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I need to stop counting the days until ER
Old 06-06-2018, 08:17 PM   #1
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I need to stop counting the days until ER

because it may not happen. Suggestions for how to get thru bad days at w*rk instead?

I thought I was less than 5 years out but that may not be the case. Meanwhile, my job REALLY sucks in fact am getting a new one in a reorg that will suck likely be 10 times worse.

Checking off that little box is all that has been getting me by lately. (1759 calendar days to go).
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Old 06-06-2018, 09:14 PM   #2
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You're still 50% ahead of my target date. Other than that, I see you have two options:

1. Find another job
2. Do the best you can and ignore the rest aka grow a thicker skin at work...whatever happens happens, shrug it off and keep going
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Old 06-06-2018, 09:29 PM   #3
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I'm afraid I was not very clear, as usual. The new job is far less stable and much more technically difficult and so on but my fear is that I don't make the magic date to qualify for retiree health in which case I will be working much longer than planned (10-15 years instead of 5). (ACA in my county has only 1 poor option so even if free I would likely not take it - or not take it that long - kind of hard to determine the future). The possibility of leaving THAT MUCH later than planned pretty much wrecks some other dreams so its hard to adjust to both things at once.

I suppose that doesn't negate your point that I should just deal with it. . .
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Old 06-06-2018, 11:58 PM   #4
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For me it is about compartmentalizing. W*rk to me is doing a j*b that I have the skills to do and that I have the training to do. If part of that j*b is pressure to be faster or better, I generally try to shrug it off. I can do what I am trained and capable of doing, the rest I push back. Either they need to train be more or get me more help. Push back on overtime and taking w*rk home with you. I was lucky enough early in my career to learn that the more you take on, the more they give you. They do not go "wow, what a wonderful w*orker" "They go "Wow, he sure loves to w*rk alot, give him more" Do your job, and when you walk out the door in the evening, go work out or go for a run, or bike, or whatever is stress relief for you. Do not think about it until you walk back into those doors in the morning. They pay you for those hours only, don't think about it when they aren't paying you.
Hope that helps.
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Old 06-07-2018, 02:56 AM   #5
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Does your company have any provisions for "Leaves of Absence"?

I took one year off (unpaid, no benefits, but job available upon my return) to care for my mother, who lives alone, who was having major back surgery. This was right after the w*rk department decided to "reorganize".

Oh, and by the way, after the year went by I ended up resigning!

The difference for me, that allowed me to do this, was when I actually decided to stop assuming $0 Social Security income in our retirement plan, and start using something more realistic (ie current accrued SS benefit discounted by 1/3)

This changed me from ~5 years out until FIRE, into "Ready Now".

I have never looked back nor regretted this decision that I took about 6 years ago.

FWIW I was about age 47 at the time.

-gauss
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Old 06-07-2018, 04:57 AM   #6
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Meanwhile, my job REALLY sucks in fact am getting a new one in a reorg that will suck likely be 10 times worse.
Find a new employer.
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Old 06-07-2018, 05:58 AM   #7
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No LOA and this job will NOT have much training most likely. Start up unit I should just magically know despite no prior experience or education. /Sigh. Can't leave it at work if on call (24/7). Yes, I may have to find new employment but it costs me retiree health and (further) pension accrual. It is harder right now to adjust to the idea of NOT retiring early than it is to adjust to the idea of the w*rk.
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Old 06-07-2018, 06:20 AM   #8
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How old are you? Retire HI is a big carrot but 5 years from now no one knows what HI will look like, or if your employer won't slash these benefits at their whim.

I would not let something that may or may not happen in years run your life.

If you care to share some general numbers you might get more input.
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Old 06-07-2018, 06:49 AM   #9
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Originally Posted by badatmath View Post
I'm afraid I was not very clear, as usual. The new job is far less stable and much more technically difficult and so on but my fear is that I don't make the magic date to qualify for retiree health in which case I will be working much longer than planned (10-15 years instead of 5). (ACA in my county has only 1 poor option so even if free I would likely not take it - or not take it that long - kind of hard to determine the future). The possibility of leaving THAT MUCH later than planned pretty much wrecks some other dreams so its hard to adjust to both things at once.

I suppose that doesn't negate your point that I should just deal with it. . .
Maybe a short move across state lines will improve your healthcare choices and make retirement seem feasible again!! Or maybe just a different county. A short move is a small price to pay for a good healthcare plan and retirement.
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Old 06-07-2018, 08:57 AM   #10
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On those days, I tend to enjoy some Crown Royal or a nice Zinfandel while in my porch rocker; it helps. However, I'm working to check out in 2-3 years, so I'm thinking I will ride out the bad days where I am. Some days are crushing though...
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Old 06-07-2018, 02:13 PM   #11
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With a reorg, and a subsequent 5-year period, you might be waiting for the carrot (health insurance) that is yanked back at the last minute, and it sounds like there's no guarantee that your job will still be there by then. Since you're in AK, it would seem harder to find alternative health insurance, due to physical isolation and lack of choices. I'd consider finding a new job, and/or moving. Best of luck! 5 years is an eternity if you're locked into doing something you don't want to do, or being some place you don't want to be. Best wishes!
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Old 06-07-2018, 03:52 PM   #12
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Originally Posted by badatmath View Post
Checking off that little box is all that has been getting me by lately. (1759 calendar days to go).
Checking off the days from 1759 would definitely drive me nuts. I didnít actually count the days until the last week or two.
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Old 06-07-2018, 03:58 PM   #13
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For me it is about compartmentalizing. W*rk to me is doing a j*b that I have the skills to do and that I have the training to do. If part of that j*b is pressure to be faster or better, I generally try to shrug it off. I can do what I am trained and capable of doing, the rest I push back. Either they need to train be more or get me more help. Push back on overtime and taking w*rk home with you. I was lucky enough early in my career to learn that the more you take on, the more they give you. They do not go "wow, what a wonderful w*orker" "They go "Wow, he sure loves to w*rk alot, give him more" Do your job, and when you walk out the door in the evening, go work out or go for a run, or bike, or whatever is stress relief for you. Do not think about it until you walk back into those doors in the morning. They pay you for those hours only, don't think about it when they aren't paying you.
Hope that helps.

That is some really great/awesome perspective and advice. I need to take it.
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Old 06-07-2018, 04:03 PM   #14
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BTW, I'm down to 71 days (per my iPhone countdown app). Even THAT seems totally impossible at this point and may just kill me. (Don't ask - job is completely unreasonable in every way describable and the stress is totally unmanageable in a way that's majorly impacting my health).

Problem is, I have some serious golden handcuffs pulling in the opposite / OMY direction. Hard to walk away from that many and very significant $$ but weighing the "I might just die from the stress" vs pulling a few more big handfuls of gold coins out of the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.

Good times. Hope I can make it to mid Aug at which point the next big chunk of RSUs vest.
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Old 06-07-2018, 04:23 PM   #15
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Checking off the days from 1759 would definitely drive me nuts. I didn’t actually count the days until the last week or two.

I started at 2306. Yep, really. It used to be a good job too . . .



Yep, they could still yank the health ins but have not yet yanked pension accrual (but we think they will) . . .
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Old 06-07-2018, 04:28 PM   #16
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I wouldn't be able to mentally do a good job at what ever I was doing if the count down started with that many days. My exit day would come a lot sooner if that was the case and I would like to see if you can actually make that count down to that day. LOL

Good Luck
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Old 06-07-2018, 04:35 PM   #17
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I didnít start counting down until my FA, DW and I all agreed after a post Thanksgiving meeting that we could make it.
I gave notice the first work day of the new year and started counting workdays. I also took three weeks vacation before my last day.
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Old 06-07-2018, 07:47 PM   #18
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OP - A few ideas you could try:
1) Find a fellow employee there that enjoys the job and walk in their shoes.
2) Find an X Cell Mate that truly regrets quitting and learn from their hardship.
3) Work really hard, expand your current skill set and get promoted out of the current layer of mess.
4) Look at jobs that pay almost nothing but have great benefits (a school / college). Smile, quit and walk into the land of minimum wage.

PS - Idea #1 works for me.
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Old 06-07-2018, 08:23 PM   #19
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Smaller bytes of time. Perhaps you could count down the time to lunch or dinner. Or maybe count down the hours. Shorter goals = high success rate.
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Old 06-08-2018, 03:53 AM   #20
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At megacorp, I recall my countdown timer being 2,190 days. It gave me a target I could work towards. At least that's how I thought of it. The number of days seemed too great, so I made a timer in Excel, and it counted down, but also stated years (6), months (72), weeks (312), and days. Months or weeks worked better, showing how time was indeed moving at a noticeable pace. Days was just not a positive indicator, given how many there were.

Eventually I was laid off twice, for 6-month periods. They were glorious times, IMO. The second layoff became permanent. I received very little when kicked to the curb.

Call me lucky, but 3-4 years before termination, I took advantage of tuition reimbursement, before it was cut significantly. I earned a Masters, and it cost me nothing but time. I was able to focus on the degree for 2-3 years. It helped to divert my attention from the crap at work. In my case, there has been financial compensation later, in a much higher wage at minicorp.

As several have suggested, there are other things more important to you, like your health. So it is good that you've posted, seeking ideas.
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