Wedding Present

[Moemg]

I am invited to my cousin's wedding . I will be unable to attend but I want to send a present .It's the first wedding for him and second for the bride . They are early forties . They both have good jobs and their apartment is fully furnished and equipped . What would be a nice gift ? The wedding is in Pennsylvania . I considered cash but how much and would this be insulting ?

 

[bbbamI]

My suggestion is a wicker basket full of various coffees and chocolate.

 

[Meadbh]

They may appreciate experiences more than material goods. Cash is always welcome but will not generate any excitement if they are already flush. If they live in Philadelphia or Pittsburgh, depending on their interests, seasons tickets to the orchestra or to a big league sports event might be an interesting option. I did the orchestra thing with my cousin and her husband for a significant anniversary and they loved it.

 

[Bestwifeever]

I'd probably stick a check for $50 to $100, since you're not going to the wedding, in a nice card.

 

[MichaelB]

A call to the mother of the bride or groom might help.

 

[Moemg]

They may appreciate experiences more than material goods. Cash is always welcome but will not generate any excitement if they are already flush. If they live in Philadelphia or Pittsburgh, depending on their interests, seasons tickets to the orchestra or to a big league sports event might be an interesting option. I did the orchestra thing with my cousin and her husband for a significant anniversary and they loved it.

I like this idea but unfortunately my cousin already gets free tickets to a lot of events .

 

[Moemg]

My suggestion is a wicker basket full of various coffees and chocolate.

A food present is a good idea . Thanks !

 

[sunnysideup]

When I remarried in my 40s, a friend who knew we enjoy wine gave us several very nice bottles of wine. I think if you know the couple and what they like to do you can come up with a gift or gift certificate they will enjoy.

Regarding money as a suitable gift, this is a regional thing I believe. In northern NJ, it is the most common gift, and it typically is a large amount . HOwever, in many other areas wrapped gifts are still the norm, and the amount spent on the gifts is not as outrageous...

 

[Moemg]

Regarding money as a suitable gift, this is a regional thing I believe. In northern NJ, it is the most common gift, and it typically is a large amount . HOwever, in many other areas wrapped gifts are still the norm, and the amount spent on the gifts is not as outrageous...

I spent many years in Northern N.J. where not only were the wedding gifts huge the shower gifts were also . After moving to Florida I was invited to a wedding shower and I brought a typical New Jersey gift . Most expensive gift at that shower . It was a learning experience .

 

[haha]

Regarding money as a suitable gift, this is a regional thing I believe. In northern NJ, it is the most common gift, and it typically is a large amount . .

How much would one of these typical large cash gifts be?

Ha

 

[sheehs1]

Do they have a photographer that will photograph the wedding? Most professional photographers publish the pictures on pictage.com these days and purchase is via internet. Perhaps the photographer will know a way around that.

My daughter was married May 19th and am currently ordering pictures off pictage.com...and they are not cheap that is for sure.

Did the bride register anywhere? Williams Sonoma, Pottery Barn, Macys? If so, she will have selected things she would like to receive. A quick phone call to them can answer that question.

 

[rodi]

I lived in suburban Philly when I got married at age 38, DH was just shy of 47. First marriage for both of us.
Since we were both homeowners when we met more "stuff" was not appreciated.

Cash definitely got put to good use.

We also enjoyed gifts that spoke to some of our interests... a gift certificate to a luggage shop (we like to travel), a gift certificate to a local/family run hardware store (we were fixing up my 100 year old home.) Boating and fishing supplies (dh had a boat back then.)

Less exciting were the cliches - silver picture frames, expensive crystal vases, etc.

If you know they have common interests - gift them something that is inspired by that interest. They do not need household stuff at that age.

 

[Moemg]

How much would one of these typical large cash gifts be?

Ha

Usually $300 and up . I have attended wedding showers were the bride to be received thousands of dollars worth of fine china and if your family is connected to the mob the presents are massive as are the weddings . I only attended one mob related wedding and it was straight out of "The Soprano's ". After they served dessert the one wall opened up and revealed a room with tables laden with more desserts and after dinner drinks .

 

[Moemg]

Did the bride register anywhere? Williams Sonoma, Pottery Barn, Macys? If so, she will have selected things she would like to receive. A quick phone call to them can answer that question.

No , they did not register any where and I called my Aunt to ask her and she does not have a clue what they want besides cash.

 

[Marita40]

I gave a recently married couple a gift certificate to a local restaurant--one that didn't expire so they could use it whenever they wanted for a cozy meal for two. You could research online some restaurants they might like and do the same.

 

[Nords]

I am invited to my cousin's wedding . I will be unable to attend but I want to send a present .It's the first wedding for him and second for the bride . They are early forties . They both have good jobs and their apartment is fully furnished and equipped . What would be a nice gift ? The wedding is in Pennsylvania . I considered cash but how much and would this be insulting ?

No , they did not register any where and I called my Aunt to ask her and she does not have a clue what they want besides cash.

We've hired wedding planners for friends like these, because they should know enough about weddings to register somewhere for something.

Are they moving to a new home after the wedding? In that case I'd send a gift card to Home Depot or Bed Bath & Beyond...

 

[Moemg]

Are they moving to a new home after the wedding? In that case I'd send a gift card to Home Depot or Bed Bath & Beyond...

Thanks Nords , Tomorrow I am going to buy a gift card for Bed , Bath & Beyond or Pier One .

 

[haha]

Usually $300 and up . I have attended wedding showers were the bride to be received thousands of dollars worth of fine china and if your family is connected to the mob the presents are massive as are the weddings . I only attended one mob related wedding and it was straight out of "The Soprano's ". After they served dessert the one wall opened up and revealed a room with tables laden with more desserts and after dinner drinks .

Wow. I think I would give a nice check too if it was a mob wedding.

Ha

 

[Moemg]

Wow. I think I would give a nice check too if it was a mob wedding.

Ha

and it better not bounce !

 

[sunnysideup]

Wow. I think I would give a nice check too if it was a mob wedding.

Ha

Well, $250-300 is not abnormal for what we would give as a couple to a non-mob wedding!!!! If they were close friends or family, we would up it a bit.

I don't know how young kids afford being in the wedding party!!

 

[Moemg]

Well, $250-300 is not abnormal for what we would give as a couple to a non-mob wedding!!!! If they were close friends or family, we would up it a bit.

I don't know how young kids afford being in the wedding party!!

Absolutely , I give $250 to $300 for regular weddings in the Northeast for mob weddings you better pony up a lot more and be happy about it .

 

[Amethyst]

Odd. I grew up in Northern NJ, and many relatives still reside there. Father's ancestors were in NJ from the late 19th century (emigrated to Manhattan, moved across the river to Little Germany). Never have I heard of lavish gifts being the norm - and $$ would be considered gauche, except for young newlyweds who have nothing and need everything. I must ask my cousin in Hoboken about this "custom."

Amethyst

I spent many years in Northern N.J. where not only were the wedding gifts huge the shower gifts were also . After moving to Florida I was invited to a wedding shower and I brought a typical New Jersey gift . Most expensive gift at that shower . It was a learning experience .

 

[Bestwifeever]

A lot of people I know whose are third generation Chicagoans give a check that "covers the plate"--the cost of the reception per person. Someone even asked me what the cost of our daughter's reception was so they could give us the appropriate amount!

You better believe we covered the plate for her daughter's wedding.

But for a wedding you're not going to attend, like Moe's, you're off the hook for the full plate amount. You can just cover an appetizer plate in that case.

 

[Nords]

You better believe we covered the plate for her daughter's wedding.

I think in that situation you're obligated to cover a couple of tables!