Two regrets,,,

[LeatherneckPA]

My father passed away on February 17, 2008. Dad was 77 years old and had been married to Mom for 50 years. He raised four sons, none with criminal records, and all four were US Marines. The only grandchild he really had anything to do with is a veteran of the US Air Force.

Dad, himself, was a veteran of WWII. He enlisted in 1945 using a phony birth certificate forged by his younger brother who later became a graphic artist and draftsman. He never went to war because it ended just before he graduated from Fort Dix.

My only regrets are that I did not have enough time with him, because they moved to FL and that he never got to see any of his sons retire.

 

[Twinkle Toes]

I'm sorry for your loss.

 

[JPatrick]

Very sorry for your loss Leatherneck.
Your Dad, along with help from your Mom I'm sure, put together quite a remarkable family and marriage.
When I lost my Mom, not too many years ago, and DW when she lost hers, we both felt as you do. We should have spent more time together. Now that a few years have passed we realize that all parties did their best given all the circumstances. We now concentrate on the good times and dismiss the regrets.


And if you don't mind a little side note---
I've known many Marines in my day, but never have I seen four together with no criminal records.

 

[FinanceDude]

My condoleances to pass along. I know what it is like to lose a parent............you did your best over the years, remember that..........Dads of that generation didn't dote on their sons, they just had unspoken "expectations".........

 

[REWahoo]

My sincere condolences for your loss.

As JPatrick said, you should not dwell on what wasn't, but instead focus on what was. My dad died 10 years ago and I give no thought whatsoever to regrets, only to the fond memories I have of him.

He raised four sons, none with criminal records, and all four were US Marines. The only grandchild he really had anything to do with is a veteran of the US Air Force.

I salute your dad's ability to overcome adversity and concentrate on the positive.

Aim High,
REW

 

[W2R]

My father passed away on February 17, 2008. Dad was 77 years old and had been married to Mom for 50 years. He raised four sons, none with criminal records, and all four were US Marines. The only grandchild he really had anything to do with is a veteran of the US Air Force.

Dad, himself, was a veteran of WWII. He enlisted in 1945 using a phony birth certificate forged by his younger brother who later became a graphic artist and draftsman. He never went to war because it ended just before he graduated from Fort Dix.

My only regrets are that I did not have enough time with him, because they moved to FL and that he never got to see any of his sons retire.

My deepest condolences. Losing a parent is never easy, and I wish the best for you and your family.

 

[lazygood4nothinbum]

condolence from me too leatherneck. though i had just the opposite: lots of time with mom but if she ever knew i wasn't working she'd've risen from the grave to find me a job. so if you wouldn't mind, please have your dad talk to my mom about the benefits of early retirement. thank you.

 

[Texas Proud]

Sorry to hear about your loss..

I lost a BIL in Nov.... not as close, but still a loss... so I understand...

Take care.. and make sure your mother goes to a grief class soon... it has helped my sister a lot.

 

[Achiever51]

Sorry to hear of your loss. Doesn't matter how old we are when it happens, but losing a parent is a tough loss.

I lost my mom nearly 15 years ago -- very suddenly. Had we given even a moment to think about it, my brother and I (and my dad) would have thought that Dad would have been the first to go as he was the one with health problems. But in retrospect, losing my mom first was in a way a blessing.

Why?

Well, I was always close to my mom and felt that I knew her very well. My father, on the other hand, was a typical WWII generation dad, a bit distant, not too "touchy-feely." Had he died before my mom did, my relationship with my mom wouldn't have changed -- and I would have never had the opportunity to really get to know my Dad. So after Mom died, I made a promise to her and to myself that I would get to know my Dad in whatever time we had left together.

He's now 89 and I have to say the last 15 years have been a blessing. We go to lunch every week or so and I've learned all about his family's history, which was pretty much a blank slate when I was growing up. I've really gotten to know him as a father and as a friend and it's been great. And last summer, I fulfilled one of his biggest wishes...I took him to visit the World War II Memorial in Washington DC, where he was treated like a returning hero. For him it was like a pilgrimage.

Bottom line: I learned to relish every day with those I love...and don't wait till tomorrow.

 

[freebird5825]

i am sorry for your loss.

My uncle did the same thing - lied about his age and went into the Navy in WWII at 17. He did a 30 year tour.

in the past 6 years, i lost my mom, then DH. it was really really tough at first, but i learned to hold onto the fun things we did together. visits were infrequent in my mom's case due to distance. but we had some great phone talks.

i wish you strength and good memories.

 

[LeatherneckPA]

and make sure your mother goes to a grief class soon....

ROFLMAO!!! Not much chance of THAT! After they amputated her leg last year the home sent a psych around twice to visit with her. The first time she told him she didn't need his help. Sure she was a little down, but she'd just lost a leg. Wouldn't he be? The second tie he came she told him that if he came back again she'd beat him with her crutch. I'm sure she cried/cries about it, but mostly she says she's mad because he got to go first and left her holding the bag.

 

[megacorp-firee]

Sorry for your loss.

You have reinforced my desire to do things that are important to me ... like staying connected with family and friends.
DW and I are spending 5 months in Asia for that reason (along with traveling). We will continue to winter here and stay connected with our family and friends for as long as we can. Her family is all here and she spent the last 33 years raising our family in the US. The rest of the time will be spent in the US with our family and friends there.

Thanks for sharing.

 

[Walt34]

I am sorry to learn of your loss.

My mother died in January '99, DW's mother died the following June. Even when you know it's coming doesn't make it hurt any less.

Losing both of them in a short time was part of the decision to retire and give up the higher incomes we would have had if we'd stayed working. We have all the time we want to spend with family and friends, which is what matters. Fortunately they are all local so we don't have to travel far to see them.