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When work really does stink
Old 12-22-2012, 09:43 AM   #1
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When work really does stink

Not that we need another reason to retire early, but this redefines the "unpleasant workplace".

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DECEMBER 21--A federal employee was formally reprimanded this month for excessive workplace flatulence, a sanction that was delivered to him in a five-page letter that actually included a log of representative dates and times when he was recorded “releasing the awful and unpleasant odor” in his Baltimore office.
Formal Reprimand Issued To Flatulent Federal Worker | The Smoking Gun

Counting and recording individual instances of passing gas? That would make for interesting "what did you do at work today, dear" conversation at the dinner table.
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Old 12-22-2012, 10:23 AM   #2
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So, if it continues and they want him gone, does he qualify for a disability retirement?
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Old 12-22-2012, 10:32 AM   #3
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Many years ago I had the misfortune of working with a guy like this. He gained a behind-the-back nickname in the office, along the lines of a famous boxer: Gaseous Clay...
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Old 12-22-2012, 10:35 AM   #4
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I've been riding bikes on our city's paths. They are restoring the sewers that run under this easement by "jack slipping" new liners in them, which means they are working them while they are live and running. I see the workers out there literally working in the cr*p. The smell is horrendous.

This reminds me to be very thankful for what I have.

Oh, and I had a flatulent co-worker once. He did it on purpose because we were sharing and office, and he knew if I complained, he might go back to a one-person office. It worked.
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Old 12-22-2012, 11:15 AM   #5
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I'm seeing hope for an early out package after all. Bring on the high fiber diet!
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Old 12-22-2012, 11:24 AM   #6
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He must of been a big hit on the elevators
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Old 12-22-2012, 11:39 AM   #7
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I had to deal with an (50+ yo male, never married, obese, generally belligerent, probably never dated anyone) employee who seemed to wear the same clothes without laundering them for weeks or month (who knows). Lots of co-workers complained, and I got him to clean up his act several times, but he eventually fell back into his old smelly habits over and over.

One of many things I miss about working & esp being the boss...
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Old 12-22-2012, 12:08 PM   #8
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Maybe it's his way of getting a desk next to an open window.
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Old 12-22-2012, 12:12 PM   #9
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Quote:
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So, if it continues and they want him gone, does he qualify for a disability retirement?
No way. This would make him totally eligible for sewer work. See JoeWras' post.
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Old 12-22-2012, 12:17 PM   #10
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So, if it continues and they want him gone, does he qualify for a disability retirement?
If they succeed and he does go, does that mean he'll be gone with the wind?
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Old 12-22-2012, 08:44 PM   #11
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If they succeed and he does go, does that mean he'll be gone with the wind?

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Old 12-22-2012, 09:19 PM   #12
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Speaking of bad odors at work....I once had a secretary who would eat smelts at her desk. The stench of those things about mid-afternoon could gag a maggot.
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Old 12-22-2012, 09:58 PM   #13
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This is why I'm glad I have a nice large office with multiple large windows that open wide and my office is on the top floor of the building where I get a nice breeze going. Nobody ever smells a thing...

I love eating beans, tacos, curry, thai cuisine, and durian for lunch. Not always on the same day though. I like to mix it up a bit - keep it fresh you know.
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Old 12-22-2012, 10:25 PM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MichaelB View Post
Formal Reprimand Issued To Flatulent Federal Worker | The Smoking Gun
Counting and recording individual instances of passing gas?
Quote:
Originally Posted by JoeWras View Post
They are restoring the sewers that run under this easement by "jack slipping" new liners in them, which means they are working them while they are live and running. I see the workers out there literally working in the cr*p. The smell is horrendous.
Oh, and I had a flatulent co-worker once. He did it on purpose because we were sharing and office, and he knew if I complained, he might go back to a one-person office. It worked.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Midpack View Post
I had to deal with an (50+ yo male, never married, obese, generally belligerent, probably never dated anyone) employee who seemed to wear the same clothes without laundering them for weeks or month (who knows). Lots of co-workers complained, and I got him to clean up his act several times, but he eventually fell back into his old smelly habits over and over.
One of many things I miss about working & esp being the boss...
These guys would all feel right at home in the submarine force!
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Old 12-23-2012, 10:24 AM   #15
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Quote:
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Speaking of bad odors at work....I once had a secretary who would eat smelts at her desk. The stench of those things about mid-afternoon could gag a maggot.
We had a Cust Serv Rep who believed in garlic tabs (for what I don't know), and the paradigm 'if a little is good, a lot must be better.' I don't know how many she took per day, but she always smelled like garlic. Not as bad as gas or BO, but the rest of us kept our distance from her and her perpetual garlic smell...
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Old 12-24-2012, 06:42 AM   #16
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Counting and recording individual instances of passing gas? That would make for interesting "what did you do at work today, dear" conversation at the dinner table.
Anyone who has worked for government would understand. If it isn't documented in excruciating detail, it didn't happen.
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Old 12-31-2012, 11:53 AM   #17
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Doesn't the Americans With Disabilities Act address this? All kidding aside, threats to one's employment from management should be taken seriously.
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Old 01-08-2013, 04:17 PM   #18
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In the 80's I w*rked in the corporate headquarters of a convenience store chain whose name consisted mostly of numbers. We were in offices enclosed by a modular wall system that had two rows of small holes that ran from floor to ceiling every four feet of wall -- two people to an office.

The person next door to two of my cow*rkers actually filed a complaint with HR that gasses "apparently" of a flatulent nature were regularly penetrating the wall between her and the cow*rkers. The boss had to call them into his office and counsel them on the incident, complete with HR paperwork. They told me he could hardly keep a straight face during the meeting, but did his best. I wondered what they thought in HR.
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Old 01-08-2013, 05:08 PM   #19
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omg - this reminds me of a fart-gate incident where i used to w*rk. one of my cow*rkers, larry, was getting on an elevator. as the door opened another guy, ed, came rushing out. (as an aside, ed had a company wide reputation for doing zero w*rk. civil service). without thinking, larry gets on and the door closed before larry realized that the elevator car was reeking of flatulant gas. larry jokingly mentioned to another cow*rker, sally (who loved to stir things up) that ed didn't at least warn larry of the pending doom. (b-t-w, ed was not the one who dropped the bomb, it was there when he got on one floor previous, hence his hurry to leave the gas chamber). well.... sally starts spreading rumors that ed was farting in elevators. it got back to ed's boss who called him on the carpet. ed, of course, denied it. boss, with ed in tow, marched up to larry's office and had ed formally apologize to larry. it was the most hilarious chain of events. fart-gate..... still get a chuckle after 8-10 years.
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