Join Early Retirement Today
Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Useless Devices - just shake your head
Old 01-28-2010, 01:34 PM   #1
Administrator
Janet H's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Pacific NW
Posts: 4,957
Useless Devices - just shake your head

I saw a new one last night. This tops the salad shooter, personal fan and has dethroned beer hat. What other useless devices have you seen?

__________________

__________________
E-R.org Custom Google Search | You're only given a little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it. (Robin Williams)
Janet H is offline   Reply With Quote
Join the #1 Early Retirement and Financial Independence Forum Today - It's Totally Free!

Are you planning to be financially independent as early as possible so you can live life on your own terms? Discuss successful investing strategies, asset allocation models, tax strategies and other related topics in our online forum community. Our members range from young folks just starting their journey to financial independence, military retirees and even multimillionaires. No matter where you fit in you'll find that Early-Retirement.org is a great community to join. Best of all it's totally FREE!

You are currently viewing our boards as a guest so you have limited access to our community. Please take the time to register and you will gain a lot of great new features including; the ability to participate in discussions, network with our members, see fewer ads, upload photographs, create a retirement blog, send private messages and so much, much more!

Old 01-28-2010, 02:13 PM   #2
Moderator
Walt34's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Eastern WV Panhandle
Posts: 16,544
For myself, I have yet to see anything that tops Pet Rocks for the ultimate in pure marketing.

People paid $5 each for them. I guess it was only those who didn't have enough in their heads already.
__________________

__________________
I heard the call to do nothing. So I answered it.
Walt34 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-28-2010, 02:24 PM   #3
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 7,530
But wait, there's more! A free microwave bacon rack. Mmmm... omelets and bacon.

I was really hoping that instead of a microwave bacon rack, the "but wait there's more" reveal would have them selling not 1 but 2 EZ Crackers for $19.99 (plus S+H). One for home use, one for the office.
__________________
Retired in 2013 at age 33. Keeping busy reading, blogging, relaxing, gaming, and enjoying the outdoors with my wife and 3 kids (5, 11, and 12).
FUEGO is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-28-2010, 02:25 PM   #4
gone traveling
 
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 3,864
I wanted to buy a salad shooter, but they required a three-day waiting period....
__________________
Westernskies is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-28-2010, 03:07 PM   #5
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
bbbamI's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Dallas 'burb
Posts: 9,039
Quote:
Originally Posted by Westernskies View Post
I wanted to buy a salad shooter, but they required a three-day waiting period....
__________________
There's no need to complicate, our time is short..
bbbamI is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-28-2010, 03:07 PM   #6
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
harley's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Following the nice weather
Posts: 6,430
This one beats them all for me.



__________________
"Good judgment comes from experience. Experience comes from bad judgement." - Will Rogers, or maybe Sam Clemens
DW and I - FIREd at 50 (7/06), living off assets
harley is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 01-28-2010, 03:13 PM   #7
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Keim's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Moscow
Posts: 1,128
Quote:
Originally Posted by Walt34 View Post
For myself, I have yet to see anything that tops Pet Rocks for the ultimate in pure marketing.

People paid $5 each for them. I guess it was only those who didn't have enough in their heads already.
I think bottled water tops pet rocks. That and the folks that run successful oxygen bars.
__________________
Keim is offline   Reply With Quote
6 useless products...
Old 01-28-2010, 03:45 PM   #8
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
MasterBlaster's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 4,359
6 useless products...

6. Sree Yantra : What is Sree Yantra? I would let the product’s website describe it.
Shree Yantra or Shri Yantra is a multi purpose Yantra and used for wealth, fame, authority, prosperity and mental peace. Shri Yantra or Shree Yantra remove all the negative vibrations and add positive cosmic energies into our environment. It is beneficial for almost everybody and must be used by everyone. The yantra pick up particular cosmic ray wave emitted by the planets and other universal objects and transform them into constructive vibrations. These are then transmitted to the surroundings where the Shri Yantra is placed, thus destroying all destructive forces within the vicinity.
5. Automated Revolving Ice Cream Cone : Seriously how lazy can someone be? I admit that the present generation is lazy, but lazy enough that they would need an ice-cream cone which revolves by itself?
4. Earthbound Dog Tag : What if you are abducted by aliens and left stranded somewhere else in this mystical galaxy. Will you be able to find your way home?

With the help of Earth bound Dog Tag you will be able to locate and communicate the location of Earth from any location in space.
From the website :
Engraved with several methods of locating Earth in the Galaxy, an alien pilot does not need to understand any human language to use this information. The mathematical location of Earth in relation to several important pulsars is represented by the radial diagram. Earth’s relation to the solar system is shown at the top. Also included is a schematic of Earth itself and it’s major land masses. Two human icons (man and woman) are graphically connected to Earth at points in all three diagrams and are shown with their hands waving as a gesture of goodwill
3. Duster Cat Slippers : I found this at Brandish.Tv’s top five useless inventions list. The product itself is simple enough. A set of dusters that would fit into the cat’s paws and clean up the house while the cat idles around. That sounds innovative and useful, right? Wrong.

From Brandish.Tv :







They idle around your house doing very little except eating. Well, make them earn their grub by getting them to dust when they walk! Obviously you’ll have to ignore the fact that they lick their anus, then inevitable trying and lick their paws, thus spreading cat anus all over your nice new floor boards. Other than that it’s genius.
2. Reserve A Spot In Heaven : I love this product. Because unlike most other products in this list this one doesn’t take itself too seriously.
This product from Edgar Kim and Nathan Davis, claims to reserve a spot for you in heaven, because apparently heaven is running out of space. If you don’t want a future of endless suffering all you have to do is shell out $12.79 for the essential travel kit or $15.95 for the all access travel kit. Quote from the site
It is recommended that you frame your documents. Let people know you’re going up!
Heaven doesn’t suite you? Dont worry, thanks to these guys you can also book your spot in hell at the same rates. And like all good products this one also has a money back guarantee!

1. Japanese Face Slimmer : If you thought the sauna belt was bad (and it is bad, mind you..melting the fat – literally is just not possible), then wait till you have seen what the Japanese have come up with. The face slimmer is a hideous mask that claims to slim down your face using contact pressure and sauna! So. finally we have a product thats capable of burning your skin and crushing your bones together.
(Bonus) Back Scratcher’s T-Shirt : This is not a real product but just a concept from the Chindogu society.
From the website :
The friend (or partner) who offers to scratch your back is a friend (or partner) indeed. Except it all goes horribly wrong when they just can’t seem to locate the maddening itch. For those who are fed up of saying, ‘left a bit… up a bit… right a bit… damn!’ comes a very special T-shirt, complete with Battleships style, itch-locater grid. The scratchee is also equipped with a hand-held miniature corresponding grid-map, for accurate communication. So when the scratcher says, ‘I’m scratching F5, ‘ the scratchee can say, ‘try G7′.
__________________
MasterBlaster is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-28-2010, 09:59 PM   #9
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
BigMoneyJim's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: DFW
Posts: 2,627
For people who can't cup their hands?

Jolly Time | Popcorn Ball Maker



And if you're reserving space in heaven, be sure you have considered your pet's post-rapture care:
Quote:
For $110.00 we will guarantee that should the Rapture occur within ten (10) years of receipt of payment, one pet per residence will be saved. Each additional pet at your residence will be saved for an additional $15.00 fee.
http://eternal-earthbound-pets.com/

From their FAQ:
Quote:
Q: How do you ensure your representatives won't be Raptured.
A: Actually, we don't ensure it, they do. Each of our representatives has stated to us in writing that they are atheists, do not believe in God / Jesus, and that they have blasphemed in accordance with
Mark 3:29, negating any chance of salvation.
__________________
BigMoneyJim is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-28-2010, 10:23 PM   #10
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 1,015
Along with Pet Rocks, I nominate the International Star Registry, where for just $54 you can name a star after someone. Huh?
__________________
Achiever51 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-28-2010, 10:32 PM   #11
Administrator
W2R's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: New Orleans
Posts: 38,905
Quote:
Originally Posted by Achiever51 View Post
Along with Pet Rocks, I nominate the International Star Registry, where for just $54 you can name a star after someone. Huh?
Hey, that's really, really romantic! If I were only 17 again, and if my steady date had a star named after me, I'd be in heaven. We could lie out on the grass on a dark night with binoculars and look for it, together.

(After that, the submarine races in the lake...)
__________________
Already we are boldly launched upon the deep; but soon we shall be lost in its unshored, harbourless immensities.

- - H. Melville, 1851
W2R is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 01-28-2010, 10:32 PM   #12
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
bbbamI's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Dallas 'burb
Posts: 9,039
Quote:
Originally Posted by BigMoneyJim View Post
For people who can't cup their hands?

Jolly Time | Popcorn Ball Maker


__________________
There's no need to complicate, our time is short..
bbbamI is offline   Reply With Quote
Juicer
Old 01-28-2010, 10:38 PM   #13
Recycles dryer sheets
 
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 189
Juicer

Though one gets fresh juice but cleaning afterwords is a big pain.
__________________
landover is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-28-2010, 11:09 PM   #14
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
harley's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Following the nice weather
Posts: 6,430
Man, compared to the things y'all found, that hot dog toaster looks like an absolute necessity.
__________________
"Good judgment comes from experience. Experience comes from bad judgement." - Will Rogers, or maybe Sam Clemens
DW and I - FIREd at 50 (7/06), living off assets
harley is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 01-28-2010, 11:49 PM   #15
Moderator Emeritus
Bestwifeever's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 16,375
I have one of these in my kitchen and DH and I are trying to remember the last time we used it:
Attached Images
File Type: jpg oven.jpg (32.9 KB, 122 views)
__________________
“Would you like an adventure now, or would you like to have your tea first?” J.M. Barrie, Peter Pan
Bestwifeever is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-29-2010, 07:48 AM   #16
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
travelover's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 9,894
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bestwifeever View Post
I have one of these in my kitchen and DH and I are trying to remember the last time we used it:
The cabinet in the middle and the bottom drawer are handy for storing things, but the top tends to collect clutter.
__________________
Yes, I have achieved work / life balance.
travelover is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 01-29-2010, 08:43 AM   #17
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
FinanceDude's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 12,484
Quote:
Originally Posted by W2R View Post
(After that, the submarine races in the lake...)
__________________
Consult with your own advisor or representative. My thoughts should not be construed as investment advice. Past performance is no guarantee of future results (love that one).......:)


This Thread is USELESS without pics.........:)
FinanceDude is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-29-2010, 08:45 AM   #18
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 7,530
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bestwifeever View Post
I have one of these in my kitchen and DH and I are trying to remember the last time we used it:
That's a children's toy. My daughters have one in pink and they pretend to doing this thing called "cooking" wherein they put imaginary stuff in the pink machine, then extract a finished product that is appetizing. And imaginary.
__________________
Retired in 2013 at age 33. Keeping busy reading, blogging, relaxing, gaming, and enjoying the outdoors with my wife and 3 kids (5, 11, and 12).
FUEGO is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-29-2010, 08:51 AM   #19
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 7,530
Quote:
Originally Posted by BigMoneyJim View Post
And if you're reserving space in heaven, be sure you have considered your pet's post-rapture care:


Home Page

From their FAQ:

Q: How do you ensure your representatives won't be Raptured.
A: Actually, we don't ensure it, they do. Each of our representatives has stated to us in writing that they are atheists, do not believe in God / Jesus, and that they have blasphemed in accordance with
Mark 3:29, negating any chance of salvation.
Man, this could be a niche market in a growth industry that I could really capitalize on. I wonder if they would take me on as a pet caretaker, and what slice of the fee I would get.
__________________
Retired in 2013 at age 33. Keeping busy reading, blogging, relaxing, gaming, and enjoying the outdoors with my wife and 3 kids (5, 11, and 12).
FUEGO is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-29-2010, 11:33 AM   #20
Moderator
ziggy29's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Texas
Posts: 15,612
The "ease" of cracking eggs in this thing is more than offset by the additional hassle of having another utensil to clean when you're done using it.
__________________

__________________
"Hey, for every ten dollars, that's another hour that I have to be in the work place. That's an hour of my life. And my life is a very finite thing. I have only 'x' number of hours left before I'm dead. So how do I want to use these hours of my life? Do I want to use them just spending it on more crap and more stuff, or do I want to start getting a handle on it and using my life more intelligently?" -- Joe Dominguez (1938 - 1997)

RIP to Reemy, my avatar dog (2003 - 9/16/2017)
ziggy29 is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Shake that booty, lose that weight Bestwifeever Health and Early Retirement 8 04-21-2009 08:56 AM
useless body parts lazygood4nothinbum Health and Early Retirement 12 04-30-2008 03:26 PM
Useless stress for Buffett retire@40 Other topics 5 03-29-2005 08:36 AM

 

 
All times are GMT -6. The time now is 05:52 PM.
 
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.