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02-12-2019, 08:52 AM
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#4661
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 12,880
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Veni, Vidi, Velcro: I came, I saw, I stuck around.
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Al
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02-12-2019, 08:53 AM
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#4662
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 12,880
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I always wanted to be somebody. I guess I should have been more specific.
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Al
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02-12-2019, 10:28 PM
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#4663
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Mar 2003
Posts: 18,085
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You've got to hand it to a blind prostitute...
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"All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others."
- George Orwell
Ezekiel 23:20
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02-12-2019, 10:40 PM
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#4664
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Independence
Posts: 7,297
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blind man walked into a bar. and a table. and a chair.
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"Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible." Dalai Lama
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02-12-2019, 10:41 PM
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#4665
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 35,712
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An irony: duct tape should not be used on ducts, though it is useful for other purposes.
You don't believe this? See: https://servicechampions.com/why-duc...eal-air-ducts/
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"Old age is the most unexpected of all things that happen to a man" -- Leon Trotsky (1879-1940)
"Those Who Can Make You Believe Absurdities Can Make You Commit Atrocities" - Voltaire (1694-1778)
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02-13-2019, 07:42 AM
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#4666
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 12,880
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 Quote:
Originally Posted by NW-Bound
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Wow. Plus, it was originally called duck tape!
__________________
Al
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02-13-2019, 05:32 PM
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#4667
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Mar 2003
Posts: 18,085
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Did you know the chicken is the only species of animal that eats with its pecker?
__________________
"All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others."
- George Orwell
Ezekiel 23:20
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02-19-2019, 07:02 AM
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#4668
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Texas
Posts: 10,930
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Ronald Reagan telling jokes about the Soviet's, back in the day. I heard the first one on FOX news yesterday.. Pretty funny.
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02-20-2019, 07:43 AM
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#4669
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Texas: No Country for Old Men
Posts: 50,021
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...
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Numbers is hard
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02-20-2019, 08:06 AM
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#4670
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Aug 2017
Location: Champaign
Posts: 4,722
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Two turtles went into a bar and ordered whiskey. One turtle asked the bartender if whiskey would make him faster. The bartender said "no, but it will make you come out of your shell."
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"Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail."
Ralph Waldo Emerson
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02-24-2019, 12:24 PM
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#4671
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 12,880
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__________________
Al
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02-24-2019, 12:27 PM
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#4672
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 12,880
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__________________
Al
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03-01-2019, 04:46 PM
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#4673
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Dryer sheet wannabe
Join Date: May 2017
Posts: 11
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03-02-2019, 08:32 PM
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#4674
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Mar 2003
Posts: 18,085
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.
__________________
"All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others."
- George Orwell
Ezekiel 23:20
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03-02-2019, 08:40 PM
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#4675
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Mar 2003
Posts: 18,085
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TromboneAl
My wife went to self-help group for compulsive talkers. It's called "On an' On Anon."
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Along the same lines...
__________________
"All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others."
- George Orwell
Ezekiel 23:20
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03-02-2019, 09:22 PM
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#4676
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Full time employment: Posting here.
Join Date: Jun 2018
Location: Brisbane
Posts: 855
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some how i can laugh at this still
the house where i am supposed to be 'couch-surfing is under repair from water damage to the roof , in 2016 partly caused by faulty repairs made in 2014
so far after 3 years since the pivotal rain event rooms complete ( fit to move the furniture back into ) equals ZERO , the house has been rewired 3 times completely , the tile flooring replaced TWiCE ( the entire house has ceramic floors ) the bathroom is being torn up for the 4th time in an attempt to make it waterproof , most of the internal walls have been replaced ( at least once ), all the ceilings has been replaced ( some of that 3 times ) the kitchen bench-top is on version 4 ( one arrived broken , one arrived the wrong size , and one broken during the ceiling repair ....
the loo won't be installed until AFTER the painters and other workers are finished ( the plumber is trying to avoid a disaster there .. and who could blame him )
things to do finish the shower ( hopefully before 2030 ) paint 100% of the walls ( AGAIN ) and most of the ceiling check for new broken floor tiles , install the kitchen , shower and toilet plumbing ... put the lock on the back door and toilet door , clean and vacuum the house and move in the furniture ( which gas been sitting in shipping containers for about 3 years
sigh , bound to be something we have missed , the good thing is it is only a single storey house with no stairs ( it could have been worse ... but it DOES have a tile roof , [ wink ] )
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i hold the Australian listed versions of AU ( Anglo Ashanti ) , BHP , and JHG .
You must learn from the mistakes of others. You can't possibly live long enough to make them all yourself.
Samuel Levenson
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03-04-2019, 06:26 PM
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#4677
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Independence
Posts: 7,297
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__________________
"Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible." Dalai Lama
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03-05-2019, 09:51 AM
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#4678
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Cville
Posts: 1,602
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A SIGN IN A SHOE REPAIR STORE IN VANCOUVER READs: We will heel you
We will save your sole
We will even dye for you.
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FIRE 31 Aug, 2018 - Always leave every place better than you found it, always give more than expected or Due
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03-05-2019, 09:52 AM
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#4679
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Cville
Posts: 1,602
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A SIGN ON A BLINDS AND CURTAIN TRUCK:
“Blind man driving.”
__________________
FIRE 31 Aug, 2018 - Always leave every place better than you found it, always give more than expected or Due
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03-05-2019, 09:52 AM
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#4680
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Cville
Posts: 1,602
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Sign over a Gynecologist's Office:
"Dr. Jones, at your cervix.”
In a Podiatrist's office:
"Time wounds all heels.”
__________________
FIRE 31 Aug, 2018 - Always leave every place better than you found it, always give more than expected or Due
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