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He said "You're what, 64?" - I answered I'll be 62 in July.
01-23-2016, 05:13 AM
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#1
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 1,867
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He said "You're what, 64?" - I answered I'll be 62 in July.
He said "your what 64" - I answered I'll be 62 in July. I was chatting about my plans on retiring this July. He was sitting across from me in physical therapy "I've got 22 years on you and I say work as long as you can - just reading books doesn't cut it" yikes! It was clear he wasn't enjoying his retirement. I didn't give it too much thought until later in the day when I heard a 'retired' caller to one of my favorite radio shows echo those same sentiments. Double yikes.
It got me to thinking about my plans in retirement and the formula for contentment
1) change the paradigm (move south - blizzard out there as I write this - the wind is howling - it will be a miracle if we don't lose power)
2) stay busy - part time job, volunteer, hobbies
3) exercise
4) travel and see some of the country
5) read - just read Rouge Lawyer by Grisham couldn't put it down.
I am generally a pretty happy person and enjoy the simple things. I must admit to a bit of worry when I hear all the negativity from retirees. What's the magic formula?
Sent from my iPad using Early Retirement Forum.
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01-23-2016, 05:38 AM
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#2
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 8,368
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Contentment, IMHO, comes from within rather than from without.
__________________
"Exit, pursued by a bear."
The Winter's Tale, William Shakespeare
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01-23-2016, 06:26 AM
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#3
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 12,597
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He's in PT. Maybe he hurts and isn't really thinking straight just now. Likes to be physical, can't be, = boredom.
He's 84. Maybe "I wish I was back at work" is his version of the dementia trope, "I want to go home," which I've read really means, "I want to be the way I used to be."
I hear you on the snow. We have 14 inches so far and the wind is blowing sideways.
Quote:
Originally Posted by rayinpenn
He said "your what 64" - I answered I'll be 62 in July. I was chatting about my plans on retiring this July. He was sitting across from me in physical therapy "I've got 22 years on you and I say work as long as you can - just reading books doesn't cut it" yikes! It was clear he wasn't enjoying his retirement. I didn't give it too much thought until later in the day when I heard a 'retired' caller to one of my favorite radio shows echo those same sentiments. Double yikes.
It got me to thinking about my plans in retirement and the formula for contentment
1) change the paradigm (move south - blizzard out there as I write this - the wind is howling - it will be a miracle if we don't lose power)
2) stay busy - part time job, volunteer, hobbies
3) exercise
4) travel and see some of the country
5) read - just read Rouge Lawyer by Grisham couldn't put it down.
I am generally a pretty happy person and enjoy the simple things. I must admit to a bit of worry when I hear all the negativity from retirees. What's the magic formula?
Sent from my iPad using Early Retirement Forum.
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__________________
If you understood everything I say, you'd be me ~ Miles Davis
'There is only one success – to be able to spend your life in your own way.’ Christopher Morley.
Even a blind clock finds an acorn twice a day.
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01-23-2016, 06:34 AM
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#4
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Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 22,973
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I could easily be wrong, but it seems to me that people who are unhappy in retirement were probably unhappy before retirement.
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Living an analog life in the Digital Age.
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01-23-2016, 06:39 AM
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#5
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Fair Lawn
Posts: 2,940
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gumby
I could easily be wrong, but it seems to me that people who are unhappy in retirement were probably unhappy before retirement.
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+1 Agree.
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01-23-2016, 06:41 AM
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#6
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 1,867
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gumby
I could easily be wrong, but it seems to me that people who are unhappy in retirement were probably unhappy before retirement.
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Of course I hope you are right; I feel you have to work at being happy...
Sent from my iPad using Early Retirement Forum.
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01-23-2016, 06:44 AM
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#7
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Full time employment: Posting here.
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Houston
Posts: 957
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Could be that he's telling you exactly what he feels and what is reality for him - some people enjoy the interactions and challenges of work more than the things they choose to do in retirement.
We all are different. I always find it interesting how often we don't take what others say as true representations of their feelings and instead come up with stories of what they "really mean" based on our own feelings. We each need to understand what drives us personally and make decisions for our own lives with that knowledge. ER is great for some of us. But maybe the wrong decision for others.
Sent from my iPhone using Early Retirement Forum
__________________
"Learn everyday, but especially from the experiences of others. It's cheaper! " - John Bogle
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01-23-2016, 06:48 AM
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#8
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Recycles dryer sheets
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 441
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nemo2
Contentment, IMHO, comes from within rather than from without.
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+1
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01-23-2016, 06:51 AM
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#9
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Madeira Beach Fl
Posts: 1,403
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Or, he didn't finish his sentence. "Work as long as you can (stand it)".
__________________
_______________________________________________
"A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and goes to bed at night and in between does what he wants to do" --Bob Dylan.
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01-23-2016, 06:59 AM
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#10
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: On a hill in the Pine Barrens
Posts: 9,686
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Leaving the cold weather region probably adds years to your life. That's my first thought as inches of snow are piling up.
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01-23-2016, 06:59 AM
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#11
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Recycles dryer sheets
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: Southfield
Posts: 58
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It gets back to: are you retiring "to" something or "away" from something? If you are simply frustrated with the w#rk you do, then it makes sense to consider a change in job or even careers. For years I considered what twilight careers might interest me, knowing in my technical field I would get to a point that I would struggle to keep up. Over the last few years I spent more time exploring what retirement would look like to me. Not what would keep me busy, but what things I've wanted to spend time on that w#rking held me back from. We now know where we'll live, what we'll do and what budget we need to do those things. With that plan complete we'll ER at the end of 2016. We'll be retiring *to* a fulfilling and rewarding retirement. I'm not sure I'll even have a lot of time to read books <wink>!
__________________
The best way to predict the future is to invent it. - Alan Kay
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01-23-2016, 07:00 AM
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#12
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Full time employment: Posting here.
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 982
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I am 59 and have been retired for almost 8 years with no regrets (other than wishing I had been able to retire sooner). Why would anyone choose work over the freedom to do whatever they want 100% of the time? It just doesn't compute unless $$$ is an issue.
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01-23-2016, 07:10 AM
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#13
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: SF East Bay
Posts: 4,324
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rayinpenn
Of course I hope you are right; I feel you have to work at being happy...
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I'm going to disagree with you slightly here. I don't think there's much work involved in being happy, it being more of a basic disposition, IMO. As others have said, there are all sorts of opinions about retirement. Just because he's not enjoying himself doesn't mean that you wouldn't. Don't let others' feelings about their own situations deter you.
My main concern when I stopped working was whether I'd have a sufficient stash to provide adequate living expenses for the duration. As much as I enjoyed my career (and was very driven during it), not once did I consider whether I'd be bored if I didn't have a job. I mean, how awful can having the freedom to do whatever you want actually be? My gosh, it sounds like absolute torture
__________________
Contentedly ER, with 3 furry friends (now, sadly, 1).
Planning my escape to the wide open spaces in my campervan (with my remaining kitty, of course!)
On a mission to become the world's second most boring man.
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01-23-2016, 07:42 AM
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#14
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: Michigan
Posts: 4,962
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I think everyone is an individual and that the time to RE for one person is not the time for another. I also know of people who are not happy in retirement but I think I know of more that wish they had done it sooner. If you are FI and have a plan then you do not need to second guess that. It's just fitters.
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"The mountains are calling, and I must go." John Muir
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01-23-2016, 07:48 AM
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#15
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Moderator
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: San Diego
Posts: 14,169
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I had a little bit of worry about whether I'd be bored, unfulfilled, whatever in retirement... mainly because DH had expressed his worry about that to me.
Turns out I'm pretty shallow and had no issues at all when the challenge of work was removed. I find plenty to keep my mind occupied. I'm healthier because I no longer can tell myself "I don't have time to work out", "I don't have time to cook from scratch", etc...
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Retired June 2014. No longer an enginerd - now I'm just a nerd.
micro pensions 6%, rental income 20%
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01-23-2016, 07:54 AM
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#16
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Moderator Emeritus
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 17,773
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Major Tom
I'm going to disagree with you slightly here. I don't think there's much work involved in being happy, it being more of a basic disposition, IMO.
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+1. And someone who has to work at being happy would probably be happier being unhappy.
__________________
“Would you like an adventure now, or would you like to have your tea first?” J.M. Barrie, Peter Pan
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01-23-2016, 07:55 AM
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#17
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Toronto
Posts: 3,320
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gumby
I could easily be wrong, but it seems to me that people who are unhappy in retirement were probably unhappy before retirement.
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Sounds right, along with the statements about contentment. These days with all the recent deaths of people in their late 60s I wouldn't have thought that I would want to take the chance of working that long. Happy to have hung it up. There are still many, many things to do which bring me satisfaction and fulfillment.
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01-23-2016, 07:57 AM
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#18
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Dec 2015
Posts: 2,232
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rodi
I had a little bit of worry about whether I'd be bored, unfulfilled, whatever in retirement... mainly because DH had expressed his worry about that to me.
Turns out I'm pretty shallow and had no issues at all when the challenge of work was removed. I find plenty to keep my mind occupied. I'm healthier because I no longer can tell myself "I don't have time to work out", "I don't have time to cook from scratch", etc...
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I think I must be shallow, too.
To the OP,as far as the old guy in PT, put his words in the big file labelled "unsolicited advice"...who knows where he's coming from, but he sure isn't you. Give it some thought, see if it resonates...then do your own thing.
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01-23-2016, 07:59 AM
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#19
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Moderator Emeritus
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: New Orleans
Posts: 47,473
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Before I retired, I made a list of a couple of dozen things I wanted to do after I retired. Grow roses, learn Mexican Spanish, get an MBA, complete the Crescent City Classic (New Orleans 10K race), write a book, and so on.
By now I am in my 7th year of retirement, and I haven't done any of them. I doubt I ever will, and that's OK. Retirement has been too busy and too much fun to need that list. I can say with confidence that I have never been bored for even one day in retirement (5 minutes, maybe, but one day? no way!). I think that it helps to have some initiative.
Still, having the list on my computer desktop was a nice security blanket.
__________________
Already we are boldly launched upon the deep; but soon we shall be lost in its unshored, harbourless immensities. - - H. Melville, 1851.
Happily retired since 2009, at age 61. Best years of my life by far!
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01-23-2016, 08:08 AM
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#20
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 1,019
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gumby
I could easily be wrong, but it seems to me that people who are unhappy in retirement were probably unhappy before retirement.
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Probably a strong correlation, but plenty of exceptions.
Someone who was (relatively) happy while w*rking can become lost and depressed in retirement if they don't take the initiative to create a fulfilling retirement, or become even happier if they do take the initiative.
Conversely, someone who was unhappy while w*rking can become much more fulfilled and content in retirement, if they take the initiative to create a fulfilling retirement. This is me, and probably the majority on this forum. Or they can stay unhappy if they don't grasp the opportunity retirement affords.
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