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Old 12-04-2012, 02:25 PM   #21
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I keep in touch with co-workers from all my former places of employment. Some I expected to keep in touch with, but I would say that most are quite unexpected. We didn't seem so close when we worked together.
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Old 12-04-2012, 03:40 PM   #22
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I was friends with only a few people during the last half of my career at mega corp, I worked alone and loved it during that period. When I 1st started we were a group of about 17-18 but they all went off to other projects. Once a year several of us from that original group have lunch and I really enjoy it. I am in touch with 1 sometimes another person from my later years but I never worked with them just sat near them. Sometimes I call or email 2 of those originals but if I don't initiate it it wouldn't happen.
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Old 12-04-2012, 05:26 PM   #23
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My last year of work a couple colleagues asked if I was going to miss not being around all my friends at work. I told them probably not because they are my work friends not my social friends. If you do not socialize with someone outside of the workforce the "friendship" will die off. That is usually how the way it is. And in my case I found that out to be true. The community is small enough where I still see them around and we say hi and talk for a minute, but who you socialize on the weekends with are the ones you will continue to do so. While I was working, I kind of thought of myself as an outgoing person, but in retirement I have found myself to be an introvert enjoying my time alone. I basically enjoy only socializing with 4 friends, and my GF.
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Old 12-04-2012, 05:47 PM   #24
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I just went to our retiree Christmas luncheon and chinese gift exchange today. There were 11 of us there (2 retirees could not make it due to health problems). We meet monthly at different restaurants for 10 months of the year, have the Christmas luncheon at the same lady's house every year and have a picnic at the park every Sept and invite our male retiree co-workers also. I am going on a cruise in January with 3 of the retirees. We do other trips from time to time. I worked with some of these ladies for 20 something years. They know me better than some of my family.
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Old 12-04-2012, 06:19 PM   #25
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This is starting to be very true. I look back and say, "What the heck made me think I couldn't do that? Boy I wish I had done it!"

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I
It’s everything you didn’t do that will bug the heck out of you."
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Old 12-04-2012, 06:58 PM   #26
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"Make your days worth remembering

There’s two kinds of people – the ones who live hard and the ones who take it easy. The hard livers are rough on themselves. They take chances. They never stay comfortable for too long. The easy livers play it safe. They never push themselves. One year runs into the next, because the years are all basically the same.

To youngsters, I say, live hard. This is your one and only life, the only show in town. You can’t get any of your days back. Live as if you’re going to be old someday, looking back on everything you did. It’s everything you didn’t do that will bug the heck out of you."
This makes me sad and I'm not sure quite why. I think it's because I'm too old now to live hard and take chances.

I'll have to think about it. Thanks for sharing Middy.
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Old 12-04-2012, 08:50 PM   #27
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Facebook is not only enough contact with old friends & shipmates, it's also cured me of any desire to go to a physical reunion.

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OMG I have got to hurry the f up and have some more fun...NOW! If that isn't a wake up call, I don't know what is. Eeeek! I mean, it is working for you and all, but that is def not what I want to have happen to us! Do not go gently into that good night, and all that. What you described is how my parents are now, and they used to be a lot of fun. Now they sit around at home and do nothing, unless we invite them, or it involves their grandchildren.
My second wake-up call in a few days courtesy of the forum--the other being the old man in Walmart line from Lazarus. I feel time is a'wastin' already!
Sarah, that's how you feel now, but when you're in your 70s you may feel quite differently. It's not good or bad, just age appropriate.

You should do things because you want to do them, not because you're driving yourself to collect merit badges...
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Old 12-05-2012, 06:31 AM   #28
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You should do things because you want to do them, not because you're driving yourself to collect merit badges...
++ I have vacationed with a few Energizer Bunnies who can drive you nuts trying to cram every possible activity in regardless whether they might actually be fun. Makes me think of the old "Trip to Abilene," groupthink management development story.
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Old 12-05-2012, 07:46 AM   #29
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DW is retired four years now and was still getting together with her former co-workers, largely at her instigation. That is starting to slow down now as it has become apparent that is one-sided (last second cancellations and no shows). She enjoyed hearing the b*tching about office politics, but now realizes that part of her life is over.

I have been retired two years and have only attended a single lunch with a couple of my former employees. They related (with no ill-intention) how my replacement basically threw out all the policies and procedures I had put in place over 12 years. I decided I did not wish to stay engaged with this. It did bother me. Better to not know and think your contributions were still appreciated.
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Old 12-05-2012, 10:42 AM   #30
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You should do things because you want to do them, not because you're driving yourself to collect merit badges...
True dat, but I can't see regretting those merit badges when I'm older, just regretting the ones I didn't pick up out of fear or laziness. And how do you know, really, which ones are just bragging rights and which ones are the life's work kind of things?

Midpack, thanks for the great link. I want to be a hard liver, just like HFWR's liver. Wait, there's a song in there... Oh yeah, Hays Carll.
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Old 12-05-2012, 12:46 PM   #31
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True dat, but I can't see regretting those merit badges when I'm older, just regretting the ones I didn't pick up out of fear or laziness. And how do you know, really, which ones are just bragging rights and which ones are the life's work kind of things?
I agree that most accomplishments are more difficult with age, but I watch a vocal minority of my college classmates involved in "competitive travel drinking" through our alumni association. It's not so pretty.

If you're doing it because you want to then it's probably best done while you're younger. But the flowers in my back yard smell just as good as any others anywhere in the world.
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Old 12-05-2012, 02:45 PM   #32
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I agree that most accomplishments are more difficult with age, but I watch a vocal minority of my college classmates involved in "competitive travel drinking" through our alumni association. It's not so pretty.

If you're doing it because you want to then it's probably best done while you're younger. But the flowers in my back yard smell just as good as any others anywhere in the world.
Ah, okay, I think I know those people, too.

The ones that say you MUST go to Costa Rica, it is so perfect, everyone speaks English and you have to go to this great bar in blah blah blah.

Or, me and the wife just went to Antarctica to check off the last continent on our list.

I don't care much for them, either, come to think of it.

But, here's where us coming from different perspectives comes in: you remember that x years ago you were stationed in Charleston for x months/years before moving on to x?

Yeah, so I've been "stationed" in Charleston for 42 years as of the week after next. So I've got more travel coming to me than you might care to do, simply because I've always lived in one place.

This is why it is such a benefit to me to read the perspectives of others who have lived so differently than me.
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Old 12-05-2012, 06:10 PM   #33
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They related (with no ill-intention) how my replacement basically threw out all the policies and procedures I had put in place over 12 years. I decided I did not wish to stay engaged with this. It did bother me. Better to not know and think your contributions were still appreciated.
Dear Ngudu, I recently retired as Assistant Vice President at Woodman of the World Insurance Company ...
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Old 12-05-2012, 06:23 PM   #34
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Old 12-05-2012, 09:18 PM   #35
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I find that I have very few "work" friends that I have stayed in touch with over the years, but have maintained the friendship with my Navy brothers for over 30 years. But then those were more than just "work" friends. My life depended on them (and theirs with me). I wonder how different my life would have been had I not dropped out of law school and gone on to become a Naval Aviator. I shudder to think of it LOL!
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Old 12-05-2012, 10:02 PM   #36
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Had after-w**k drinks and snacks with two of my closest w**k friends just a few hours ago. The other two keep the meetings going. I never initiate, but am always happy to see them again. Also see my third good friend w**k friend now and again.

The other co-workers, who I so enjoyed visiting with in the halls, don't initiate and i am too busy enjoying retirement to try. Recently deleted FB account for several reasons.

It is okay; the balance is fine. I miss visiting with them, but not enough to have stayed. oh nooooooo
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Old 12-05-2012, 10:50 PM   #37
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Yeah, so I've been "stationed" in Charleston for 42 years as of the week after next. So I've got more travel coming to me than you might care to do, simply because I've always lived in one place.
This is why it is such a benefit to me to read the perspectives of others who have lived so differently than me.
Here's a dose of irony.

When we were stationed in San Diego (our 17th move) we lived next to Ted & Nancy. Nancy had lived in that house for 38 years. She'd moved into it when she'd married Ted. Before that the only place she'd ever lived was in her family home with her Mom & Dad... and that family home was right around the corner.

She's a woman in her sixties who'd grown up in a one-block area. She didn't just have friends & neighbors from college & high school. She had friends from pre-school. They'd all get together over adult beverages to commiserate how they were still getting lectured by their mothers who still kept track of their activities.

My spouse and I had never lived anywhere for more than a decade. We couldn't fathom how anyone could be so privileged to put down such deep roots. The place where we live today, for just over 12 years, is the longest that either of us has ever lived anywhere. There's even rash talk of passing it down to our daughter.

So perhaps you and I are both suffering from hedonic adaptation and grass-is-greener syndrome...
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Old 12-06-2012, 07:50 AM   #38
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Ran into an old co worker at the Delta Holiday Military Lounge in the Atlanta Airport. She is now an 06 (Colonel) and was returning from a TDY (business trip), we were coming home from a 15 day Hawaii cruise. She still doesn't know what she will do when her time is up (less than 2 years). I kinda enjoyed hearing about all my old co workers, she is now their bosses. I realized how I don't miss the "game" at all, but she did remind me that I was very good at it, which I appreciated more than I thought I would. She was amazed that we had not gone back to work and that I had stuck to our retirement plan (she knew about it our ER plans, yes I was kinda vocal about it for the last year or so of my military career).

Any vet or service member flying from/into Hartsfield Airport in Atlanta. The Delta employees have for over 40 years sponsored a holiday military lounge. This year it is in the b concourse across from gate b33. If anything, stop by and let the volunteers know you appreciate it. The USO is also available, but you have to go through security to get to it.
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