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Old 06-07-2019, 12:16 PM   #4741
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Thanks, I always wondered where almond milk came from. Now I can sleep better knowing this!
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Old 06-07-2019, 01:27 PM   #4742
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The above Youtube video had this comment posted:

Quote:
It's called "almond milk" because no one will drink "nut juice".
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Old 06-15-2019, 09:07 AM   #4743
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This video is crude and disgusting and it's childish bathroom humor. But I have to confess that when I watched it I laughed harder than I have in years.

Watch at your own discretion.

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Old 06-15-2019, 02:02 PM   #4744
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This video is crude and disgusting and it's childish bathroom humor. But I have to confess that when I watched it I laughed harder than I have in years.

Watch at your own discretion.

Seen this before, hilarious!
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Old 06-16-2019, 01:38 PM   #4745
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Why don't you hear anything when a pterodactyl goes to the bathroom?

Because the P is silent
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Old 06-24-2019, 12:41 PM   #4746
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Old 06-24-2019, 01:42 PM   #4747
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The above video is indeed too crude.

I like something less graphic, like the following.

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Old 06-25-2019, 08:49 PM   #4748
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Old 06-27-2019, 06:21 AM   #4749
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The cable repairman was on my street and as I walked by he asked me what time it was.

I told him it was between 8 am and 1 pm.
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Old 06-27-2019, 06:45 AM   #4750
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The cable repairman was on my street and as I walked by he asked me what time it was.

I told him it was between 8 am and 1 pm.
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Old 06-27-2019, 07:48 AM   #4751
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Maybe this isn't a joke.
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Old 06-27-2019, 07:52 AM   #4752
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Cute one scrapped from web


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Old 06-27-2019, 07:58 AM   #4753
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^ "Fido's not here." (Apologies to Cheech & Chong.)
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Old 07-03-2019, 11:50 AM   #4754
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Old 07-03-2019, 04:11 PM   #4755
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"""My wife asked why I was whispering. I said I'm afraid the government is listening. She laughed. I laughed. Alexa and Siri laughed"""
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Old 07-03-2019, 04:15 PM   #4756
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Two fonts walk into a bar and sit down to order drinks. They wait for the bartender to come over, but he doesn't. They wait, and wait some more. Finally, one font shouts over at him, "Hey, can we order some drinks here?", and the bartender says, "Sorry, but we don't serve your type here."
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Old 07-03-2019, 05:46 PM   #4757
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Where did Captain Hook get his hook?

From a second hand shop.
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Old 07-03-2019, 06:01 PM   #4758
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The following are no jokes.


Rhotacism (speech impediment): the inability or difficulty in pronouncing the sound r.

In 2002, a tree was planted in a park in Los Angeles in memory of Beatles guitarist George Harrison. The tree later died after being infested by beetles.

Emerson Mose, the CEO of Crayola, retired after 35 years working there. He revealed that he was color blind.

The winners of an elementary school spelling bee competition in Utah received trophies with the inscription "Viewmont Spellling Bee".
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Old 07-10-2019, 04:38 PM   #4759
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Signs at the eye doctor:
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Old 07-11-2019, 11:20 PM   #4760
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Lenny had this phobia. Every night, he was afraid there was someone hiding under his bed.

The psychiatrist told him it would be cured if Lenny went to see him every week for a year. Each visit cost $200. Lenny said he would think about it.

Some time later, Lenny ran across the shrink, who asked why he had not come back. Lenny said his bartender fixed his fear for free.

The shrink asked "How?"

Lenny said "He told me to cut the legs off the bed".
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