To Me, This is Sad.........:(

SHould probably be moved to Other Topics...sorry.........:(
 
OK, did so for you. Thanks for pointing that out.

And yes, I agree that it is sad! The breakdown of families as we know them seems to be eliminating fathers from the equation. Fathers can be a huge influence on many kids and it is sad that all these kids don't have a father. Makes more work for the mothers, too.
 
I remember an article in Newsweek (?) in the 70s about the same issue - The title was:
"The death of Shame"
I wish I could find that article - it was great.
 
I can't imagine growing up without a dad. Of course, my mom died when I was 5, and my dad remarried, because HE didn't want to be alone, and he wanted US to have a mom.........

I already SCARED my kids my telling them if they are ever on national tv in sports, and don't say "HI DAD"!!, along with the standard "HI MOM"!!!!, don't bother asking for money ever again............:)
 
There was no such thing as a sex education class when I went to school.

I had the beejeebers scared out of me when a couple of girls I knew had to "go away" for a while. It's sad when fear keeps you guessing....
 
Sweden's rate of unwed mothers is higher (55% in 2003), but it's because many couples there choose to not get married. I wonder if that situation contributes to the statistic here.
 
TromboneAl said:
Sweden's rate of unwed mothers is higher (55% in 2003), but it's because many couples there choose to not get married. I wonder if that situation contributes to the statistic here.
Click to expand...

I doubt to any great extent. It's true that the marriage penalty is alive and well here in the good ole USA. But, I don't think the number of couples chosing to not wed, despite being parents, just to pay lower taxes is very large.
 
bbbamI said:
There was no such thing as a sex education class when I went to school.
Click to expand...
So everyone resorted to good ol' OJT ? :cool:
Just kidding...Our sex ed consisted of a 5th grade "Becoming a Woman" class without any sex ed, followed by a senior year of HS Health class. Both were taught by nuns. :LOL:
My older sister gave me a great book called "The Student's Guide to Sex on Campus" when she came back from her freshman year. This was my best sex ed source ever.
Planned Parenthood was not available to minors, even in liberal NY until you turned 18. Neither were condoms, but there was 1 drugstore pharmacist who didn't ask about age.
 
"It is not uncommon to hear an infected child on the playground pleading "spray me! spray me!" to his/her classmates."


Lol..that had me giggling at the computer.
 
TromboneAl said:
Sweden's rate of unwed mothers is higher (55% in 2003), but it's because many couples there choose to not get married. I wonder if that situation contributes to the statistic here.
Click to expand...

This is anecdotal, but as the father of an unwed mother I have some experience.

We know at least a dozen unwed mothers. With the younger ones (like DD), it is mostly due to the father either bailing completely, or at least deciding he doesn't want to be married. But we also know quite a few older (than late teens early 20s) moms who choose to have babies without getting married. They either do the sperm donor thing, or in some cases ask a guy to get them pregnant with no strings attached. One of the guys stays involved somewhat, but the others aren't in the picture.

I'm not defending the practice, but I think if they did a study about intentional vs. unintentional motherhood, they'd get a lot more concious decisions than you might think.

Personally, I never had a father (divorce at an early age), so I can't say how big a deal it is. You grow up thinking your situation is normal, no matter what it is. You pretty much make your own way in life, and one parent can impart good (or crappy) values as easily as two.
 
harley said:
We know at least a dozen unwed mothers. With the younger ones (like DD), it is mostly due to the father either bailing completely, or at least deciding he doesn't want to be married. But we also know quite a few older (than late teens early 20s) moms who choose to have babies without getting married. They either do the sperm donor thing, or in some cases ask a guy to get them pregnant with no strings attached. One of the guys stays involved somewhat, but the others aren't in the picture.
Click to expand...

I think DIVORCE is MUCH DIFFERENT than being an INTENTIONAL single mom.

Personally, I never had a father (divorce at an early age), so I can't say how big a deal it is. You grow up thinking your situation is normal, no matter what it is. You pretty much make your own way in life, and one parent can impart good (or crappy) values as easily as two.
Click to expand...

Well, you DO have a father, whether you have a relationship with him does not change the fact that you DO have a father........;)
 
harley said:
They either do the sperm donor thing, or in some cases ask a guy to get them pregnant with no strings attached.
Click to expand...

Are these heterosexual women? That truly seems an odd approach for a still young heterosexual woman.

If I were asked to be the donor I would run like hell. I can imagine the judge's reaction when I said, "But You Honor, she said no strings attached!"

Ha
 
haha said:
Are these heterosexual women? That truly seems an odd approach for a still young heterosexual woman.

If I were asked to be the donor I would run like hell. I can imagine the judge's reaction when I said, "But You Honor, she said no strings attached!"

Ha
Click to expand...

Maybe there was a "waiver of responsibility" he signed........:rolleyes::ROFLMAO:

I guess the bottom line is that it is much more common than we think,and that to me is quite telling of our society.........:nonono:
 
There is no such thing as a "waiver of responsibility" (short of artificial insemination under a MD's care) if the child comes to the attention of the Court and needs support. That promise is about as good as the promise 'I'll love you in the morning'.
 
haha said:
Are these heterosexual women? That truly seems an odd approach for a still young heterosexual woman.

If I were asked to be the donor I would run like hell. I can imagine the judge's reaction when I said, "But You Honor, she said no strings attached!"

Ha
Click to expand...

Both. I think most went the sperm donor path. Even the one I know who chose the father may have done artificial insemination, if there are any legal protections that way. I don't know her well enough to ask at that level of detail.

Y'all are right, I don't think there is any kind of waiver that would hold up. It would have to be a decision based on trust, and I don't trust that well.

But no matter which way it's done, I think there are a growing number of women who want children but don't see any particualr reason to put up with a man in the process. Not sure it's a good idea, but I think it contributes to the numbers shown in the OP.

Well, you DO have a father, whether you have a relationship with him does not change the fact that you DO have a father........;)
Click to expand...

Actually, I think my mom had a sperm donor. To me a father implies involvement. But in the context of the OP, some were talking about the importance of a father in the family. I don't disagree that a good and caring father is a help in a family. But lack of one isn't the kiss of death.
 
Last edited:
Hey, I would definitely do the sperm donor route if I am still single and unmarried by 37. I should be well situated in my new career by then and be able to offer a great home to a child. Since most marriages end (60%) and the mothers end up taking care of the kids anyway!
 
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