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Re: Retirement Guilt
Old 07-26-2006, 12:36 PM   #21
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Re: Retirement Guilt

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Originally Posted by Nords

I used to be considered too young to drink alcohol or to have sex, either, and I'm sure glad that I didn't defer those activities for someone else's permission!
Don't let your daughter see this post!
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Re: Retirement Guilt
Old 07-26-2006, 01:06 PM   #22
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Re: Retirement Guilt

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Originally Posted by Martha
Don't let your daughter see this post!*
Sex, drugs, rock & roll... we'll be lucky to win one out of three.

But at least she'll feel guilty!
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Re: Retirement Guilt
Old 07-26-2006, 06:44 PM   #23
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Re: Retirement Guilt

I would only feel guilty if I had done something illegal, like embezzelment or stealing from some elderly people.

The funny thing was that not only did I leave the workforce early 50's, I am probably more generous and more well traveled than most of my friends ever thought of being. The difference with us was making some moves to generate high income, two incomes for many years while living on one, and not wasting money on worthless crap. I can't remember the last time I was inside a restaurant but I would rather be home than waste money on food that I can prepare better at home.
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Re: Retirement Guilt
Old 07-26-2006, 06:51 PM   #24
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Re: Retirement Guilt

ShortT:

Well I have certainly been fed "worthless crap" in more than one restaurant. However if I do get the W.C. treatment I don't go back.

In general my wife and I really enjoy eating at restaurants. One can certainly go to restaurants and still save an awful lot of money. They are not exclusive.

The key is balance. Save alot, spend a little on what you really enjoy.

There are many paths to FIRE.
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Re: Retirement Guilt
Old 07-26-2006, 08:05 PM   #25
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Re: Retirement Guilt

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Originally Posted by MasterBlaster
In general my wife and I really enjoy eating at restaurants. One can certainly go to restaurants and still save an awful lot of money. They are not exclusive.

The key is balance. Save alot, spend a little on what you really enjoy.

There are many paths to FIRE.
I agree whole heartedly. I pulled the cord at 57, a few years after many around here. But I have a lot of restaurant meals plugged into my expense calculations.
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Re: Retirement Guilt
Old 07-26-2006, 08:30 PM   #26
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Re: Retirement Guilt

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Originally Posted by donheff
I agree whole heartedly. I pulled the cord at 57, a few years after many around here. But I have a lot of restaurant meals plugged into my expense calculations.
Yep, eating out at restaurants is more than just food for us. We have splurged for a long time on eating out (ever since our nest was empty). Not every meal is gourmet, but we enjoy the relaxed time together, talking up a storm (well, mostly listening up a storm for me ) and savoring good food and service. We do it with friends and also just the two of us. Then again, we rarely go to movies anymore (crowds, prices, garbage on the floor) in favor of DVDs.

Both of us lived in Europe for a while in our youth. The lost art of conversation was much more alive there than here, and that's a big part of eating out for us.

Each to his own.
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Re: Retirement Guilt
Old 10-17-2006, 08:28 AM   #27
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Re: Retirement Guilt

I'll make this short and sweet, I'm 50 retired several weeks ago, and feel real guilty about telling anyone other than my wife, my kids don't even know although at 12 & 17 I think they have an idea. I have no plans to tell anyone and I hope no one asks. Friends and family know I'm not working and my MIL is worried we won't be able to pay the bills if I don't get a job soon. I have no intention of telling anyone until I know without a shadow of a doubt that I can do this on what we have in our portfolio.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it..........So put that in your pipe and smoke it!
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Re: Retirement Guilt
Old 10-17-2006, 08:45 AM   #28
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Re: Retirement Guilt

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Originally Posted by My Dream
my MIL is worried we won't be able to pay the bills if I don't get a job soon.

:P
This made me smile. Up until a couple of years ago my Mom was
still clipping help wanted ads and pointing out job opportunities.

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Re: Retirement Guilt
Old 10-17-2006, 09:54 AM   #29
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Re: Retirement Guilt

Why not just tell everyone you're a "private investor"..............I mean, you all are..............
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Re: Retirement Guilt
Old 10-17-2006, 11:35 AM   #30
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Re: Retirement Guilt

I say I am a portfolio manager. I do manage 3 of them: mine, spouse, MIL.

I guess at some point others will discover your new status and then will wonder why you were reluctant to disclose it.
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Re: Retirement Guilt
Old 10-17-2006, 12:50 PM   #31
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Re: Retirement Guilt

Well the way I see it is.........relatives and friends are driving way better vehicles, go on better vacations, and generally spend more money. The way they probably see it is, they couldn't retire and live like we do. My brother in law told me once that he won't live till 65 so he's going to enjoy life while he's alive. He doesn't live beyond his means but he does live comfortably and should have his house paid off in the next couple of years.

As they say, to each there own.
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Re: Retirement Guilt
Old 10-17-2006, 01:13 PM   #32
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Re: Retirement Guilt

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Originally Posted by kcowan
I say I am a portfolio manager. I do manage 3 of them: mine, spouse, MIL.

I guess at some point others will discover your new status and then will wonder why you were reluctant to disclose it.
Exactly..............I have a client that has been ER'd since 45........... When people used to ask him what he was doing, he would say:

"I am a private investor, and really can't disclose what investments I make due to confidentiality"

I think his "investments" were family vacations, world travel, and fine wine.............
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Re: Retirement Guilt
Old 10-17-2006, 01:22 PM   #33
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Re: Retirement Guilt

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Originally Posted by My Dream
As they say, to each there own.
Well put My Dream!

At the risk of drawing yet more heat on myself, I'll say that some of my fellow posters on this board do tend towards thinking that it's their way or no way. I can't figure out why. A LBYM lifestyle followed by FIRE is right for some, I sure love it, but I certainly understand others chosing their own path.

In regard to telling others I'm RE'd, I doubt there are many folks worth knowing who'd be negatively envious..........unless you got there the easy way (inheritance, etc.) and flaunt it. Our friends know DW and I busted our butts all our lives, pulled ourselves up by our bootstraps, and they always expected we'd RE.

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Re: Retirement Guilt
Old 10-17-2006, 01:51 PM   #34
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Re: Retirement Guilt

I know friends and neighbors right now that want to work till there 65 because they love their jobs, in that they go to work late if they want, sent personal emails, make and receive personal phone calls all day. They have no pressure at work, use up there 6 sick days every year, take home stationary, free pop and packages of coffee every day. There attitude.............retire, are you kidding, they work 4 hours a day and get paid for 8....as well ……..brag about all the fringe benefits.
My situation was that if I didn't work, I didn't get paid (self-employed). Basically the harder I worked the more I got rewarded. The pressure was very high and they just didn't understand why I would want to live below my means and save up only to retire without a new car every 6 years and not live in a nice big house. Although they don't live beyond there means, they are very comfortable in there lifestyle.


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Re: Retirement Guilt
Old 10-17-2006, 01:52 PM   #35
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Re: Retirement Guilt

I think many people are pre-conditioned to work until certain age. I also think that many people wouldn't know what to do with themselves if they retired young.

Since I don't belong to either of the mentioned above, I wouldn't feel guilty if I was retired. Not at all.

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Re: Retirement Guilt
Old 10-17-2006, 02:04 PM   #36
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Re: Retirement Guilt

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Originally Posted by HaHa
Most successful working people not only do not envy us, they think we are ... just plain nuts.

Ha
We're not?
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Re: Retirement Guilt
Old 10-17-2006, 02:07 PM   #37
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Re: Retirement Guilt

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nords
I used to be considered too young to drink alcohol or to have sex, either, and I'm sure glad that I didn't defer those activities for someone else's permission!


Hey, I'm liking this thread more and more!
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Re: Retirement Guilt
Old 10-17-2006, 03:22 PM   #38
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Re: Retirement Guilt

No guilt here. When I finally bail (soon) I'll have 30+ years of service....so what if I started young. When they've worked 30 years in the same organization they have my permission to retire, too.
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Re: Retirement Guilt
Old 10-17-2006, 03:34 PM   #39
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Re: Retirement Guilt

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Originally Posted by Mountain_Mike
No guilt here. When I finally bail (soon) I'll have 30+ years of service....so what if I started young. When they've worked 30 years in the same organization they have my permission to retire, too.
Excellent point..............

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Re: Retirement Guilt
Old 10-17-2006, 10:32 PM   #40
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Re: Retirement Guilt

I cut back to half time a couple years ago now. For the first time in years, maybe a couple decades, I had the time to slow down and have time for myself. I feel like I saved my own life with that move.

At the same time, my best friend was having bad problems at work. The work was terrible, her boss was harrassing her, and she was sick all the time. I felt bad, because I had solved my problem, but I couldn't do anything for her except suggest that she explore whether she could drop to half-time, too.

Well, she thought it over. She is quite frugal, lives in a very modest home which is paid for, and she figured out that by making a few modest budget changes, she could manage on half-time. Also, she found that she would still be eligible for her pension, health benefits, etc. at half time. So there was no reason not to.

She is now feeling great and looking so much happier and healthier. She only works 3 days a week. Her husband had switched to seasonal work some time ago, so now they both have plenty of time together.

So it may be that we are setting a good example for our friends. Not everyone thinks ER or working less is crazy--some just haven't realized yet it might be an option for them.
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