life) looking for advise and he gets hammered by some with their agendas. I don't think it was easy to make his post and when a person is crying out for help one thing to to is not to hurt them. It doesn't motivate a person to seek out help. in their life. Another thing it does is stops the flow of info from the person seeking help just when they need to open up the most.

Withholding your judgment and offering insights or personal experiences for the person to consider is about the best a person can do on a forum. It helps if this is done in a kind and considerate manner. Be there for the person asking for help not for yourself.

One thing I've learned - "First, do no harm."

Something has changed on this board; it is less kind. I get the sense there are more people with agendas and less polite people posting here.
I am completely unsurprised at the lynch mob that formed. Thus far, the masses here seem to have settled for pitch-cropping the fed (if you do not know what pitch-cropping was, go look it up - it wasn't nice), but I could easily see it escalating.

The general tone here has grown nastier and more impersonal in recent months, and signal:noise has been dropping for some time. I am more guarded about what I say now (believe it or not) and make more use of PMs rather than openly posting. I imagine that its only a matter of time...
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Old 06-16-2008, 08:20 AM   #163
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The moderators take user complaints very seriously and deal with them fast and fair, usually by consensus so it's not just one person going off on a user. If you report a post, your name is not revealed to the offending user.

It is very hard to literally "police" every post (there are just a few active mods, though we are growing) so if anyone sees material that is nasty or escalating, please report it. We'll take it from there. It doesn't have to be porn or vulgarity: personal attacks, excessive sarcasm, etc. are fair game. True we often err on the side of letting something pass if it's borderline but once we start getting complaints from other members, we move quickly.

I now return you to your regularly scheduled programming.
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Old 06-16-2008, 08:39 AM   #164
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Quote:
Originally Posted by brewer12345 View Post
The general tone here has grown nastier and more impersonal in recent months, and signal:noise has been dropping for some time. I am more guarded about what I say now (believe it or not) and make more use of PMs rather than openly posting. I imagine that its only a matter of time...
Thanks for that comment. I thought as I have been home for over a month I might have been getting too sensitive or something.
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Old 06-16-2008, 09:38 AM   #165
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dex View Post
Nords,
I did a search on the topics started by Tangomonster and looked at those with "substantive; meaningful" content and some replies. There is a pattern here. Tango starts a topic; might add a trite comment - but usually none - no acknowledgment of the contributions/comments of the posters.

At the best it is impolite towards the people who took the time to post.

There is something strange about it in my mind.

I don't have anyone on my ignore list. This will be the first.
Quote:
Originally Posted by dex View Post
I'm surprised at some of the postings here also. There can be a million post asking "Do I have enough to retire." or "Should I pay off my mortgage" and there will be many well thought out replies.

TheFed; opens himself up to a group of older people (yes, I knew theFed was on the younger side from his previous posts and he is trying to change his life) looking for advise and he gets hammered by some with their agendas. I don't think it was easy to make his post and when a person is crying out for help one thing to to is not to hurt them. It doesn't motivate a person to seek out help. in their life. Another thing it does is stops the flow of info from the person seeking help just when they need to open up the most.

Withholding your judgment and offering insights or personal experiences for the person to consider is about the best a person can do on a forum. It helps if this is done in a kind and considerate manner. Be there for the person asking for help not for yourself.

One thing I've learned - "First, do no harm."

Something has changed on this board; it is less kind. I get the sense there are more people with agendas and less polite people posting here.
Hmmm...
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Old 06-16-2008, 09:52 AM   #166
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Maybe it is time to lock this thread since the Fed left it days ago
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Old 06-16-2008, 09:54 AM   #167
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The personal attacks never fail to surprise me. It seems like there is always someone who can take an innocent comment and turn it around to be something that it is not. I see some of the tall poppy syndrome here, with some attacks on the more prolific posters like Nords & Brewer seemingly just because someone doesn't like them, so regardless of what they say certain people will go for the jugular.

As to Tango doing whatever Tango does, I don't really care. We are all big boys and girls and are able to make the decision whether or not to read or even respond to a post. After my relatively short time here I am able to normally ascertain from a title or the way a thread is going whether or not I want to revisit it.

What does surprise me is people who have made posts in the single digits and are new to the community who jump right in and dogpile. I am not saying you have to have a certain number of posts to be heard, but I know in real life that is not the impression I would want to make on new acquaintances.
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Old 06-17-2008, 01:03 AM   #168
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