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Old 02-16-2011, 05:37 PM   #21
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Originally Posted by DFA View Post
I am in the IT business and when I ask why they think I should do consulting their answer is to keep my skill fresh

Again, am I missing something here??
Sure. I can translate.

"When you run out of money because you retired way too early and have to get a job, at least you will still have up to date skills and might have a prayer of finding at least some job."

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Old 02-16-2011, 05:59 PM   #22
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
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Not certain...but I can assume that talking about retirement with "others"...other than close family...probably puts them on the defensive....meaning they are simultaneously thinking, "he's retiring?, gosh I didn't know he had THAT much money, gosh...I don't...dang it", well...he/she is not one of us anymore"..etc...etc.
Herd mentality so to speak.
They also probably have nothing else they can searching for common ground is paramount to communication. You became "uncommon ground". (LOL!)
The thing that gets me is is as if they automatically assume your work ethic just went down the toilet.

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Old 02-16-2011, 06:58 PM   #23
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Originally Posted by DFA View Post
I have been telling my friends and family about my plan to retire in 2013, but they keep tell me "you could do consulting".
Again, am I missing something here??
Sounds like you won't be missing some of your friends & family...

We servicemembers & veterans got a whole blog post out of that subject:
Myths of military retirement and early retirement | Military Retirement & Financial Independence

The book written on, "The Military Guide to Financial Independence and Retirement", on sale now! For more info see "About Me" in my profile.
I don't spend much time here anymore, so please send me a PM. Thanks.
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Old 02-16-2011, 07:08 PM   #24
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This is very interesting. On a retired teachers' forum, someone advised a few months ago to not talk about plans to retire. I follow that advice now, but not at first because I didn't get it. (now i do).

One of my closest colleague friends was totally shocked when I told her that i am retiring in 2012. When i told her about plans to try new things, do things I never have time for now, etc.. she said several things like, This is my hobby, this is what i do for fun. I cannot imagine giving this up. And, truly, she is a workaholic and does alllllllll sorts of extra things for the school on her own time.

Since then, i do not talk about retirement plans at work.

Congratulations on your upcoming retirement!!!
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Old 02-16-2011, 07:13 PM   #25
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Originally Posted by DFA View Post
Youbet wrote:

BTW, what were you expecting to hear?

I don't know what I expected to hear just was not expceting to get what I got.

I only talk to Very Close family and only one friend about RE.
Gosh DFA, I think you're making something out of nothing. So you told some very close family members and one friend you'd likely ER in the future. They suggested you could do some consulting to keep your skills up. In other words, they suggested some risk mitigation. That's typical for folks close to you. Had you mentioned you'd be getting yourself a Red Ryder BB gun, they would have warned you that you could shoot your eye out!

Good deal on keeping your upcoming ER news within a close circle. Don't worry about casual comments regarding risk mitigation from loved ones. Finish getting yourself ready and go enjoy FIRE!
"I wasn't born blue blood. I was born blue-collar." John Wort Hannam
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Old 02-16-2011, 09:57 PM   #26
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Originally Posted by youbet View Post
Gosh DFA, I think you're making something out of nothing. So you told some very close family members and one friend you'd likely ER in the future. They suggested you could do some consulting to keep your skills up. In other words, they suggested some risk mitigation. That's typical for folks close to you. Had you mentioned you'd be getting yourself a Red Ryder BB gun, they would have warned you that you could shoot your eye out!
Watched that movie over the holidays.
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Old 02-17-2011, 08:07 AM   #27
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The only thing about keeping hush hush about it is the shock and even panic some may experience if not prepared for the news when you finally do pull the plug on working....

Some people might assume you are some point if you actually do RE, you will have to let others in on it...if it is not something to be ashamed of --and it is not as far as I and most people on these boards are concerned---then why keep totally secret about it....

I say plant the seeds....if your reason for retiring is that you don't like the job, don't hide the idea that you might somehow one day find something else to do (frequently singing or humming "there's gotta be something better than this" from SWEET CHARITY might be all the hinting you need to do)
I do think a little prep is in order...remember the joke about the brother who was taking care of his brother's cat while the one brother/ cat owner was on and the cat died. Vacationing brother called just to check in and cat sitter said bluntly "The cat died." After recovering from the shock the cat owner chided his brother on his communication skills. "You have to break news like that gently. For instance when I called you could have just said something like 'the cat's on the roof and we can't get her down.' Later I would call back and you could tell me the cat fell off but you were taking her to the vet...finally when I called later I would be ready for the news that she died."
A few weeks went by, the vacationing brother returned, got a new cat, etc. One Sunday he called his brother to check up on things.
"How's it going?" he asked
His brother replied "Mom's on the roof and we can't get her down."
Let them know your career is on the roof.
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Old 02-17-2011, 11:32 AM   #28
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i did not tell many people outside of work, just a few. no one was anything but supportive of my decision.

when it was announced in work people i seldom said more than hello to and even some i wouldn't even say hello to were happy for me. i was surprised at the latter group. many did ask what will you do but many knew i was big time into gardening so they knew i wanted to time to garden. odd thing is i do less of it now than when working! but to those that asked what will you do i always said i'll do what i want, when i want, wake up when i want and not have to put up with the lousy commute. everyone seemed to relate to that!
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Old 02-17-2011, 12:41 PM   #29
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In some cases I think it's jealousy. In other cases, they may be projecting their own financial insecurity or desire to remain "engaged" with the workplace onto your situation. They may not feel comfortable that they can retire without ever needing to work again, or that they will never miss the workplace -- hence "keeping the skills sharp."

When I cash out, I plan to let those skills dull through non-use over the course of many years.
"Hey, for every ten dollars, that's another hour that I have to be in the work place. That's an hour of my life. And my life is a very finite thing. I have only 'x' number of hours left before I'm dead. So how do I want to use these hours of my life? Do I want to use them just spending it on more crap and more stuff, or do I want to start getting a handle on it and using my life more intelligently?" -- Joe Dominguez (1938 - 1997)

RIP to Reemy, my avatar dog (2003 - 9/16/2017)
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Old 02-17-2011, 01:54 PM   #30
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Thanks all; many very great comments. I guess I will just stop talking about it to people and when the time comes just wish them well and disappear hopefully to a different country (if I can get DW to go);0)
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Old 02-17-2011, 02:35 PM   #31
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I believe that most folks frame the decisions of others based upon their own beliefs.

If they never considered the option of ER, than why should you?

It's the same for many things in life. If they have children (or not), why don't you (or not).

If they buy American branded cars, why don't you?

If they live in the city, why do you live in the country?

You get the idea. Your decision is outside the norm of what they think - nothing more or less.

When I retired a few years ago (not ER, but at age 59 much earlier than any of my/DW's relatives) they could not understand how I could do it let alone why I would do such a thing; especially with what it costs to live, the availability of j*bs, etc.

Four years later, they still may not understand, but then again they don't ask these days.

It's no different than DW who spent a few weeks in Cairo in November, with another woman who shares her "wanderlust". They could not see anybody that would want to travel outside CONUS on their own. Needless to say, they had a lot of questions for her once things started to get out of hand over there. At least they were then interested in the living conditions of the folks along the river (they were also on a Nile cruise).

Whatever you do in life, you will always have those that will just look at you and shake their heads. That's OK. I don't need their approval to live my life the way I want to (other than the approval of my DW, of course! )...
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Old 02-19-2011, 01:12 PM   #32
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I am also in IT Semiretired now working for someone else. I was a consultant for years and I don't see how people view this as something for retirement.

Anyway, I tell people that I am semiretired and they generally say good for you!

Four mornings a week in IT is about all that I want right now. The drama, stress, deadlines of the job have all been gone for several years. I show up do what is asked of me and leave by 1:30.
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Old 02-19-2011, 02:48 PM   #33
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Just shake your head yes and say 'good idea'. I took a 3 month gig this winter so I could have earned income and fund my roth for 2011. It is in the medical reporting area. It is very easy work for the money. People are very nice and give me more than enough time to do the work. It turns out the ERP system they use is very popular in hospitals and the demand for reporting skills far exceeds the supply.

This is the first time in 20 years that I am living 'at' my means. i.e. spending it all (except the roth). I pre-paid my Yellowstone lodging, bought a used dual sport bike for Colorado trail riding this summer and have set aside $$ for 2 summer trips.

It is interesting listing to cube mates call the bank and put $50 in to stop the overdraft fees, borrow $ to buy a mattress, other temp workers call the payroll dept when the direct deposit is 1 day late. Pretty scary.

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