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Old 03-13-2008, 08:05 AM   #121
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The other way I look at is, when you're fishing with $5000 hookers as bait. You KNOW you're going to catch something big.

-CC
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Old 03-13-2008, 10:50 AM   #122
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Originally Posted by brewer12345 View Post
Maybe that happens between a two men. Unless there is a dollar amount involved, I have a hard time this EVER happens between a man and a woman.
search criteria: nsa or no string
catagories searched: strictly platonic; w4w; w4m; m4m; m4w; casual encounters.
dates searched: march 1 to current

unscientific fort lauderdale craigs list survey says:

m4m 119 ads
m4w 108 ads
w4m 19 ads
w4w 4 ads
m4t 3 ads

these numbers might just indicate that men are more open about talking about their feelings.
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Old 03-13-2008, 10:56 AM   #123
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NSA sex........what about the college years??.........
Speak for yourself. Although I lived in a cooperative dorm that had co-ed open room showers (pass me the shampoo, please), I was engaged by my junior year.

My comment was more based on a failure to buy the idea t hat there are ever no strings attached.
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Old 03-13-2008, 11:06 AM   #124
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More salacious details...

Emperors Club: All About Eliot Spitzer's Alleged Prostitution Ring - Politics on The Huffington Post
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Old 03-13-2008, 11:53 AM   #125
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I would be past livid if I was his spouse. And it isn't so much the sex. It is the participation in a crime. Even if it shouldn't be a crime, it is and crime and he was in a position where he can't commit high profile crimes. She was a high powered well paid corporate lawyer. She gave that up for her family and his career. He screwed it up for both of them. And now she has to be subject to comments like Ha's that maybe she didn't give him what he needed or was not good in bed.

He wanted what he wanted. He needed to restrain himself or get out of public life.
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Old 03-13-2008, 12:19 PM   #126
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IAnd now she has to be subject to comments like Ha's that maybe she didn't give him what he needed or was not good in bed.
BTW, were you similarly livid about Mr Clinton? Most feminists were not. He was credibly charged with rape, though it never came to anything on investigation.

If every public official who has slept with a prostitute were to quit, the offices might have more than one vacancy.

I agree with you that it was bad judgment, but so are a lot of other things like taking bribes, or accepting campaign contributions from crooks and foreign nationals. Mr. Gore seems to have survived that pretty well. We usually don't suggest that these men be bobbited. Or should all men whose moral lapses create hardships for their wives be violently emasculated?

I also think that what a man or woman does sexually is usually conditioned by what they are getting or not getting at home.

Another angle is that Silda, since she is an attorney, is better able to go to work than the typical woman who is economically challenged by her husbands sudden inablility to provide-should this in fact ever be the case.

Lastly, given your feelings about it, how do you come down on the advisability and excusability of bobbiting for mr Spitzer?

Ha
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Old 03-13-2008, 12:24 PM   #127
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Deep breaths, Ha.

I never liked the guy, but I at least had some respect for him. No longer, of course.

Frankly, what happened to him is what should have happened: defenestrated from the governor's mansion, law license in jeopardy, potentially looking at jail time.

I don't find the whole call girl thing much other than distasteful. The real issue here is the overwhelming hypocrisy, not the sex. I'd imagine that is more an issue between Spitzer and his (soon to be ex) wife.
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Old 03-13-2008, 12:37 PM   #128
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BTW, were you similarly livid about Mr Clinton? Most feminists were not. He was credibly charged with rape, though it never came to anything on investigation.
I was major mad at him for the lying because it effected his ability to get good things done. He should have said yes, I had sex with that woman.

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If every public official who has slept with a prostitute were to quit, the offices might have more than one vacancy.
Yes. And I don't necessarily think that selling sex should be illegal. But it is illegal and plenty of people think it should be illegal. So if you see a prostitute or worse, turn it into a federal crime via the Mann Act, then you as a public person are putting yourself and very likely your family at risk. As you say, bad judgment. For another point of view on legalizing prostitution: Prostitution scandals no surprise to women who know industry - TwinCities.com Apparently Sweden is punishing the men who use prostitutes, not the women, on the theory that the women are exploited. Certainly, most women engaging in prostitution have a host of problems and are exploited.

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I agree with you that it was bad judgment, but so are a lot of other things like taking bribes, or accepting campaign contributions from crooks and foreign nationals. Mr. Gore seems to have survived that pretty well. We usually don't suggest that these men be bobbited. Or should all men whose moral lapses create hardships for their wives be violently emasculated?
No, I am not defending "bobbiting" in any way.

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I also think that what a man or woman does sexually is usually conditioned by what they are getting or not getting at home.
I think this certainly could be the case if someone has a "traditional" affair. I don't think it is the case so much with men who frequent prostitutes or have sex with a lot of women.
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Old 03-13-2008, 12:55 PM   #129
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Martha, good comments. I like them about as much as I like my own.

Much of the world could not function without prostitutes. But that is one prohibition that is never likely to go away in USA.

Ha
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Old 03-13-2008, 12:56 PM   #130
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Much of the world could not function without prostitutes. Ha
Care to elaborate?
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Old 03-13-2008, 12:59 PM   #131
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I think this certainly could be the case if someone has a "traditional" affair. I don't think it is the case so much with men who frequent prostitutes or have sex with a lot of women.
there you go again, thinking like a woman. but that only holds water for the guy who has a lot of women at home.

NO 1-night stand, BUT ongoing love affair wanted

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I'm NOT looking for just quick, emotionless or casual sex, because I’m not that kind of guy, but rather need to feel comfortable first with whomever I might later end up getting intimate with. Yes, I am in search of sexual encounters and I'm married, so technically that makes me “unfaithful” (whatever that means in such a non-monogamous culture). But I am also aware enough of my own feelings to know that I'm not looking for a one-night stand.
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Old 03-13-2008, 01:27 PM   #132
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Care to elaborate?
I am most familiar with Latin America, and I am less current than I once was. But no man I knew, from wealthy landowners to middle class doctors and professors to peasants felt that he should avoid prostitutes. The only difference was that the poor man couldn't afford it very often, and his possibilities were not as cute.

I've been to dinner with a nice young family, professional Dad, stay at home Mom, 2 bright kids. After an extremely nice dinner and warm pleasant conversation La Mamá would get up to bus the dishes, and my host would lean over and say, Ha-a-a, ¡Vamos a las muchachas! ¡Pronto!

Kind of unfair to her by my northern POV, but later I realized that among other things this was their social compact. Middle class women could play-act in a way that made them comfortable, men could play in a way that they enjoyed, and in the bargain birth control was achieved.

For an interesting look at the central role of prostitution in another society, read Naguib Mafouz, particularly Palace Walk or the rest of that trilogy.

Ha
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Old 03-13-2008, 01:36 PM   #133
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I'd be livid if I was his wife not only the sex but the fact he put me at a risk of disease . I certainly don't believe in bobbiting anyone but I would not be above tossing his clothes on the lawn .
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Old 03-13-2008, 01:37 PM   #134
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For an interesting look at the central role of prostitution in another society, read Naguib Mafouz, particularly Palace Walk or the rest of that trilogy.

Ha
The Amazon reviews sound promising so I ordered it from the library. Always glad for a new literary reference. Thanks Ha.
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Old 03-13-2008, 01:39 PM   #135
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His gal is recorded as saying to her handler that "Elliott never does anything unsafe."

Hey, he might use condoms at home! Or maybe there isn't anything going on at home.

Ha
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Old 03-13-2008, 02:32 PM   #136
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I truly hope you are joking. The guy had sex; if he didn't need it he wouldn't have done it.

Brave Silda may be totally useless in bed; maybe she refuses accommodations that he needs.

If you are serious, you are offbase. If you are correct about a female jury not convicting, you are describing jury nullification a serious matter in a democracy.



Ha

I'm guy so I can understand the desire to get some on the side. That being said Spitzer position, and hollier than thou attitude make it impossible for me to feel any sympathy. This is not Latin America, Italy, or Asia mistresses and prostitutes aren't acceptable behavior especially for high profile AGs.

However, what I find unforgivable is the public humuliation that he subjected her to standing by his side etc hence my sympathy for her. In an eye for eye system of justice I'd say doing a Bobbit on the prick isn't over the top. John Wayne Bobbit made a full recover, eventually appeared in porno film, who know Elliot Spitzer maybe into pain. He certainly is good at dishing it out.
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Old 03-13-2008, 02:55 PM   #137
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isn't a lot of this rather presumptuous and based upon how a person thinks others should live their lives. do we get a say in that? would you like others to have a say in yours?

as ha has tried to point out, nobody here knows if there was even sex involved in the marriage. this is probably off base but just to make the point: for all anyone knows, the wife might have been his pimp.

i do not believe everything i read in the news or watch on tv. i do not believe that a magician can make the statue of liberty disappear just because it seemed that way on the boob tube.

what i do believe is that if this country wasn't so juvenile & inhibited by something as basic as a bodily function, this wouldn't even be an issue.
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Old 03-13-2008, 03:06 PM   #138
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what i do believe is that if this country wasn't so juvenile & inhibited by something as basic as a bodily function, this wouldn't even be an issue.
Since we are casting labels about--is it more juvenile to view sex as "just a bodily function" or to view it as, possibly, something more? Maybe when it is a solo event we are talking about a bodily function, but I'm fairly sure that many believe it is appropriate to view it as something more-in most cases. Even if we disregard emotional linkagess, at the very least, there are pregnancy and disease issues. You know this.

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i wouldn't know, personally, as i'm not permitted to marry.
Not to split hairs, but since you have brought this up before: you enjoy the same marriage rights as anyone else. I can marry a woman, I cannot marry a man.

(Hoping this won't be controversial),
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Old 03-13-2008, 04:00 PM   #139
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sex as "just a bodily function" or to view it as, possibly, something more? Maybe when it is a solo event we are talking about a bodily function, but I'm fairly sure that many believe it is appropriate to view it as something more-in most cases. Even if we disregard emotional linkagess, at the very least, there are pregnancy and disease issues. You know this.
So we should let the lack of good science dictate morale; how convenient an argument for religion. Does taking inconvenience and turn it into policy justify your dominance over another person’s life? well good for you that you think you are so qualified.
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Not to split hairs, but since you have brought this up before: you enjoy the same marriage rights as anyone else. I can marry a woman, I cannot marry a man.
since you have made this obvious so many times, the only thing more unfair than me not being able to marry a man is you not being allowed to marry a pig.
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Old 03-13-2008, 04:32 PM   #140
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since you have made this obvious so many times, the only thing more unfair than me not being able to marry a man is you not being allowed to marry a pig.
Very nice. "I'm rubber, you're glue . . .nyah nya nya nya nya"
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