Anyone else here forced to retire and scared to death?

[Forced to Retire]

I think the poster below has pretty much figured me out. Good job.

I have always been an outsider and an eccentric. While I spent the majority of my time in Corporate America working in conservative offices with formal bland people who did not get me, I wonder if it was the right thing for me. At times I made great money and some of my bosses loved me. But other stuffed shirts did not know how to interact with me and felt that my eccentric approach to life was a threat to them and the organization.

I made lots of money for a number of years by hiding my eccentric personality and through hard work and creativity. But as I got older, it became harder to accept corporate normal. It is painful to be someone your not and try to figure out how others want you to be.

That is the great thing about retirement. I won't have to spend all day being with the corporate stuffed shirts. I can spend my days with my self and people who appreciate me.

I just have to survive the year and get out of my lease. Which I signed shortly after losing my job. (Why? I thought I would be rehired in a month.)

(On that front I am meeting with an attorney who understands real estate law next week.) This after being told by every one at my apartment there is no way to get out of my lease. (No sublet, no putting the apartment on the market, no two month notice, no, no, no!)

I don't know the OP, so this is just an observation that may be entirely off the mark:
- If we've worked in a large office, we've worked with somebody that was clearly benefiting from a special, niche situation. Everybody else on the team might wonder how "Bob" ended up in that job, making a lot of money but maybe not fitting in with the other members of the team. Most would have agreed that "Bob" would be unlikely to find such a good situation again, for whatever reason. Maybe "Bob" suspected that, too, but maybe not. But to be "Bob" and actually lose the job and find out, for sure, that you're really not a "$100K guy" (because no one will hire you at that pay), well, that's a kick in the gut. If I were "Bob", it would probably take awhile for reality to set in, and when it did I wouldn't feel very good about myself (reduction of self-regard, regret for poor resource decisions made in the past when things were rosy, etc). These feelings would be more serious if the job was really most of what my self-worth was dependent upon (no consuming hobbies, not a social animal, few family ties). I might be shell-shocked for awhile.
So, enough groundless analysis.
Sooner or later the OP is going to hit some situation that prompts him to act. It might be the realization right now that he's burning through assets quickly and he needs to act, as each day the boat that needs to take him to social security and beyond (his savings) takes on more water. Or, he may wait and defer dealing with the situation for a long time---clearly he could continue to pay his present rent and live as he has been for three more years, then he'll have no resources, be evicted, and then he'll take action. I think taking action right now will do two things: 1) Stop the resource hemorrhaging and allow him a better quality of life 2) Benefit him emotionally by directing his thoughts and energies in a positive direction. Fixing his situation becomes his new "work," and getting his ship in order will provide a sense of personal satisfaction that is probably lacking right now. But, only the OP can take choose which path to take.

 

[38Chevy454]

Talking with the attorney next week is good. Ensure that you emphasize you are out of work, and staying in the apt will have negative consequence on your future financial well-being. I think the attorney may have some ideas that can help your situation, look forward to hearing your reply back on this.

Depending on the outcome of the attorney mtg, you should look more into some type job income. Unless the attorney says bail now and move before end of Sept to lower COL, even 2-3 months of some income will help offset your money hemorrhaging you are in now.

 

[pb4uski]

.....(On that front I am meeting with an attorney who understands real estate law next week.) This after being told by every one at my apartment there is no way to get out of my lease. (No sublet, no putting the apartment on the market, no two month notice, no, no, no!)

Of course they are going to tell you no... the longer you stay and keep paying the rent the easier their job is. Have you stopped paying rent? That would make their decision to compromise with you easier for them, but as long as you keep paying the rent there is no incentive for them to do anything for you. Is your building in demand? Any vacancies?

Have you informed them that when you leave that they have a duty under the law to rent the place to mitigate your damages and that you and your attorney intend to hold them to that?

You're being too soft. The only language people like your management company understand is hardball.

If you have not already paid your rent for September, hold off until you meet with the attorney. If you paid it or the check hasn't cleared your bank, stop payment on it until you have met with the attorney. The fact that they know you are unhappy along with the late payment/stopped payment will get their attention that you are serious. At the least, make a call to the attorney and ask if you should hold off on paying the September rent until after you meet.

BTW, there is nothing wrong with being eccentric.... as I am prone to say... we are all strange in our own special ways... some more than others.

 

[Llep]

I wish you the best of luck. You are in difficult circumstances and have some hard choices to make. You have come here and shared some very personal information about yourself and taken some very blunt criticism with grace. Good luck in Richmond. I spent 10 years there and went to school there and lived in the Fan District and if I could redo one thing in my life I would have never left that city. I have had a lot of adventures but never felt the happiness and sense of belonging that I did as a young college kid in the Fan trying to figure out the world. I hope Richmond is as magical a place for you as it was for me.

 

[photoguy]

I recently broke my lease in San Diego in order to move into a condo. I gave less than a week's notice. California is a duty to mitigate state as is Virginia. What this means is that the landlord cannot just collect rent on an empty apartment, they need to re-rent the unit (as others have brought up in this thread).

The landlord doesn't have to relax their screening standards and can list the unit at the market rate.

In my case, the landlord raised the rent 7% (10% annualized) and relisted the unit immediately. The increase is more than the average for SD (3%) but the unit was not clearly above market rates. It makes sense for the landlord to raise the rent as much as possible while still being justifiable as "market rate".

San Diego right now is running a sub 3% vacancy rate. My unit re-rented in 3 weeks. It probably would have re-rented in days if they kept the same rate on my lease.

I'm not sure what the vacancy rate is in alexandria but due to proximity to DC I imagine that it would be low. But it shouldn't be too hard to find vacancy rates and average time to re-rent.

In theory the landlord could have also charged me expenses for re-renting the unit (i.e. time to show it to tenants, advertising, etc) but they did not. I got back all of my security deposit less $40 for a carpet cleaning.

 

[ivinsfan]

I recently broke my lease in San Diego in order to move into a condo. I gave less than a week's notice. California is a duty to mitigate state as is Virginia. What this means is that the landlord cannot just collect rent on an empty apartment, they need to re-rent the unit (as others have brought up in this thread).

The landlord doesn't have to relax their screening standards and can list the unit at the market rate.

In my case, the landlord raised the rent 7% (10% annualized) and relisted the unit immediately. The increase is more than the average for SD (3%) but the unit was not clearly above market rates. It makes sense for the landlord to raise the rent as much as possible while still being justifiable as "market rate".

San Diego right now is running a sub 3% vacancy rate. My unit re-rented in 3 weeks. It probably would have re-rented in days if they kept the same rate on my lease.

I'm not sure what the vacancy rate is in alexandria but due to proximity to DC I imagine that it would be low. But it shouldn't be too hard to find vacancy rates and average time to re-rent.

In theory the landlord could have also charged me expenses for re-renting the unit (i.e. time to show it to tenants, advertising, etc) but they did not. I got back all of my security deposit less $40 for a carpet cleaning.

That's a good ending but I no longer thinks the OP wants to hear stories about how to break a lease. I think no matter what he says, he's content to ride it out, especially since he threw in the detail that he re-signed his lease after he lost his job.

 

[MichaelB]

I recently broke my lease in San Diego in order to move into a condo. I gave less than a week's notice. California is a duty to mitigate state as is Virginia. What this means is that the landlord cannot just collect rent on an empty apartment, they need to re-rent the unit (as others have brought up in this thread).

The landlord doesn't have to relax their screening standards and can list the unit at the market rate.

In my case, the landlord raised the rent 7% (10% annualized) and relisted the unit immediately. The increase is more than the average for SD (3%) but the unit was not clearly above market rates. It makes sense for the landlord to raise the rent as much as possible while still being justifiable as "market rate".

San Diego right now is running a sub 3% vacancy rate. My unit re-rented in 3 weeks. It probably would have re-rented in days if they kept the same rate on my lease.

I'm not sure what the vacancy rate is in alexandria but due to proximity to DC I imagine that it would be low. But it shouldn't be too hard to find vacancy rates and average time to re-rent.

In theory the landlord could have also charged me expenses for re-renting the unit (i.e. time to show it to tenants, advertising, etc) but they did not. I got back all of my security deposit less $40 for a carpet cleaning.

OP reports that yearly increases are high - 10% - and other members confirm that OP lives in a high COL area. It's reasonable to assume that the landlord would have no difficulty in both increasing the monthly rent and getting a new tenant.

 

[photoguy]

He mentioned scheduling a meeting with a real estate lawyer so I thought it might be still on the table. If not maybe it will interest someone else reading.

 

[ivinsfan]

He mentioned scheduling a meeting with a real estate lawyer so I thought it might be still on the table. If not maybe it will interest someone else reading.

That he did, so he apparently is going to let things ride until he can pay someone to help figure things out. He never said he did anything other then ask to be released from his lease.

 

[pb4uski]

Debbie Downer alert!

 

[Aerides]

OP good - talk to that lawyer and get options, maybe you can't get out tomorrow, but 8 months gives you a lot of room to negotiate.

No matter how it works out, in 8 days 8 weeks or 8 months, you are out of that apt. That's a short term problem.

Your next is to focus on your health: you say you are 300lbs? You can easily be 250 or less at the end of that lease. Go for a 30 minute walk every morning and evening, and look at your grocery budget - you'll save and lose at the same time!

Then, general employment attitude. A great many of us who planned and worked to ER did so for many of the reasons you mention: didn't feel we had a fit with corporate culture, etc. You are far from unique there. But we played the game, faked it, and put on work personas, for years and years because a paycheck moved toward the goal, whereas expressing our eccentric life outlook in the workplace would not be a means to that end. Everyone is a special snowflake, but be smart enough that no one really wants to hire one. Play the game.

Lease or no lease, move at the end of it, but you probably don't want to consider yourself retired just get. Finding even part time work for a few years at a reduced COL and you could find you can defer SS to 65 instead of 62, and that would mean a larger SS.

 

[Yarnstormer]

You can move to georgia - it's possible to get a small house or 2 br condo for $60-100,000 and of course there are affordable rentals. I see older folks working at the grocery stores and other retails establishments all the time.
I did not realize ones income could be too low for Obamacare. Does all income count?


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[Yarnstormer]

http://www.zillow.com/homedetails/14217190_zpid

My Area has tons of affordable condos that would be suitable for a frugal retirement. This one is in a very nice area.


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[Teacher Terry]

Basically the OP wants to complain but does not want to take any action to change his situation. I had a friend that did this very same thing and waited until he was broke and going to be homeless. Then he asked me and some of his other friends if he could couch surf between us-ugh-no! It is sad when grown adults can't make decisions in their own best interests but continue to do what is destroying them financially. I agree with the posters who said he will probably renew his lease. He wants someone to wave a magic wand and make things better. Good luck with that!

 

[Sunset]

Basically the OP wants to complain but does not want to take any action to change his situation. I had a friend that did this very same thing and waited until he was broke and going to be homeless. Then he asked me and some of his other friends if he could couch surf between us-ugh-no! It is sad when grown adults can't make decisions in their own best interests but continue to do what is destroying them financially. I agree with the posters who said he will probably renew his lease. He wants someone to wave a magic wand and make things better. Good luck with that!

+1

Have I been a little harsh on OP, AFTER I gave him a bunch of posts of improvements to make, absolutely yes !

Thank you all for pointing out how terrible I have been.

I also lost a great job, where I was well paid, the boss said I was highest paid in dept, but not the highest in the company.
Sure I was in shock, pissed off, etc for about 2 months.
Then I cut my hair, dyed it, dressed well, and busted my butt to look for jobs and do interviews, taking the first job offer I got.
Sure it was 1.5 hr commute each way, including walking 10 blocks, and paid easily 20% less.
But a lot better than sitting in the park thinking I'm too good for corporate America.

I do hope OP works it out, but it really only matters for him.

 

[travelover]

............Then, general employment attitude. A great many of us who planned and worked to ER did so for many of the reasons you mention: didn't feel we had a fit with corporate culture, etc. You are far from unique there. But we played the game, faked it, and put on work personas, for years and years because a paycheck moved toward the goal, whereas expressing our eccentric life outlook in the workplace would not be a means to that end. .............

Good point and one that I can connect with. I think that we are all somewhere on that spectrum of eccentricity, but I can sympathize with the OP, even if I might have been a little less an outsider. It is hard on the psyche to have to fake it every day.

 

[Teacher Terry]

Just like Sunset I have been through some tough times both emotionally and financially in my life. It is human nature to feel sorry for yourself but then you need to get it together. Teaching is my semi-retired job. Before that I helped people with disabilities return to work. I was very empathetic but also at times did some reality counseling with people who were stuck and refusing to look at all their options, etc. There is nothing wrong with taking a survival job to make ends meet. All work has value. Sometimes a lower level job leads to something much better when you have proven yourself.

 

[ER Eddie]

I have always been an outsider and an eccentric. While I spent the majority of my time in Corporate America working in conservative offices with formal bland people who did not get me, I wonder if it was the right thing for me. At times I made great money and some of my bosses loved me. But other stuffed shirts did not know how to interact with me and felt that my eccentric approach to life was a threat to them and the organization.

I made lots of money for a number of years by hiding my eccentric personality and through hard work and creativity. But as I got older, it became harder to accept corporate normal. It is painful to be someone your not and try to figure out how others want you to be.

That is the great thing about retirement. I won't have to spend all day being with the corporate stuffed shirts. I can spend my days with my self and people who appreciate me.

That's right, and that's a good way to look at it. Retirement means you are free to be yourself. Be as weird as you like. Stop trying to pass as normal. Hang out with people you want to hang out with, rather than people you're compelled to be with.

 

[haha]

Be as weird as you like. Stop trying to pass as normal. Hang out with people you want to hang out with, rather than people you're compelled to be with.

Especially if you can pay your way. Otherwise, who pays the piper calls the tune.

Ha

 

[HFWR]

Rent a truck, preferably on Sunday, when the apartment's office is closed. Load up your stuff, drop off the key (Lee) in the late rent payment slot, and disappear. Done!

 

[haha]

Rent a truck, preferably on Sunday, when the apartment's office is closed. Load up your stuff, drop off the key (Lee) in the late rent payment slot, and disappear. Done!

I did something like this years ago in Boston. THE funniest part is that 6 months later it turned out that the same large, local owners owned both the place I left, and the place I landed, 8 to 10 blocks away. I received a few registered letters which I ignored, and later found a nicer small triplex with a non-corporate owner to move into.

In central Boston burglaries tended to be my signal to move to another spot. But I traveled light, so it was not much trouble.

Ha

 

[Texas Proud]

Basically the OP wants to complain but does not want to take any action to change his situation. I had a friend that did this very same thing and waited until he was broke and going to be homeless. Then he asked me and some of his other friends if he could couch surf between us-ugh-no! It is sad when grown adults can't make decisions in their own best interests but continue to do what is destroying them financially. I agree with the posters who said he will probably renew his lease. He wants someone to wave a magic wand and make things better. Good luck with that!

Yes, and it can happen to anybody that does not take action...

I did not know the guy, but one day when I was working at mega there was a bit of news that hit a number of coworkers... seemed that someone they had worked with (who made good money BTW) and had been let go had died... he was in his early 50s... seems that he could not get another job... but kept spending as if nothing happened... ran out of money... was evicted... was living in the street, literally... started to drink... someone found his body in a ditch along a road... never heard why he died, but it was not being killed or hit by a car, so natural causes...

OP probably will not get this low.... but I can see him burning through his savings and then living off his SS.... doing the things that he thinks is so sad such as library or shopping malls...

 

[Sasset]

There are places in Florida where you can get a condo in 55 community or even a house for less $60,000. I know, I have relatives that have bought them. Lots of things to do, too. Community, state, and national parks as well.

 

[2035]

I have to wonder how dumb was OP to rent such an expensive apt. .

Geez Sunset, you've made your point several times over. Stop berating OP. Yes, he's made a lot of mistakes and he has more power than he realizes or is willing to accept, but now you're just being rude and kicking sand in OP's face.


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[travelover]

Geez Sunset, you've made your point several times over. Stop berating OP. Yes, he's made a lot of mistakes and he has more power than he realizes or is willing to accept, but now you're just being rude and kicking sand OP's face.

+1