Join Early Retirement Today
Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Why do others not want me to retire????
Old 02-16-2011, 12:47 PM   #1
Recycles dryer sheets
DFA's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Earth
Posts: 311
Why do others not want me to retire????

I have been telling my friends and family about my plan to retire in 2013, but they keep tell me "you could do consulting".

I though that retirement was not doing working and enjoying life, am I missing something??

I am in the IT business and when I ask why they think I should do consulting their answer is to keep my skill fresh

Again, am I missing something here??
__________________

__________________
DFA is offline   Reply With Quote
Join the #1 Early Retirement and Financial Independence Forum Today - It's Totally Free!

Are you planning to be financially independent as early as possible so you can live life on your own terms? Discuss successful investing strategies, asset allocation models, tax strategies and other related topics in our online forum community. Our members range from young folks just starting their journey to financial independence, military retirees and even multimillionaires. No matter where you fit in you'll find that Early-Retirement.org is a great community to join. Best of all it's totally FREE!

You are currently viewing our boards as a guest so you have limited access to our community. Please take the time to register and you will gain a lot of great new features including; the ability to participate in discussions, network with our members, see fewer ads, upload photographs, create a retirement blog, send private messages and so much, much more!

Old 02-16-2011, 12:52 PM   #2
Recycles dryer sheets
robbridg's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Allen Park
Posts: 118
The think most people don't understand how to plan for retirement and are afraid of the process. Therefore, they are afraid for you.

If I ask a few of my friends here at work, who are 10-15 years older than myself (mid 50s), about retirement they either say that they'll never be able to retire or they don't have a clue about how to plan for it.
__________________

__________________
robbridg is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-16-2011, 12:57 PM   #3
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
haha's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Hooverville
Posts: 22,380
DFA, I want you to retire. I see beauty in your plan.
__________________
"As a general rule, the more dangerous or inappropriate a conversation, the more interesting it is."-Scott Adams
haha is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-16-2011, 01:09 PM   #4
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
braumeister's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Northern Kentucky
Posts: 8,582
Quote:
Originally Posted by robbridg View Post
The think most people don't understand how to plan for retirement and are afraid of the process. Therefore, they are afraid for you.
I agree with this response. The majority of your friends probably have the old fashioned idea that retirement is something that happens to you when you're too old to do useful work any more. The concept of voluntary early retirement is simply foreign to them.
__________________
Pas de lieu Rhône que nous.
braumeister is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 02-16-2011, 01:16 PM   #5
Full time employment: Posting here.
flyfishnevada's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Smith
Posts: 743
Get used to it. Many people either have no desire to retire or no means to retire. They are jealous, fearful or just don't understand the motivation. They compel you to do something familiar. Work more.

Don't listen. Too many people, for many different reasons, feel that retirement is the end. The end of life, the end of good times, the end of usefulness, whatever. You know different. It's the beginning of the best part of your life. Go do it and do it without shame or fear. Just be prepared for all the naysayers.
__________________
Retired July 4th, 2010 at age 43
Trout Bum, Writer, Full-Time Dad and Husband


flyfishnevada is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-16-2011, 01:22 PM   #6
Moderator Emeritus
 
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 11,031
I want you to retire too.

Given the number of people who asked me "what will you do all do" and "how can you afford not to work anymore", I have concluded that:

1) Many people wouldn't know what to do with themselves if left with a lifetime of leisure on their hands.

2) Many people can't afford to retire at a young age, so why should you?

I also think that some people see retirement as a waste. People think that "consulting" is a gold mine and might wonder why you are leaving so much money on the table by retiring. The concept of "enough" is pretty foreign to Americans, IMO. "Not working and enjoying life" is more dolce vita than protestant work ethic.
__________________
FIREd is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-16-2011, 01:26 PM   #7
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
bbbamI's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Dallas 'burb
Posts: 9,039
Why do others not want me to retire?

I dunno....ask them.
__________________
There's no need to complicate, our time is short..
bbbamI is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-16-2011, 01:33 PM   #8
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Rustic23's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Lake Livingston, Tx
Posts: 3,624
Not me, you keep on working! Somebody has to keep SS funded!
__________________
If it is after 5:00 when I post I reserve the right to disavow anything I posted.
Rustic23 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-16-2011, 01:49 PM   #9
Moderator Emeritus
Bestwifeever's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 16,372
I looked at your earlier post and you certainly look like you're in good shape to retire as planned. Maybe they're worried about the Italy part of your plan not working out?

People who consult seem to be for the most part either people who need the money and weren't able to get a "regular" job in their field "in these tough economic times," or people who are already financially independent and enjoy the stuff that goes with consulting including the flexibility to turn down a project. I'm sure your friends and family think of you in the second category.
__________________
“Would you like an adventure now, or would you like to have your tea first?” J.M. Barrie, Peter Pan
Bestwifeever is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-16-2011, 01:52 PM   #10
gone traveling
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Eastern PA
Posts: 3,851
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rustic23 View Post
Not me, you keep on working! Somebody has to keep SS funded!
I agree. You should w*rk till you drop...
__________________
rescueme is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-16-2011, 02:02 PM   #11
Recycles dryer sheets
Nova's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 270
We pulled the plug at 49 and traveled extensively in our RV for a number of years. The fact that I was open with our RV travel plans diffused the "what will you do with yourself", so that wasn't an issue. People at work had one of two reactions; they either thought we were crazy, or wished they could do the same. OTOH, the reception we received in RV resorts was an eye-opener. We were officially too young to stay in 55+ parks, although most made exceptions (we didn't work, didn't have children, and we weren't loud and rowdy). I was absolutely amazed at the number of rude remarks made to/about us by the older set. We frequently heard...why aren't you still working, we had to work until we were 65 so why don't you. Oh, and the most frequent question (declaration actually) you must be retired military. No, not retired military...and so on.

What we learned was a lot of people don't understand your decision to retire early and many actually resent it. We stopped trying to explain our decision and learned to say something like, we've had all of the fun in corporate life that we could stand so we're trying this for a while. In your case, maybe you could just agree to think about consulting.

PS: We also came to love camping in wilderness areas and pretty much gave up on 55+ RV resorts.
__________________
Nova is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-16-2011, 02:03 PM   #12
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
freebird5825's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: East Nowhere, 43N Latitude, NY
Posts: 9,017
I also got the old "do some consulting" advice too. I was an Engineer, and these were other Engineers telling me to do this.
What they didn't realize was I was tired of the politics and stress, hence the LAST thing I would do after FIRE is perform like a monkey stay in the field drawing a paycheck.
It was fun in the early part of my c*reer, but when it was no longer fun...it was time to do something else.
Specifically...the first and only choice was FIRE!!!!!

I think you should do what YOU want.
__________________
"All our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them." - Walt Disney
freebird5825 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-16-2011, 02:12 PM   #13
Recycles dryer sheets
DFA's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Earth
Posts: 311
Maybe the SS is what they want me work for; so they will have money when they retire just like several of the post here;0)

I think I will take my chances and skip the consulting.

Thanks all for the comments!!
__________________
DFA is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-16-2011, 02:22 PM   #14
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
youbet's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Chicago
Posts: 9,965
Quote:
Originally Posted by DFA View Post
I have been telling my friends and family about my plan to retire in 2013, but they keep tell me "you could do consulting".

I though that retirement was not doing working and enjoying life, am I missing something??

I am in the IT business and when I ask why they think I should do consulting their answer is to keep my skill fresh

Again, am I missing something here??
Yes, you're missing something extremely important. If you're talking to anyone other than your closest family and a very few trusted confidants, you're making a huge mistake. What you're missing out on is the fact that whether you're talking your RE up to gain consensual validation or just to have your ego stroked, you're bringing up a subject where you're unlikely to hear the responses you want.

BTW, what were you expecting to hear?

There is an easy solution. Zip it outside of your DW and maybe a trusted, kindred spirit friend or two. The results of your decision will be yours to bear and you know how you want to live your life. So, go do it. Stop talking about it...........

And, enjoy FIRE!
__________________
"I wasn't born blue blood. I was born blue-collar." John Wort Hannam
youbet is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-16-2011, 03:03 PM   #15
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
martyb's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Bossier City
Posts: 2,182
Quote:
Originally Posted by haha View Post
DFA, I want you to retire. I see beauty in your plan.

me too! I talked to a lady at my front door last night ( she knocked to ask me who owned the truck parked in front of my apt.) for about 10 minutes. During the conversation, she asked me where I worked. I told her, told her a little about my job with the govt. based at a local defense contractor. She seemed interested. Then, I told her I planned to retire in 23 months. She thought that was funny, especially after I told her I am now 53, & would be 55 when I retire. She said she would be working until at least age 70, if not longer. I felt sorry for her, but she didn't seem to think it was any big deal. She knows she has no option, because she hasn't planned for retirement. She's just gonna keep working till she maxes her SS and that's what she'll live on. I love boats, but I'm glad I'm not in that one!
__________________
“Change is the law of life. And those who look only to the past or present are certain to miss the future.”
-John F. Kennedy

“Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?” - Edgar Bergen
martyb is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-16-2011, 03:26 PM   #16
Moderator
Sarah in SC's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Charleston, SC
Posts: 13,456
marty, a friend told us one day that he'd have to work so long that they would have to dig him up to clock in at work! I have never forgotten the look on DHs face when he heard that. Not for us! Some people seem remarkably resigned to it. For this fellow, though, we worry, as his is a very physical job.
__________________
“One day your life will flash before your eyes. Make sure it's worth watching.”
Gerard Arthur Way

Sarah in SC is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-16-2011, 03:40 PM   #17
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Purron's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 5,584
Hey, I'm totally cool with you being retired. As long as you stay off my lawn
__________________
I purr therefore I am.
Purron is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-16-2011, 03:45 PM   #18
Recycles dryer sheets
DFA's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Earth
Posts: 311
Youbet wrote:

BTW, what were you expecting to hear?



I don't know what I expected to hear just was not expceting to get what I got.

I only talk to Very Close family and only one friend about RE.
__________________
DFA is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-16-2011, 04:49 PM   #19
Moderator Emeritus
 
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 11,031
Yet another data point:

This is a gorgeous day here in the southeast, so I decided to sunbathe for a few hours outside my favorite coffee shop. A group of well-dressed middle aged men sat at the table next to me (looks like they were fresh off the gold course) and started talking about retirement. Several of them made negative comments regarding retirement in general. They all agreed that, even if they had a few million dollars, they would continue working to "have something to do all day". Gosh, people really have no imagination. All also wished they could inherit a few million dollars to have the "option" to retire. I found two things particularly interesting here: 1) during the conversation, "inheriting money" and "retirement" were always connected. I guess making/saving money the old fashion way was not so appealing for them. 2) these five guys were professing their love for work and disdain for retirement while clearly enjoying a beautiful Wednesday afternoon away from work alongside us retirees.
__________________
FIREd is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-16-2011, 05:09 PM   #20
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Amethyst's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 5,872
Some people automatically associate "retired" with "cranky, boring, and in poor health" because those are the only kinds of retired folks they have ever met or seen. So when you say "I want to retire soon," they picture you becoming like that overnight, and they feel sorry for you.

Amethyst
__________________

__________________
If you understood everything I say, you'd be me ~ Miles Davis
'There is only one success – to be able to spend your life in your own way.’ Christopher Morley.
Amethyst is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Now, this is the way to retire! FinallyRetired Other topics 6 08-10-2010 12:36 PM
Retire later, retire happier JustCurious Life after FIRE 20 09-17-2007 08:56 AM
Retire or Not retire troyray55 Hi, I am... 11 06-16-2007 11:38 AM
Retire or Not Retire - Everyone has a choice! huutrinon Hi, I am... 1 05-04-2007 04:34 PM
September 19, a good day to retire, if I were to retire, but I am not Martha Other topics 26 09-20-2006 11:59 AM

 

 
All times are GMT -6. The time now is 05:39 AM.
 
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.