Join Early Retirement Today
Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Re: Anyone started a marriage while FI
Old 01-25-2006, 10:42 PM   #21
 
Posts: n/a
Re: Anyone started a marriage while FI

You guys aren't married, you are Room Mates.

Why bother with Pre Nups, you really don't have committment, either can walk at any time?

Most people move beyond this stage, but Hey , if it works for you guys, go for it.

Children are obviously not part of the equation?
__________________
  Reply With Quote
Join the #1 Early Retirement and Financial Independence Forum Today - It's Totally Free!

Are you planning to be financially independent as early as possible so you can live life on your own terms? Discuss successful investing strategies, asset allocation models, tax strategies and other related topics in our online forum community. Our members range from young folks just starting their journey to financial independence, military retirees and even multimillionaires. No matter where you fit in you'll find that Early-Retirement.org is a great community to join. Best of all it's totally FREE!

You are currently viewing our boards as a guest so you have limited access to our community. Please take the time to register and you will gain a lot of great new features including; the ability to participate in discussions, network with our members, see fewer ads, upload photographs, create a retirement blog, send private messages and so much, much more!

Re: Anyone started a marriage while FI
Old 01-25-2006, 10:58 PM   #22
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Sheryl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 1,459
Re: Anyone started a marriage while FI

Well, I never had such great sex with any of my previous roomates, but I get your point.*

And you are correct, there is no point in a pre-nup without a marriage.* But after spending 20 years of non-marriage in my previous relationship, he considered trying to sue me for support when I kicked him out.* * Apparently the grounds were going to be that he had been freeloading for so long that he had developed an entitlement to my money.

It is true in my current relationship that either of us could walk away at any time.* But I don't really see the institution of marriage stopping that from happening to couples all around me.*

To answer your question - no kids are invovled -other than SO's 25 year old son from previous marriage.* Part of the reason for keeping our finances somewhat separate would be that he wants his assets to go to his son,* I have other plans for where my estate ends up.
__________________

__________________
Sheryl is offline   Reply With Quote
Re: Anyone started a marriage while FI
Old 01-26-2006, 07:58 AM   #23
Recycles dryer sheets
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Posts: 67
Re: Anyone started a marriage while FI

My significant other and myself have been together for over twenty years without the benefit of a marriage certificate.* Why?* We never had children, and couldn't stomach the idea of paying the tax marriage penalty.* We'll get married when it makes financial sense.* We do have wills, powers-of-attorney etc in case there is some unforseen problem.*

Just because we aren't married,* doesn't mean we aren't a committed couple.* We've seen each other through some pretty rough times.* I know of several marriages where the partners don't suport each other at all.* In my opinion, it's the relationship, not the marriage certificate, that is important.*
__________________
Sue is offline   Reply With Quote
Re: Anyone started a marriage while FI
Old 01-26-2006, 08:47 AM   #24
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Sheryl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 1,459
Re: Anyone started a marriage while FI

Thank you Sue. That's what I was TRYING to say.
__________________
Sheryl is offline   Reply With Quote
Re: Anyone started a marriage while FI
Old 01-26-2006, 10:08 AM   #25
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Posts: 2,083
Re: Anyone started a marriage while FI

I have stated my opinion in past threads.

I am single (never married) and retired. If I ever got married (fairtales can come true ....) I would get a pre-nup because I am just too naive and therefore, somewhat cautious. 8)
The fear of being a permanent fixture at Walwart until 95, sends shivers down my spine.

If I ever get married and and several weeks later disappear from this forum, send out the hounds and look for a freshly dug mound with a body and old bicycle in it. Paranoid, I don't think so.

MJ
__________________
I look to the present moment because that's where I live my life.
MJ is offline   Reply With Quote
Re: Anyone started a marriage while FI
Old 01-26-2006, 10:54 AM   #26
Full time employment: Posting here.
bosco's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Posts: 987
Re: Anyone started a marriage while FI

I was divorced in 1994 at age 41. Since I had an "extended youth", I didn't really start my career until age 31 (I sort of RE'd at age 21 for a while....'nother story). My ex got 56% in the settlement, I got 44%. The lawyer claimed that 50-50 was fair, but it would cost more to get it than simply to let her get the long straw (yes, I had 50% custody of the kids, so that wasn't the basis of the uneven split). At that time, my share of the net worth after leaving the marriage was somewhere around $125,000.

I remarried in 1998. While I looked at each of our assets prior to getting married, (I had about 60% to her 40% in terms of what we brought to the marriage), I decided not to get a prenup. Now that it is 8 years later, I do not regret the decision. We have bought houses, sold houses, developed lots, basically everything we have now is comingled.

We now are worth about $1m, not impressive for our age, but considering where we were both at in 1996, we are doing quite well. We expect to RE in 2 years, in large part due to good pensions which will keep the pressure off our nest egg for a good many years.

My comment: I see love as a decision and a committment one makes rather than an emotion that happens to a person. Compatibility and attraction are obviously important. But, the person you marry likely represents the most important financial decision you will ever make--you are selecting a long-term business partner. If that sounds cold, sorry. But I have seen too many people with spouses off at the casinos pi$$ing away money, or snorting it up their nose.

The wife I have is a good earner, fairly frugal, and a hard worker. My first wife, well, never mind. If I had been a little smarter about who I married the first time, I would have been able to RE a while ago. No regrets--I have two great sons. But certainly a large consideration.
__________________
I have an inferiority complex, but it's not a very good one.
bosco is offline   Reply With Quote
Re: Anyone started a marriage while FI
Old 01-26-2006, 11:49 AM   #27
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
HFWR's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Lawn chair in Texas
Posts: 12,964
Re: Anyone started a marriage while FI

Ditto... Well, mostly...
__________________
Have Funds, Will Retire

...not doing anything of true substance...
HFWR is offline   Reply With Quote
Re: Anyone started a marriage while FI
Old 01-26-2006, 12:25 PM   #28
Recycles dryer sheets
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Posts: 183
Re: Anyone started a marriage while FI

Got married in 98 WITH pre-nup at age 43. I had virtually all the assets, DW had little. She had three kids two at home.I had just bought house 3/4 paid for. Wife sold hers, kept her gains. (not a lot) We lived together a year before we got married. We talked about our goals and our fears. I was afraid of losing my assets in a divorce. She did not want to sell her house and move in with me without being married. We went to a lawyer who drew it up, basically, our assets are frozen in 98 , what we had prior stays ours, and after was joint. And it is in effect for ten years. Retired in 04, wife still works (her choice). We have separate checking for personal stuff and joint checking for bills, separate IRAs. Just as I know I can't predict the stock market, I knew I could not predict how our marriage work work out, after all something like 50% fail. Turns out we are still happy, right now it looks like it's death till we part. I don't regret getting it, and it has not caused problems. I don't know if we would have gotten married without it, so it just may have kept us together.....shredder
__________________
Shredder is offline   Reply With Quote
Re: Anyone started a marriage while FI
Old 01-26-2006, 01:30 PM   #29
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
SteveR's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Posts: 2,803
Re: Anyone started a marriage while FI

I don't see any posts here from anybody that had to actually USE a prenup.*

Anyone?* Anyone?* Bueller?




__________________
Work? I don't have time to work....I'm retired.
SteveR is offline   Reply With Quote
Re: Anyone started a marriage while FI
Old 01-26-2006, 04:58 PM   #30
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Posts: 2,083
Re: Anyone started a marriage while FI

Quote:
Originally Posted by bosco
But I have seen too many people with spouses off at the casinos pi$$ing away money, or snorting it up their nose.
Very funny movie "Lost in America" with Albert Brooks and Julie Hagerty about a young couple ERing in a Winnabago and while passing through Las Vegas, his wife loses their total nest egg gambling.
__________________

__________________
I look to the present moment because that's where I live my life.
MJ is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Does anyone know anything common law marriage? accountingsucks FIRE and Money 35 08-21-2006 09:51 PM
Making marriage last Martha Other topics 105 07-22-2006 07:52 AM
Is there a way search for post only by the poster's name & topics they started? dex Forum Admin 5 03-25-2006 01:16 PM
ER, marriage, and community property states Peter Other topics 5 04-17-2004 04:50 AM

 

 
All times are GMT -6. The time now is 07:59 AM.
 
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.