Why the 'D'?

[Martha]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gumby In conversation, I usually refer to her as my lovely young wife or my bride. *

I know several people who refer to wives as brides. I find it a bit odd sounding; men are never refered to a grooms.

I don't get too wound up about what men and women call each other, but for some reason I have never liked hearing "ladies" in reference to a group of women. It always sounds smarmy to me. "Well laaadieees, what can I bring you today?"

Greg will on occasion refer to me as "the wife," but it doesn't bug me, maybe because he is really just trying to tease.

[sgeeeee]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Martha . . . I don't get too* wound up about what men and women call each other, but for some reason I have never liked hearing "ladies" in reference to a group of women.* It always sounds smarmy to me.* "Well laaadieees, what can I bring you today?". . .

I just wish someone would give me a playbook so I can refer to people however they want. "Ladies" seems like an obvious and non-negative greeting to a group of females to me. But I will try to avoid it in the future. I also tend to use "gentlemen" to address a group of males -- especially if the group seems to be somewhat formally dressed. I also tend to use "ladies" or "gentlemen" with groups of young children. I find that it gets their attention.

Out of curiosity, is it also objectionable if someone addresses a crowd as "ladies and gentlemen"?

[cube_rat]

Quote:

Originally Posted by sgeeeee Out of curiosity, is it also objectionable if someone addresses a crowd as "ladies and gentlemen"?

I don't find being addressed as a lady objectionable. I do get rather pissed off insulted if I'm addressed as a girl.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Martha I know several people who refer to wives as brides. I find it a bit odd sounding; men are never refered to a grooms.

I worked with a gal that introduced her mate as 'my current husband'

[Martha]

Quote:

Originally Posted by sgeeeee I just wish someone would give me a playbook so I can refer to people however they want.* "Ladies" seems like an obvious and non-negative greeting to a group of females to me.* But I will try to avoid it in the future.* I also tend to use "gentlemen" to address a group of males -- especially if the group seems to be somewhat formally dressed.* I also tend to use "ladies" or "gentlemen" with groups of young children.* I find that it gets their attention. Out of curiosity, is it also objectionable if someone addresses a crowd as "ladies and gentlemen"?* *

I wouldn't tell you to stop using "ladies." It isn't about being pc or anthing; it is just something that grates on me for unknown reasons.

[haha]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Martha IIt isn't about being pc or anthing; it is just something that grates on me for unknown reasons.* *

Maybe because when you look into the mirror you see a bad-assing, honky tonking, butt kicking Big Momma?*

I'd* feel the same way.*

Ha

[Martha]

Quote:

Originally Posted by HaHa Maybe because when you look into the mirror you see a bad-assing, honky tonking, butt kicking Big Momma?* I'd* feel the same way.* Ha

I write a lot of letters in my work. I don't use any salutation at the beginning nor do I use a closing. Years ago I read a demand letter from an attorney that started: "dear so and so" and ended "Very truly yours, blah blah." Too funny. I quit using saluations after that.

I also speak to groups of people fairly frequently. I never refer to them as "ladies and gentlemen." I just start talking.

So much for Miss Manners.

[Sarah in SC]

I thought I'd object to being referred to as "Honey", until I heard it from the forest ranger at the State Forestry office where I worked in college in the following context: "Honey, I took care of that traffic ticket that you got last week." *
Then I was fine with it. * * *Southern girls don't mind so much being called girls, but we are usually opposed to being called "fast".
Sarah

[d]

Quote:

I don't use any salutation at the beginning nor do I use a closing.

interesting ... we're in a distinct minority. rather than "dear x:" *i usually begin with "mr/ms x:", or if i don't have a specific name, "greetings:" *definitely no "sincerely", but if i've made a request i generally close with "thank you for your consideration", otherwise nothing. *on the other hand, when addressing individuals or groups i am overly deferential: sir, ma'm, ladies and gentlemen (even when we know they're not!)

[sgeeeee]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Martha I write a lot of letters in my work.* I don't use any salutation at the beginning nor do I use a closing.* Years ago I read a demand letter from an attorney that started: "dear so and so" and ended "Very truly yours, blah blah."* Too funny.* I quit using saluations after that.* I also speak to groups of people fairly frequently.* I never refer to them as "ladies and gentlemen."* I just start talking.* * So much for Miss Manners.

I avoid salutations for the same reason. *I do offer my "Regards" as a closing, but only if I mean it. *Otherwise I avoid closings too.

I speak fairly often to groups and have never used "Ladies and Gentlemen" as an opening myself. *I try to begin my presentations by conveying some respect and appreciation for the audience that has turned up to listen to me. *I think that is what other people who use that phrase are trying to do. *It's a bit too formal and conventional to suit my style, but I've never viewed it as a bad thing. *

[Sam]

I have read about hijacking threads on this board, and now I have the pleasure of experiencing it.* Thank you, Ladies and Gentlemen* :P

Sincerely, and best regards.*

[Martha]

and to you to, DP, MF.

[haha]

I love flowery honorifics. When I had to use Spanish it was an eye opener for me. I was natively much less socially abrupt than the typical Yankee or Scandinavian, since I had been drilled in being a nice Southern boy.

But those Latinos taught me how to be truly polite. Like how to spend a half hour saying goodbye. Also how to feel comfortable with giving and receiving warm hugs from men.

Once I had been there long enough to feel like I was living in their language, it really changed my personality, and IMO for the better.

I am losing my language skills, and unfortunately too much of the agreeableness that went with them.

Of course, one reason for all the politeness is the same as it is or was in the American South. The people have a violent streak; they would rather not piss one another off.

Ha

[Nords]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cut-Throat I worked with a gal that introduced her mate as 'my current husband'

I knew a guy who introduced his spouse as "my first wife"... come to think of it, I haven't heard from him in a while.

[kathyet]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Outtahere Or in some cases* Darned Poster!

Depending on the mood of the day it could be Darling W or H or Dam- or dum-, or or or? But it just makes it "nice" or "not" with feeling?

Kathyet




Kathyet

[Gumby]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nords I knew a guy who introduced his spouse as "my first wife"... come to think of it, I haven't heard from him in a while.

I once knew a professor who was notorious for marrying and divorcing his students. The rest of us referred to the current object of his affection as the FFMW, which stands for the "future former Mrs. Whatever."

[Nords]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gumby I once knew a professor who was notorious for marrying and divorcing his students.

Man, I sure hope you're referring to law school and not USNA!

[flipstress]

Using DH and DW strikes me as similar to authors using "Gentle Reader," which I find quaint, not unpleasing.

My parents all their lives called each other "Dear", almost always the only English word in their statements to each other, so the word has good connotations for me.

My BF on the other hand calls me "Haystacks" sometimes when I get paunchy.* I find it funny because I had no idea who Haystacks Calhoun was except for BF telling me he's a wrestler.* I'm gonna google him now.* (Edited to add:* Now I know: http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com...s-calhoun.html )

DPS to me was always Department of Public Sanitation, the agency back home that took care of hauling garbage and maybe some more other things.* They didn't have such a sweet-smelling reputation Garbage collection was hit-and-miss.

[HFWR]

Quote:

I find it funny because I had no idea who Haystacks Calhoun was except for BF telling me he's a wrestler.

Boy, that activated a long-dormant brain cell... Used to watch Haystack, and Dick the Bruiser, among others, on WTTV out of Bloomington/Indianapolis in the early 60s...

[haha]

Quote:

Originally Posted by flipstress My BF on the other hand calls me "Haystacks" sometimes when I get paunchy.* I find it funny because I had no idea who Haystacks Calhoun was except for BF telling me he's a wrestler.* I'm gonna google him now.* (Edited to add:* Now I know: http://www.obsessedwithwrestling.com...s-calhoun.html )

So now that you know who haystacks is, are you gonna rename your BF John Wayne Bobbit?*

Ha