How do you LBYM?

[Mr. Tightwad]

Things I don't pay for: gasoline, cable or whatever, haircuts, or beverages.
I know where all the free food sample places are near me (3 of them, TJ's, Bristol Farms and Costco).

The last time I turned on the heat was Dec of '16. I never have turned on AC in my life. Socal temps allow that. It is a bit warm in August. My utility bills are miniscule.

I went about 35 years without buying a shirt. I have about 75 shirts in the closet still, because I get them free from 10K races. In the past year or so, I did purchase about 5 long sleeve running shirts (New balance/Nike) to wear over the free but rather old looking ones whenever I'm out in public. I line dry so clothes last a long time. Like somebody else mentioned I still wear my free work shirts, but only under my 80's sweaters in the winter.

I'm pretty good with coupons. I can occasionally use the coupon then talk the employee to give it back to me to use again later. I don't like Vons for several reasons, but when I do go there I can get them to discount stuff about 50% of the time. I make sure the cashiers always like me.

When my daughters were in strollers I used to go to Ruby's diner. I would use 3 different coupons each time. A buy one breakfast get one free, a free shake (came with purchase of a gift card) for dessert that night, and a third discount that was a scratcher so the item varied. They allowed me to do this for like 3 years.

Speaking of gift cards, Panera and other places I frequent has the buy a $25 gift card, get $10 free card with it. I always hit that promo hard. I calculate how many times I will eat there for free (the $10 cards have an expiration date) and then buy the amount of gift cards to get that amount of free ones. This year I bought record high $1200 in gift cards for Panera. Ate for free there during the "free" period, then working my way through the ones I purchased. I do that every year at 2 or 3 chains. When you buy that large amount of gift cards, I usually score a few freebies thrown in.

I do spend $. I bought 2 expensive cars last year, and the big screen Apple desktop I'm typing this post on. I'll keep them til they drop dead. I just usually find a way to avoid spending much, if at all.

 

[The Cosmic Avenger]

Things I don't pay for: gasoline, cable or whatever, haircuts, or beverages.

Not bad! I was going to ask if you use public transit/taxis/rideshares everywhere, but then you finished with:

I do spend $. I bought 2 expensive cars last year, and the big screen Apple desktop I'm typing this post on. I'll keep them til they drop dead. I just usually find a way to avoid spending much, if at all.

So how do you manage that? The rest of us penny pinchers want to know!

 

[ckelly78z]

-My wife cuts my hair with electric clippers, and the 1/2" attachment,
-I wear clothes until they have holes in them (mostly jeans/sweatshirts).
-I change oil, and do small repairs on all of my vehicles.
-I do all the remodeling/plumbing/carpentry work.
-I cut/split/stack/burn 5 cords a year with no other heat source.
-My wife is a wonderful cook, with most meals at home.
-I take leftovers/a soda pop, an apple in my lunch box to work.
-We did all of the catering/decorating/setup/teardown for my daughter's recent wedding.
-We comparison shop after research/no retail therapy.
-We camp/hike/bike rather than expensive hotels.
-We drive 15 year old high mileage cars.
-We DIY almost everything, and almost NEVER "call the guy".
-I mow both my 5 acres, and my daughter's 1 acre, and maintain my own equipment.

 

[Pellice]

The Atlantic has an article up right now theorizing that income-segregated communities normalize excessive spending (paywall after a few free articles): https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2019/10/why-financial-confessionals-viral/600358/

But can't people think back to their childhoods? Not that many of us were rich when we were kids. Also, the ability to accurately characterize your spending as Required, Needed, and Wanted helps a lot.

I'll contribute something for females - I find professional manicures a good example of something that went from "Never" in my childhood to "Required" now. I myself don't get manicures - to spend $20 or $25 per week when you can buy a bottle of nail polish for $1.99 at the drugstore?? No way. And yet, many, perhaps the majority, of my peers, go to nail salons, and apparently consider this a necessity. Even the ones who used to say it was "professionally" required, and are now retired still go, even the ones who claim to be watching their budget. And the ante gets upped as to what goes on the nails, because just applying some nail polish doesn't sufficiently demonstrate separation from the masses who are just applying their own at home. Thus, patterns, gewgaws, tip decorations.

I think of it as an example of lifestyle creep. But I have my own weaknesses (just bought some beautiful all-clad cookwear).

 

[Aerides]

I'll contribute something for females - I find professional manicures a good example of something that went from "Never" in my childhood to "Required" now. I myself don't get manicures - to spend $20 or $25 per week when you can buy a bottle of nail polish for $1.99 at the drugstore?? No way. And yet, many, perhaps the majority, of my peers, go to nail salons, and apparently consider this a necessity.

I hardly ever paid for manicures while working. Never seemed worth it to me as I'd have a scrape or scratch before I got to my car, and even a great manicure never lasts a week for me. I do these myself.
Pedicure, now that is worth it - last at least 2 weeks for me and more of a luxury experience. The results from a good nail place or spa are better than I can do.

I have cut and colored my own hair since high school. My now-graying-roots try to show up every 2 weeks so if I was paying for it I would have to keep working!

I pay attention to bogos and good sales, particularly on groceries, and when I'm shopping online I will find a coupon, use ebates, or camelcamel and hold off for the best price.

Never had a housekeeper though most everyone else I worked with did.

We call and threaten to cancel the cable every year and get a special rate that becomes a no brainer. Same for my car sirius service ($5 a month instead of $15).

Oh and I also have a soft spot for All-clad, but all of my pieces were from homegoods and/or on sale.

 

[Walt34]

I agree that it's more of a lifestyle choice and there are multiple ways to LBYM. Yes, I'm one of the ones who wears jeans until DW is past embarrassment and insists that I break down and buy new ones. Ditto shoes.

But I'll spend on good tools, sometimes for one that I'm pretty sure I'll use infrequently or even only once if having the job done will cost more than the tool, because when I'm done, the job is done, and I have a new [-]toy[/-] tool to show for it. For example, a while back I spent ~$130 on an electric caulking gun, a purchase that two years ago I would have sneered at. But arthritis in my hands means that I'd have to hire someone to do that job with a $4 hand powered caulking gun that I already had. But the electric one means that it'll still be a while before I have to hire someone to do caulking. So that makes it cost-effective, and LBYM.

A lot depends on what the person values - someone commented that they don't spend much on housing. We do because we value a nice place to live, but we don't value travel, so we spend virtually nothing on that, nice hotels, or high end restaurant meals. Many people spend gobs of money on travel and restaurants and that's a good thing, because having choices is a good thing. What's bad is when you don't have choices.

 

[LRDave]

I started playing wilson chaos golf balls - they are about $15 for 2 dozen

Now THAT'S takin' one for the team.....

 

[Just_Steve]

Oops, wrong thread. LBYM is not for me.

+1

 

[LRDave]

I am going to do my 50-hour service on my sub-compact tractor. (gulp)

I need to get grease and a grease gun and buy oil and hydraulic fluid. TBH, this is less about saving money (which it surely will - quite a lot if a dealer did it) - it is more about not having to load the tractor on the trailer and and take it to the tractor dealership. The loading/unloading, drive and backing the trailer are unnerving....

 

[gerntz]

If washing car yourself is a mentionable factor in LBYM, you don't spend anything. Do you slaughter your own meats?

 

[6miths]

No house cleaner. No yard service. Wash/wax/detail own car - or don't. Bring plants in for winter. Don't drink alcohol. No bottled water. No Starbucks or the like. Never buy retail - often thrift store for clothes (not underwear, socks or jeans). Use Costco gas/food/other. Take lunch/cooler when I go places. Drive instead of fly if reasonable. Never buy lottery tickets. Don't smoke.

 

[HI Bill]

So many things!

1. Pay myself first. Max out the 401(k) contribution. Max out the spousal IRA contribution. On each pay day, I transfer all $ not anticipated to be needed for the next two weeks to savings.
2. Subtract each credit card purchase from my checking account as the purchases are made; that way, when the bill comes due, all I have to is check off the deductions, and I know how much I've spent for the month.
3. Bike to the office; with commuter benefits, my bike maintenance and repairs are free! Also get a free bus pass!
4. Company pays for my cell phone.
5. DIY VG investor (low fees).
6. My wife and I give each other haircuts. In the past 21 years, I've paid for maybe 4 haircuts.
7. Bring lunches to the office; eat free during company-sponsored brown bag lunches.
8. My scuba diving insurance and regulator overhauls are paid for by my company.
9. Line-dry clothes (this one is involuntary, as our apartment doesn't have a 220V hook-up for a dryer).
10. Make our own bread and pasta from scratch.
11. Do all my own plumbing, electrical, and home repairs (except appliance repair), lay my own tile and wood flooring.
12. Only have Starbucks when at airports.
13. Fly coach (ugh).
14. Keep cars for 8-10 years +. Don't buy luxury brand cars.
15. Get many of our electronics, clothes, household goods, cosmetics, toiletries, etc., for just their tax value to review. This saves us thousands a year in purchases.
16. Clean our own house.
17. Wash and wax our car.
18. Eat out only a few times a month.
19. Used streaming and Netflix for more than 6 years (no cable fees!).
20. Never buy anything on credit, unless it's a 0 interest loan (pay off credit cards in full every month).
21. Buy groceries mostly at COSTCO and Sam's Club (huge savings).
22. Buy gas at COSTCO.
23. Hem some of my own clothes.
24. Minimize alcohol purchases when eating out.
25. Shop Nordstrom Rack, rather than retail.
26. Never gamble.
27. Don't smoke.
28. Only upgrade phones every 4 years or so.
29. Build my own computers (not sure if this saves any $).
30. Build much of my own furniture.

All of that said, it doesn't sound like we have much fun, but it's not true! We travel a bunch, scuba dive around the world, take photos above and underwater, fly a drone, and enjoy watching movies on a 10-foot screen! We also will FIRE next year, made possible by LBYM! Our travel budget is going up by 500%!

 

[RobbieB]

No butler, maid or chauffeur.
No limousine
No hotel suites over 1000 sq-ft
No country club, no yacht club
No yacht
No aircraft or pilot
No hookers, no blow

 

[Souschef]

A lot depends on what the person values - someone commented that they don't spend much on housing. We do because we value a nice place to live, but we don't value travel, so we spend virtually nothing on that, nice hotels, or high end restaurant meals. Many people spend gobs of money on travel and restaurants and that's a good thing, because having choices is a good thing. What's bad is when you don't have choices.

That really sums it up!

 

[Red Badger]

I agree that it's more of a lifestyle choice and there are multiple ways to LBYM. Yes, I'm one of the ones who wears jeans until DW is past embarrassment and insists that I break down and buy new ones. Ditto shoes.

But I'll spend on good tools, sometimes for one that I'm pretty sure I'll use infrequently or even only once if having the job done will cost more than the tool, because when I'm done, the job is done, and I have a new [-]toy[/-] tool to show for it. For example, a while back I spent ~$130 on an electric caulking gun, a purchase that two years ago I would have sneered at. But arthritis in my hands means that I'd have to hire someone to do that job with a $4 hand powered caulking gun that I already had. But the electric one means that it'll still be a while before I have to hire someone to do caulking. So that makes it cost-effective, and LBYM.

A lot depends on what the person values - someone commented that they don't spend much on housing. We do because we value a nice place to live, but we don't value travel, so we spend virtually nothing on that, nice hotels, or high end restaurant meals. Many people spend gobs of money on travel and restaurants and that's a good thing, because having choices is a good thing. What's bad is when you don't have choices.

+1 on the tools.

However, our house is enough for us, but only limited company. We like it that way. When sibs/in-laws/outlaws come to stay, we just put 'em up at one of the nearby hotels. Our modest home lets us spend more on travel and other experiences.

But yeah - - - choices..... Choices make life more gooder.

 

[Amethyst]

I buy good used stuff, mostly online. Clothing, dead people's used jewelry (marketed as 'estate'), even furniture. I probably still get ripped off, but nothing as bad as the cost of buying new. If I'm buying more than one used item at a time, I often ask for a small discount.

Oh, and we love art, but don't love the prices. So I make my own art to decorate the home.

Also, we rarely eat out. We can eat well for a week (or more) on the cost of one restaurant meal. And we aren't getting all that fat and salt.

 

[calmloki]

....
Be forewarned, doing these things well enough and long enough will create a situation where you have more money than you need, and at that point it will be difficult for you to waste money just to use it up. If you were raised to be responsible, you will have a new job of managing a large pile of money. Maybe you will find useful ways to use it. This is sort of a problem for me, but a fortunate one to have. It's not really one that you can get much sympathy for, obviously.

Did a report in Quicken this morning for our YTD spend on the Oregon and SoCal houses and our expenses (not rental or business but just personal). Our Federal and State taxes were over 1/2 of our spend. Our net worth increased by about 5 times our YTD spend. SecondCor521 got it exactly right.

 

[Squirrel]

I go to the beauty school for hair cuts and color. They take a little longer, but I've been happy with the results.

After seeing a nutritionist, DH takes many small dishes for his lunch and grazes throughout the day. So, every morning I pack him

3 proteins
1 oatmeal
1 vegetable
1 fruit
milk
yogurt

 

[Mr. Tightwad]

Not bad! I was going to ask if you use public transit/taxis/rideshares everywhere, but then you finished with:

So how do you manage that? The rest of us penny pinchers want to know!

I believe you are asking how do I not buy gasoline after buying 2 new cars?

Both are electric. One qualifies for free electricity, so I never charge it at home.

I went to Bristol Farms tonight with the GF. Sourdough bread with apple butter, some meat that I never heard of, two types of cheese that were delicious. I skipped several other available offerings. They are very generous over there. About half the time GF buys something she likes as she did tonight.

 

[jollystomper]

Our main method for LBYM was having a budget to give us a high desired savings rate, and sticking to it. For example, if we hit our groceries limit before month end, we simply stopped buying groceries and ate what from what we had stocked up. Aso, as others mentioned, DIY for repairs as much as possible. We also bartered at times - for example, we had a friend who was good at basic plumbing repairs and diagnostics, he helped us avoid major bills several times and I helped him with computer and network issues in his home.

As our income grew we grew our budget and a much lower rate. We also bought our last home is 1990 at resisted the temptation to upgrade, even as our income tripled from the time of the home purchase, and we could easily afford bigger or more extravagant dwellings.

I watched my weight so that my clothes lasted longer and wore out, instead of outgrowing them and having to buy a new wardrobe due to size. Also, coming from a large family my siblings and I "passed down" our kids clothes among ourselves. At particular ages kids outgrow their clothes so fast that the clothes are still in good shape. We did a lot of clothes trading among our kids and their cousins.

Now in my retirement we are still probably LBYM, but not to the same extent since we are not in accumulation phase. We are currently spending cash well below our planned spending rate, so we have increased our expenditures somewhat. We'll see how we end up at year end, but it is likely we will increase our spending even further if the current trend continues.

 

[tb001]

I almost started a thread last week on a somewhat related topic—being penny wise and pound foolish, when I realized that I was reusing a makeup wipe that probably cost around a penny.

I am very cheap on some things. Most basic consumables either get reused or we find an alternative. E.g. the makeup wipes since I usually just use a small part of them, cloth napkins instead of paper. That sort of thing. DH has decided he likes using wooden coffee stirrers for our morning coffee and it’s driving me nuts—just get a spoon!! If it’s something we consume regularly, I make an effort to find the cheapest solution. I know it’s pennies, but it just feels wasteful. I also stretch out hair appts and do gel pedicures because they last forever. Most of my and our kids clothes are purchased used. Almost all furniture/household stuff comes from craigslist. I diy home repairs as much as possible. Cook at home or take advantage of happy hour specials/coupons when we eat out. Garden provides most herbs and summer veggies. Most meals cooked at home and from scratch.

But we spend on goods and services that dwarf all of the frugality. Regular house cleaners and lawn care, upgraded flights, good tools and cookware, hobbies, etc...

So I’m not sure that it’s really about LBYM. For me it’s as much about what we value and not being wasteful. I enjoy most diy projects and would gladly take them on even if the dollars didn’t make so much sense. Cooking healthy meals from scratch for our family is something I value. Buying used just makes sense if the product is in decent shape. I don’t enjoy spending my free time doing routine cleaning or yard work, so we hire that out. But when the landscape beds need redone, I’m ridiculously happy with my hands in the dirt.

 

[targatom2019]

can you say you LBYM if you have a 180K sport car and 150K fishing boat with a little above average income ?

 

[DrRoy]

So many things!

1. Pay myself first. Max out the 401(k) contribution. Max out the spousal IRA contribution. On each pay day, I transfer all $ not anticipated to be needed for the next two weeks to savings.
2. Pay CC in full every month.
3. .
4. Company pays for my cell phone.
5. DIY Fido investor (low fees).
6. .
7. Cheap lunch.
8. Cut the grass myself.
9. .
10. .
11. Do many plumbing, electrical, and home repairs (except appliance repair).
12. Only have Starbucks when at airports.
13. Fly coach (ugh).
14. Keep cars for 8-10 years +. Don't buy luxury brand cars.
15. .
16. Clean our own house.
17. Wash and wax our car.
18. Eat out only a few times a month.
19. .
20. Never buy anything on credit, unless it's a 0 interest loan (pay off credit cards in full every month).
21. .
22. Buy gas at COSTCO.
23. Hem some of my own clothes.
24. Minimize alcohol purchases when eating out.
25. Shop Nordstrom Rack, rather than retail.
26. Never gamble.
27. Don't smoke.
28. Only upgrade phones every 4 years or so.
29. Keep computers up to 9 years.

All of that said, it doesn't sound like we have much fun, but it's not true! We travel a bunch, take photos, and enjoy watching movies! Now RE, our travel budget is up 3X!

I revised Bill's list.

 

[The Cosmic Avenger]

can you say you LBYM if you have a 180K sport car and 150K fishing boat with a little above average income ?

Sure!

I'm very interested in where this thread has gone, so I didn't say anything sooner, but my driving motivation for starting it was the little things I do to save a few cents here or there that contribute to my FI and enable us to spend what we want on other things! I certainly could afford to get my hair cut every week or two, but it's also more convenient to do it myself, and not have to leave the house or worry when the barber is open.

 

[ckelly78z]

"Saving a few cents here and there" is what LBYM is all about in my opinion. It is the everyday habits of being frugal like packing your lunch, rather than getting takeout, using coupons regularly, or even carpooling/combining trips to save gas.