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Old 01-29-2014, 02:25 PM   #21
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My wife worked for a university as a sexual harassment and diversity investigator. She has hours of stories. At one point she was called in to investigate a group of custodians. During lunch they would all go into a dark room and grope one another. One of them finally complained, when she realized she wasn't getting groped as much as the others.

Her many stories really put my story about the time my boss requested I send him a report on when I would finish my reports to shame.
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Old 01-29-2014, 02:25 PM   #22
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I was working for an air express delivery company supporting staff at airports where we had delivery facilities. It was early days and we had recently phased in an online system using dumb terminals and CICS transaction processing. We get a call one day from one of the station managers complaining that the package tracking system had simply stopped working. After going through the diagnostics to figure out why the terminal was not displaying the information, it occurred to me that it might something as simple as a loose plug (remember I was new), so I asked the guy to look behind the desks and see if the terminal was securely plugged into the wall socket. He was back on the phone telling me he could not verify it was plugged in because it was too dark. The power had failed.
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Old 01-29-2014, 04:11 PM   #23
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At my first job I was washing my hands in the restroom when I heard someone flush one of the toilets; the next thing I knew there was a loud bang and chunks of toilet started sliding across the floor. I have no idea what caused it but the toilet bowl exploded when flushed. Fortunately the guy in the stall got away with only a couple of cuts on his ankles.
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Old 01-29-2014, 04:34 PM   #24
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I've been on the scene twice in my life when a man accidentally walked into a ladies' rest room. Both times, the women emitted loud chicken squawks, that went on after the errant fellow departed Then I, myself, walked into a public bathroom, noticed the "funny sinks" along the wall (but no sink users, fortunately) and got out quickly. What I've always wondered is, what kinds of noises would the men have emitted if they'd noticed me?

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I was traveling to a client site with a goof ball. We went to this Megacorp every month, so we were familiar with the office layout. He comes back from the men's room in a panic. Tells me he went in, noticed there are no urinals. As he's in the stall he noticed a place to dispose his feminine hygiene products. He figured he's in the wrong restroom, is panicking over what to do. He managed to get out without being noticed.

We go back to the scene of the crime, this Megacorp had switched the designation of Mens vs. Womans restroom since the last time we were there. That crisis was averted.
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Old 01-29-2014, 04:43 PM   #25
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I've been on the scene twice in my life when a man accidentally walked into a ladies' rest room. Both times, the women emitted loud chicken squawks, that went on after the errant fellow departed Then I, myself, walked into a public bathroom, noticed the "funny sinks" along the wall (but no sink users, fortunately) and got out quickly. What I've always wondered is, what kinds of noises would the men have emitted if they'd noticed me?

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Men would be perfectly silent.....
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Old 01-29-2014, 04:59 PM   #26
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Working late there was always the possibility the cleaning crew, all women, would walk in the mens bathroom while in use. All they did was check to see if any stall was in use, in which case they stepped out and waited. A urinal being used wasn't enough to stop them, they'd just start their cleaning chores on the other side. Never bothered me, I don't recall anyone complaining.
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Old 01-29-2014, 05:18 PM   #27
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My wife worked for a university as a sexual harassment and diversity investigator. She has hours of stories. At one point she was called in to investigate a group of custodians. During lunch they would all go into a dark room and grope one another. One of them finally complained, when she realized she wasn't getting groped as much as the others. Her many stories really put my story about the time my boss requested I send him a report on when I would finish my reports to shame.
I think I would be upset and have my feelings hurt too, if I was invited to participate with 3 other women in a closet and then suddenly be reduced to spectator status.
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Old 01-29-2014, 05:44 PM   #28
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I have a coworker who very rarely wears any clothes to work, but I work at home with my partner, so maybe that's not so weird.
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Old 01-29-2014, 06:11 PM   #29
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I was working a web support gig on the phones. Well really for this line I was 1 of 2 part time agents. I received a call from a gal in our Customer Service department... she had an issue with her PC. Let me clarify, the line she dialed (my line on web support) had nothing to do with our internal tech support department she should have phoned.

I first asked her why she phoned me and she said she knew I was sharp. I asked her to confirm she stated her monitor all of a sudden went black.

I hung up the phone and just walked over to her desk. I saw she was in her socks with her feet up... I looked down and sure as $hit she had kicked her shoes off down onto her power-strip.

I told her to relocate the strip, and keep her shoes on. Problem solved.

I realize now why she dialed web support instead of our internal help-desk and took the liberty of reporting her issue to them anyways. Internal Helpdesk let me know unfortunately this wasn't her first time with a blank monitor problem.
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Old 01-29-2014, 06:18 PM   #30
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In the very late 1990's/early 2000's when digital photography was only just beginning to get popular, I had a digital compact - and was one of the few people at work who had one of these cool new-fangled gadgets. I spent quite a bit of time running around taking pictures of my co-workers. We were all enjoying the novelty of this little camera.

One day, I was sitting in the little boys' room, "taking care of business". To while away the time, I pulled out my digital camera and started reviewing the photos I'd been taking on the little screen on the back. For some reason, I had forgotten to lock the door, and one of my co-workers barged in as I was peering at the photos on my camera.

We've all been there and either accidentally walked in on someone in the restroom, or been walked in on. This was a bit more embarrassing though, as it suddenly occurred to me that to him, it must have looked as if I was sitting there taking pictures of my John Thomas. He said something apologetic, left quickly, and I jumped up to lock the door. I did briefly consider going up to him later and saying something along the lines of, "That wasn't what it looked like, I was just reviewing the pictures I had already taken" but then the immediate reply would have been, "Yeah, riiiiiiight............".

Aaah well, what can you do
Nah, that's nothing to be embarrassed about. How about that congressman (whom I shall not name) who not only took nude pictures of himself, but also sent to others and got caught. Then, he did it again and got caught again. He didn't look apologetic nor embarrassed on TV, the first nor 2nd time he was apologizing to public. Some have real thick skin.
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Old 01-29-2014, 06:21 PM   #31
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Another good one, was working construction. A crewmember was hogging the Portable bathroom quite a bit one particular day. Another crewmember gave him the shakes by rocking the portable back and forth while he was in there taking care of business...

He came out mad and a pursuit ensued. The next thing I know I see a blue-chalk line go airborne and hits this fellar square in the mop. The irony in it is this guy had been growing his hair out all summer which only added to the hilarity.

He had to frame up the house with blue hair the rest of the day...and he still continued to have stomach problems.
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Old 01-29-2014, 08:47 PM   #32
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I think I would be upset and have my feelings hurt too, if I was invited to participate with 3 other women in a closet and then suddenly be reduced to spectator status.
If that ever happens, just let me know. I'd be willing to take your place so you wouldn't have to suffer through such an ordeal....
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Old 01-30-2014, 08:15 AM   #33
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I worked in vehicle development at MegaMotors, which meant spending a lot of time in Florida during the winter. One co-worker, upon his untimely death, was discovered to have an entire separate family down there complete with house, wife and kids. I guess he was a Charles Kuralt wannabee.
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Old 01-30-2014, 09:21 AM   #34
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When my beloved mega corp merged with another mega corp in a so called "merger of equals" (it was actually a take over with our chairman selling us down the river for his own personal gain), things began to change at our former HQ location with over 2000 employees. They put signs on the rest rooms, saying to please only flush for No 2. Maybe this was their way of saying, get out, we do not value employees from your side of the merger.

Nevertheless, that little fiasco lasted a few days, and the signs were taken down, but the message sent was just the beginning of the demise of an otherwise wonderful workplace.
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Old 01-30-2014, 10:19 AM   #35
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When you were/are in the trenches at work, have you seen some weird ass ****? Especially if it was funny, tell us about it.
Not really. But then, after a while everything that went on seemed pretty normal, whether it would seem that way to outsiders or not.

There WAS the time when I was working late on a Friday night, and our extremely nutso (certified insane, wildly unpredictable, given hiring preference due to being mentally disabled/insane) administrative assistant very seriously threatened me with a gun for no reason other than that she had somehow got one past security and into the building. Nobody else was around. Scared me silly.

After I extracted myself from that situation I wrote up a summary of what had transpired, and including my demands for a safe workplace, and sent it to everyone clear up to G*d. Middle management was ecstatic since they were already trying to get rid of her. Last I heard she was working at K-Mart.

This sort of occurrence really isn't all that weird any more these days, sadly enough. And it sure wasn't funny.
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Old 01-30-2014, 12:35 PM   #36
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The weirdest thing I can remember from my working days occurred when my company relocated into #7 World Trade Center in 1991 (we moved out of there in early 2001, 4 months before the 9/11 attacks).

The original building was shaped like a trapezoid, so those of us like me who had cubicles near the corners had some odd shapes, especially if we had main support beams near the backs of them. I had a nice cubicle because of this and it included a small gap behind one of the partitions for me to put up a coat hanger and hang up a large coat if I needed to, and it was out of view from outsiders.

One day, it was one of the first days we were in our new location, one of the company bigwigs was walking around the floor to take a look at how we were settling in. Mr. Bigwig happened to see the arm of my overcoat sticking out a little bit from behind that makeshift set up I had put together. He became upset at this awful "display" of my coat's sleeve from behind my cubicle and ordered me to hang my coat in the coat closet down the hall in a common area (a pantry). Stunned at this level of micro-managment, I moved the coat but the next day I returned it to its more convenient location. In the next 10 years, I never hung it in the pantry's closet again and he never came around again.

This same Mr. Coats Police Bigwig also became upset that some of the venetian blinds were not being set at the same level at consecutive windows on another floor, so he ordered that they be made even. A coworker I knew who worked near there evened them out for one day, then set every one of them at different levels (like an ascending staircase) the next day, hoing Mr. (Coats and) Blinds Police Bigwig would return and see it. He never did, unfortunately.

You would think Mr. Bigwig would have better things to do than watch how venetial blnds and my overcoat are hung!
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Old 01-30-2014, 01:01 PM   #37
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The weirdest thing I can remember from my working days occurred when my company relocated into #7 World Trade Center in 1991 (we moved out of there in early 2001, 4 months before the 9/11 attacks).

The original building was shaped like a trapezoid, so those of us like me who had cubicles near the corners had some odd shapes, especially if we had main support beams near the backs of them. I had a nice cubicle because of this and it included a small gap behind one of the partitions for me to put up a coat hanger and hang up a large coat if I needed to, and it was out of view from outsiders.

One day, it was one of the first days we were in our new location, one of the company bigwigs was walking around the floor to take a look at how we were settling in. Mr. Bigwig happened to see the arm of my overcoat sticking out a little bit from behind that makeshift set up I had put together. He became upset at this awful "display" of my coat's sleeve from behind my cubicle and ordered me to hang my coat in the coat closet down the hall in a common area (a pantry). Stunned at this level of micro-managment, I moved the coat but the next day I returned it to its more convenient location. In the next 10 years, I never hung it in the pantry's closet again and he never came around again.

This same Mr. Coats Police Bigwig also became upset that some of the venetian blinds were not being set at the same level at consecutive windows on another floor, so he ordered that they be made even. A coworker I knew who worked near there evened them out for one day, then set every one of them at different levels (like an ascending staircase) the next day, hoing Mr. (Coats and) Blinds Police Bigwig would return and see it. He never did, unfortunately.

You would think Mr. Bigwig would have better things to do than watch how venetial blnds and my overcoat are hung!
Oh the blinds OMG. Megacorp had designers deceide the proper angle, washers were installed to prevent movment outside the acceptable range. Great except for about 3 hours a day, I couldn't see my terminal.

I was supporting Megacorps CICS regions at that time, outages were about $10k per minute. Well somebody installed something that was walking over storage, causing the onlines to randomly fall down.

The CIOs office was on my floor, he stopped by to see how I was doing. I pointed to my unusable terminal, explained I'd be working on the issue in a few hours due to the blind situation. He politely thanked me, walked off. I heard his voice bellowing on the phone, about 10 minutes later there were 3 nervous maintenance guys removing washers from blinds.
Thanks for that memory,
MRG
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Old 01-30-2014, 01:11 PM   #38
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My last few years of work I was constantly having hot flashes and kept an old circular government issued fan close to my chair. One day I smelled something burning and called the service people to check out the smell that was getting worse by the minute. They came and checked out outlets, up in the ceiling...trying to find the source. My FAN... Sometimes I would have it set on high, then low again according to heat tolerance. I had had it on high and the plastic bag from the waste basket flew out and into the fan...stopping the blades...the motor was a just A LITTLE HOT! That was a good fan, I had to say goodbye to it when I retired.
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Old 01-30-2014, 01:21 PM   #39
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May not qualify as a story, but...

I graduated from a Big 10 school up north, but my first job was in a very small town in Texas. On my first day at work, while touring the lab associated with our process & quality engineering group, I noticed a sign on the wall that said simply:

We don't really care how you did it up North.

Sorta set the stage for me right away. Turned out I fit in well and thoroughly enjoyed that first assignment...thank goodness.
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Old 01-30-2014, 02:38 PM   #40
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This same Mr. Coats Police Bigwig also became upset that some of the venetian blinds were not being set at the same level at consecutive windows on another floor, so he ordered that they be made even.
I had an administrator who got upset once about the same thing. All the blinds had to be at the same level even though harsh sunlight came through some windows whiles others were just outside the sun's rays.

Years ago at MegaCorp we moved into new offices and the first rule was no photos in the cubicles except for those of the immediate family. We had a Mexican-American fellow working there who put up a photo of what can only be described as Hollywood's image of a Latino gang - switchblade knives, chains, bandanas, gang symbols, nasty tattos, etc. He was never questioned about it. Another guy had a photo of his wife (maybe? maybe not?) in a dress slit up to here and cut down to there.
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