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Old 09-09-2016, 07:39 AM   #341
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Aside from bribery being risky in itself, Apartment property managers have no power. They do keep records, so what are you bribing her to do? Falsify the record to say the tenant died and a new tenant was found?

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Since nobody has mentioned this yet - just bribe your property manager with a couple of hundred dollar bills in his/her pocket. I've got a feeling he/she will be willing to cut things short, as I'm assuming there will be no trouble re-renting your unit.

Even if the bribe needs to be $1000, you'll still be way ahead by getting out asap.

You've got choices and keeping to the status quo isn't the best one.
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Old 09-09-2016, 07:45 AM   #342
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I'm going to have to disagree with the posters who keep telling the OP to put more time and effort into breaking his lease. He has to pay money to live somewhere.
The OP has so many things to do and take care before his lease does expire next Spring. And to be honest, he's not much of a self-starter. And apparently is stressed out when he thinks about more then one task at a time.

My advice is just move on past the lease issue and focus on where he wants to go after the lease expires. This isn't an overnight decision for anybody and the OP has mentioned 2 places thousands of miles apart. A wrong decision here especially as a renter could cost lots of money as well. While he's doing that he should figure out his health insurance costs as the clock is ticking there as well.
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Old 09-09-2016, 01:53 PM   #343
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And apparently is stressed out when he thinks about more then one task at a time.

My advice is just move on past the lease issue and focus on where he wants to go after the lease expires. This isn't an overnight decision for anybody and the OP has mentioned 2 places thousands of miles apart. A wrong decision here especially as a renter could cost lots of money as well. While he's doing that he should figure out his health insurance costs as the clock is ticking there as well.
I suspect I have at least a touch of ADD and also find I work best focusing on one task at a time. We had to cut expenses for DH to retire, and doing one cost cutting project at a time worked best for us. I also see the two major items for Forced to Retire as health insurance followed by finding a suitable lower cost of living city and housing before the current lease runs out.
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Old 09-09-2016, 06:21 PM   #344
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I have to confess I'm not 100% convinced the OP is really looking for help/suggestions. If he is, then I guess he's one of those people who is "frozen into inaction" by being overwhelmed.
He made that list numerous posts back. He should chip away at those tasks. Not necessarily complete any one of them in a day, but at least make some definitive partial actions. If he did that, in very short order he'd have accomplished all of them.
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Old 09-09-2016, 06:24 PM   #345
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At this point I think the OP would do best to stay put thru the lease duration, find some part time or other non-long-term type employment (not enough to then go "ok well maybe i won't move) but enough to provide some reason to be up and out each day.

Focus the 7+ months on health and well-being, and planning, finding a new location. Take off 50lbs and 5 years very easily. Breaking the lease might be something he regrets - or something he will then use as an excuse "can't buy that condo because I broke that lease, ruined my credit" for years.

Consider the high rent of these next months as an investment in the future to get ducks in a row.
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Old 09-10-2016, 05:16 PM   #346
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Some thoughts....

Re-upping leases do not automatically go month to month... this is a regional thing. I've rented in 4 states and in Pennsylvania the leases renewed for 12 month periods. So you had to think long and hard about renewing if you wanted to make a change (like buy a house, or change locations.) Sometimes clauses were added to allow for specific lease breaking conditions (purchase of a home, job relo)... sometimes not. I suspect VA is similar to PA in this respect.

OP - the advice to start downsizing/prepping for your move at the end of your lease is GOOD advice. Make a commitment to get rid of 1 box of stuff per day. You can sell stuff on ebay or craigslist to help with cash flow. Donate or dump the rest. Get down to the point where you can move into a small 1 br. This will put you in the right mindset to make a move at the end of your lease.

Another GOOD advice given was to find some "gig" jobs... Bringing in income helps you reduce your withdrawal rate. It can also add to your SS earnings which will help you when you start collecting. The dog walking suggestion has a double benefit of improving your fitness while you earn cash. One of my son's friend's mom walks dogs and she's able to afford her apartment here in San Diego and live decently. She uses nextdoor.com to get clients... and now has a great number of regulars. Her rent is similar to yours (San Diego is as expensive as Alexandria) and she feeds a teenage boy to boot. (Teenagers eat a LOT!)

And it was GREAT advice to suggest you learn to live cheap - super cheap. I'd be exploring ways to eat for less (beans and rice are our friends - and healthy too!), need new clothes - check out thrift stores, need a book - use the library. There are a lot of ways to cut back on spending/consumption.

As for the lease breaking.... BTDT... I had a property manager lie to me when I rented my apartment in PA. They told me I could break the lease for purchase of a house or for job relocation. I would not have rented without that assurance. When I bought my house, I went to the rental office and they said I'd need to provide a copy of the home sales contract... I did. They then told me I still couldn't break the lease. I moved anyway. They contacted me after (since they had the sales contract they had my new address.) I consulted a lawyer. The lawyer said it could go either way... The landlords (big corporate landlords) offered me a deal - I pay an extra month rent and eat the deposit and we'd be clear. The apartment was only vacant 1 month - so basically they re-rented and were able to keep the deposit. But - they didn't have to offer the deal, and I wasn't worried about my credit since I'd already closed on my house. I don't think I took a hit on my credit, though.

I have empathy for the situation you're in. But you need to take action on decluttering, finding a gig job, and cutting your expenses. These are all doable.
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Old 09-10-2016, 05:32 PM   #347
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Rodi has some awesome advice. Two builds on what was said:
- If you have cable TV, watch Tiny House Hunters - it will inspire you on how little people are able to live with.
- on the food subject, soup is a cheap alternative as well. With an Instant Pot and blender you can make some great soups with cheap ingredients.

On a side note, I think there is a thread on here about frugality that had some awesome suggestions as well.
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Old 09-10-2016, 08:14 PM   #348
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Rodi has some awesome advice. Two builds on what was said:
- If you have cable TV, watch Tiny House Hunters - it will inspire you on how little people are able to live with.
- on the food subject, soup is a cheap alternative as well. With an Instant Pot and blender you can make some great soups with cheap ingredients.

On a side note, I think there is a thread on here about frugality that had some awesome suggestions as well.
I love my instant pot. Today I made home made soup in it.

The number one way we cut our grocery bill was by simply changing where we shop. A local outlet store and 99 cent store have prices half or less that the big retail store for the exact same food, same name brands and lots of fresh produce. The local ethnic stores also have much lower prices for fresher looking produce.
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Old 09-10-2016, 10:39 PM   #349
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Originally Posted by rodi View Post
Some thoughts....

Re-upping leases do not automatically go month to month... this is a regional thing. I've rented in 4 states and in Pennsylvania the leases renewed for 12 month periods. So you had to think long and hard about renewing if you wanted to make a change (like buy a house, or change locations.) Sometimes clauses were added to allow for specific lease breaking conditions (purchase of a home, job relo)... sometimes not. I suspect VA is similar to PA in this respect.

/snip/
From what I understand, you cannot enforce an automatic renewal in a contract... my old boss would usually make people take them out, but if they did not he really did not care... in the 6 years I worked there a couple of companies would call and argue about it, but when I told them the 'law' they stopped calling...



Decided to look it up... AND.... it really just depends... some states allow it, some don't.... some are mixed...
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Old 09-11-2016, 04:39 AM   #350
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I have to confess I'm not 100% convinced the OP is really looking for help/suggestions. If he is, then I guess he's one of those people who is "frozen into inaction" by being overwhelmed.
He made that list numerous posts back. He should chip away at those tasks. Not necessarily complete any one of them in a day, but at least make some definitive partial actions. If he did that, in very short order he'd have accomplished all of them.
+1
Yes this.
Many people are talkers, fewer are doers. Have known many people in my life, that once they have talked about something, starting a new business, designing a new product, making a change in their life, etc, they are fine and finished. The talking seems to be as satisfying as doing, and the doing actually takes guts and effort! Excuses are always made so nothing actually ever gets done. Have read this thread from the beginning, and some of the others he has posted, for whatever reason it seems he is not a doer type. Sorry to be so blunt. One can point out solutions, but really it is his life. I wish him well.
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Old 09-12-2016, 09:43 AM   #351
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UPDATE:

After many phone calls that were not returned to the corporate office of the big property management company that owns my apartment, I finally got a hold of someone. He kept saying over and over and over again, how I should work with the apartment manager. I was forced to say over and over and over and OVER again that I had no where with the property manager at my actual complex. Finally, after much discussion, I worked out an arrangement where I could live here for only three more months and then pay for the apartment for one more month month empty. They said they can't put it up for rent until it is empty. They have to clean it, and update the kitchen, etc.

Not a perfect arrangement, but now I get to keep my perfect credit rating and a good rental reference. Though better than waiting for the full eight months left on my lease.

So, now I have three months to prepare to move, to a smaller town with a low cost of living.
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Old 09-12-2016, 09:53 AM   #352
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good luck!
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Old 09-12-2016, 10:04 AM   #353
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Use that 3 months wisely, drop 30 lbs and 5 years and life will feel much better to you. You can walk and stretch today, do it.
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Old 09-12-2016, 10:05 AM   #354
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That is awesome--it would take me three months to get my plans made and in action. Keep us posted!
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Old 09-12-2016, 10:07 AM   #355
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Originally Posted by Forced to Retire View Post
UPDATE:.................So, now I have three months to prepare to move, to a smaller town with a low cost of living.
Good for you! That will save you a bunch of money and give you a little time to prepare.
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Old 09-12-2016, 10:08 AM   #356
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Way to go.
Get it in writing so they can't back out in 3 months time.
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Old 09-12-2016, 10:10 AM   #357
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Originally Posted by Forced to Retire View Post
UPDATE:

After many phone calls that were not returned to the corporate office of the big property management company that owns my apartment, I finally got a hold of someone. He kept saying over and over and over again, how I should work with the apartment manager. I was forced to say over and over and over and OVER again that I had no where with the property manager at my actual complex. Finally, after much discussion, I worked out an arrangement where I could live here for only three more months and then pay for the apartment for one more month month empty. They said they can't put it up for rent until it is empty. They have to clean it, and update the kitchen, etc.

Not a perfect arrangement, but now I get to keep my perfect credit rating and a good rental reference. Though better than waiting for the full eight months left on my lease.

So, now I have three months to prepare to move, to a smaller town with a low cost of living.
Congratulations! I am very happy for you. It would have been very, very difficult for me to break a lease even in your circumstance, so I am glad that the management was willing to negotiate. Your persistence paid off. I would make sure and get this in writing (if you haven't already), so the local office understands the amendment to your current lease agreement.
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Old 09-12-2016, 10:52 AM   #358
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That is fantastic that you were able to negotiate a change in your lease. Get it in writing!

Now--I have been a yo-yo with weight and fitness. We finally have amazing weather. No matter what else you do, get out and take a walk.

We have many overweight friends and family. I'm overweight now. I've lost weight several times, but it always creeps up to my genetic set point. Many people have been a bit insulting about your weight. Oh well. Ignore them. Too many here have a holier-than-though attitude. Yes, they are proud of themselves. But all you have to do is look at a family to know that weight and metabolism has a huge genetic component.

My dad who smoke and drank and never exercised, lived until 80. Yet a friend's husband died at age 42 of "athlete's heart". He was a runner and a tennis instructor. One of my mentors in residency died on his morning run as well.

There is a lot of great advise on frugal living here. The idea of a roommate is a good one. Our single, 61 year old Silicon Valley best friend has taken in a housemate. It works out very well for them. And there are cheap and healthy ways to eat. I like making bean and veggie soups for lunch. I make a bunch and freeze some of it in small pots. Then take the frozen soup out of the pot by catching it in my hand while running water over the pot upside down and seal in plastic bags. To reheat, just pop it in the original small pot. I doctor soup with dill, Louisiana hot sauce, or a spoonful of nonfat yogurt depending on my mood.

I sympathize with all who have struggled with weight, as I have. DS, DH eat way worse than I do and they are thin. And I get more exercise too.

So take a walk. Go a little farther than you think you can. Keep doing it regularly and there will be positive results. Mentally and physically.

Who knows? During your walks you might figure out a part time low stress job you can do that helps pay a few of the bills and get you out of the house a few days a week.

Good luck and keep posting. I've enjoyed your posts.


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Old 09-12-2016, 11:07 AM   #359
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Great News!

Celebrate the wins (that's important) -- but also try to maintain the momentum.

Retirement or a change can be really great once you have the right mindset about it. It is the mental transition that can be the tough part.

I use to have much fear about things prior to my ER. Luckily for me, this has dissipated since then.

My DW often mentions to be, when I am anxious about something, to remember the quote attributed to Mark Twain: "I have lived through some awful things in my life, a few of them have even actually happened".


YOU GO Forced!

-gauss
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Old 09-12-2016, 11:09 AM   #360
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You can walk and stretch today, do it.
This.
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