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Old 06-20-2009, 01:38 AM   #1921
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Uhm, not sure this is a joke... 9GAG - Life Is Long
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Old 06-20-2009, 02:01 PM   #1922
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Uhm, not sure this is a joke... 9GAG - Life Is Long
An anonymous comment from that same page caught my eye...

A wise man once told me: "There are two ways to live your life. You can live as though you will live forever or you can live as though you will die tomorrow. The key is to realize that they are the same"

Good stuff...no joke.
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Old 06-20-2009, 06:13 PM   #1923
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"There are two ways to live your life. You can live as though you will live forever or you can live as though you will die tomorrow. The key is to realize that they are the same"
I'm not following here. If I'm going to die tomorrow, I'll fly to France in a private jet and have one of them $2,000 meals at the fancy restaurant, with 20 Twinkies for dessert. If I'm going to live forever, I won't do that.

How should those two be the same?
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Old 06-20-2009, 06:28 PM   #1924
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I'm not following here. If I'm going to die tomorrow, I'll fly to France in a private jet and have one of them $2,000 meals at the fancy restaurant, with 20 Twinkies for dessert. If I'm going to live forever, I won't do that.

How should those two be the same?
Whew, I don't get it either - thought maybe I was the only one
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Old 06-20-2009, 09:05 PM   #1925
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Originally Posted by freebird5825 View Post
An anonymous comment from that same page caught my eye...

A wise man once told me: "There are two ways to live your life. You can live as though you will live forever or you can live as though you will die tomorrow. The key is to realize that they are the same"
Quote:
Originally Posted by TromboneAl View Post
h 20 Twinkies for dessert. If I'm going to live forever, I won't do that.

How should those two be the same?
the 20 Twinkies distracted me for a minute...

My interpretation was to be optimistic (you will live forever) about the future and to live each day to the fullest
as if it were your last (you will die tomorrow).
It is possible to do both (the same).
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Old 06-20-2009, 09:59 PM   #1926
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You might know if today is your last day (if you're on death row, or you have a terminal illness, for example, and maybe you buy that ticket to Paris--that's what Oliver wanted to do in Love Story for Jenny, right? ). But no one knows for sure that today isn't one's last day. One day it will be my last day, whether I know it or not, so I like the idea of living as if there is no tomorrow.
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Old 06-21-2009, 04:51 AM   #1927
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Last time I checked this thread the title was something like "funny Thursday joke" or something along those lines.....
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Old 06-21-2009, 11:18 AM   #1928
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Last time I checked this thread the title was something like "funny Thursday joke" or something along those lines.....
We're easily distracted....
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Old 06-21-2009, 01:22 PM   #1929
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We're easily distracted....
speaking of easily distracted, there's something different about your avatar now....
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Old 06-21-2009, 01:41 PM   #1930
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speaking of easily distracted, there's something different about your avatar now....
Beat you to it. I noticed it first and let her know it
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Old 06-21-2009, 02:52 PM   #1931
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Just doing my part to try and keep the members up in these down daze....
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Old 06-21-2009, 03:23 PM   #1932
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Just doing my part to try and keep the members up in these down daze....
not going there, nope, not a gonna do it.
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Old 06-22-2009, 08:32 AM   #1933
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not going there, nope, not a gonna do it.
Wouldn't be prudent.
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Old 06-22-2009, 08:26 PM   #1934
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have you ever been guilty of looking at others your own age and thinking, surely i can't look that old. Well . . . You'll love this one.


My name is Alice, and I was sitting in the waiting room for my first appointment with a new dentist. I noticed his dds diploma on the wall, which bore his full name. Suddenly, I remembered a tall, handsome, dark-haired boy with the same name had been in my high school class some 30-odd years ago. Could he be the same guy that I had a secret crush on, way back then? Upon seeing him, however, I quickly discarded any such thought. This balding, gray-haired man with the deeply lined face was way too old to have been my classmate.

After he examined my teeth, I asked him if he had attended Morgan Park High School.

'Yes. Yes, I did. I'm a Mustang,' he gleamed with pride. When did you graduate?' I asked. He answered, 'in 1975. Why do you ask?'
You were in my class!', I exclaimed.

He looked at me closely. Then, that ugly, old, bald, wrinkled faced, fat-@ssed, gray-haired, decrepit son-of-a-%#&$# asked, 'what did you teach?
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Old 06-23-2009, 06:45 AM   #1935
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Not a very good one but...here it goes:

Three workers were on a scaffold cleaning the windows of a highrise. Then one of them says that he has to go to the bathroom. While he is in there an earthquake strikes, collapses the scaffolding and the two workers fall to their death.

The next day, the surviving worker and his wife are cinsoling the widows at the funeral, when two men in black suits and ties approach the widows and one of them says in a mournful voice: " We are from the insurance company and want to express our condolences for such a tragic loss, and even though we know itīs no consolation, we want to give each of you the cheques to the amount of 1,5 million dollars as specified in the insurance policy suscribed by your late husbandsīs company regarding this kind of industrial fatalities.

The wife of the survivng worker, astonished on hearing this statement, turns to her husband -not recovered yet from the accident and the death of his colleagues- and in an icy tone says: "Right, I see, ....AND YOU, YOU LAZY BUM, ....TAKING A C**P!!
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Old 06-23-2009, 11:07 AM   #1936
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"Because a person's not garbage because they make less cash - it's your self-exultation that belongs in the trash".

Illegal to be

Was thinking this morning before getting up how like a teeming mass of insects we are - tiny differences that in the large view matter to very very few. So then i stumbled onto this strip....
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Old 06-23-2009, 06:30 PM   #1937
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We're easily distracted....
Look, Twinkies...
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Old 06-23-2009, 06:31 PM   #1938
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Three men approached the gate to heaven and as
there was only one opening left, the gatekeeper said
that whoever had the most remarkable and worthy death could enter.
He asked the first man how he died, and the man replied,

'Imagine this -- I suspected my wife was having an affair
behind my back and I wanted to find out the truth.
I came home from work one day to surprise her and catch her in the act.
When I searched the house I found her in the bathroom.
The mirror was fogged and she had a towel on but her hair
wasn't wet, so I knew she wasn't taking a shower.
I looked all around the house to find the guy.
I found ten fingers hanging onto the window sill outside.
I pounded them until he finally let go.
When he fell he landed in some bushes and
God must have loved him because he lived, so I threw the
refrigerator out the window to finish him off.
After all the excitement I fell dead of a heart attack.'

Then the gatekeeper asked the second man how he died. He replied,

'Imagine this -- I'm minding my own business on top of my
apartment building. I was riding one of those stationary
bicycles when the screws gave out and I flew off the side.
I reached out and caught a window sill, then some idiot
started pounding on my fingertips. When I fell I landed
in some bushes and God must have loved me because I lived.
But then that same idiot threw his
refrigerator out the window and it crushed me.'

'That, too, is horrible,' said the gate keeper.
Then he asked the third man the same question.

His reply was, 'OK, imagine this, I'm naked in a refrigerator...'
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Old 06-23-2009, 06:34 PM   #1939
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"Dear God, this year please send clothes for all those poor ladies in Daddy's computer, Amen."
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Old 06-23-2009, 06:35 PM   #1940
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Little Susie goes home from school and tells her mum that the boys keep asking her to do cartwheels because she's very good at them ?

Mum said : " YOU should say NO - they only want to look at your undies"..

Susie said: " I know they do, that's why I hide them in my backpack"!!
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