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The next generation seizes the torch...
Old 10-19-2004, 03:51 PM   #1
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The next generation seizes the torch...

... and squashes it.

th, you should probably stop reading now and skip to a different post. No, seriously, I mean it.

OK, I tried to warn you.

Our kid saved months of allowance to buy a personal bedroom phone. Never mind that the cute & parentally-provided push-button Snoopy/Woodstock phone (garage sale, $5) is probably selling on eBay for $50. This purchase had to be scrutinized, agonized, & personalized. $40 (and 40 minutes) later a vTech cordless phone was selected from the display racks.

(For those of you without tweens, a cordless phone empowers you to lose the receiver all over the house instead of in just your bedroom. If you don't understand how anyone could lose a corded receiver, then you don't have a tween.)

It turns out that the reason a new phone is imperative is because it's equipped with-- no, not the latest technology. Not the cleanest signal/noise ratio. Not even long-lived NiMH batteries. No, it has CHANGEABLE COLOR TRIM PIECES!! And RING TONES!!!

As if Madison Ave wasn't already snickering up their sleeves, we were treated to a ring-tone recital. The demo was forcibly terminated after two melodies-- the theme from the movie "Rocky" and "We Will Rock You". Both were played on a sappy little tone generator one generation dumber than Muzak and only slightly better than a kazoo.

Somewhere Freddie Mercury is whirling in his grave over the rancid commercialism of a generational anthem.

The kid has no idea what a Rocky movie is. For her punishment, we're gonna make her watch all of them.

I'm sure things will be better when we're at DisneyWorld... no, wait, I think it's when she's old enough to drive herself on her own dates. Yeah, that's it.

The book written on, "The Military Guide to Financial Independence and Retirement", on sale now! For more info see "About Me" in my profile.
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