 |
|
06-17-2009, 06:28 AM
|
#21
|
|
Gone but not forgotten
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Sarasota,fl.
Posts: 11,447
|
 Quote:
Originally Posted by DMGO
Everyone only gets one mother...
|
Absolutely ! Sorry for your troubles !
|
|
|
 |
Join the #1 Early Retirement and Financial Independence Forum Today - It's Totally Free!
Are you planning to be financially independent as early as possible so you can live life on your own terms? Discuss successful investing strategies, asset allocation models, tax strategies and other related topics in our online forum community. Our members range from young folks just starting their journey to financial independence, military retirees and even multimillionaires. No matter where you fit in you'll find that Early-Retirement.org is a great community to join. Best of all it's totally FREE!
You are currently viewing our boards as a guest so you have limited access to our community. Please take the time to register and you will gain a lot of great new features including; the ability to participate in discussions, network with our members, see fewer ads, upload photographs, create a retirement blog, send private messages and so much, much more!
|
|
06-17-2009, 07:52 AM
|
#22
|
|
Administrator
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Chicagoland
Posts: 40,726
|
Hi DMGO
My wife and I have done volunteer work in Hospice - my wife a considerable amount over more than a decade. There is no doubt it is one of the better aspects of US medical care - and one where "care and compassion' stand out. The professional caregivers in this field are exceptional and their experience invaluable.
Do you live with your mother or close by?
|
|
|
|
|
06-17-2009, 08:04 AM
|
#23
|
|
Full time employment: Posting here.
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: New York
Posts: 898
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by DMGO
Everyone only gets one mother...
|
A friend of mine put it this way - when you lose your mother its like the universe changes. You never get used to it. You adjust, but you never get used to it.
He was right - I lost mine last year. She was relatively young - in her 60s. Home hospice was great, they really kept her comfortable.
__________________
Money's just something you need in case you don't die tomorrow.
|
|
|
|
|
06-17-2009, 08:08 AM
|
#24
|
|
Moderator Emeritus
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: San Francisco
Posts: 8,827
|
I lost Mom and Dad about 10 years ago, within 8 months of each other coincidentally. It was a bad, bad year.
I felt like a 50 year old orphan.
__________________
Rich
San Francisco Area
ESR'd March 2010. FIRE'd January 2011.
As if you didn't know..If the above message contains medical content, it's NOT intended as advice, and may not be accurate, applicable or sufficient. Don't rely on it for any purpose. Consult your own doctor for all medical advice.
|
|
|
|
|
06-17-2009, 04:05 PM
|
#25
|
|
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Colorado, USA
Posts: 1,127
|
DMGO, you're in our thoughts at this difficult time. I'm happy though that your Mother is making her own decisions. Like so many other posters, our family's experiences with hospice have been excellent.
Coach
|
|
|
|
|
06-17-2009, 05:08 PM
|
#26
|
|
Dryer sheet aficionado
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 41
|
I appreciate all the kind words. My mother doesn't understand why she has this hospice nurse hanging around. She keeps saying that she'll eat in a few days, when she feels hungry. Her mind is starting to slip away. Her thinking isn't right. It's a really hard thing to see. She is actually talking about going on a trip to see some family members she hasn't seen in a long time. She doesn't think of herself as old, or even sick.
__________________
Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
|
|
|
|
|
06-17-2009, 05:26 PM
|
#27
|
|
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Collin County, TX
Posts: 9,296
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by DMGO
I appreciate all the kind words. My mother doesn't understand why she has this hospice nurse hanging around. She keeps saying that she'll eat in a few days, when she feels hungry. Her mind is starting to slip away. Her thinking isn't right. It's a really hard thing to see. She is actually talking about going on a trip to see some family members she hasn't seen in a long time. She doesn't think of herself as old, or even sick.
|
We went through a similar situation like this with my FIL. We would smile and say things like, "That sounds good, but for now let's rest a while." We said whatever we could to keep him content.
I know....it's hard.
__________________
There's no need to complicate, our time is short..
|
|
|
|
|
06-17-2009, 09:03 PM
|
#28
|
|
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: May 2008
Location: No fixed abode
Posts: 8,765
|
Both my FIL and MIL died in the past few years, one in a nursing home/hospice situation, the other at home with hospice. I heartily recommend home. And as everyone has said, they are saints.
My only advice is to just be there as much as possible. Personally I think her decision to not undergo tests and procedures is a good one. Both in-laws had a number of things done to them, none of which helped, and which only made them more miserable than they needed to be.
You and your mom will be in my prayers. Take care.
__________________
"Good judgment comes from experience. Experience comes from bad judgement." - Anonymous (not Will Rogers or Sam Clemens)
DW and I - FIREd at 50 (7/06), living off assets
|
|
|
|
|
06-17-2009, 09:19 PM
|
#29
|
|
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 2,203
|
my thoughts are with you in this difficult time. stay strong for her sake
|
|
|
|
|
06-24-2009, 02:10 PM
|
#30
|
|
Dryer sheet aficionado
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 41
|
Well, Mom passed away today, at around 12 noon. I got the call while I was going home from work, and was going to stop at her place to just sit and talk. The nurse said she was having real bad pain that started late last night, so at least she didn't have to suffer for too long. I went to see her anyway. The police had finished up by the time I got there, and I saw my sister, and the hospice chaplain. I got to sit by my mother one last time, and told her that I love her, and hope that she's at peace now. I want to thank you all for the kind words. Burial is being planned for Friday.
__________________
Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
|
|
|
|
|
06-24-2009, 02:13 PM
|
#31
|
|
Full time employment: Posting here.
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: SoCal
Posts: 928
|
So sorry for your loss, DMGO. I hope the good folks at the hospice were able to make her last hours as comfortable as possible.
__________________
I can't complain, but sometimes I still do.
- Joe Walsh
|
|
|
|
|
06-24-2009, 02:15 PM
|
#32
|
|
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 5,350
|
Sorry for your loss.
Why would the police need to be there?
|
|
|
|
|
06-24-2009, 02:23 PM
|
#33
|
|
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Central MS/Orange Beach, AL
Posts: 9,072
|
So sorry for your loss. Glad she didn't have to suffer long.
__________________
Retired 3/31/2007@52
Investing style: Full time wuss.
|
|
|
|
|
06-24-2009, 02:31 PM
|
#34
|
|
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 1,116
|
Sad to hear of your Mom passing away. But, why did the poor soul have to suffer in pain at all? Aren´t there enough painkillers and such to prevent it?
__________________
I get by with a little help from my friends....ta ta ta ta ta...
|
|
|
|
|
06-24-2009, 02:42 PM
|
#35
|
|
Moderator Emeritus
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 17,774
|
Bless her and you. So sorry.
__________________
“Would you like an adventure now, or would you like to have your tea first?” J.M. Barrie, Peter Pan
|
|
|
|
|
06-24-2009, 02:47 PM
|
#36
|
|
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: East Nowhere, 43N Latitude, NY
Posts: 9,037
|
Losing your mom is one of the toughest things to go through. Your sentence about going to her side was truly beautiful.
I wish you strength and peace.
__________________
"All our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them." - Walt Disney
|
|
|
|
|
06-24-2009, 03:44 PM
|
#37
|
|
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Collin County, TX
Posts: 9,296
|
I hope your heart will be full of sweet memories.
__________________
There's no need to complicate, our time is short..
|
|
|
|
|
06-24-2009, 04:32 PM
|
#38
|
|
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: May 2008
Location: No fixed abode
Posts: 8,765
|
My condolences to you and your family. I agree with Vincente about the pain issue, and hope she didn't suffer much. Take care.
__________________
"Good judgment comes from experience. Experience comes from bad judgement." - Anonymous (not Will Rogers or Sam Clemens)
DW and I - FIREd at 50 (7/06), living off assets
|
|
|
|
|
06-24-2009, 04:36 PM
|
#39
|
|
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Feb 2006
Posts: 1,183
|
My thoughts are with you. May the sad memories slip away with time and the happy ones stay to comfort you in your loss.
|
|
|
|
|
06-24-2009, 04:48 PM
|
#40
|
|
Moderator Emeritus
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Northern Illinois
Posts: 16,603
|
My condolences, DMGO. My mom passed away under similar circumstances with home hospice care. I think its great that you had some private time with her after she passed.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
|
|
|
Posting Rules
|
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
HTML code is Off
|
|
|
|
» Recent Threads
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
» Quick Links
|
|
|
Linear Mode
