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Old 03-27-2010, 01:41 PM   #21
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Why do men consider funny women threatening? I never understood this and figured our intelligent men on this board could shed some light on this.

...

Am I on the right track here at all? Any thoughts? This question had plagued me for years, so time to ask.
I personally find the attribute of "a good sense of humor" to be a very positive thing in a woman. It does not, in my mind, enter into the power balance at all.

(Personally I think a relationship that has a power balance is suspect for other reasons...If I ever go there again a fundamental requirement would be one based on mutual respect and appreciation, not on a balance of power. But I digress.)

I think I find it a positive trait because in my mind a genuine sense of humor around others also is closely related to the ability to take life itself with a bit of a sense of humor as well, which I think is almost always useful and sometimes absolutely necessary.

I exclude from the above humor that is exceptionally vulgar, sarcastic, or personally insulting. I don't find any of that kind of humor appealing at all, but nor do I find it threatening.

Depending on the particular woman, I would be scared off of entering a relationship with a woman who is far more accomplished, more educated, or had a higher income. I am working on changing that. But outside of the relationship realm, I would not be -- I would be perfectly happy to chat it up with Oprah, for example.

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Old 03-27-2010, 01:42 PM   #22
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I recall a lover who enjoyed telling me jokes so that he could feel me laugh as he held onto me. I miss him.
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Old 03-27-2010, 01:52 PM   #23
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Sense of humor in a woman? Hmmmm...I can't tell a joke to save my life.
I have been told I am very quick witted and can come up with some pretty funny observations about people and life in general.
Personally, I like to use double entendres and pure unadulterated subtlety in my favorite sport of busting chops.
I truly like to make people laugh to offset all the "other stuff".
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Old 03-27-2010, 02:18 PM   #24
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I wouldn't be intimidated by funny women. Nor intelligent ones.

Now, in my geeky circle, I have not met a woman I admire in my field, and when I do, I may feel a bit intimidated. Maybe.

However, I know other women who know plenty about things a geek like me doesn't know. It doesn't bother me. Heck, I learn something from most people I have met.
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Old 03-27-2010, 04:13 PM   #25
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Interesting. If it were true.

I'm curious on what you're basing this conclusion. If anything, it's the self-important, overly-serious, snarly ones (of either gender, for that matter) who scare the stuffing out of me.
Since I love comedy, I read every article on women and humor I can. This "men are threatened by funny women" comes up quit abit in articles, unfortunately.
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Old 03-27-2010, 04:19 PM   #26
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Orchid: why would you assume men are threatened by funny women simply because a poll says men think men are funnier? Maybe they are just subconsciously reacting to the polls that always seem to portray women as preferring men with a sense of humor: if that's true, wouldn't evolution select for funny guys
Again, I'm NOT assuming it's true, but this is what I have read over and over all my life. Figured I'd get to the bottom of it. Some guy is threatened by funny women or else he's writing an awful lot of articles with this in the subject.


However, since a few of you honest men say that women with money and power you might find threatening--and your honesty is appreciated here--why aren't I intimidated by men with money and power? And are other women intimidated by men with money and power? Hmmmmm......wonder
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Old 03-27-2010, 04:46 PM   #27
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I'd make a distinction between a woman with a sense of humor and a comedienne. A sense of humor is very attractive to me (one of DW's great attributes), especially in a long-term relationship. Comediennes, OTOH, are usually very over-the-top sorts of people who would be just "too much" over time.

Orchidflower, if you're a fan of females in comedy, I highly recommend an interview with Phyllis Diller that Terry Gross did on her NPR show "Fresh Air". I think it was done in the '90s, and I heard a rebroadcast of it recently and really enjoyed it. PD knows her trade very well and gave a great interview about her business (how to build a joke, how many punch lines after a set-up, etc) and the life of a professional funny woman. I couldn't find a free copy of the podcast, but it is available here for purchase ($7.50) as part of Gross's interviews with comedians.

(Note, I have no commercial linkage with NPR and will not benefit from sales of this material. I do like Terry Gross!)




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Old 03-27-2010, 06:09 PM   #28
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Hey, I found this on Amazon, too. Can't beat the price....thanks alot, SamClem!!!

I have met Joan Rivers when I was pregnant and huge (they thought I was having twins but just one big 10 lb. whopper). She's pretty over-the-top in person just like she is on tv. I'll bet she's had to take alot of guff from folks not being able to "handle" her over the years...mighty tough babe now I'm sure to survive like she has all these years.
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Old 03-27-2010, 06:20 PM   #29
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Why do men consider funny women threatening?
They do? No one told me!! Hope they don't kick me out of the club
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Old 03-27-2010, 07:13 PM   #30
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Why do men consider funny women threatening?
I don't know if you mean female professional comics, female jokesters in your social group, or funny lovers.

I remember various things about different women, but one thing I almost never forget is a woman who gently but accurately lampooned my ridiculous self-importance. When I was young, many women tended to be deferential toward us men and we could get away with being real idiots for a long time.

I would like to find some of them and tell them they alone saw my soul. I was such a dope that merely to stay with me proved that they had to be seeing something to at least partially compensate for the rest.

Ha
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Old 03-27-2010, 07:31 PM   #31
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I don't know if you mean female professional comics, female jokesters in your social group, or funny lovers.

I remember various things about different women, but one thing I almost never forget is a woman who gently but accurately lampooned my ridiculous self-importance. When I was young, many women tended to be deferential toward us men and we could get away with being real idiots for a long time.

I would like to find some of them and tell them they alone saw my soul. I was such a dope that merely to stay with me proved that they had to be seeing something to at least partially compensate for the rest.

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Old 03-27-2010, 07:46 PM   #32
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I don't know if you mean female professional comics, female jokesters in your social group, or funny lovers.

I remember various things about different women, but one thing I almost never forget is a woman who gently but accurately lampooned my ridiculous self-importance. When I was young, many women tended to be deferential toward us men and we could get away with being real idiots for a long time.

I would like to find some of them and tell them they alone saw my soul. I was such a dope that merely to stay with me proved that they had to be seeing something to at least partially compensate for the rest.

Ha
The article was about professional female/male comedians.


Somebody earlier made a comment on how they knew a gal who could write funny but wasn't funny in real life. If you know Ron "They call me Tater Salad" White who does those Blue Collar Comedy shows, his lines actually aren't funny if you were to read them. It's his superb timing that makes him so funny and great. I don't think this is all that uncommon for many comics, really.
So, if this lady could write funny she should have gone to L.A. and made some money off that talent that most comics don't seem to have. Studio City would just love her I'll bet.
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Old 03-27-2010, 08:04 PM   #33
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As Sam and I both said their is a difference between a professional comedian and somebody who just funny. The couple of woman who I've dated who were genuinely LOL funny weren't at all intimidating and were a lot of fun to be around.

However, I spent couple of days around comedian/actor Kevin Pollack who was starring in computer film, I was the executive producer of. A funny guy and relatively low key for a comedian, but I could easily see how the competitive nature of their humor would be intimidating. You say something funny they have to top it, you say something dumb, and they make fun of it. I could easily see how this would be intimidating.

Both Kevin and the director knew Robin Williams before he was really famous and they said hanging around the hyper active Williams was exhausting.
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Old 03-27-2010, 08:14 PM   #34
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I'm not threatened by a woman that is hilarious. But then, I work in an occupation where the only thing we have to stave off certain insanity is humor. Mental health workers and cops are in this category. That's we we have the two kinds of macabre humor: mental health humor and cop humor. Eitehr group that works with a wide population and has to deal with horribly home situations, suicides, death develop humor as a solution or they don't last long, or they become a kind of morose mental handicap themselves.

add nurses to that ! Most successful nurses find the humor in things . Let's face it dealing with sick and dying people all day is depressing . By the way I can be pretty funny and most guys like it . The ultra serious ones just don't get it but who wants to spend their life with someone ultra serious ?
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Old 03-27-2010, 09:49 PM   #35
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As Sam and I both said their is a difference between a professional comedian and somebody who just funny. The couple of woman who I've dated who were genuinely LOL funny weren't at all intimidating and were a lot of fun to be around.

However, I spent couple of days around comedian/actor Kevin Pollack who was starring in computer film, I was the executive producer of. A funny guy and relatively low key for a comedian, but I could easily see how the competitive nature of their humor would be intimidating. You say something funny they have to top it, you say something dumb, and they make fun of it. I could easily see how this would be intimidating.

Both Kevin and the director knew Robin Williams before he was really famous and they said hanging around the hyper active Williams was exhausting.
I surely could understand that. Being around Joan Rivers--who has to be always "on"--would be somewhat boring/tiring after awhile.
Kevin Pollack has done very well for himself, because I knew who he was off the top of my head. He always seems like a nice guy in general to me. I gather he was...nice.
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Old 03-27-2010, 10:06 PM   #36
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never met a funny woman
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Old 03-27-2010, 10:37 PM   #37
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Frankly, I find the whole question sexist and silly. Gee, let's drag out the other stereotypes:

- Why do all men love scratching themselves and killing things?

- Why do women love to cook for their men?

- Why are men so bad at raising kids?

- Why do women take so long to get ready to go out for an evening?
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Old 03-28-2010, 05:34 AM   #38
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The statement is a bit of a generalization. But I catch your drift.

I really think it depends on the person and their mindset. Some men are put off if the humor is perceived as threatening in some way or violates their personal mores. But I have seen my DW put off by certain humor from female comics... but also by male comics.
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Old 03-28-2010, 09:15 AM   #39
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Frankly, I find the whole question sexist and silly. Gee, let's drag out the other stereotypes:

- Why do all men love scratching themselves and killing things?

- Why do women love to cook for their men?

- Why are men so bad at raising kids?

- Why do women take so long to get ready to go out for an evening?

Hit a nerve did we? Life is often made of stereotypical thinking. Read the post above yours that out of all the women this person has ever known--and surely they haven't live in an all male monastery all their life--there has not been one single funny women around ever?
This subject may be stereotypical--and I surely agree it is--but why does it exist at all? Is there some grain of truth to it? Or not?
Do funny women threaten most men or not was the original question. Most all the men here say no but that may be due to the maturity level of the men here...or not.

So far as finding the question sexist, yeah, it is. Silly to you but not to me (and maybe a couple other women), but if it is then it is. Doesn't mean I, myself and maybe by myself, still wouldn't like to know why men are threatened by funny women as I have read over and over.

As far as your examples, Brewer, the two in the middle I've never heard of before. Maybe they haven't hit the Midwest yet?
But I can answer the last one as to why it takes women so long to get dressed: makeup, pantyhose or similar, jewelry and hair does take forever. Until we change traditional dress codes for women in this country, you guys are just going to have to suffer I guess...along with us gals. Heck, we'd love to just shave and go ourselves you know..ha! You guys don't know how easy you have it now do you?
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Old 03-28-2010, 09:32 AM   #40
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- Why do women love to cook for their men?
...
DW can single handedly disprove this one.
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