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Old 04-15-2011, 11:05 AM   #21
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I decided just to keep my wienies the way it is...

Boy do we need a that's all folks for this thread
You wish.

Now, everyone knows the peril of opening any matter up for discussions at a forum frequented by people who have nothing to do all day.

We shall not lay the wienies matter to rest and need to get to the bottom of this possible fraudulent scheme.
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Old 04-15-2011, 11:17 AM   #22
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Now, everyone knows the peril of opening any matter up for discussions at a forum frequented by people who have nothing to do all day.
What's the wurst that could happen?
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Old 04-15-2011, 11:47 AM   #23
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For once, ever since I joined this forum, I just cannot think of a comment to top what I'm reading. Put this one in the record books.

You guys are priceless!
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Old 04-15-2011, 12:25 PM   #24
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I think you should start your letter of complaint as follows:

Dear CEO of Mega-foods:

Recently I purchased a package of XYZ wieners from ABC grocery store. As I am a frugal shopper, I decided to split up the pack and freeze some. Imagine my surprise when the package only contained 22 instead of the 24 wieners the label stated were inside! I do not know if this was an oversight or a way to cut costs, but suffice it to say, it got my undies in a bundle which in turn made my wiener uncomfortable.

So, I would like a coupon for a free package of XYZ wieners sent to me ASAP. I am not afraid to say I am a real wiener lover, and have been that way since I was a kid. This event has left me traumatized, and I almost ready to give up wieners for life. The ball is your court. I am merely trying to reach a wiener-wiener situation.

Regards,

John Doe
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Old 04-15-2011, 01:19 PM   #25
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I think you should start your letter of complaint as follows:

Dear CEO of Mega-foods:

Recently I purchased a package of XYZ wieners from ABC grocery store. As I am a frugal shopper, I decided to split up the pack and freeze some. Imagine my surprise when the package only contained 22 instead of the 24 wieners the label stated were inside! I do not know if this was an oversight or a way to cut costs, but suffice it to say, it got my undies in a bundle which in turn made my wiener uncomfortable.

So, I would like a coupon for a free package of XYZ wieners sent to me ASAP. I am not afraid to say I am a real wiener lover, and have been that way since I was a kid. This event has left me traumatized, and I almost ready to give up wieners for life. The ball is your court. I am merely trying to reach a wiener-wiener situation.

Regards,

John Doe
Dear Mr. Dough,

We are in receipt of your letter complaining about the size of our package. We appreciate your wiener worries and apologize if you feel we shorted you. Recently we uncovered an issue with our wiener stuffers. Although this issue did not affect our product quality, the machinery that pulls othe product off the line for wrapping would occasionally jerk off a wiener or two. (the problem is not the meat, it's the motion) Apparently this resulted in what we refer to as shrinkage, (reducing the numbers of wieners in the package). You obviously got a smaller package than than you expected, and on behalf of all of us guys here at XYZ, I apologize and ask you to let us try again soon. We are really proud of our wieners and sausages here at XYZ , and hope to provide you with a more satisfying experience next time. Please accept the enclosed coupons for XYZ products, including our full line of Polish and German sausages, which many of our customers prefer over smaller wieners.

Regards,

Frank N. Furter
CEO, Wieners-R-US
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Old 04-15-2011, 01:28 PM   #26
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Ever so often, the opportunity arises to practice using the Ignore list.

Listen to that... The giggling stopped...The silence is wonderful
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Old 04-15-2011, 01:32 PM   #27
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It just goes to show you gotta watch yer wiener playing around with that vacuum thingy...
I agree; If you don't watch yourself, that could really suck ...
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Old 04-15-2011, 01:35 PM   #28
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Ever so often, the opportunity arises to practice using the Ignore list
Just havin' a little fun..............
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Old 04-15-2011, 01:39 PM   #29
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Ever so often, the opportunity arises to practice using the Ignore list.
You're going to ignore your own thread?
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Old 04-15-2011, 03:17 PM   #30
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You wish.

Now, everyone knows the peril of opening any matter up for discussions at a forum frequented by people who have nothing to do all day.

We shall not lay the wienies matter to rest and need to get to the bottom of this possible fraudulent scheme.

Am I parsing this right.... you are trying to get to a bottom with your weiner.....
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Old 04-15-2011, 03:45 PM   #31
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You're going to ignore your own thread?
Now that we have thoroughly corrupted his thread, the OP is distancing himself and disowning his thread.

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Am I parsing this right.... you are trying to get to a bottom with your weiner.....
Eh, I didn't say that, you did.
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Old 04-15-2011, 05:36 PM   #32
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Am I parsing this right.... you are trying to get to a bottom with your weiner.....
It was dark, I was drunk...
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Old 04-17-2011, 08:41 PM   #33
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I just have to say that it takes a real man to admit he's disappointed in the size of his package (of weiners).
Kudos to you!
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