HAPPY CANADA DAY

[bruce1]

EAT YOUR HEART OUT WORLD.......

SO, WHAT DO CANADIANS HAVE TO BE PROUD OF?



1. Smarties

2. Crispy Crunch, Coffee Crisp

3. The size of our footballs fields and one less down

4. Baseball is Canadian

5. Lacrosse is Canadian

6. Hockey is Canadian

7. Basketball is Canadian

8. Apple pie is Canadian

9. Mr. Dress-up kicks Mr. Rogers ass

10. Tim Hortons kicks Krispy Kreme's ass

11. Canada has the largest French population that never surrendered to Germany.

12. We have the largest English population that never ever surrendered or withdrew during any war to anyone. anywhere. EVER.

13. Our civil war was fought in a bar and it lasted a little over an hour.

14. The only person who was arrested in our civil war was an American mercenary, who slept in and missed the whole thing... but showed up just in time to get caught.

15. We knew plaid was cool far before Seattle caught on.

16. The Hudsons Bay Company once owned over 10% of the earth's surface and is still around as the worlds oldest company.

17. The average dog sled team can kill and devour a full grown human in under 3 minutes.

18. We still know what to do with all the parts of a buffalo.

19. We invented ski-doos, jet-skis, velcro and zippers.

20. We also invented  insulin, penicillin, zambonis, the telephone and short wave radios that save countless lives each year.

21. We ALL have frozen our tongues to something metal and lived to tell about it.

22. A Canadian invented Superman.

23. We have coloured money.

24. Our beer advertisments kick ass

BUT MOST IMPORTANT!


25. The handles on our beer cases are big enough to fit your hands with mitts on. OOOoohhhhh Canada!!


oh yeah... and our elections only take one day.



I AM CANADIAN!!!

HAPPY FOURTH TO OUR AMERICAN FRIENDS TOO

 

[Mr._johngalt]

I am not too sure inventing skidoos and jet skis is anything to
boast about BTW, Hudson's Bay may be the oldest company
but I think Berreta is the oldest continuous manufacturing company.

JG

 

[unclemick]

We ARE going to save the Canadian jokes for those long winter days/nights in Missoula - and take the summer off - now aren't we!

Heh, heh, heh.

Canada Day? Other countries have holidays?

 

[REWahoo]

23. We have coloured money.

.....and apparently an excess of vowels since they add a few extra into some words to use them up.

People actually live way up there? Amazing.

Happy C-day, Bruce1

REW

 

[JPatrick]

So there I was sitting in the bar with my boss and coworkers.

He says::I have an announcement!
I'm being transferred to Toronto:

A voice from the back of the room shouts out.
TORONTO?  HOW CRAPPY,, ALL THEY GOT IN TORONTO IS HOCKEY PLAYERS AND PROSTITUTES.

My boss replies:: Hey guys, my wife is from Toronto.

To which I quickly yell (to save the day)

Great Boss, what position does she play?

 

[tryan]

Canadian beer is awsome ... have to give you that one.

Haven't had a Brador yet this year ... but should make to the 1000 islands this fall. Can't wait!

 

[Mr._johngalt]

So there I was sitting in the bar with my boss and coworkers.

He says::I have an announcement!
I'm being transferred to Toronto:

A voice from the back of the room shouts out.
TORONTO?  HOW CRAPPY,, ALL THEY GOT IN TORONTO IS HOCKEY PLAYERS AND PROSTITUTES.

My boss replies:: Hey guys, my wife is from Toronto.

To which I quickly yell (to save the day)

Great Boss, what position does she play?

That is an old joke (we used Green Bay, Wisc)

When I took a job in Detroit, a lot of people said
"You must be nuts!" I kind of liked it. Of course, I lived
way out in the upscale suburbs. Anyway, my Detroit
years provided a lot of good stories.

JG

 

[JPatrick]

That is an old joke (we used Green Bay, Wisc) 

When I took a job in Detroit, a lot of people said
"You must be nuts!"  I kind of liked it.  Of course, I lived
way out in the upscale suburbs.  Anyway, my Detroit
years provided a lot of good stories.

JG

OK, So what position did you play??

 

[cute fuzzy bunny]

9. Mr. Dress-up kicks Mr. Rogers ass

I'd like to see him try out Captain Kangaroo as he started into his second six-pack...

18. We still know what to do with all the parts of a buffalo.

Ok, I've got three jokes right off the top of my head. Two of them definitely not for the under 18 crowd, the other one...probably unsuitable for anyone.

 

[JPatrick]

[quote

21. We ALL have frozen our tongues to something metal and lived to tell about it.




Yeah I guess that's what's different about us silly American's.
Most of the one's I know would watch the first dude freeze his tongue, have a good laugh at his expense and then move on.

 

[cute fuzzy bunny]

Not until after you pants'ed him.

 

[Zipper]

Have a good one Bruce.

I'll add Ontario produces more vehicles than Michigan. Toyota just announced a new assembly plant at Woodstock, half an hour from London. Going to build RAV 4's and Scions.

Prime A1 cropland. Corn, soybeans, orchards and vegetables.

Comparable to Northern Ohio, Southern Michigan, Northern Illinois & Southern Wiconsin (JG )

Lotsa' water!

 

[Ed_The_Gypsy]

Tim Horton's is owned by Wendy's and has been for years. (Most Canadians don't remember that Tim was a hockey player who killed himself in his Ferrari on the QE one day.)

Molson ("I am a Canadian!") is now owned by Coors.

I am flying back up to Ft McMurray today to continue taking a job away from a Canadian. It's my turn.

Gypsy