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View Poll Results: Have you ever cried at work?
Yes 34 58.62%
No 15 25.86%
Not exactly cried--tearful, sniffly, etc. 9 15.52%
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Women Cry More At Work
Old 03-19-2008, 04:25 PM   #1
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Women Cry More At Work

No great revelation here, but a California professor has found that every woman interviewed for the study has cried at work.

cbs5.com - UCD Study Finds Women Cry More On The Job Than Men

Don't kick me out of the sisterhood---I really am female---but I've never cried at work. Yup, I've had frustrations, both personal and professional. But I don't think crying is appropriate. I worked at a place where even the head of the company cried. It was almost like a badge of honor. Not me. Then again, I'm not much of a crier, even at home. Just during sad movies or schmaltzy commercials (for a while, insipid Hallmark commercials).

For the females here:

Have you ever cried at work?
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Old 03-19-2008, 04:41 PM   #2
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I agree. It's inappropriate. But I had to vote yes. My crying was involuntary. It was rare but it happened.
There was a guy there who screamed (unrelated to my crying). That was inappropriate, too. I expect he'd say the same thing, except the part about it being rare.
Now that I'm ERed I have much less occasion to cry.
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Old 03-19-2008, 05:25 PM   #3
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Yes. Several times over the years. I've usually managed to hold it together until I was alone or with one coworker. I can think of one occasion when I cried in front of my then-boss. He brought almost everyone in the office, male and female, to tears at one point or another--thankfully, I was crying over a personal issue rather than his catty comments!
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Old 03-19-2008, 05:31 PM   #4
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We keep kleenex handy at work in case a client cries; happens about once every three years--reminds me what the business is all about. I've never seen a male client cry but some of them are just as bad off. Don't think I've ever been caught crying at work.
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Old 03-19-2008, 05:42 PM   #5
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I voted no (the only no to six yeses and a sniffle so far). But now that I think about it, I cried while watching the World Trade Center collapse on TV, and that was at work. I had to leave the room.
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Old 03-19-2008, 05:55 PM   #6
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I got choked up and tearful at work a little bit ago, but it was family related stress. Were you talking about crying about work at work or about anything at work? This was during a private conversation.
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Old 03-19-2008, 06:18 PM   #7
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During early menopause I got teary several times . Other than that only once and it was while talking about a personal loss .
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Old 03-19-2008, 06:46 PM   #8
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Yup, I cried. Unbeknownst to me at the time, there are men who will go into a shoe store and remove their socks and ask a young, naive, 18 year old girl to feel between their toes. Decorum prevents me mentioning the rest of the story here. We have decorum here, right?
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Old 03-19-2008, 07:11 PM   #9
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Yup, I cried. Unbeknownst to me at the time, there are men who will go into a shoe store and remove their socks and ask a young, naive, 18 year old girl to feel between their toes. Decorum prevents me mentioning the rest of the story here. We have decorum here, right?

Is this why you call yourself Shoe?
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Old 03-19-2008, 07:37 PM   #10
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Yes, Martha!
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Old 03-19-2008, 08:12 PM   #11
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Why is crying at work inappropriate? True, some people will react in a negative way towards people who cry, but crying is a natural emotion. Work can be rough, your boss or coworkers can be jerks. I've been in conversations with both men and women who cried, both for work and non-work reasons.
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Old 03-19-2008, 08:49 PM   #12
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I work around lots of tears. Generally I find that I can be of more comfort to people by being empathetic but composed; they seem to seek a steady presence as their world is crumbling around them. Sometimes it's hard to keep my composure and I'll well up, but I don't recall outwardly sobbing or crying in that situation.

Once or twice a year it catches up to me after losing a difficult battle or when I have grown fond of the patient and family. I steal away by myself, have a minute or two to reach for the Kleenex and go on with my work. While I'm self-conscious about it, I take great relief when this happens.

Crying can be displaced. I grieved but didn't shed a tear when my dad died. Last year when my dog died, I cried like a baby albeit briefly, and had fleeting unexpected thoughts about my dad.
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Old 03-19-2008, 09:31 PM   #13
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I voted no (the only no to six yeses and a sniffle so far). But now that I think about it, I cried while watching the World Trade Center collapse on TV, and that was at work. I had to leave the room.
You get paid to watch tv? Can I have your job. We don't have any tv's where I work and if I was caught on the internet i'd be fired on the spot.

As for crying at work, there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. That is if they're legitimate tears and not just someone turning on the water works in an effort to get out of trouble with the boss.
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Old 03-19-2008, 09:49 PM   #14
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You get paid to watch tv? Can I have your job. We don't have any tv's where I work and if I was caught on the internet i'd be fired on the spot.
Oh yeah, I get paid to sit around all day and watch tv.

If you saw Private Benjamin you'd know what the recruiter said about the army. They get condos, we get paid to watch TV all day.

More info at USAJOBS - The Federal Government's Official Jobs Site
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Old 03-19-2008, 10:47 PM   #15
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Female here. I remember crying 3 times at work in the last 8 years, but there was probably more. The most recent was last Wednesday. I was just too stressed and everyone was yelling at me for reasons that weren't entirely my fault (or not at all). Anyway I was holding it together OK until a co-worker felt that something was wrong, so he came over and asked me "Are you OK?" That opened the floodgate and I sobbed for another 10 minutes. At least he wasn't my boss...

Now you wonder why I'm on this forum everyday.
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Old 03-19-2008, 10:58 PM   #16
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A lot of us cried at the company I worked for in 1980. It was a small, family run company. The company president was murdered. He was in his forties and left a wife and 3 young children. I had just started there in 1979 but many of the staff had known him for years.

It turned out that his brother had hired a hit man and had him killed.
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I Was A Cry-Baby
Old 03-20-2008, 11:08 AM   #17
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I Was A Cry-Baby

I cried once during a performance evaluation given by my boss in my first programming job. I must have felt he was unfair.

That was a long time ago. Over the years, stress and pressure affected me in other ways--lack of sleep, acne, weight gain, nightmares, but no more crying.

I used to cry more often in my personal life when I was younger. It's good to have a cry once in a while, and then when it's done I would feel a lot better.

I know I haven't gotten numb. Work and personal life are just a lot better for me now.

I do cry watching movies and reading books.

The last book that got me almost to tears was "The Heat is On" when I was reading about how one scientist was defamed by anti-global-warming skeptics (politicians, journalists, coal/oil lobbyists, scientists funded by coal and oil). I was thinking here's this innocent, hard-working scientist just doing his work--what does he know about media spin? It was like "Babe in the Woods" thrown to the wolves.

I can't remember the last movie that made me cry, though.
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Old 03-20-2008, 11:25 AM   #18
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Yes I have. Was in the hunt for recruiter of the year back in MI, and was so enraged when my bosses yelled at me for sticking around to complete an enlistment when I was sent home for medical reasons during an earlier med appointment. They flipped, I flipped...heated heated heated, nose to nose (I was an E5 - he was an E7!) teary yelling match...he stormed out, I finished the applicant's enlistment stuff, was home sick for next day or two...flash forward to end of fiscal year: made all of us look great - Zone, station, Non-Prior service & rookie recruiter of year....we still keep in touch!

And I have had a few male clients cry at my desk.
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Old 03-20-2008, 11:54 AM   #19
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Oops, I voted 'No', but I'm a male (typical of my sex, I failed to read the instructions before diving in!).

My wife, who I worked with for years, has cried a number of times at work, mostly due to stress or frustration.

When I was a manager, I had female employees cry in my office 3 or 4 times. It never made me uncomfortable, I just tried to empathize and let them talk it out. They always seemed slightly amazed that I didn't freak out on them.
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Old 03-20-2008, 11:56 AM   #20
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Yes I have. Was in the hunt for recruiter of the year back in MI, and was so enraged when my bosses yelled at me for sticking around to complete an enlistment when I was sent home for medical reasons during an earlier med appointment. They flipped, I flipped...heated heated heated, nose to nose (I was an E5 - he was an E7!) teary yelling match...he stormed out, I finished the applicant's enlistment stuff, was home sick for next day or two...flash forward to end of fiscal year: made all of us look great - Zone, station, Non-Prior service & rookie recruiter of year....we still keep in touch!

And I have had a few male clients cry at my desk.
I tons of respect for the recruiters in the service. Talk about a high stress job. That is one cut throat gig.
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