Photo or avatar on Net - Why should it matter?

[Amethyst]

Sometimes, posters complain about people who use avatars on the Internet, instead of the person's photo (though how one could tell it's their "actual" photo, is a mystery to me).

Can see why a fake photo or avatar would be wrong and unfair on a dating site, but can't understand why it would matter on ER forum, Facebook, etc.

Avatars (IMHO) say more about posters than a picture of their face does. All my face tells the world, is the things that don't matter: my age, sex, race, hair color, eye color, a guess as to my weight, the way my hair grows and the way I choose to have it cut. Possibly, the condition of my front teeth. Why would anyone (who isn't looking to date me) care about those things, when the real "me" is in my posts?

Thoughts?

Amethyst

 

[happy2bretired]

I'm perfectly happy showing my face...see my pert little ears and hairy face.

I'm too shy to show my face and I like to think I'm also too smart.

 

[RonBoyd]

It's what I see when looking in a mirror... certainly it's the way I feel.

 

[KM]

Interesting....when I see a picture of someone as their avatar - I immediately assume it is not them. Not sure why, I guess it is because every other site I am on, no one uses their own picture.

Now that I am posting more, I have considered putting an avatar out there, only because I think it helps people "recognize" you quicker. But it won't be a picture of me.

My kids say I am "old-fashioned", but I am not big fan of plastering my picture all over the internet. What if one of you is an axe-murderer or something You would know what I looked like. And if I made you mad, instead of using IGNORE, you could hunt me down and kill me!!

 

[LOL!]

I use photos, usernames, and avatars to mislead and misdirect. I've never seen a rule that says there are rules about these things, except of course unless you are trying to create a brand and market yourself.

 

[calmloki]

Think an avatar can represent one's reality in ways an actual photo cannot.

 

[winger]

Avatars are fine on an anonymous site such as this forum. I might add one someday...

Facebook is not an anonymous site. You use your real name, and for the most part you only communicate with former or present friends, co-workers and family. You can control who sees your information... although that isn't always as easy as it should be.

Can't speak fo everyone but I often get emails or notifications that say "Sherri (Jones) McBride wants to be your friend. Confirm?"

Looking at school, working life and now ER travel, I have met more than a few people. Sometimes, they have the same names! Or I never knew the last name, or the real name.

A picture would help. An avatar that shows me what you are about.. doesn't help.

And, if you can't take the time to post a picture, I'm not sure how serious you really are about all this. You invest a little time, and so will I.

 

[Bestwifeever]

I like my privacy (like anyone cares who I am, really!) and would not provide much identifying information publicly here or elsewhere. I don't know if young people feel the same way.

If I did Facebook, though, I would definitely use a (really really good ) current photo of myself (so my old boyfriends would be eating their hearts out)--don't people do Facebook mostly because they want to connect/reconnect with people?

I also think someone who is really smart could figure out who many people are by the fictitious info used combined with minor factual details/photos of locations, pets, etc. in their posts.

 

[Moemg]

I do not mind posting an occasional picture of myself but I would not have a picture avatar . We discuss too many financial facts . That I like to keep private . Now that bestwifeever mentioned facebook I'm going to have too look for a much better picture .

 

[Khan]

My pictures are here and elsewhere.
I like "Khan".
He's been my persona/avatar from way back.

 

[bbbamI]

I like avatars that show a member's face...kind of makes their posts more intimate and credible.

Now it better really be them, otherwise if they meet another forum member, the jig is up. I have one of my favorite pics of myself on my profile page...the lighting was low and the make-up was high.

 

[Amethyst]

Facebook is not an anonymous site. You use your real name, and for the most part you only communicate with former or present friends, co-workers and family. You can control who sees your information... although that isn't always as easy as it should be..

This is why I use weekly-changing avatars on Facebook. My facebook friends are close relatives, and people I've known for years. They know what I look like and don't care, so long as I have not grown an extra head (they would want to see a picture of that).

And, if you can't take the time to post a picture, I'm not sure how serious you really are about all this. You invest a little time, and so will I.

Umm...I don't understand this statement, although I parsed it several times. Care to elaborate? Serious about what? Time to do what? (I do hope this isn't one of those "If you don't know, I'm certainly not going to tell you" moments, with which I am so drearily familiar in life).

Amethyst



Amethyst

 

[haha]

I also think someone who is really smart could figure out who many people are by the fictitious info used combined with minor factual details/photos of locations, pets, etc. in their posts.

This is probably true. But posts with none except very abstract background are not particularly interesting. If I know the city where someone lives, I can visualize something of their reality. Without that what they say just drifts away into the ether.

Ha

 

[NW-Bound]

I have hinted several times that I look like Steve McQueen.

OK, enough BS'ing. I was reluctant to post pictures of even my houses and RV. What if one of my neighbors happens to frequent this forum? They would then know more about my financial situation, my w*rk, my life than even my siblings did.

And then, as I still do w*rk for pay, people I am in contact with might also know more about me than I want them to know.

By the way, do people even remember what McQueen looked like?

PS. I have no Facebook account, and am not interested. Being a loner through schools, I had only a few friends, and I still had contact with them. I remember little about other classmates, and would have little in common with them now. Hence, no need for Facebook.

 

[Amethyst]

By the way, do people even remember what McQueen looked like?

When I was a little girl, I had crushes on every handsome blond actor, especially the tall ones (though I made an exception for Paul Newman) and he was among the pack. I lost interest after he started looking rather weather-worn, though.

Amethyst

 

[NW-Bound]

McQueen's height is still a matter of debate.

Still, it does not matter. I just want to be as "cool". Weather-worn is OK. He died when at about my age now.

And I am not tall either. I am skinny, and that is the truth.

PS. And I have dark hair.

 

[Dawg52]

Trust me, my dog is much better looking than me.

 

[Amethyst]

Hmm. I'm not like that, so maybe we are all wired somewhat differently in that respect. I like your photos, yet I would like you just as well, if you did not post any photos of yourself. Do you remember, I thought (at first) that you might be a Black man with an Asian name!

This is probably true. But posts with none except very abstract background are not particularly interesting. If I know the city where someone lives, I can visualize something of their reality. Without that what they say just drifts away into the ether.

Ha

 

[bbbamI]

McQueen's height is still a matter of debate.

DH met Steve McQueen in 1975. He says Steve was about 5' 7"...and that's stretching it a bit.

 

[NW-Bound]

He was still called "the King of Cool"!

And I still want to be as cool! And I still do not look like him.

 

[kcowan]

When I started, I just used my picture. I thought it would not hurt. I also have a profile that shows much of what you need to know about me. In 15 years, I have had no problems with ID theft or spamming et al.

On financial sites, I replaced my photo with my double-dip graph. Some people reacted negatively. I have left the double-dip until I am proven right without a doubt (or not).

So I think a personal avatar offers little downside and potential upside because people feel that they know you better. I met with meadbh once and she could recognize me so I guess it is a reasonable likeness.

But I am OK with anyone that does not have a picture. To each his own.

 

[CuppaJoe]

Most of my avatars here have been my own photos of things that interest me. The current one (my photo from a book) is a detail from “Restaurant de la Sirene at Asnieres,” a Van Gogh that is coming soon to an art museum near me. Reminds me of my high school which had a drab exterior design from the late ‘50s punctuated with orange doors; there was a column in the H.S. newspaper, “behind the orange doors.” Some of you may relate to why I would associate that with a forum.

Other forums I frequent have many many bad photos of forum members, probably taken by their own webcams; they sometimes crop the views to make them less recognizable. I cannot relate to that. I recently changed my avatar at one site to a more funky image.

 

[W2R]

This being an early retirement forum, a lot of our members are still working and haven't announced their early retirement plans and schedule to management. So, I can certainly understand why they wouldn't want to post a photo or other identifying information (though an RV? Gee, NW-Bound, there are lots of RV's in the world, and even in your area. )

There are other reasons to be cautious, especially for wealthy older people living alone who, I suppose, might be targeted by the unscrupulous for one reason or another. There are parts of some cities where it would not be judicious to walk around on Saturday night wearing a sandwich board saying "I am a millionaire and a little drifty and have nobody watching out for my best interests". Yet sometimes our members say such things here, knowing that nobody knows who they are anyway.

I like avatars, and have even saved and kept some of my favorites that people have used - - not that I would ever use the same one, but just because I like them (and my hard drive is over half empty anyway).

My present avatar is not me (and most people here know that). Occasionally I change it, but when I do I have received multiple PMs from various male forum members asking me to change it back. So, Eva remains.

 

[NW-Bound]

This being an early retirement forum, a lot of our members are still working and haven't announced their early retirement plans and schedule to management. So, I can certainly understand why they wouldn't want to post a photo or other identifying information (though an RV? Gee, NW-Bound, there are lots of RV's in the world, and even in your area. )

Maybe I am just paranoid, but better safe than sorry...

People I am in contact with for both 1099 and W2 works know that I am a part-timer and work as I please, and on individual assignment/project basis. But if they know that I actually like the w*rk, they would try to pay me less. And that's against my principle.

 

[bbbamI]

My present avatar is not me (and most people here know that). Occasionally I change it, but when I do I have received multiple PMs from various male forum members asking me to change it back. So, Eva remains.

Just gotta love those male members....