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Wedding gift
Old 04-22-2009, 03:53 PM   #1
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Wedding gift

I'm going to Long Island ,New York for an elaborate wedding . It is my niece so I want to give a nice gift (money ) without breaking the bank . Does anyone know what the going rate is for monetary gifts in New York ? I'm thinking $250 to $300 . Is that low ? I have not been to a wedding in Long Island for years so I need help .This is the typical elaborate cocktail hour followed by sit down dinner with an impressive menu , open bar ,etc..
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Old 04-22-2009, 03:59 PM   #2
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I think anyone should be happy with that amount...after all, it's a gift.....
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Old 04-22-2009, 06:39 PM   #3
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Do you adopt? My wedding planned for 2013 is not that far away...

I have no idea what the "correct" amount is anymore. Whatever you decide on is fine.

Update: Ooo, ooo, look what I found for you.
http://www.diamondring.com/forums/sh...ad.php?t=45826
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Old 04-22-2009, 06:57 PM   #4
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Originally Posted by freebird5825 View Post
Do you adopt? My wedding planned for 2013 is not that far away...

I have no idea what the "correct" amount is anymore. Whatever you decide on is fine.

Update: Ooo, ooo, look what I found for you.
Cash wedding gifts

Thanks freebird that is just the info. I needed.
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Old 04-22-2009, 07:04 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Moemg View Post
I'm going to Long Island ,New York for an elaborate wedding . It is my niece so I want to give a nice gift (money ) without breaking the bank . Does anyone know what the going rate is for monetary gifts in New York ? I'm thinking $250 to $300 . Is that low ? I have not been to a wedding in Long Island for years so I need help .This is the typical elaborate cocktail hour followed by sit down dinner with an impressive menu , open bar ,etc..
Shouldn't the amount expected be printed on the invitation?
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Old 04-22-2009, 07:23 PM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Moemg View Post
I'm going to Long Island ,New York for an elaborate wedding . It is my niece so I want to give a nice gift (money ) without breaking the bank . Does anyone know what the going rate is for monetary gifts in New York ? I'm thinking $250 to $300 . Is that low ? I have not been to a wedding in Long Island for years so I need help .This is the typical elaborate cocktail hour followed by sit down dinner with an impressive menu , open bar ,etc..
Sounds right. Unless they're getting married in Manhattan, helicoptering the guests out to the Gold Coast, and having Aerosmith play at the reception, then you'll be warmly remembered as the generous auntie...

If they're getting married on the beach followed by a BBQ, and socks are considered optional attire, then you'll be remembered as the most extremely generous auntie.

We were invited to a wedding like that followed by a reception at Pebble Beach's clubhouse. Over 20 years later it still comes up in shipmate reminisces. But despite all the drama surrounding the ceremony & celebration, the couple remains happily married.
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Old 04-22-2009, 07:25 PM   #7
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Shouldn't the amount expected be printed on the invitation?

No ,that would be tacky . Not that expecting people to give lavish wedding gifts isn't tacky .
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Old 04-22-2009, 07:28 PM   #8
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Sounds right. Unless they're getting married in Manhattan, helicoptering the guests out to the Gold Coast, and having Aerosmith play at the reception, then you'll be warmly remembered as the generous auntie...

If Aerosmith shows up I'm upping the present to $350..
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Old 04-22-2009, 08:08 PM   #9
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No ,that would be tacky . Not that expecting people to give lavish wedding gifts isn't tacky .
I'm one of those folks who doesn't 'get' social cues; just tell me what you want, and we can negotiate.
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Old 04-22-2009, 08:15 PM   #10
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Sounds like a very nice gift to me, Moe. Your niece will surely appreciate it.

And that Steven Tyler guy too
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Old 04-22-2009, 08:59 PM   #11
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Sounds like a very nice gift to me, Moe. Your niece will surely appreciate it.

And that Steven Tyler guy too

Do you think it would be inappropriate to ask for his autograph while he's playing the chicken dance ?
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Old 04-22-2009, 09:07 PM   #12
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Do you adopt? My wedding planned for 2013 is not that far away...


I do not adopt but I usually give generous presents and I know all the wedding dances ( Chicken dance , Macarena , line dancing ,even a polka if necessary )
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Old 04-22-2009, 10:02 PM   #13
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Here is a site that states what they think should be given at a wedding in NYC (granted, from 2004):


how much $$$ do you give/gifts? - Wedding Forum - GardenWeb

I would have said $100, but isn't the old rule of thumb that you give the same amount that the wedding party paid for your participation. $75 spent for your dinner and entertainment, then you give $75. $125 then give $125. I always understood this is the correct way to do it.
HOWEVER, this is your niece, and I think you should give whatever your heart and head dictate. I think all rules are off when it comes to family relationships. On the other hand, if you don't really like this niece then...well, you know.
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Old 04-23-2009, 07:14 AM   #14
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I do not adopt but I usually give generous presents and I know all the wedding dances ( Chicken dance , Macarena , line dancing ,even a polka if necessary )
Good comeback.

Glad that forum was helpful. It was exactly the topic you were inquiring about. Some of those posts were hysterical.
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Old 04-23-2009, 10:50 AM   #15
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Here is a site that states what they think should be given at a wedding in NYC (granted, from 2004):


how much $$$ do you give/gifts? - Wedding Forum - GardenWeb

I would have said $100, but isn't the old rule of thumb that you give the same amount that the wedding party paid for your participation. $75 spent for your dinner and entertainment, then you give $75. $125 then give $125. I always understood this is the correct way to do it.
HOWEVER, this is your niece, and I think you should give whatever your heart and head dictate. I think all rules are off when it comes to family relationships. On the other hand, if you don't really like this niece then...well, you know.



Thanks , It truly is a regional thing . In Florida and upstate New York the shower gifts and wedding presents are smaller . In Northern new Jersey and New York it's on the high end , I've decided to go with $250 since they are late 30"s and they both are lawyers .
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Old 04-23-2009, 04:21 PM   #16
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I guess then if it is regional I quoted the rules in Chicago.
Yeah, I'd be really generous with a beloved niece, too, Moemg. Hang the rules.
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