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Old 03-18-2009, 01:22 PM   #61
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The last 2 years I posted a flyer in the teachers break room at the school "Lake House Vacation Rental" ... this brought a few comments to DW like "your independently wealthy" blah, blah, blah. So we'll skip the flyer this year; also never got any hits so that makes it easy.
I would have thought that posted in a teachers break room at a school, the response would have been that "you're independently wealthy," etc.
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Old 03-18-2009, 01:27 PM   #62
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I would have thought that posted in a teachers break room at a school, the response would have been that "you're independently wealthy," etc.
And I would have thought that someone writing a reply like that would have considered saying, "... in a teachers' break room..." .
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Old 03-18-2009, 01:48 PM   #63
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Define "rich". I'm not sure I qualify.
If rich means being comepletely debt free (no mortgage) and hundreds of thousands in the bank, and hundreds of thousands in investments, and low monthly cost of living, then I'm rich. The low monthly cost of living is what allows me to stay under the radar.

Oh ya, I too have holes in my underwear. As long the skivys keep my boys in place, they are still good.
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Old 03-18-2009, 02:00 PM   #64
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It's not just that private sector employees *wanted* to keep their salary secret, though I'm sure some did. Most private sector employers generally forbid employees from discussing salary, with disciplinary action up to and including termination for those who don't comply.
Yeah, they didn't want you to know the new hire, that you are training, is making 30K more than you.
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Old 03-18-2009, 02:18 PM   #65
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We decided to downsize and move, but still ended up with a large home on the bay near the ocean.
Ooo wee....sounds like a great place for an ER forum party!
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Old 03-18-2009, 02:45 PM   #66
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It's not just that private sector employees *wanted* to keep their salary secret, though I'm sure some did. Most private sector employers generally forbid employees from discussing salary, with disciplinary action up to and including termination for those who don't comply.
Even in government, discussing someone's pay (even your own) is not something that one would do in front of management. Even though everyone's pay is available on the internet, discussing it is thought to foster resentment and discontent. There might not be direct disciplinary action, but it could conceivably have indirect effects on one's performance evaluation.
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Yeah, they didn't want you to know the new hire, that you are training, is making 30K more than you.
BTDT, didn't like it a bit! But now I'm glad because after a couple of years she became my supervisor - - and I have my promotion to her level, plus her respect, and I don't have to deal with supervising. She wasn't the cause of the problem, as it was a new job for her.
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Old 03-18-2009, 02:48 PM   #67
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Yeah, they didn't want you to know the new hire, that you are training, is making 30K more than you.
No kidding. This was especially true toward the end of the Internet Bubble when techies were in demand. A friend of mine somehow came into a spreadsheet with all of my group's planned offers, so it made my own negotiations a lot easier. Those were the days!
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Old 03-18-2009, 03:02 PM   #68
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No kidding. This was especially true toward the end of the Internet Bubble when techies were in demand. A friend of mine somehow came into a spreadsheet with all of my group's planned offers, so it made my own negotiations a lot easier. Those were the days!
I have a spreadsheet like that at the current gig. Unfortunately it shows that I'm overpaid for what I do, so there is zero leverage there.
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Old 03-18-2009, 03:16 PM   #69
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It's pretty safe to say that most people on this board would be considered "rich" by any standard. Because we mostly live below our means though, most of us have probably learned to fly successfully under the radar. But, with the current economic and political climate, are you taking any extra steps to keep a low profile?

We have been the recipients of a few disagreeable comments lately, that's why I'm asking.
FIREdreamer, guess my only quibble would be the part about '"rich" by any standards'.

I've heard many definitions of "rich". I think my favorite is: Rich is having choices. In the context I heard it, the person was able to categorize most Americans as rich - by comparison to all of the third world. When you go to your closet to dress each morning you are "forced" to choose which clothes to wear for the day. You go to the firdge and are forced to choose which food to prepare. You drive to the market and are forced to choose what items to purchase. You have choices. The truly "poor" person (3rd world standards) may literally have one set of clothes, one type of staple which is eaten at all meals, has no market other than barter for staples, etc.

I don't mean to turn this into a touchy-feely discussion of rich vs. poor. I'm simply pointing out that there are standards by which we measure our "richness" or "wealth" - it's always in comparison to something (someone) else.

Personally, I don't "feel" rich, but somehow I "know" that I am rich. Hope that makes some sense. I rarely worry about what others think about my personal situation. If they are boorish about it, I tend to stay away from them in the future. I don't live a lavish life style, but I make very conscious decisions about how I spend my wealth. Because my choices are different than my peers, sometimes they assume I am more wealthy than they are. In fact, they probably have earned more than I have (after all, they're still working and I'm retired), but they have made different choices. I never criticize their choices and I do resent it if they criticize mine.

So, if my ramblings have any point, I guess it's that being rich has more to do with what I would call "good" choices than about absolute accumulation of money or possessions. I plan no changes in that philosophy to lower my profile nor to please anyone else.

By the way, thanks for bringing up this topic. It has brought out many thoughtful and colorful repsonses.
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Old 03-18-2009, 04:09 PM   #70
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[quote=HFWR;796610]Yeah, I gave up wearing my bling...

That's not funny! Word around here is that a lot of con artists are checking out the elderly at restaurants, groceries stores, etc. and if they look like they might have bucks because of the jewelry they are wearing, they follow them home and on some pretense gain access to the house. One keeps the couple busy while the other robs them blind and takes what they are wearing. In these economic times, the worst in people come out. This was on the local news the other day. Beware!
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Old 03-18-2009, 05:35 PM   #71
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Yeah, I gave up wearing my bling...
That's not funny! Word around here is that a lot of con artists are checking out the elderly at restaurants, groceries stores, etc. and if they look like they might have bucks because of the jewelry they are wearing, they follow them home and on some pretense gain access to the house. One keeps the couple busy while the other robs them blind and takes what they are wearing. In these economic times, the worst in people come out. This was on the local news the other day. Beware!
My "bling" consists of a Timex Ironman runner's watch...

The worst kind of low-life scum are those who prey on the elderly. I hope some grandpa fills their assets with buckshot!
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Old 03-18-2009, 06:27 PM   #72
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The other day I mentioned to someone that they are laying off people at DH's workplace. I said we were glad we had our emergency savings and had enough to cover a year's expenses, if necessary.

The response was "You fat cat!"

It was out of my mouth before I realized how it would sound who those who don't have that much saved. I guess I'm too used to talking with this crowd here on the ER board.

Otherwise, we keep a low profile...except for all that travel we do. Going on 2 cruises in a year certainly raised some eyebrows at work.
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Old 03-18-2009, 10:57 PM   #73
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And I would have thought that someone writing a reply like that would have considered saying, "... in a teachers' break room..." .
I'm not sure the possessive is used there Rich, but maybe someone who knows about such things will comment....... DW is a POEM* member but she's asleep already. I'll ask her tomorrow.

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Old 03-18-2009, 11:33 PM   #74
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Yes, I am keeping a low profile. I'm usually pretty low profile anyway, but even more so than usual. Another round of layoffs is coming soon and I want them to think I NEED this job. I've seen folks perceived as financially more well off targeted before, though it was unclear whether it was because they didn't feel as bad taking the job away from someone who needed it less, or because they want the people remaining to be as dependent as possible - and therefor as likely to accept the other demands and concessions coming. Either way, the more they think I need the work, the better my chances of staying past the next job cuts.
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Old 03-19-2009, 08:37 AM   #75
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We've always been "financially conservative" so I suppose that counts as being under the radar. It's nice to learn that we're rich, although I did notice yesterday that my underwear does have holes in it, and two pairs of jeans are wearing through, as are my sneakers, so I guess I'll have to go shopping soon. Maybe next year even.

But a few months ago I bought a new motorcycle, and today we're going out to spend $600+ on riding gear for DW, who hasn't been on it yet.

What we do not have is debt. We hate debt. It always felt like a dark cloud overhead. Debt restricts future options/activities for the sake of immediate gratification. We'd rather have options.
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Old 03-19-2009, 11:26 AM   #76
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Our only concession to living big is our recent St. Patty's day party, which was certainly over the top, cost wise, in our crowd. But I just explained it away as that we decided to invest in the party instead of my Roth IRA this year.

While not true, it did smooth over things just a bit with our friends whose parties don't compare to ours. And it wasn't quite as much as a Roth contribution, but darned close!

I figure we were, for once, doing our part to keep the economy going--buying booze, paying the band, everyone buying tacky green outfits, etc.

With two friends out of work this year, we try not to point out that we have money to save and invest. Well, technically only one of them is still out of work, and he's living with us, so I think he knows we have money to spare since we aren't charging him rent!
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Old 03-19-2009, 11:37 AM   #77
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Well, we're not rich by any definition. Frugal, yes. Rich, no. I do feel bad for my friends who are dealing with layoffs. Several of my closest friends' husbands have lost their jobs. And here's my dh not working for pay by choice. I will say he is working hard on home renovations, child rearing, and flying to Mich. to help his parents.

OT, Last week i told someone at church DH was plastering the utility room. They thought I said he was plastered in the utility room. lol

I am very guilty, however, of being critical of how others spend their money or rather seem to make money decisions I consider unwise or unnecessary all the while complaining they have no money or no job or behind on mortgage payments or what have you. I know no one is going to choose to live on as little as we do, except for Uncle Mick probably. I should not judge others by what we do. I have started mentioning that when people bring up what we are doing. I state that we are radical about it, and no one would be choosing to do it like we are.

I have offered to help people with ideas and budgeting, though most people don't want advice. But if someone wants my help, I'm happy to discuss our choices. And that is what it really comes down to: choices we've made that have given us our freedom. As someone mentioned, that freedom is worth more than anything I could buy.
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Old 03-19-2009, 11:40 AM   #78
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It's nice to learn that we're rich, although I did notice yesterday that my underwear does have holes in it, and two pairs of jeans are wearing through, as are my sneakers, so I guess I'll have to go shopping soon. Maybe next year even.
Be careful with those worn jeans. Yesterday I was walking along and some old cutie comes up to me and says, "Honey, always wear that green hat. You look soo good". The worst of it is I found myself thinking, she doesn't look too bad, maybe she has a place to bathe?

Today I threw out my jeans with holes and put on a new pair.

Ha
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Old 03-19-2009, 11:48 AM   #79
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Less than before in some ways. Now if the conversation turns to a beating in the stock market, I freely admit that we have been hit hard as well. Whereas before, I would not comment on market rallies, etc., or anything that implied we had appreciating assets.

Audrey
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Old 03-19-2009, 11:50 AM   #80
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Be careful with those worn jeans. Yesterday I was walking along and some old cutie comes up to me and says, "Honey, always wear that green hat. You look soo good".

Maybe she had something else in mind.
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