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Old 02-27-2008, 07:16 PM   #41
Sarah in SC's Avatar
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Charleston, SC
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Citrine, I was in a job like that. Horrible, life-sucking drama. Seriously, find a way out. Focus your energy on your plan.

Asheville is beautiful and there are some wonderful places to eat and hike! And lots of other artists! Life is too short for this stuff!

I had a boss tell me in a review once that I "ran down hallways looking for locked doors". Say what? Boy, was I glad to hear the bas!@%$ went bankrupt! I picked up cigarette smoking again at that job, after not smoking for seven years! Some workplaces are just evil.

I am so sorry you are going through this!

“One day your life will flash before your eyes. Make sure it's worth watching.”
Gerard Arthur Way

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Old 02-27-2008, 11:05 PM   #42
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Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Portland, Oregon
Posts: 6,036
Absolutely develop and work a plan to get away from this manager, but don't breathe a word to anyone. Start networking for another position. It isn't good form to slam your manager, it is ok to say you are looking for an opportunity to better utilize your skills. If your manager is a nut case others will know it and those who don't know wouldn't believe you - keep your chin up and smile. Work on getting out of there, to a place where your manager would not go.

As I have advised others planning to leave, keep all your personal things at home, or at least a copy at home. Don't remove confidential business records, just things that pertain to you and that illustrate your strengths.

Duck bjorn.
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Old 02-28-2008, 05:21 AM   #43
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Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: East Nowhere, 43N Latitude, NY
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Originally Posted by citrine View Post
I have tried that...letting go and walking away....I have been told that I am rude and not a team player. I have tried to be short and sweet in my conversations....tried to be accomodating and going above and thing sets her off and done. We usually have blow up a month....and I am getting sick of it. I am also getting nervous that now with the exec director gone, she will start acting as if she is the one.
I pray, say the serenity prayer, smoke cigs, and call me sponser to get through situations with her.....they work for a little while until the next episode.
What scares me is that yesterday, I just saw red and could picture myself just ramming her head through the wall.....and that really shook me up....haven't felt like that in a LONG time.
i hear ya loud and clear. i didn't particularly mean you had to be accomodating or KA, just beat 'em at their own game. let me explain...from the outside of the aquarium, it looks like this person is going out of her way to make you look bad. and to make herself look good to mgmt. that's a given. this game i understand from my own experience (career and MIL from Hades).
the trick is to pave the way for her to make herself look bad (without your direct help) to mgmt, hence encourage her to submit all her bad ideas to mgmt and let her run with the rope.
devious? you betcha. but it places YOUR hands on YOUR steering wheel and you can have a secret chuckle to yourself.
we can never control how people act, but we can control how we react to them. hang in there and definitely look for greener pastures. it's easy to play armchair quarterback. i hope my comments give you a different perspective...the stress you are obviously under is bad news.

"All our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them." - Walt Disney
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