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Old 06-02-2011, 02:53 PM   #141
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So, M&M's, Baby Ruth, Skittles, Twix, 3 Musketeers, and 100,000 bars?
Oh my!
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Old 06-05-2011, 11:15 PM   #142
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Tough crowd. Having someone cheat on you is challenging, but harms you less than having her spend too much money, drink too much, get really fat, use cocaine, have lousy inlaws, get you involved in disputes, etc. Things change if she is unavailable or unloving to you.

One more good reason for a man to avoid marriage. If you aren't married and someone cheats, you and she can decide what you want to you, but you can't be punished by having her or him run off with the bankbook. In this state, you must remember to send her home to momma before she can spend 365 days under your roof.

Ha
I'm surprised that nobody in this whole thread has yet mentioned AIDS, even when the subject of cheating with prostitutes came up. Any time you have sex with someone, you also (from an epidemiological viewpoint) have sex with all of that person's previous partners. Staying married to someone who also has sex with other partners is nothing more nor less than Russian Roulette, played with viruses instead of bullets. If I ever had married and discovered my husband was unfaithful, and especially if he had cheated with prostitutes, I believe I would have left immediately. I can hardly imagine a greater breach of trust than marital infidelity which knowingly places your spouse at risk of infection with a fatal disease.
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Old 06-05-2011, 11:34 PM   #143
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(snip)I do not believe for a minute he forced her to perform oral sex because I personally don't see how a 62 year old man without a weapon can possibly force me to do oral sex. Even with his hands around my throat, I would bite where the sun doesn't shine until he drops to his knees.
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Force need not be physical. Think of the authority gradient between a world figure and an immigrant maid. (snip)
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(snip) It is very hard indeed for a 62 year old man without a weapon to force or command a female to perform oral sex. This woman is not a push over. She is a refugee survivor from one of the toughest parts of the world. I was not cultivated to be tough and yet I don't see how I can be persuaded to do this without the threat of death or violence and presumably no such thing occurred in this situation. (snip)
I too have not followed the details of the case, but one possibility that occurs to me is that the maid was threatened with being reported to the INS. ISTM that even the possibility of being sent back to "one of the toughest parts of the world" would have significant coercive power, and depending on the exact circumstances might even be "a threat of death or violence" if that is what she would be at risk of in her country of origin. Even supposing she is in the US legally, an INS investigation could put her livelihood at risk and make it harder for her to find another job if she lost the one she has now.
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Old 06-06-2011, 09:45 AM   #144
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Absolutely, and her daughter would have had to go back too.
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Old 06-06-2011, 06:55 PM   #145
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I am curious what the reaction people would have to a situation like Rep. Weiner and Weinergate, where you got your spouse sending sexual pictures to another person.

Clearly they have lusted/cheated in their heart, but would this situation be easier to forgive because there was no physical sex?
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Old 06-06-2011, 07:06 PM   #146
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I am curious what the reaction people would have to a situation like Rep. Weiner and Weinergate, where you got your spouse sending sexual pictures to another person.

Clearly they have lusted/cheated in their heart, but would this situation be easier to forgive because there was no physical sex?
Harder to forgive because it shows what a total moron the guy is.

Does anyone think that the media sex frontlines have become really really crazy lately? Wilber Mills and Fanny Fox were almost high class compared to these recent maniacs

How about Ryan Giggs, the Manchester United footballer who has been sleeping with his brothers wife for 8 years? Meanwhile he is married to his own pregnant wife, and having another fling with Imogen somebody. At first it said he is sleeping with Natasha Giggs, I thought-so? likely his wife. May be unusual for an ahtlete, but hardly tabloid fare.

Apparently I was wrong.

Ha
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Old 06-06-2011, 08:03 PM   #147
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I am curious what the reaction people would have to a situation like Rep. Weiner and Weinergate, where you got your spouse sending sexual pictures to another person.

Clearly they have lusted/cheated in their heart, but would this situation be easier to forgive because there was no physical sex?

I would think I had married a total idiot and I would probably put a lot of space between us .
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Old 06-06-2011, 08:06 PM   #148
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I think that it would be your first responsibility to try to understand and perhaps try to forgive. That may not work out as each story is different. It might take time and some outside help.

No standard answer in this case.
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Old 06-06-2011, 08:13 PM   #149
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With all the conversation this thread has attracted, I'm surprised that no one has considered that it is entirely possible that if a spouse cheated, he/she may not want to be forgiven. He/She may have enjoyed the experience and decided that he/she didn't want his/her old spouse anymore. It does happen that a person decides he/she is having a more enjoyable life with others than he/she had in the marriage.

Sometimes the cheated upon spouse doesn't have the opportunity to stay in the marriage, even if he/she is willing to forgive. But I suppose that is not really an answer to the original topic.
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Old 06-06-2011, 08:18 PM   #150
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Something tells me Weiner and his wife won't be celebrating their first anniversary together this July.
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Old 06-06-2011, 09:05 PM   #151
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I am curious what the reaction people would have to a situation like Rep. Weiner and Weinergate, where you got your spouse sending sexual pictures to another person.
Reminds me of the old joke, "Do you have any photos of your spouse naked?"

The deal-killer wouldn't necessarily be the sexting. It'd be the lying that goes along with it.
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Old 06-06-2011, 09:18 PM   #152
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Couldn't have happened to a more deserving guy.
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Old 06-06-2011, 09:24 PM   #153
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Old 06-06-2011, 09:28 PM   #154
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Something tells me Weiner and his wife won't be celebrating their first anniversary together this July.
Not even a weiner roast?
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Old 06-06-2011, 10:03 PM   #155
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Not even a weiner roast?

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Old 06-06-2011, 10:22 PM   #156
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They have been married less than a year. Where I his wife I would cut my losses and kick him to the curb. His behavior is sleazebag stuff, the maturity of a high school student and probably only one example of risk taking.

At one level I think that men who behave inappropriately are just getting caught more often because of the fact that women are tolerating less and/or technology makes them easier to catch. On another level I am coming to believe that some men over estimate their ability to 'catch and release' without consequences... risk takers.
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Old 06-06-2011, 10:46 PM   #157
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Where I his wife I would cut my losses and kick him to the curb. His behavior is sleazebag stuff, the maturity of a high school student and probably only one example of risk taking.
I'm sensing some ambivalence here... would you be able to more clearly express how you really feel?
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Old 06-07-2011, 12:28 AM   #158
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They have been married less than a year. Where I his wife I would cut my losses and kick him to the curb. His behavior is sleazebag stuff, the maturity of a high school student and probably only one example of risk taking.

At one level I think that men who behave inappropriately are just getting caught more often because of the fact that women are tolerating less and/or technology makes them easier to catch. On another level I am coming to believe that some men over estimate their ability to 'catch and release' without consequences... risk takers.
His wife Huma is lovely and Hillary Clinton's aide.


She obviously can do much better. If she foolishly does stick with him, I hope that her boss gives her lots of suggestion on how to get back at the SOB.

Frankly what is completely amazing to me is how a guy with the last name of Weiner did stuff this foolish. Hell even the least talent comedy writer can come up with a dozen jokes before lunch.
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Old 06-07-2011, 07:01 AM   #159
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Yeah I think Huma will be long gone a year from now. A lot of these guys (Clinton is another example) seem to have some kind of self destructive idiot thing going. Weiner added insult to injury by gratuitously noting that he told his wife about some of these activities before marrying her but she thought he was ending them.
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Old 06-07-2011, 09:20 AM   #160
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I would put Weiner's misdeeds in a different category...

He did not meet any of the ladies... he did not have sex with any of them (or at least that is what we hear)...

But, I did hear he talked to a few.... so who knows what would have happened if someone took the bait...


Being married less than a year, I would bet his wife will look for someone else... if they were married for 10 or 15 and had some kids, probably not...
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